KATE: Thursday evening,
eighteen days after the split
‘Sit down. Let me get that for you.’
Kate jumps up to snatch the kettle out of Mel’s hand.
Mel doesn’t bother to protest.
‘Thanks,’ she says, shuffling back to her chair, where she drops down with a sigh.
‘They said those would get easier in time, but I still can’t get the hang of them.’ She is pointing to the crutches which lean up against the table in her cosy kitchen.
It is three days after the accident and Mel is trying to put on a brave face, but Kate can see how shaken she still is. They have known each other too long to hide things from each other.
‘You still having flashbacks?’ she asks.
Mel nods. ‘Every time I close my eyes I’m back there at the bus stop. Feeling myself falling. Hearing the screech of the brakes. You know, if that driver had been going any faster, I’d be dead. That’s what the police said. He wouldn’t have been able to stop in time and I’d have gone under the wheels.’
As it was, the bus had almost stopped by the time it hit her. Even so, she was still thrown several feet, landing with her right leg bent underneath her.
‘I’ve been saying for ages that it’s an accident waiting to happen, that bus stop,’ says Kate. ‘The pavement is way too narrow. And when there’s a gap between buses, it gets really crowded. Especially at rush hour.’
‘That’s what the policeman said. He said you couldn’t blame the people behind me because they were also being pushed. There’s going to be an official investigation. To stop it happening to some other poor bugger.’
‘But are you OK? You still don’t seem to be back to your old self.’
‘I’ll live. And what about you, Kate? You haven’t ended up back in bed with Jack again, I hope.’
‘No way. That was a one-off.’
‘And Tom?’
Kate shakes her head. ‘To be honest, Mel, your accident shook me up so much I haven’t wanted to do anything except stay home and cuddle the kids. I’m still not sleeping well. My nerves are on edge. And the bloody squirrels in the roof don’t help much. As soon as I get paid, I’m going to get those sorted out. Do you know, I can’t wait for term to be over so I can get away with Ben and Amy and relax properly.’
She looks at her phone.
‘Shit. I have to go. I’m meeting Jack at the counsellor’s in twenty minutes.’
‘I don’t know why you still bother going to see her. It’s over, isn’t it? What’s the point?’
‘Jack is still Ben and Amy’s dad. It’s important to try to get on with him. And I don’t want to make an enemy of him. You know how he can be. There’s still so much to sort out. Like where he’s going to live. He can’t go on kipping at his mate’s for ever, but he goes crazy if I suggest he rents a room in a flat. I’m scared he’s going to try to force me to sell the house.’
‘He can’t do that. Not if you have custody of the kids.’
‘I wouldn’t put it past him to go for custody himself. He keeps threatening to.’
‘They’d laugh him out of the court room,’ says Mel. ‘He has never been hands-on with them. Not even when they were young. He wouldn’t recognize a nappy if you slapped him around the face with one.’
‘Still, I’ve got to keep on his good side, if I can. For the kids’ sake.’
As she makes her way to Julie’s house, Kate can’t shake off a feeling of dread. What happened to Mel has upset her more than she has let on. What if she had died? The thing is, you never know, do you, when the end might come? It is so important to do the right thing. Make the right choices.
She is late getting to Julie’s and Jack is already there, with a face like thunder. She hasn’t even sat down before he starts. On and on about her having a lover. Why is he so fixated on that? He can’t possibly know about Tom. She has been so careful.
‘You really need to let this go. It is holding you back,’ Julie tells Jack. Her voice is gentle, but Kate feels Jack grow tense on the sofa beside her.
Afterwards, she will wonder what made her speak out. Perhaps it is to do with Mel and doing the right thing while there is still time. Or perhaps she just feels sorry for Jack, who is still her husband, after all.
‘Jack is right. Well, almost right,’ she says to Julie. ‘There was another man who paid me attention, and I was tempted. But I didn’t do it.’
‘Oh,’ says Julie, giving her a cross-eyed stare. ‘So it wasn’t all in Jack’s head?’
‘No. Well, not all of it,’ says Kate, wishing now that she had never said anything. ‘Like I said, nothing happened.’
‘And it’s over now?’
‘Yes,’ says Kate firmly.
To her left, she hears Jack let out a deep breath.
‘You know coming to see me only works if you are willing to be completely honest, Kate,’ says Julie. ‘Otherwise, it’s a waste of all our time.’
It is too much for Kate. The worry about Mel, the fights with Jack and now the counsellor telling her off. She bursts into tears.
‘I’m sorry,’ she says, wiping her eyes with a tissue from the box on the table in front of her. ‘My best friend has been in an accident, so I am very emotional at the moment.’
‘I am so sorry to hear that,’ says Julie.
‘Me, too,’ says Jack. He reaches out and puts his hand on hers. ‘Mel and I might not see eye to eye on things, but I was really shocked when Amy told me what happened.’
After the counselling, Kate is still upset and Jack insists on driving her home.
‘I meant what I said in there,’ he says when they are in the car. ‘I’m glad Mel is OK.’
Kate feels something inside her give way. She has been too hard on Jack. He is still the man she fell in love with. Still soft when it comes to her. When they pull up outside the house, she lets him put his arms around her. She leans her head against his chest.
‘Did you mean it about that bloke?’ he whispers. ‘That it’s over?’
She nods, her cheek brushing against his jumper.
And, just for that moment, it is true.