“Hermes!” yelled Zeus. “Take Pandora down to earth to see Epi.”

“Aw, Dad! Give me a break!” said Hermes. “I just got here.”

“Hermes . . .” said Zeus in a warning tone.

“All right, all right,” said Hermes.

“Pandora, when you meet Epi, give him the box,” said Zeus. “Say it’s a gift from Zeus. But on your way, don’t open it. Got that?”

Hermes rose from his chair. He activated his helmet and sandal wings and flapped over to Pandora. “Come on, Pandy,” he said. “Let’s go find Epi.”

“Who is Epi?” said Pandora as Hermes tried to escort her from the conference room. “What makes you think that I would enjoy meeting him?”

“Oh, and sweetheart?” Zeus called loudly after Pandora.

Pandora stopped and turned to face him.

“The box!” Zeus called. “Remember, now—don’t open it!”

“Why are you telling me again, Zeus?” asked Pandora.

“Just want to make sure you understand,” he said, winking broadly at the rest of us. “Don’t even lift the lid a teensy bit and peek at what’s inside.”

“Why would I do that, Zeus?” she asked. “Did you not just tell me not to?”

“Go,” said Zeus, shooing her and Hermes away. “Go, go, go.”

Off they went. I supposed they’d ride down to earth in Hermes’s rattletrap bus. Not a great way to make an entrance.

When they had gone, Zeus pumped a fist in the air. “Yes!” he shouted. “Pandora won’t be able to resist opening that box. And even if she does, Epi will open it. Hee-hee! Then Prometheus and those squatty mortals of his will really be in for it!”

“What’s inside the box, Zeus?” said Hera.

Zeus grinned menacingly. “Lots of good stuff.”

“Like what, Dad?” asked Athena.

Now everyone had extreme curiosity. Even me.

“You’ll see.” Zeus was practically glowing with happiness at his latest scheme. He caught my eye and waggled his bushy eyebrows. “Hades? Do you think the curious girl will open the box?”

“You told her not to,” I said. “I don’t think she’ll peek.”

“No-o-o-o-o-o-o!” said Zeus. “She’ll peek! I’ll put money on it!”

I only shrugged.

“You’re smart, Athena,” said Zeus. “What do you think?”

“I’m wise, Dad,” said Athena. “That’s even better than smart. And do I think she’ll open the box? Probably.”

“Yes!” said Zeus. “Everybody else thinks so, too, right?” He looked around the conference room. “Hestia? Po?”

They nodded.

Now Zeus turned back to me. “It’s just you, Hades,” he said. “You’re the only one who thinks she won’t peek. Are you ready to put your money where your mouth is? I’ll bet you she will. I’ll bet however much you say.”

“I don’t want to bet, Zeus,” I said.

“Come on, Hades,” said Zeus. “I’ll put ten million dekadollars on it.”

A dekadollar is worth ten of your mortal dollars. You do the math. We were talking big bucks here.

Zeus was practically jumping up and down, he was so excited. “Take the bet, Hades,” he said. “What are you afraid of? That I’m right? I know I am!”

He kept up his chattering. Finally I held my hand up in surrender.

“Fine, Zeus,” I said. “I’ll take the bet. Ten million dekadollars says she won’t open the box.”

“You’re all witnesses!” Zeus cried to the other gods. “Hades took the bet.” He started laughing again.

My Zeus-tolerance was wearing thin. “If there’s nothing else to take care of here,” I said, “I’ll get back to my kingdom.”

“Bye, Hades!” called Po.

“See you, Hades!” called Hera.

All the other gods and goddesses waved.

I left the conference room. Zeus shouted after me, “So long, sucker!”

Once I was outside the palace, I called for Cerbie.

“That’s my boy!” I said, when he and Demeter’s dog came running. “Tell Sproutsie goodbye.” I picked him up. Shortcut or no shortcut, I didn’t want to walk back to the Underworld, so I chanted the astro-traveling spell. ZIP! I landed at Midas Rent-a-Chariot, not far from the foot of Mount Olympus.

I’d just started off in what passes for a chariot at Midas’s, when I heard the squeal of tires. There was Hermes’s rattling old bus making the last turn down from Mount Olympus. With a screeching of brakes, the bus pulled over to the side of the road. The door opened, and Pandora practically leapt out. She stood beside the bus, holding her box with one hand and her stomach with the other.

“Why did you not slow down when I asked you to, Hermes?” Pandora looked very queasy. “Why did you have to drive so fast and make me feel so sick?”

“Sorry about that,” said Hermes, as he, too, got out of the bus. “Usually, I’m by myself on this road, so I go pretty fast.”

“Can we walk the rest of the way to where we are going, Hermes?” asked Pandora.

“It’s too far,” said Hermes. “Come on, Pandy. Pull yourself together. Get back in the bus so I can take you to Epi’s house.”

“Hermes?” said Pandora. “Did you hear the one about the chicken?”

Pandora was playing for time. She needed help.

Quickly, I pulled my wreck of a chariot into the bushes. I unclipped my Helmet of Darkness from my girdle and put it on. POOF! I disappeared. I made my invisible way over to Pandora and Hermes, figuring I’d know what to do when the time came.

“Get into the bus, Pandora,” Hermes was saying.

“Hermes?” said Pandora. “Do you think Epi has heard the one about the chicken?”

“I wouldn’t know,” Hermes told her. “Get back on the bus, will you?”

I heard footsteps. I turned and saw a stranger approaching. He wore glasses, which was very unusual for those days. He had a big nose and a ratty-looking mustache. He was bigger than a guy. But he didn’t look like a god, either. None of the gods had bad eyesight. None of the gods had big noses or ratty mustaches, either. There was something weird about this stranger. But also something familiar.

The stranger walked up to Pandora. “Hello, there,” he said. “Say, that’s a fine-looking box you’re holding. What’s in it?”

Pandora looked at the stranger curiously. “Are you asking me to open this box?” she said.

“That’s right, sweetheart.” The stranger’s eyes lit up behind his glasses. “Open it.”

Sweetheart?

Suddenly it hit me like a ton of phony noses.

The stranger was Zeus!