DAY 4: SUNDAY

Well, the night started out okay. When Sam and his dad came to pick me up, my family wasn't TOO embarrassing. Except the Fashion Queen came downstairs wearing some stinky new gunpowder perfume.

I told Sam that Cate was trying to impress some guy named Steve. Sam said that her plan might not work, because Cate smelled like rotten eggs.

I don't really think Sam is one to talk, after the milk incident at school. But I let it slide. I've been doing that a lot with him lately.

Things were going pretty much okay until we got to Sam's house near the swamp. That's when three mini slimes bounced out of the house to greet us.

TRIPLETS? As much as Sam talks, you'd think he might have mentioned that he has three little brothers.

Let's just say that I'm not a fan of little kids. They're loud and germy. Those Mini Sams were oozing slime EVERYWHERE. I didn't want to touch anything!

But things got worse when we went inside the house. I smelled it before I saw it—a CAT.

Here's what you should know about me and cats: We do not get along. Not at all.

My friend Cash and I used to fling mushrooms at my neighbor's cat. Well, not AT him—just near him. He's an ocelot that Cash and I nicknamed Sir Coughs-a-Lot, because he's always hacking up hairballs.

Sir Coughs-a-Lot doesn't like me, and I don't like him—that's a fact. We try to stay out of each other's way.

But as soon as I met Sam's cat, I knew it was going to be hard to stay out of her way. "Isn't she pretty?" said Sam, pushing the black-and-white cat toward me. "Her name is Moo. Want to know why?"

I told him I could pretty much guess why.

Then Moo and I started doing this weird dance. She kept trying to rub up against me, but there was NO way that was gonna happen. I dodged her every move.

Sam thought we were really bonding, me and that cat. But it was all I could do not to start hissing at her. (And I am NOT the hissing kind of creeper.)

I finally asked Sam if he wanted to go outside. At least out there, I'd have a chance at losing Moo. Maybe she'd spot something more interesting than ME.

It turns out that Sam lives near some witch huts. Honestly, I was weirded out by those huts. They looked dark and empty. But when Sam said he was friends with one of the witches, I felt better.

Looking back now, I see that Sam was using the word "friend" pretty loosely.

We knocked on the door of a witch hut, and this girl answered. She wore this heavy purple robe, even thought it was super hot out. And she looked kind of familiar.

Sam was like, "Hi, Willow." But she just gave him this spooky stare.

When he said we knew her from school, she was nicer. But when she waved at me, I saw she was holding something slimy. A SPIDER EYE.

She told us she'd been brewing potions, and Sam was like, "Cool!"

That was not the word I would have used—unless "cool" also means "GROSS and COMPLETELY DISGUSTING."

I was pretty much done with this Willow girl, but Sam wanted to stick around. Lucky for me, Willow had a potion brewing in a back room that was going to bubble over or something. She said she had to get back to it. Phew!

As we walked back through the swamp, Sam said we should go home and play with Moo again. I could tell I was going to have to take control of this sleepover. FAST.

"Me and my friend Cash used to make fireworks," I said.

Sam didn't take the bait. But at least he started throwing out other ideas, like jumping on his trampoline.

That sounded better than bonding with Moo. But the trampoline turned out to be MUCH bigger than I thought it would be. I told Sam he could go first.

Now if you've never seen a big green slime bouncing on a big green trampoline, you really should. That slime bounced SO high!

When he came back down from orbit, he offered me a turn. But for some reason, I still wasn't ready. I told him to keep bouncing—that I was working on a rap song in my head.

Sam wanted to help me. So he came up with this goofy rap right there on that trampoline.

I try to be as fair as the next guy, but Sam's rap stunk—REALLY stunk. For starters, it was way too cheerful. Rap songs are supposed to be kind of dark. Plus, his rap didn't make any sense. When I told him that, he just smiled and added a couple more lines.

I figured there was only one way to put an end to Sam's rap. I asked him if I could take a turn on the trampoline.

He bounced right off, and I climbed on.

I've gotta say, bouncing on a slime trampoline is pretty fun. I bounced higher, and higher, and higher.

Pretty soon, I had a goofy grin on my face, just like Sam's. I was sure glad there was no one else around to see me.

We stayed on that trampoline until the sun started to rise. I waited for someone to call us inside, but they didn't. Sam's parents must have been too busy putting those mini slimes to bed. So my plan was working!

The sun was over the trees by the time we finally went in the house. All that bouncing made me forget about school and my itchiness. And I'm pretty sure I fell asleep with a grin on my face.

But it sure didn't last long. I woke up this afternoon with a cat on my head. ON. MY. HEAD.

There's so much wrong with that picture that I don't even want to talk about it. I'm still spitting out hairballs.

So next time? I'm going to suggest that Sam sleeps at my house, Evil Twin or no Evil Twin. A creeper has his limits.