Dear Alice,

You’ll believe anything if you think that! Besides, I’ve studied my fish VERY carefully and it’s definitely a ZOMBIE. If you don’t know much about zombies, these are the top three things to look out for:

1. Always in a bad mood.

2. Always doing things they’re not allowed to do and going places they’re not allowed to go.

3. Very messy-looking.

Oh, plus one more …

4. Always trying to eat brains.

Yours in detail

Captain Jimmy Cook