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OMG I kissed Cal. OMG I kissed Cal. OMG I kissed Cal.
Rose was glad to discover that the porchlight was on—it meant they had power. She hurried inside, toed off her sandals, ran upstairs to her bedroom, and shut the door.
She’d kissed him so he’d stop talking. So he wouldn’t say anything about how he’d finger-fucked her behind the bar. Except kissing him had been the wrong way to solve that problem, especially since it had been just as good as she’d remembered, possibly even better, and it had made her feel things she hadn’t felt in a long time. What had she been thinking?
She hadn’t been thinking, that was the problem.
And now she’d kissed her roommate, and she had to keep living with him.
She slid down to the floor in front of her bedroom door and leaned back against it. It was the stupid blackout’s fault. If it hadn’t been for the power going out, they would have finished their episode of The Untamed. Then she would have gone upstairs and read a little. She was reading a steampunk novel now and...
Oh, God.
That made her think of Cal, too. Of the night they’d met, once again.
But she hadn’t been able to leave everything in the past. She’d kissed him, and he’d seemed very happy to kiss her back, but when he’d used his tongue, she’d remembered that tongue being in other places.
Oh, God, what had she done?
She’d told herself that even though she was attracted to Cal, she wasn’t going to do anything about it. It was too risky, and besides, she was already dating Ray.
How had she forgotten about Ray?
She picked up her phone and did something she never, ever did: she called a friend. Called, not texted.
“Rose?” Nicole said. “Is everything okay?”
“The power went out and Cal and I went for a walk and got bubble tea and I kissed him and then I ran home.” As she said it, she heard the front door open. He was here. “And now the power is on, and oh my God, I cheated on Ray!”
“You didn’t cheat. You’ve been on two dates, and I can’t imagine you’ve talked about being exclusive.”
“No...”
“You did nothing wrong.”
“Did you hear me? I kissed Cal. He’s my roommate, and it was already weird, and now it’s going to be even weirder.”
“Was it a good kiss?” Nicole asked.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“So it was good.”
“Stop smirking!” Rose cried.
“Why do you think I’m smirking? You can’t see me. This isn’t a video call.”
“I can just tell.”
“Rose,” Nicole said soothingly. “Why did you kiss him?”
“Because he was pissing me off!”
Nicole’s laughter traveled over the phone.
You still want to kiss me, even now that you know what I’m really like?
Why wouldn’t I?
Those words came back to Rose now. The circumstances of tonight’s kiss had been completely different from their first kiss, all those months ago. Then, they’d been strangers at a bar. That was before she’d cried on his couch in the middle of the night. Before he’d seen her enormous collection of plushies. Before...so many things.
He didn’t know everything about her, no, but he knew her pretty well, and that hadn’t turned him off.
There was a soft knock on her door. She startled.
“Rose, are you okay?” Cal asked.
“Yes!” she called out, louder than necessary considering they were separated only by her door.
“I’ll be in my room if you need me.”
She stayed silent as he padded away.
“Were you just talking to him?” Nicole asked.
“He was checking up on me,” Rose replied. “He’s gone now. I can’t believe I’ve kissed two guys in the past few weeks. Two!”
“Who was better?”
“Nicole!”
“What, it’s a fair question. Not that ‘who is the better kisser?’ is the only consideration, but still.”
“Cal,” Rose said, before she could think better of it. God, what was with her today?
But she couldn’t risk him breaking her heart again. That would be too much for her, and she was in a fragile place mentally, even if things were better than they’d been in the winter. Besides, she didn’t even know what Cal wanted.
“But you still want to see what happens with Ray?” Nicole asked. “Are you sure?”
“Yes.” Rose felt a moment of disappointment after saying that word, but she pushed it aside.
“Whatever happens, we’ll be there for you. You know that, don’t you?”
“Yes.” Rose smiled weakly. “I know.”
But the worst she could feel was a very scary place, and she had to do her best to avoid it.
* * *
Cal stared at the TV. “Wow. That was amazing.”
“It was, wasn’t it?” Rose said.
He’d been a little skeptical he’d enjoy a fifty-episode show that had confused him so thoroughly at the beginning, but he’d agreed to watch it because...well.
Because he had a thing for Rose, and he wanted to learn more about what she enjoyed.
But as it turned out, he’d liked it quite a bit.
He hated that it was over, and he feared they’d spend less time together now. Things had become more awkward since the power outage two days ago. She seemed to be making even more of an effort to avoid him, and he was giving her whatever space she needed, even if it wasn’t what he wanted.
She was clearly rattled by the kiss, and he wanted to comfort her, like he had the night she couldn’t sleep, but he knew he was the wrong person for that. He didn’t know what he ought to do but figured it was best to take his cues from her.
It was just difficult when all he wanted was to hold her. And to slide the strap of her tank top down her shoulder...
“Do you want to watch another Asian drama together?” she asked.
“Yes,” he said immediately.
“I’ll send you a few titles, and you can look them up and decide which you’d prefer.”
“Sounds good.”
Whatever one has more episodes. That way I can spend the most time with you.
“Maybe we can start it tomorrow,” he said. “What would you like for dinner? We can—”
“No, I have a date.”
“With Ray?”
“Yeah.”
Cal couldn’t help thinking about their kiss two nights ago, and he was positive she was thinking about it, too.
How can you go on a date with him after that?
He wouldn’t ask her that, however. She’d get annoyed with him.
That night, when Cal climbed into bed, his mind drifted to what would happen if she were in his bed. If she let him kiss her in other places: her throat, her shoulder, her breasts. If she arched against him and pushed his head between her legs...
That’s right, Rose. Let me give you what you want. Let me take care of you.
He had to jerk himself off before he could sleep.
* * *
“Hey, man, what’s up with you today?” Peter asked Cal.
“Nothing’s up,” Cal growled, stabbing the soil with his shovel.
Okay, he could see Peter’s point. He wasn’t acting like his usual self.
“She’s going on a date tonight,” Cal said.
“Not with you, I presume?”
Cal didn’t bother responding.
“This is your roommate?” Peter asked. “The one who’s definitely nothing more than a roommate? That one?”
Cal shot him a murderous look.
God, he really wasn’t himself at work today, and he hated it. And he wasn’t looking forward to going home, either. There was no way in hell he could stand to be around when Rose got ready for her date, especially if Ray was going to pick her up.
Nope, Cal would go out, maybe get drunk. That seemed like the best plan. Maybe Peter would be willing to join him.
But what if Ray spent the night?