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The rest of the weekend was depressing. I sulked around the house. I helped my dad set up his new printer in the basement office, and I baked casseroles with my mom. Everyone was extra quiet and broody.
Officer Russell called to inform us that there wouldn’t be an official police report about my presence at the party. There was no actual evidence to document, and since I hadn’t stayed or drank anything, I was essentially let off the hook, at least, as far as the police were concerned.
Matilda slipped up to my room only once, just to let me know that she would be steering clear until Monday morning, when my parents would have to give me a little breathing room to get ready for school. She seemed a little wigged out by their extra attention. Her parents hadn’t spared her that kind of time whenever she had screwed up.
The weekend seemed to go on forever. I didn’t have things like my phone or the television as distractions, so every minute was painfully accounted for. I wondered if the Ds had texted or called. I wondered if Wayne’s dad had told him about Benny and if he would tell everyone at school. I did all of my homework and checked it twice. Then I wrote two papers that weren’t due for another month. I even found time to slip in a novel I’d been wanting to read since Christmas. For a few short hours, I was able to forget all the ways my life was spiraling out of control.
When Monday morning did finally arrive, my sulking gave way to desperation. Matilda gave me a quick lesson in trickery. We emptied out an old zippered pencil bag and packed my makeup essentials inside, along with a pair of hooped earrings. Then I slipped a hoodie over the new green blouse I had hidden in the back of my closet. My skinny jeans and boots were mild enough to go unnoticed. Matilda slipped a bottle of baby oil and a few cotton swabs down in my bag before I left, for quick makeup removal after school.
When my mom dropped me off, I went directly to my locker and stripped out of the hoodie. I put in the hoop earrings on the way to the girls’ bathroom. The Ds were already waiting for me. They looked more polished than usual, probably to compensate for the gossip Amanda had surely spread about the legitimacy of my Friday night date with a college boy.
“Late start this morning?” Denise asked, passing me her cigarette. I took a long drag and handed it back before fishing my makeup out of my bag.
“What a weekend. I hope your party was better than my date,” I said, leaning over the sink to brush on some eye shadow in the mirror.
“It was so lame,” Danielle whined. “It would have been better if you were there.”
Denise glared at her before turning back to look at me in the mirror. “Mitch got drunk and fell in the water. Then he chased us around the park like an idiot. How was your date?” she asked, twirling a golden curl between her fingers.
I rolled my eyes. “Well, first he took me to a cheap restaurant. Then he ordered without asking me what I wanted, which he did again when we went out for ice cream afterwards. I swear, I almost dumped him right then and there.” I tried not to smile as the memory of mine and Benny’s performance came back.
“You totally should have,” Danielle said, taking the cigarette from Denise.
I shrugged and finished my eye makeup off with a coat of mascara. I only had enough time left to slick on some lip gloss before the first bell rang, but I was polished enough for the Ds to be seen with.
Denise and I said goodbye to Danielle and made our way to Mr. Hammond’s English class. I saw Chloe at her locker as we passed by, but quickly looked away. Denise noticed her too and stuck her nose up in the air. She was so engrossed in her snobbery that she bumped right into Eddie Paris as he stepped into our path.
“Janie, I need to talk to you,” he said, clutching the strap of his backpack over one shoulder.
Denise snorted and walked around him. She stopped when I didn’t follow and turned back, narrowing her eyes at me. “You’re not really going to talk to him, are you?”
“No,” I blurted, trying to step around Eddie too, but he stepped in front of me again.
“It’s really important,” he whispered.
“I somehow doubt it.” My rudeness shocked him enough that I was able to dodge around him and catch up with Denise.
“What a creeper,” she said under her breath.
I gave a small laugh and looked back at Eddie. I hoped he knew how sorry I was, but then again, it was probably best if he didn’t. I didn’t want to have to be mean to him in front of the Ds, but I would be. My entire life was at stake. Being mean was better than being committed.
The day was slow and predictable. No one said anything about my date being my cousin, so I assumed that either Officer Russell hadn’t told Wayne, or else Wayne was still my friend and not out to destroy me.
I thought that I might have my answer by lunch, but our table was too crowded for Wayne and me to have a private conversation. Instead, we stared each other down from across the table.
Eddie had been bumped down to the opposite end from us by a trio of cheerleaders led by Amanda Hughes.
“Your boyfriend is kind of a jerk,” she said by way of small talk.
“Yeah, I suppose he is.” I had the feeling that she was probably looking for more than that, but I just couldn’t give it to her with Wayne sitting right in front of me. Amanda shrugged and went back to talking to Mitch about how mad she was that he hadn’t invited her to the party.
Wayne was quiet all through lunch, until I went to dump my tray. He followed me to the trash cans, nudging in close to my shoulder. “I know that was your cousin Benny.”
My cheeks burned, and I was suddenly sorry that I hadn’t had time to apply the rest of my makeup that morning. “My date bailed. Benny came down to cheer me up. So what if everyone thinks he’s my boyfriend?”
“You didn’t really have a date, did you?” Wayne grinned at me.
“Wayne, what do you want?”
His brow furrowed as he took my tray and set it down on top of his. He took me by the arm and pulled me out of the cafeteria and into the hall. “I want to know what happened between our kiss and now. I thought you liked me, and now you’re giving me the brushoff like Denise does with Mitch all the time. What gives?”
I licked my lips and pressed them together. “I do like you,” I admitted. “I’m just really confused right now. There’s a lot going on that I can’t explain, and it’s killing me.”
“Yeah, well it’s killing me too. Let me know when you figure it out.” He turned to go back in the cafeteria, but then stopped and turned back around. “And for the record, the Ds would be just as impressed if you were dating me instead of some fake college guy.”
My heart ached and my head throbbed. I began having doubts about my priorities. Maybe it would be okay if Officer Russell found Matilda in my room. Maybe I could convince him that someone had framed me. Maybe being put in a straightjacket wouldn’t be so bad, as long as I got to watch them put her back, six feet under where she belonged.
The garbage disposal wasn’t entirely out of the question yet, but it seemed more and more farfetched the longer Matilda hung around. It would have been easier if she had been a drooling, stumbling, mindless cliché of a zombie, but she wasn’t. She was still evil though, even if it was just run of the mill high school evil.
I was trying to decide if I should follow Wayne back to the cafeteria, when Eddie pushed open the door and slammed it into my elbow. “Ow!”
“Sorry, I, sorry,” he stammered. “I really need to talk to you.”
“Now really isn’t a good time, Eddie.” I reached for the cafeteria door, but he slapped his hand against it, holding it shut.
“It’s really important, Janie.”
“What?” I snapped.
Eddie jumped and took his hand back, rubbing it over his face. He shifted from one foot to the other and then tapped one of his worn sneakers on the floor, squeaking it against the linoleum. “You know that hair you gave me a while back?”
I rolled my eyes and sighed. “Seriously? This big important thing you need to talk to me about is a hairball?”
“No. Well, yes. Sort of.” His brows crinkled up and he gave me a pained half smile. The bell rang, signaling the end of lunch and fourth period.
“I don’t have time for this, Eddie.” I turned to head for my locker. Eddie followed me down the hall.
“Wait! I just wanted to ask if you had a date for prom yet.”
I laughed. “And you thought you’d warm me up by reminding me of what a weirdo you are. Is that it?”
“No, I just.” He blew out a frustrated sigh. “I’m not good at this. The point I was trying to make is that I’ve done a lot of stupid things trying to get your attention.”
“You don’t say.” I frowned at him and glanced back at the cafeteria doors as they opened. A swarm of students filtered into the hallway. It was only a matter of time before someone like Amanda Hughes would notice me talking to Eddie and pass it along to the Ds.
Eddie took my hand, drawing my attention back to him. “I’m done with the smoke and mirrors. I’m putting myself out here for real this time. I like you, Janie. A lot. I know it’s early, but I was afraid someone else would beat me to it. So I’m asking now. Will you be my date for prom?”
My heart fluttered. I hadn’t seen the question coming, and I really hadn’t expected my reaction. Eddie’s dark eyes searched mine, but I was too far gone. I had to make it out of this mess I was in, and now he was just a bump in the road. Maybe he’d forgive me someday. Maybe I would even forgive myself, but it was doubtful.
“I can’t,” I said softly, pulling my hand out of his. “It would ruin everything.”
Eddie’s hopeful expression melted. He cleared his throat and straightened his shoulders. “Sure. I get it. Catch you around.” He turned and dodged the lunch crowd, taking the stairs up to the second floor.
Denise was suddenly beside me. I hadn’t seen her come out of study hall. “Is that creeper still following you around?” She raised an eyebrow and looped her arm through mine. “Come on. Let’s go smoke with Danielle,” she said, tugging me towards the bathroom.
Danielle had already lit a menthol cigarette by the time we joined her. She passed it to me first, earning a sour look from Denise. Danielle stuck her tongue out.
Denise turned her nose up and pulled a fingernail file out of her purse. “Mrs. Walters is setting up the prom committee next week. I heard her talking about it to that crazy girl you used hang out with, Janie.”
I cringed at the mention of Chloe, but I played along to save face. “Who?”
Denise took the cigarette from me. “You know,” she sighed. “Lancelot’s girlfriend.”
“Oh. Right.” I pulled myself up to sit on the counter next to Danielle. The spot was normally reserved for Denise, but I pretended not to notice her scowling. “I really hope we don’t end up with some lame theme, like eighties flashback or disco,” I said.
Danielle stifled a laugh. “I told you disco was super lame.” Denise’s ears turned pink, and she flicked the lit cigarette at her. “Hey!” She swatted it into the sink.
“Do you have a better idea?” Denise turned to me and placed both fists on her hips.
I paused to feign deep thought for a moment. “We should do a masquerade ball theme. Like from that movie The Labyrinth. It was set in the eighties, so you could even have those big dorky sleeves if you want them so bad.” I gave her a vicious grin.
“Ohhhh,” Danielle cooed. “That would be so much fun!”
Denise shot her another disgusted look, and then rotated it to catch us both in the radiation of her foul mood swing. “I don’t know. That sounds pretty lame to me. Besides, I’m too pretty to wear a mask all night.”
I snorted. “I was thinking it might be an improvement. Especially if you plan on pouting the whole time.” I hopped off the sink and left the bathroom before she could think of a comeback.
The jab seemed a little extra callous, considering how chummy we had become lately. I guess it was in part due to my frazzled nerves over the conversation with Eddie. Of course, Danielle was still in my corner. The Ds would definitely be bickering about their split interests in me soon. It would be a new power play between them, but since I was the shiny new feature of Jasper High’s popular inner circle, Denise would have to relent. Besides, she wouldn’t want to risk upsetting me to the point that I would go on a date with Mitch Brown.
I was beginning to see the how and why of their constant drama. It was exhausting, and yet somehow, oddly stimulating. Admitting that to myself made me feel like a bad person. Then I thought of Wayne, Eddie, and Chloe. I was a bad person. No. I was a good person, pretending to be a bad person, so that I wouldn’t be framed as an extra bad person, before getting the chance to be a good person again. I shook my head to uncross my eyes and went to class.