TO LEIF, who continues to embody the love of God to me every day. I’m the luckiest woman on the planet. Thank you for picking me.
To Mom and Dad, for loving and praying me through the house of horrors.
To Jonathan Merritt, who wrote when I could only weep and turned my mourning into joy. Without you, this book would not be possible.
To Cammy and Jerry Johnson, Coke, Gary, Marj, Hans, Susan, Jens, Cleve, Psalm, Klyr, and Noe Oines, and Doug and Melodee Anderson for all your prayers and love.
To Carol Rykiel, Amy O’Donnell, Dave Terpstra, K. B. Hom, Debra Anderson, Joel, Emily, and Jana Malm, Nancy Franson, Kathy Lawless, Sheila Cowell, Susan St. Onge, Circe Torruellas, Patricia Barnes, Tom and Tara Lantieri, Donna Johnson, and Cherie Lowe, who helped keep me walking every day even when I was tempted to retreat into bed. To Mike and Nan James for mowing the grass and to Marty Rykiel for helping with repairs around the house. To Kara Harrison for going with us on our first visit with The Queen. To Troy and Suzanne Champ and the community of Capital Church who continue to cheer us on, and to Shelley Fliflet for praying then praying some more. To Susan Stanford for all those lovely texts.
To Jessica Johnson, who held everything together with grace and joy. You went above and beyond and were lovely every step of the way. Thank you. To Carrie Lowrie, for all your hard work, grace, and love.
To Janella Griggs, who let me say the unspeakable aloud and loved me through it all. Thank you for embodying joy and being so stinkin’ funny. To Carolyn Haggard, who listened and made me laugh. You are the best kind of medicine for my soul.
To Angela Scheff, for sticking with me through this project. Editors like you only come along once in a lifetime. To Chris and Christy Ferebee, for continuing to call and extend the gift of presence.
To Ron and Susan Pinkston, Christian and Bridget Summers, Mike and Mary Sares, Frank and Naomi Overton for your friendship, love, and support. To Peggy and Louie Locke, for your love and support for so many months. You are extraordinary. To Kendall Parkhurst for dressing me with joy inside and out.
To Tracee Hackel for friendship, laugh-filled e-mails, and manuscript suggestions. To Matthew Paul Turner, Heather Zempel, Maegan Hawley, Margot Starbuck, Craig Blomberg, Byron Borger, Heather Blewett, Emily Hendrickson, Jeana Ledbetter, Janell Anema, Tyler Wigg-Stevenson, Jo Davidson, Patton Dodd, and Cathleen Falsani for kindness, encouragement, and sanding off the rougher edges.
To Taylor and Rebecca Brust, whose generosity was appreciated (and needed).
To Tom Luchin. You went above and beyond time and time again to help us through.
To Ted Cunningham. The kindness you showed us long before the diagnosis helped carry us through this difficult season.
To Hershey. I know you can’t read this, but you were a trooper through all of this. Sorry for not being able to walk you for so long. Thanks for cuddling and being excited to see me on my worst days.
To our medical team. Long live The Queen!
To the Master’s Swimteam at The Ridge in Littleton, Colorado, who baptized us in love and generosity. Thank you for cheering us on in generous and tangible ways. To Darren Carlile and the entire dental staff, who rallied around us with love and support. To Jeremy Williams, whose generosity was an answer to prayer.
To the team at Worthy Publishing. Thank you for being so patient and gracious on the late manuscript. I promise to turn in my doctor’s note soon.
To Ray Johnson and Bayside Church, whose gift will never be forgotten. You’re the only ones who have ever paid me not to speak and stay home and rest. To Kay Warren, who didn’t need to reach out. You didn’t have time. You did it anyway. Thank you.
To Delta Airlines, who showed us abundant grace and mercy during this challenging time. We have stood by you for years, and when we needed you, you stood by us. To the writers and actors on Parenthood season four, your raw storytelling was a gift that helped me catch my breath.
To I Like Giving, who helped us clear our head in the wake of the news. Thanks to Brad Forsma, for your gift and advice.
Thank you for all the kindness and prayers from Mike Stonbraker, Jean and Marc Oplinger, Lauri, Barb, and Sara Bradt, Nesha Vest, Laura Swarny, Tracey Sachman, Gerri Turner, the Catalyst Family, Dan Kimball, Kent Annan and Haiti Partners, James and Teresa Merritt, Charlie Peacock, Rich Van Pelt, Tina Lowry, Terri Spratte, Sherry Martin, Jill Callaghan, Rob and Leah Harter, Alison Hector, Jessie Koch, Andy and Marcia Butcher, Sarah Bowling, The Taylor Family, Matt and Kori Hockett, Gary and Tammy Dunahoo, Laurie Roe, Judy Higginbotham, Rachel Mavis, Donna Kyle, Robin Carlile and Cheryl Hammet, Connie McIntyre, Alisa Laska, Barb Harris, Mary Watkins, Mike Tinnon, Kristy Hatsfelt, Marsha Young, Kristianne Stewart, Laura Schneckers, Sheila and Tony Frost, Cindy Topping, Rob and Ashley Eager, Tim and Julie Clinton, the eWomen Team and AACC, Becka and Paul Burke, The Kinnaman Family, Jerald Nelson, Katherine Pretzler, Scott and Angela Pharr, Amena and Matt Owen, Mike and Deb Wilmot, Tom and Tiene Ruddy, Pat Heggy, Matthew and Jessica Turner, Shane Hipps, Matt Chandler, Donna Wynot, Melinda and Moises Ysagure, Monica and Dave Kirk, Phil and Debbie Waldrep, the Women of Joy team, Shanna Seyer, Jana Reiss, Melissa Leech, Esther and Bob Burroughs, Jinger Sellinger, Erin Bentley, Boyce and Shelly Ingram, Trevor Bron, Barbara Seibert, Angela and David Scheff, The Oas Family, Bill and Kris Zimmerer, The Grant Family, Shelly Miller, Cynthia Smith, Roxanne Nanney, Evan Rosa, Donna Bostick, Kathleen Brooks, Courtney DeFeo, Nicole Hutchinson, Michael Harrison, John and Lisa Carnes, Will Franz, Alicia Roark, Kathi Sturgeon, Thomas and Stacey Coffee, The Maher Family, our friends at The Chapel, Melissa Baldino and the team at America’s Test Kitchen, Leith Anderson, Karen Malzahn and the NAE Staff. And to Jon Stewart, who always provided a good laugh late at night.
Abundant thanks to everyone who sent cards and texts and prayers and video birthday wishes—thank you, thank you, thank you!