Alice sighed. Whenever she received a letter from her friend, Maggie, she felt that her life was somehow not exciting enough. Her vivid descriptions of the new world she had found herself in were so enticing. The rugged mountains, the handsome farmers and ranchers, and the wonderful friends she was making were torment enough, but when she regaled the tales of how perfect her new husband was it just made Alice feel very lonely indeed. Her life was not supposed to have turned out this way. When she had moved to Boston to take up a position as a chambermaid in Young’s Hotel, she had thought that she couldn’t possibly want for anything more. Sadly, years of cleaning up after the guests, working long hours and barely having a moment to herself had disabused her of the glamour of her position.
Maggie had been lucky. She was one of those women who hadn’t been afraid to take her future into her own hands, had placed an advertisement to find herself a husband. But, Alice read the newspapers, most women who answered such advertisements, let alone those that took the risk of placing them, were not so lucky. She had come upon lurid tales of ambush, kidnap, and much worse when she had first learned what Maggie intended to do. But now, it seemed that Sun River was becoming a haven for contented and even loving pairings. Alice was pleased for her, but she couldn’t help being more than a little jealous as she read Maggie’s latest news – it seemed that a loving husband was not enough, she now had a child on the way too.
A knock on her door made her jump out of her skin. “Alice love, could you possibly help me today?” Cook’s voice called through the closed door. “I know this is your day off, but the owner’s coming by, bringing a whole party with him. That man is the devil for late notice. But, what can I do?” Alice opened the door, Ellen looked almost frantic. She grinned at her, and gave the older woman a quick hug.
“Ellen, of course I will. I know you still haven’t found anyone suitable to take Maggie’s place, and the amount of work doesn’t change. Mr Reed-Whipple I presume?”
“Yes. Mr Hall at least has the decency to give me a day or two’s notice!” Ellen looked frazzled. Alice wished there was a way to reassure her, but they had little to no influence over their employers, and she was sure that if anyone tried to point out to the indomitable pairing that they needed to be more considerate that the person would find themselves out of a position – and without a character. They would be unlikely to ever find work in Boston, or along much of the East Coast, ever again.
“Just give me five minutes and I shall come down,” Alice told her friend. Ellen nodded, and looking a little soothed made her way back to the kitchens.
Alice tidied away her letter, and changed out of her smart muslin dress, and into a plain grey work one. She slipped a crisp white pinafore over the top and wondered if she would ever be permitted to have an entire day to herself. She couldn’t remember the last time she had been able to enjoy her day off. There was always some kind of crisis that desperately needed her. She didn’t blame Maggie for wanting something more at all. She couldn’t help but think that there had to be a better life than the one she was living.
Ellen had her up to her elbows in flour within moments of her setting foot in the kitchens. A game pie had been requested, and there was bread to be made too. While Ellen’s assistants got on with the daily requirements for the guests and the dining room, the two of them would prepare an entire banquet for thirty-two people. Ellen had been the Head Cook at Young’s for almost ten years now, and had worked for the inimitable Mr Young, and now for the two gentlemen who had come from Parker’s Hotel to take over. She was used to the demands, but it didn’t stop her worrying. The hotel had a reputation to uphold, and she didn’t ever want anyone to think her standards had slipped. Alice knew how much of a blow Maggie leaving had been to the older woman, but she also knew that she begrudged none of them their own lives.
“Did Maggie write to you of her news?” Ellen asked her, as she looked over the pastry crust Alice had just finished rolling out. “A little thinner, I think,” she added. Alice took up the rolling pin once more. The pastry eased out under the pressure.
“She did. Isn’t it wonderful that everything has gone so well for her?”
“It is. I loved her like she was my daughter, like I do you. The pair of you came to me when you were so young. I’ve seen you both grow up and become such beautiful, kind young ladies.”
“You miss her don’t you?”
“I do, and not just here in the kitchen. But, as I said to her, I will not be here long – so don’t make decisions about your lives because you don’t want to upset me.” Alice was surprised by her words. She had never confided to anyone that she was considering anything other than her life in the hotel. She had barely even acknowledged it to herself until she read Maggie’s letter just now. But, Ellen was wise and had seen many a young girl grow up, marry and move on here at Young’s.
“You are too astute for your own good Ellen. How did you know I have been feeling restless?”
“I don’t know exactly. I just know that there comes a time when even the most eager and the most ambitious of girls start to consider if there is something more. I know you covet Mrs Wainwright’s position, and I have no doubt that you would make a fine housekeeper – but she will not be leaving these halls for many a year to come.”
“I know, though many of the younger maids would be glad to see the back of her!”
“You are more like Maggie than you think you are Alice. I know you believe that you couldn’t just up and leave everything you know – but you have done it before, and you have thrived. You were just a farm girl, and now you are second only to the housekeeper in one of the most prestigious hotel’s in Boston. That took as much courage as leaving here to find a husband would.”
“Are you trying to get rid of me?” Alice asked, trying to make her tone teasing.
“Not at all. I would miss you terribly – as I do Maggie. But I will be retiring next year, and I want to know that you are happy.”
“I am.” Ellen looked at her searchingly. “No, truly. I am happy. I won’t lie to you Ellen. I do want marriage, and babies – what young woman does not dream of such things – but I want something more too.”
“I often wonder what women mean when they say they want more. What more is there?”
“I don’t know. Maybe it is because men get to have work and a family. They get to continue to pursue their interests, while a woman is frowned upon as unnatural, if she shows that she has anything more in her life than her family. Somehow none of it seems fair.” Ellen laughed.
“One day, you will understand that having a family becomes everything to you, if you are blessed enough to have one.” Alice chided herself silently. She shouldn’t have made little of motherhood. Poor Ellen had lost her husband and children in a tragic fire, many years ago. She missed them every day. “Don’t you go feeling sorry for me,” Ellen said, spotting the look on Alice’s face. “I was blessed to have a family, and then gain a new one here. You have all been my babies,” she said as she looked around at the young men and women scurrying around, hard at work.
“I think I am beginning to understand it now. Nothing seems to be enough anymore. I don’t think that getting the housekeeper’s position would be enough either. Oh, I am a foolish ninny – but maybe I am just starting to feel it may be too late if I do not do something soon.”
“Well, try not to make it too drastic a change!” Ellen laughed. “You will work it out, and will have my blessing whatever – so long as you are happy.”
They continued to work companionably through the day. When they were done there was a fine spread just waiting to be delivered to the dining hall. Alice couldn’t help but feel that maybe she was in the wrong position. There was something altogether very satisfying about seeing your work lined up on the tables in front of you. She enjoyed ensuring that every guest’s room was spotless, but because she did such a good job at it there was rarely a tangible difference between a room that needed cleaning, and one that she had just finished. As she looked at the crisp golden crusts of pies she had made, the elegant desserts and inhaled the scent of the loaves of fresh bread she felt at peace. It had been a good day’s work.
“Alice, I know this may be a difficult thing, considering our conversation earlier today – but would you consider taking Maggie’s position?” Ellen asked as they took off their aprons and sank into chairs by the fire. “You don’t have to tell me now, but think about it. You are a very talented cook, and I do believe that you would be happier here than under Mrs Wainwright. It would be an increase in salary, and you would get your own room and be able to share my parlor.” Alice looked at her friend. She was in earnest, and she knew that Ellen was hoping to take someone in the position that could take on her own role when she retired. Maggie had been the obvious choice, but she was no longer here. Alice wanted to say she was happy to say yes, that it would be the new challenge she was looking for – but something held her back.
“I will think about it,” she said. “But I need time.”
“I know.” Alice turned to leave the kitchen, and began to head up to her bed. She was more than tired, and she had an early start the next day. But she had barely set foot upon the stair when she heard her friend’s voice. She turned. “Alice? Take this. See if there is anyone that makes your heart leap,” Ellen said as she thrust a copy of the Matrimonial Times at her. “If a promotion doesn’t get your heart racing, maybe it is a new life all together that you need.”
In the privacy of her room, Alice pondered the conversations she had shared with her friend. She had not known just how unhappy she was, how much she felt was missing from her life until they spoke of it. She re-read Maggie’s letter, marveling at the joy and happiness she could hear in every word. She didn’t envy Maggie her happiness, did not begrudge her it in any way – but she did long to have something of her very own. She picked up the newspaper and began to flick through the advertisements. She didn’t think that marriage was the salve for her discomfort, but as Ellen said, it wouldn’t hurt her to explore the possibility.
Many of the men who were in search of wives seemed good and kind, though it was clear why so many more of them had need to advertise. Even in their few words they came across as coarse and unpleasant. But there were at least half a dozen that she thought could be worth corresponding with. Until she read the last advertisement in the entire newspaper, it made her laugh. This was a man who knew his imperfections, and who would accept that a woman would have her own too. She was sure she would like him, and that he was in Montana made her feel reassured. She would have someone to run to, in Maggie, if he turned out to be less than he at first appeared.
A Gentleman of Montana seeks a wife: I have little to offer, a small farm and a lot of hard work. The subscriber seeks a woman to talk with, walk with, share and grow with. If you love music, dancing, and can cook and clean I can offer you nights at the theatre, two left feet and a lot of mess. All responses to be addressed to Box 348, The Matrimonial Times