Faith was red in the face from laughter. She’d been complaining of a stitch in her left side for five minutes, but Betty had persisted – ‘What? I don’t think it’s an unfair question’ – which only made Faith laugh all the more. By the time Cora and Molly were waddling back into the living room, laden with trays of snacks and glasses of wine, Faith was panting out of an open window.
‘We either missed something good or terrible.’ Molly sounded nervous. ‘Which?’
‘Hilarious,’ Faith answered. She was still breathless. She let out an ‘oof’ sort of noise while she fanned herself, pulling winter air into the warmth of the room. ‘Betty would like to know the intricacies of female sexy time.’ She tried to keep a straight face but there was a smile cracking through every other word. ‘Apparently she’s curious but not curious-curious, only like, straight-woman curious.’
‘I don’t understand what’s so funny, if I’m honest.’ Betty looked to me for support but I’d tried hard not to get involved. The more interested I appeared, the more likely it was that I’d be accused of being curious, and I wasn’t sure what my face would do if that happened. I wasn’t curious-curious either, I was sure of it. But not sure enough for the conversation to feel comfortable.
‘Bett,—’ Molly handed her a glass ‘—don’t you think you’re just being nosy?’
‘I mean, no nosier than the rest of us are being when we talk about sex with men.’
‘She’s got a point there.’ Cora threw a cheese ball into her mouth. ‘If Lily were here—’
‘If Lily were here instead of getting busy with her post-grad boy toy, she’d definitely want to know more about it,’ Betty interrupted.
Faith slammed the window closed, then, and moved back to her beanbag next to the radiator. ‘Lily doesn’t need to ask me. She’s worldly enough to know these answers for herself. And no—’ she held a finger up in response to Betty’s dropped jaw ‘—I’m not accusing Lily of being a big lez, or even a little one, I’m just saying she’s read the right books.’
‘Okay, well gimme a reading list.’
‘Are you allowed to say “big lez”?’ Cora asked around another cheese ball.
‘Gay rights. I can, but you can’t.’ Faith’s phone pinged and it pulled her attention away from the conversation.
‘Is it her?’ Molly asked.
‘It is.’
I couldn’t help myself. ‘Who?’
Faith made me wait until she’d stopped texting before she answered. ‘Okay, you know Barker’s Pool Hall down in the city centre …’
I already knew what was coming. She was texting Audrey. She was the new bartender who’d joined Barker’s around a month earlier. Audrey went to our university, lived off-campus with her older-than-her boyfriend – who, rumour had it, had left his wife for Audrey six months back – and she was what I thought male writers must mean when they described a woman as drop-dead gorgeous. But she was nice with it. The few times I’d spoken to her – usually when it had been my round to buy – she’d asked how I was and how studies were, and she’d tilted her head in a way that made her look sincerely interested in my responses (even if she was being paid to ask the questions in the first place). She had a smile that warmed my insides and hair that I felt both jealous of and something else entirely towards – but I’d tried my utmost not to think too hard about the latter.
‘She’s with someone, though, right?’ Cora asked.
‘Ack, come on. How bothered is she if she’s texting me?’
‘Walk me through it.’ Betty lay on her front but propped herself up on her elbows. ‘You what, focus your sights on a woman and then lay a careful plan to seduce her out of straightness?’
There was a murmur of giggles from the group. Faith only cocked an eyebrow, though. ‘Please,’ she said, already reaching for her phone again. ‘Straight is an abstract idea. There aren’t straight women. Only women who haven’t met Faith.’
It was met with further squeals of laughter from the group. But there was a homing pigeon banging around in my chest. And I was too bothered by it to laugh along.