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“You gonna tell me what’s going on, man?”
Zach’s eyes finally left the label on his beer bottle and met Cody’s. “Sorry, dude, I’m not much company tonight.”
Ever since he’d found out Libby didn’t date, he’d been dragging ass. Why the hell didn’t she date? Did that mean like ever? Had she never dated or was this a new thing? Even worse was it just a way of brushing him off?
“No shit. But see, the thing is, I got a sitter. Do you know how hard it is to find a decent babysitter in this town?” Zach had a feeling he was about to find out. “Hard. Really fucking hard. But I got one. Just for tonight. So ... get your shit together and tell me what the hell is going on with you because I only got a few more hours of precious freedom. And I gotta tell ya, your mopey ass is one hell of a downer.”
Great. Now he had to add guilt to the mix of emotions bubbling in his belly. Cody’s eyes darkened as he gave him that cop look that he no doubt used on suspects. Suspicious. Irritated. And a little disappointed.
“There’s this girl ...” Zach was done as soon as he saw the devilish expression scrunch up his friend’s features. “Forget it.”
Cody was not going to forget it. “Is this the chick you were getting it on with in Farm n’ Fresh?”
“Jesus Christ. This fucking town.” His fingers were now ruffling his own hair in frustration. “I was not getting it on with anyone in the damn Farm n’ Fresh!”
His friend’s snigger soon turned into a throaty laugh, giving Zach time to sigh and scan his surroundings. They were at the Tipsy Cow, the only place to get a decent drink in Woodvalley Pines. It was packed full of the usual suspects. Ranch hands gathered around the dart board and pool table, while older cowboys propped up the bar. And a handful of couples filled up the wooden booths scattered around the edges of the dimly lit dance floor.
No one was line dancing tonight, though. Not on a Tuesday night. Which was why he was there. In a dark corner at one of the scratched high-top tables, getting laughed at.
“Okay, okay. It’s not that funny. You really do need to get out more, man.”
Cody managed to compose himself fairly quickly. “I ain’t arguing with that. You never know, tonight’s sitter might stick around, and then I could actually start going out again. Maybe even get me a date.”
Zach sobered, his own melancholy taking a backseat for a moment. Some days it was easy to forget what Cody and his son, Dylan had been through. Other times, like now, he was reminded of just how strong his friend was.
Cody’s wife, Dylan’s mom, had passed away four years ago after a long battle with breast cancer. His friend had no time to grieve though. No time to mourn the loss of the love of his life – overnight he’d become a single dad to a confused and grieving five-year-old. And that’s all he focused on at the time and all he’d focused on since. Being the best dad he could be to Dylan.
Nowadays, that’s what defined Cody. Being a dad first. A cop second. The man he is outside of those two things rarely made an appearance. But tonight, Zach saw a glimpse of him. The old Cody. The funny, carefree, wild guy he used to race ATVs with.
“Come on, spit it out. Who is she?” Cody’s question brought Zach back to the present.
“Libby. Her name’s Libby.” Zach was back to fiddling with his beer bottle. “There’s just something about her ... I don’t know, I can’t explain it.”
“Okay, so what’s the problem? Those dimples of yours not working out for you this time?”
Zach scoffed. “You could say that.” He ran his nail through the damp label, slowly picking off the paper. “Apparently she doesn’t date.”
That statement earned him another chuckle. “Let me guess ... you’re trying to change her mind?”
“I just don’t get it ... why she’s fighting it. There’s something between us, and I know she feels it, too. I mean it’s fucking electric, man. Seriously, since the first moment I laid eyes on her. Anytime she’s near me, my whole damn body lights up like a freakin’ Christmas tree.”
Cody let out a low whistle. “She’s that hot, huh?”
Hell yeah, she is.
“It’s not just that. Yeah, she’s hot ... but it’s more than that.” It was hard to explain. Even to himself. But he would try. “I like who she is as a person. All the different sides. The sweet side, the shy side, the sassy side. She makes me laugh. She’s real smart too. And so easy to talk to. Like, one minute we’re joking around with each other and the next we’re having a serious conversation about our lives. Nothing is forced, it just feels natural.” He let out the breath he’d been holding. “I like her, Cody. A lot. And for the first time ever, I don’t know what to do about it.”
Cody looked at him thoughtfully. All traces of humor gone from his face. “You know what to do.”
“I do?”
“Yeah, man ... you do. Let me ask you something. The girl doesn’t date, right?” Zach nodded despite his friend already knowing the answer. “So how is it you’ve been hanging out with her? Seeing all these different sides to her?”
He didn’t know where his friend was going with this, but he’d take all the help he could get.
“Well ... the first time there was a fire, that’s how we met. The second time, I ran into her at the Farm n’ Fresh” – Zach rolled his eyes as Cody choked mid-sip and sprayed beer all over the table – “where other than me inviting myself over to her place, nothing happened.”
“Sorry, sorry,” Cody said through laughter. Definitely not sorry at all. “Go on. You invited yourself over, and ...”
“And,” Zach continued. “Well, we hung out. I brought over some Chinese food and a toaster – long story. Before I left, I invited her to that fundraiser we had at the fire station. After some convincing, she agreed to go with me, and it was nice. We spent the whole day together and she met the guys. Then I take her home and she drops the bombshell that she doesn’t date. No explanation. Just that she thinks I’m a nice guy, blah, blah, but she doesn’t date.”
Ever since she’d told him, he’d regretted not asking why. At the time, he didn’t want to spook her. He wanted to see her again and he knew pushing her would jeopardise that. But now he was kicking himself. Driving himself crazy trying to think of all the possible reasons why she would give up on dating.
When he glanced up at Cody, he had a smug grin on his face. He’d grown up with that grin. It was the same one he offered up every time he’d beaten him at video games as a kid.
“What?” Zach asked, growing impatient.
The grin grew wider. “When did you say you were seeing her again?”
He didn’t. But he had a feeling Cody already knew that. “Dinner. Friday night.”
Cody barked out another laugh. “Jesus H Christ. You really have no idea, do you?”
What the hell was he talking about? A question he was quick to ask.
“Come on. Take a moment. Think about what you’ve just said,” Cody teased. When Zach only glared, he decided to put him out of his misery. “Fuck, man. You are dating her! Dinner, day out, another dinner ... I bet you got her number too, right?”
“Yeah, but—”
“But she told you she doesn’t date.” His friend took the words right out of his mouth. “Yeah, yeah. See, here’s the thing about dating – you use that time to get to know each other, right? Talk, go out, not have sex ... Well, it seems to me that’s exactly what you’re doing.”
“Friends do that too.” Zach pointed out.
“Friends aren’t attracted to each other. Are you sure she’s into you like that?”
Zach’s lips curled up as he thought back to the blush that crawled up Libby’s neck whenever he got close. And that sexy hitch in her breath every time his mouth grazed her cheek. “Yeah. I’m sure.”
“Well then, sounds to me like you’ve got nothing to be moping about. Carry on doing what you’re doing. Oh, and try and find out why she doesn’t date. Might be easier to know what you’re up against before you try and take things to the next level.”
He couldn’t believe it. Cody was right.
First time for everything.
Zach could live without the label. Use this time to actually get to know her. The attraction was there, so he just had to be patient. Wait for her to catch up.
Feeling infinitely better than he had five minutes ago, Zach drained the rest of his beer. The next round was on him.
***
He had this. He totally had this. So why did he feel like he was way out of his league? Zach glanced over at the groceries on his front seat again, then back at the shiny red door.
I totally have this.
Don’t I?
There was no more time for self-doubt. Libby was waiting.
Forcing himself into action, he grabbed the brown paper bag and hauled himself out of the car. He followed the path toward Libby’s house and attempted to swallow down the very new lump that had made its way down his throat.
This was stupid. He was a grown man. Not some pimply teenager. He needed to pull his head out of his ass and remember who he was.
You fight fires for a living – start acting like it.
One bell ring later, the door flung open and Libby’s warm smile was hitting him square in the chest. Chocolate-brown hair cascaded over her shoulders and down to her chest in soft waves, but, as usual, it was her glittery eyes that held him hostage.
“Looking beautiful tonight, princess.”
He watched as her nose crinkled while she scanned her own outfit.
“My sweatpants are beautiful?” she challenged.
“No ... but the woman in them is.”
“This isn’t a date,” she reminded him, her smile quickly disappearing.
“Is that why you wore sweatpants?”
“Maybe.”
It was his turn to smile. So transparent. “Well, not sure your cunning plan worked, princess ... ‘cause you still look hot as fuck in those pants.” He let his gaze trail down her body. “Actually, I’m pretty sure the way they cling to those curves of yours is gonna make me blush. I’m not sure how appropriate that would be – considering this isn’t a date.”
His plan worked. She was blushing again. Now all he had to do was control himself. And put his tongue back in his mouth. The black yoga pants she had on were the biggest test. Paired with a white vest and a black lace bra on full display –he was in for a tough night.
“Those lines normally work for you?” Pink cheeks diluted some of her sass.
“You always take compliments so well?” He could do this all night.
A cute little growl slipped past those pouted lips. “You’re lucky I’m hungry.” The door opened wider as she gestured him inside. “So, what did you bring?”
“You like steak?” Zach turned briefly to make sure she was following him as he made a beeline for the kitchen.
“Is the sky blue? Of course I like steak. You’re making us steak?”
“Is the sun hot?” he teased.
“You’re hilarious.”
“I try.” He broke into another smile as he settled the groceries onto her countertop. “Yes, we’re having steak, corn and sweet potato fries.”
Libby, in turn, beamed so bright it was almost blinding. “I think my stomach just did a happy dance.”
Zach fought the urge to pull her into his arms and show her his own version of a happy dance.
Easy.
“I’m getting real good at guessing the things you like, aren’t I? First Chinese, now steak,” he boasted. “Maybe it’s a sign we’re meant to be.”
“Or maybe you just got lucky,” she said as she crossed her arms over her chest.
“Whoa, easy there, darlin’... this isn’t a date, remember?” he joked. He didn’t think he’d ever get sick of seeing those rosy cheeks burn.
“On that note.” She swivelled on her heel. “I’m gonna go put my work stuff away. Then I’ll come help you.” Libby couldn’t get out of there fast enough. He knew she felt it too. Every accidental touch, every shared laugh, every smile exchanged made the air crackle. Made it hard to breathe.
You have to be patient, remember? You’re giving her time to catch up.
Despite the reminder, he wasn’t feeling very patient.
Tough shit.
It was tough shit. But he had no other choice but to man up and unpack the groceries. He had a woman to get to know and a dinner to cook.
By the time Libby returned, he’d made good progress. The fries were in the air fryer and the corn was on the grill. All that was left to do was fry up some steaks.
“Smells good in here,” she declared.
“Thanks.” He peered up to find her watching him intently. One hip rested against the kitchen counter. “Should be ready soon. You get all your work done?” he asked through the satisfying sizzles from the steak now echoing around the room.
“Yup, that big project I told you about, well, I stayed up late last night finishing it off, so it was an easy day today. I just got on with some work for existing clients.” His eyes followed her as she reached into the top cupboard and pulled out some plates. “What about you, were you working today?”
Dragging his eyes away from her, he returned his attention to the pan as Libby began setting the table. “Not today, no. I work four days on, four days off, twelve-hour shifts. I’m back on the rota tomorrow, then my next day off is Wednesday.”
“Damn, twelve hours. Day or night?”
“Days, eight till eight.” As Zach flipped the steaks, his stomach let out an embarrassingly loud growl as the tantalising aroma hit his nostrils.
Thankfully, Libby didn’t seem to notice, she was too busy clinking cutlery against the wooden surface behind him. “Wow. Long day. Do you sleep at the station?”
“Sometimes, yeah. I don’t always finish on time, and it makes sense to crash there when that happens. They’ve got everything I need after a shift – a bed, a shower and a kitchen full of food.”
“Makes sense,” she agreed. She’d moved on to clinking glasses.
Steaks done, it was time to eat. Using the dishes Libby had thoughtfully placed next to him, Zach started to serve up the food. Once he’d finished piling their plates, he brought them over to the table. A table, to his surprise, Libby had adorned with candles, napkins and an array of condiments.
Cody was right. This was basically a date. She just didn’t want to admit it.
“I poured myself some wine, but I didn’t know if you drank wine, so I didn’t pour you any. Do you like wine? If not, I think I have some soda ... or some vodka. I didn’t really think to buy beer. I bet you like beer?” She was babbling now. Nervous babbling. He noticed the nearer he got, the more flustered she became. He loved every second of it.
Patience, he reminded himself.
“This all looks so good,” she exclaimed as he settled her plate in front of her. “Thank you.”
His smile had been cartoon-wide since she’d stepped into the kitchen. He didn’t think it was possible for it to get any bigger. But one look at her admiring his food and just like that, it stretched.
“Wine is good for me.” Another smile was sent his way as she went about filling his glass with ruby red liquid. “Thanks, darlin’. Now eat up before it gets cold.”
“You don’t have to tell me twice!”
Like the other times they’d hung out, conversation flowed easily, despite the crackle. During dinner she told him about the big project she’d been working on and in turn, he spoke more about his own work. Unsurprisingly, she had a lot of questions. It was one of the things he liked most about her. Her unfiltered curiosity.
Time flew by. It wasn’t until his phone vibrated with a message from Cody that he realized just how much. Three hours they’d been sitting there. Empty plates abandoned and wine glasses drained. He hadn’t even asked the question he’d been dying to ask yet.
There’s no time like the present.
“Why don’t you date?” he blurted.
Smooth.
Of course she was shocked. His question had been right out of left field. They’d been talking about forest fires, for God’s sake.
“Uh, do you want some more wine? I’m gonna get some more wine.” Libby scrambled up out of her chair so fast, if he’d blinked, he would have missed it.
Damnit. He’d spooked her. But there was no taking the question back now. It was out there. Begging to be answered.
He cleared his throat. Was it just him or did the air all of a sudden feel thicker? “No more for me, I’m driving.” He paused, waiting for Libby to refill her glass before he tried again. “So? The no dating thing?”
Libby didn’t hide her discomfort. But she did finally sit back down. Her gaze was averted, and she’d already started fidgeting. “Uh, well, it’s sort of a long story.”
“I’ve got time.”
“I’ll bet.” A swig of her drink later, piercing eyes eventually met his. “I move around a lot, okay? I’ve always moved around a lot. I don’t exactly have a dating-friendly lifestyle.”
“True. But that’s not the reason you don’t date.”
He already knew he’d assumed correctly. But her deflated sigh confirmed it. “Fine. But it’s a factor. Kind of.”
“Well?”
“Well ... I guess I’m a non-believer, okay?”
“A non-believer?” What the hell does that mean?
“Yeah. A non-believer. I’m one of those people that don’t believe in ‘happily ever after’. It’s all just such bullshit. And before you start listing off all the happy couples you know who’ve been together for fifty years or something, let me clarify by saying that, yes, ever after does exist – I’m guessing probably out of a mixture of stubbornness and lethargy – but that doesn’t mean they’re happy. Like truly, Disney, singing critters happy.”
What?
Instinctively, Zach's hand went to his chest, where he began to rub. Why did hearing that sting so much?
“So that’s it?” he began. “’Cause there’re no singing critters running around, you’ve shunned the whole dating thing? Have you ever dated? Had a relationship of any kind? Or is this all observation-based research?”
“You seem kinda angry.”
If only she knew how hard his heart was pounding against his ribcage.
“Not angry, just confused. I mean, you can’t write off relationships if you’ve never had one.” He was guessing she hadn’t. Not a healthy one, anyway. “You can’t assume to know what’s going on in other people’s relationships, either. Just ‘cause things might get hard, doesn’t automatically mean a couple is unhappy. That’s just life. I don’t know ... it just seems a little extreme to me, that’s all.”
He added that last bit with a shrug in an attempt to temper some of his frustration. And disappointment.
As soon as he was done, he lost Libby’s gaze. Instead, she decided to take an active interest in swiping off imaginary lint from her yoga pants.
Clearly, he was taking this hard because he wanted to date her. As far as hurdles go, her not believing in dating, or in relationships in general was a pretty freaking massive one.
What were you expecting?
It was a valid question. She’d already told him she didn’t date. But a part of him must have hoped it was for a reason that could be fixed. Like a bad break-up. This reason didn’t seem fixable.
When Libby eventually looked back up, apprehension was clear on her face. “You’re right, it’s probably not fair to judge relationships when I’ve never been in one.”
Zach guessed right. But it was still crazy. How was it possible this beautiful, smart, sexy woman had never been in a relationship?
“And no, I don’t know what’s going on in every relationship.” She continued. “But see, the thing is, I have witnessed a lot of relationships and when I say a lot, I mean a lot. As in, multiple men in my daily life, in my house, in my living room, half naked in my kitchen ... a good eighteen years’ worth.”
Oh shit. “Your mom?”
“My mom.”
He glanced back down to her hands. She was fiddling with her fingers again. But this time, she wasn’t hiding it. Zach looked back up. He didn’t miss the sadness in her eyes as they remained firmly on him.
“My mom, the eternal, Disney-chasing optimist who followed losers from town to town all her life and dragged me along for the ride. She was desperate to find ‘The One’. But you know what she found instead?”
“I have a feeling it wasn’t good.”
“A parade of pricks.” The anger resonating in her voice was unmistakable. “Pricks who chipped away at her self-esteem. Took her money. Made her cry herself to sleep every single night. And then what did they do? They left. They all left. And who was there to pick up the pieces every time? Me. So forgive me if I don’t exactly believe in ‘The One’ or ‘happily ever after’. I mean, would you?”
No. He supposed he wouldn’t. He got it now. No wonder she didn’t want a relationship if that was her only experience of being in one. He just wished he could show her what it was meant to be like. But if the sadness glimmering in those big eyes was anything to go by, she wasn’t ready for that.
She might never be ready.
The ache in his chest returned with a vengeance. For the first time in a long time, he didn’t know what to do.
Lost in his thoughts, he was quiet so long Libby had given up waiting for a reply. She was out of her seat and clearing plates.
Goddamn.
The last thing he wanted was for her to regret opening up to him. He knew sharing something so personal took courage. That was why he rose. It was also why he stalked toward the sink and placed his hands on top of the countertop on either side of a surprised Libby. He dipped his head until their faces were just inches apart.
Leaning into her further, Zach let his mouth hover over hers. Just for a second. He used that time to search her green gaze. Looking for clues.
“I wouldn’t believe in happily ever after either, princess.” As her shaky exhale warmed his skin, he felt his pulse quicken. “But what is it they say? Don’t knock it ... till you try it?”
“Let me guess. You want me to try it with you?”
He had to stifle a groan as her tongue darted out and ran along her lower lip. Was she doing this on purpose?
Pressing his forehead into hers, his eyes flickered shut as he took in a deep breath. His lungs filled with the enticing aroma of roses. “Yeah, darlin’, I want you to try with me.”
He let his mouth brush against hers. It was a test. He needed to know she felt it too. That he wasn’t losing his mind.
Libby’s breathing became heavier, and the taste of anticipation coated his lips. It took all of his control to wait. But that’s what he did. Thankfully, she didn’t make him wait long. All it took was one delicate but deliberate graze and the world around him blurred. He could no longer think. He could only feel. And feel he did.
Zach felt heat shoot through his veins as he pushed her lips apart. He needed to get deeper. Taste everything. Sweeping his tongue inside, he was met with the same urgency from her. They moved together in perfect rhythm, igniting every ember and giving into the flames as they danced around them.
Libby’s hands rose to his face. Slowly, they slid across his jaw before finding their way into his hair, tugging as she went until she’d pulled him even closer. So close their bodies melded into one. The full force of his desire pressed against her.
Zach greedily took what he wanted. Angling her face to get more. Deeper. Taking pleasure in every moan he swallowed. But it wasn’t enough. He needed more. He needed all of her.
Letting his hands slip down to her hips, he pressed into her again. Ensuring not even air could get between them. It was his turn to moan into her mouth as he felt her body tremble against him. But it was her hands that had him losing all control. Their sultry descent downward had him panting like a thirsty as fuck dog.
Not able to take it any longer, he lifted her onto the countertop and pushed his big body between her thighs. More of her whimpers vibrated down his throat as her delicate fingers traced his chest. He let her explore. Take what she wanted.
Moments later, Zach was tugging down her vest, and the bra beneath it. He was pretty sure a growl escaped as his hands met with supple soft skin.
Fuck me. She’s like a goddamn drug.
A drug he’d happily become addicted to.
He was done kissing her. For now. There was something else he wanted to taste. With that in mind, he let his mouth trail down her neck. Occasionally he’d stop to nibble and suck until more moans emanated from deep within her. Immeasurable satisfaction pooled inside his stomach as she flung her head back.
I’m only just getting started.
When he got to her collarbone, he let his teeth scrape over her skin, eliciting more sexy cries. Damnit. Those noises could drive a man to insanity. So could her taste. Dragging his tongue down her chest, he unravelled.
A tortured sounding “Yes” echoed around the room as his mouth latched onto a hardened nipple. If he thought her moans were loud before, they were nothing compared to the ones he was drawing out of her now. And it only added more fuel to the fire.
He used his fingers to twist and pinch her other nipple, teasing her with contrasting sensations. When he sucked hard on one side, he caressed the other. When he kissed away the sting, his caress was replaced with a squeeze. And so it went on. Over and over again. Until they were both shaking.
Libby was so responsive. More than he ever could have imagined. And it was the biggest turn on. Those sexy as hell sounds she was making would forever be engraved in his memory.
As he continued his frenzied attack on her chest, he felt her clawing at his shirt. He got the message. Loud and clear. He released her nipple just long enough to pull the material over his head. As soon as it fell to the floor, he was back on her. Unable to resist.
But as he returned to his teasing, something felt different. Something had shifted. Maybe coming up for air meant oxygen had finally reached his brain again. All he knew was he had to stop. Not because he wanted to. But because he needed to.
As much as he wanted to take her right there on the kitchen counter, he knew that would be the one and only time he had her. And he already knew that would never be enough. He wasn’t looking for a one-night stand. Not with her. He wanted more. And the only way he was going to get it, was by convincing her to take a chance on him. That wasn’t going to happen if they jumped straight to sex. If anything, it would be proving her point that you didn’t need to date or have relationships.
Even though he knew he’d be kicking himself later, he needed to end this. Ignore his pulsating body. Forgo a chance to get inside of her, and do the right thing.
“No.” He lifted his head but kept their bodies close.
“No?” Libby asked through laboured breaths, confusion written all over her face.
A groan slipped out as he took in the sight of her. Glazed eyes, swollen red lips and her top askew, exposing the most fantasy-inducing breasts and pert, pink nipples he’d ever seen.
Be strong, man.
He was feeling anything but strong. “Fuck.” It was an understatement. “We can’t. We have to stop.” This time he took a step back before he changed his mind.
“Why?”
Zach didn’t like the insecurity that radiated off of her in waves. Or the way her teeth had clamped down on her lower lip. He needed to set her straight. Immediately.
“Because, princess, I want more.” There was no point playing games. He was going to lay it all out for her. “I want to take you knowing you’re mine. And only mine. I want a relationship with you. I want to introduce you to my family. I want to claim you as my woman. Until you’re ready for all that ... we have to wait.”
He watched her suck in a deep breath. That’s when she lowered her eyes. Her bra was now readjusted, and her vest pulled back up. Ruining his view.
She was quiet for a while. Long enough for Zach to start questioning his sanity. When she did finally speak, her voice shook. “I think you should go.”
Fuck.