Chapter 2

Present Day - April 1995

Throwing Shade

Spinx slid coolly out the Benz to greet his fans. Everyone began to crowd around to get a closer look at the shiny blue car. The attention made Spinx beam with pride. The people in the hood made him feel like a celebrity. He tilted his shades and lightly leaned against the car. He was careful not to leave any dents or smudges. He was in his glory.

I sat in the passenger seat with a smug look, sulking over Meekie's comment. I turned my head and looked the other way, disgusted. I couldn’t even pull myself together to be by my man’s side. That bitch just ruined my day. She really knew how to make my skin boil. She wouldn't have bothered me so much if I’d never caught her sucking my man off. I saw that shit with my own two eyeballs.

 

A couple of months ago I was coming home from a track meet. I had on my grey and blue Wilson High Track Team jogging suit, looking cute as always. My team came in first place, and I wanted to show Spinx my trophy. I knocked on the door, but there was no answer. After turning the door knob I discovered that the door was unlocked. I went straight upstairs to our bedroom and got the surprise of my life.

The door was wide open. The first thing I saw was Spinx’s bare, black ass, with his jeans around his ankles. I just stood there for about thirty seconds with my jaw dropped. I was really pissed when I noticed nasty ass Meekie on her knees slobbing on dick that belonged to me. I hauled off and threw my trophy, aiming directly at Meekie’s head. Unfortunately, I missed. Instead it went crashing into several cologne bottles on the dresser. It was enough to get their attention.

“What the Fu-,” Spinx noticed my reflection in the mirror and quickly snatched his dick out of her mouth. “Nyse… damn…. Yo, this ain’t what you think!”

I was on fire. If I had a blade I would have cut his ass. “What the fuck you mean it ain’t what I think? You got your little black dick all up in her mouth, Spinx. You can’t lie… I saw it with my own eyes!” I yelled.

Meekie was still on her knees with a grimace on her face. “Look, I ain’t got time for this shit. We can either handle this now, or you can stop over later and we can finish up. Either way I need my shit now.” She rose from the floor and held her hand out to Spinx.

In my mind I just kept thinking no the fuck she didn’t just say they could finish. “Bitch, he ain’t coming to your trifling ass house to finish nothing! You better get the fuck out before I fuck your old ass up!” I snapped.

Meekie was older than me, but I was damned if she was gonna just play me like I didn’t matter. She didn’t even look my way. Spinx dug into his pocket and handed her a little blue bag. She took it and strutted pass me as she went out the door. I looked at Spinx in confusion.

“I told you it wasn’t what you thought. She needed a hit and ain’t have no money. You act like I was making love to the bitch! You need to grow the fuck up, Nyse. You know what I do to make money for us, so get the fuck over it!” he said.

 

That was months ago, and it still bothered me like it was yesterday. No sorry; Nyce, I’ll never do it again. Nothing.

Just as I was starting to get deep into my pity party, I noticed my girl Kee wobbling towards me in the side-mirror. She had on a pair of navy leggings, an oversized red and blue Gap T-shirt and a pair of white Reebok classics. Her hair was in her infamous rod curled weave pony tail with ocean waves in the front. I hurried and threw a smile on my face. There was no way I could let her see me upset.

That was the hard thing about being Spinx’s woman. I had to make everyone out there think that everything was all beautiful, even if it wasn’t. I refused for some bitch to think she even had a chance of taking my spot. It just wasn’t going to happen. I was here to stay.

Kee stopped on the side of the car. She took a good look at the car and then stared me up and down before she spoke, “Hey, girl, I see you glossin’ in that ride.”

Her words were stale and her expression was vague. My smile faded slowly. Lately I had been a little suspicious about Kee’s true feelings about me. Over the years she seemed to have distanced herself from me. At first I thought it was because she was busy playing house with Bo. I confronted her about it one day and she had the nerve to say I had changed. She said I was starting to act like Kat. I was a little upset that she had the audacity to say something so harsh. I was nothing like her. My sister was mean and treated people like they were beneath her. I was nothing like that. No. Not me.

I knew Kee didn’t really mean that. I still believed something else was bothering her. I just didn’t know what it was. I just hoped it wasn’t a bit of envy. I loved Kee like a sister, and she was my only true friend. I would’ve hated to have to cut her off. I mean, she’s the one who introduced me to Spinx. If it wasn’t for her I wouldn’t be with him to this day.

I ignored the thought and tilted my shades downward. “You see me, bitch,” I said jokingly.

Silence.

I decided to change the subject. “Look at your damn belly... you look like you about to drop that load any minute,” I said with enthusiasm.

Her face lit up when I spoke about the pregnancy. Kee was on her second baby. She already had a little girl named Myai by Bo; she was about seven months old. I went off on her when I found out that she was knocked again. I thought Bo was trying to trap her by keeping her barefoot and pregnant. He had a hold over her mind. She did whatever he wanted, and I didn’t like it one bit.

For a minute I thought he was beating on her; when her looks began to fade. She was once a radiant black beauty, with flawless dark chocolate skin, almond shaped eyes and a sharp defined bone structure. Barbizon Modeling School material, and that was something to be proud of, especially if you were a female of color. You had to be something special for them to want you.

Last year she was offered a scholarship to their program. She was so excited, but was shot down by Bo. She was still going to go despite how he felt. Unfortunately, a few weeks before it was time for her to start she found out she was pregnant. I swear he knocked her up on purpose. This time around she dropped out of school and everything. She got a Section 8 voucher and moved into the apartments across the highway with Bo. After watching her life spiral downward, I was just happy I had never got knocked up. It wasn't like I was protecting myself or anything. I guess I was just lucky.

“So whatcha ready to get into?” I asked her.

“I’m ready to go down the Hill and drop this shit off to this fiend.”

My jaw dropped. That’s the type of shit I was talking about. She was in no condition to making any runs. I tried to hide my anger. “I know you ain't walking?”

She rolled her eyes and shifted her weight to the left. The oversized Guess bag was weighing her down. “How else do you think I’m supposed to get there? It ain't like you can take me!” she snapped.

I could tell in her voice that I was testing her patience. She looked exhausted. I held up my finger, as to say wait a second. I opened the car door and scooted pass her, bumping her stomach. I quickly apologized and walked over to Spinx, who was entertaining his adoring fans. I rubbed his shoulder and whispered in his ear softly. I was asking if we could drop Kee off down the Hill. When I was finished I gave him a pleading look while stroking his hand.

He kissed me on the cheek and whispered back, “Baby, don’t you see that I’m busy right now? I’m not going anywhere and neither are you.” He turned his attention back to his fans and continued his conversation like I wasn’t even there.

I looked around and notice a few people staring at me like they were trying to figure out what was said. I usually didn’t act out, but I was vexed. I looked over at Kee and she gave me a look as to say, I told you so. I took a few deep breaths. I had to get myself prepared for what I was about to do. Once I got enough nerve I jumped in front of Spinx and yelled in his face.

“Why you frontin’ on my girl Kee? She’s knocked by your boy and you can't take her down the Hill? That's fucked up!”

Everything went silent around me. It was so quiet that you could hear a knat piss on cotton. A sick feeling instantly came over me; I knew I had fucked up. I looked around at my surroundings. I noticed a few people snickering and a few with their hands over their mouths in awe. His cool demeanor quickly changed. His eyes widened in shock. Then it happened.

“Bitch, what the fuck you just say!?” he instantly grabbed me by the arm and led me across the street.

My stomach was doing flips. I was afraid of what he might do, but I refused to let him know it. Once we made it across the street he began to shake me like a rag doll. I tried to get him off of me, but his grip was too strong.

“Are you fucking crazy? I should slap the shit out your ass for trying to play in front of my peoples. Fuck that bitch… she got two fucking legs, she can walk.”

He raised his hand like he was about to slap me. I knew better. This was just a show. He swore he would never put his hands on me. This was all an act to fluff up his ego. But little did he know I had a point to make, too. The hell if I was gonna go out like those other chicks that let niggas beat them down in the street.

“Ok, Spinx, you made your point. Your fans see that you have me in check, now get the fuck off me,” I said with my teeth clenched.

He let go of my arm. I backed away from him and glared. We were both breathing

heavy and staring each other down like we were in a draw. I looked across the street and noticed people whispering to one another, pointing in our direction. I was swole. First this bastard disrespected my ace, and he had the nerve to put his hands on me and call me out my name in public. I began to make my way back towards the crowd. He ran behind me trying to grab me. I pulled away and picked up my pace. I heard him in the background calling my name.

“Nyse!”

I didn’t even look back.

“Yo, Nyse, you know you fuckin’ hear me!”

I could tell that he was embarrassed by my blatant disrespect. But fuck him. Alls he had to do was take us down the Hill, but no, he wanted to show out in front of his flunkies, I thought. I walked past his peoples and flashed them my award winning smile. The hell if I was going to give them any type of satisfaction of seeing me distraught. Far as they knew I had that nigga eating out the palm of my hands. And that was the way it was going to stay.

I went over to Kee and took the Guess bag off her shoulder. She had a confused look on her face. I gave her a sneaky grin and she smiled back. I noticed a big rock sitting on the ground. I grabbed her hand so we could start our journey down the Hill. Just before we left I picked up the rock and threw it at the windshield and we ran.

Spinx was heated at this point. “Nalyse, you stupid bitch! I’m gonna kick your fucking yella ass!” he yelled.

Wow he called me by my name… he’s really pissed, I thought. I laughed at him and kept it moving. He stood next to Gizz who was shaking his head trying hard not to laugh at his boy. I stopped in the middle of the path, turned slowly in his direction, smirked and gave him the finger.

I could hear people saying, “Oh shit, Nyse is crazy… oh my God!” Some people even had the nerve to laugh. I know he felt some type of way.

Later on I found out some new cat who obviously didn’t know any better came out his mouth sideways and said, “Man, fuck her, Spinx. She ain’t nuffin’ but some young, dumb, pussy anyway.” The fool thought that he was cool and tried to give Spinx some dap, like what he said about me gave him some brownie points. Little did he know he just earned himself a beat down that he would never forget.

Spinx acted like he was gonna give him a pound. As soon as he came close enough, he two pieced him, causing him to hit the ground hard. On cue the young boys commenced to stomping a mud hole in him.

I laughed when I heard the story. That's what his dumb ass gets. It didn't matter how mad Spinx got at me, no one could disrespect me or talk dirty about me. Especially not in his presence, because they were going to get dealt with.

 

++++++++

 

Later that night my pager was blowing up. I lay on my bed listening to the Nine at Nine Countdown on Power 99FM. “Weak,” by SWV, was the number six song. That was my shit right there. I rolled over to my nightstand and picked up my clear pink Motorola pager. I laughed to myself. It wasn't anybody but Spinx. He left little codes saying I love you and then he hit me with the sixty-nine. Hmphh… not tonight, I sang to myself. I put the pager on vibrate and sat it on top of my nightstand. I grabbed my head scarf from the bottom of my antique white canopy bed and went to the bathroom to wrap my hair for school tomorrow.

I was so glad I only had a month and half of that shit to go. I would graduate in June, most likely with honors. No matter how much shit I got into with Spinx; I didn’t let my grades slip. I wanted to go to a prestigious university and study law. It was always my dream to be a defense attorney like Johnny Cochran.

I talked to Spinx about going away to school, but he wasn’t having it. He said I’d better carry my ass to Widener University and enroll in their law program. They had a campus in Wilmington, not far from the Concord Mall. I wasn’t about to go to that school. I figured that I would most likely go to the University of Delaware, where my sister attended. I would stay for one year and then transfer to Georgetown. That would give me time to work on him and save some money.

I tied the scarf tightly around my head and then turned on the water to brush my teeth. In the midst of brushing I heard my mom laughing and talking to someone downstairs. I quickly turned the water off and stood quietly, trying to eaves drop on her conversation. I heard Kat’s whiny voice complaining about something. I rolled my eyes and shook my head.

“Why is this chick here?” I sighed.

I didn’t feel like dealing with her ass, so I was going to go to bed. Then I thought about it, she always found ways to try and make me feel inadequate. I was gonna go down there and tell her about my man’s new SL500. A feeling of pride came over me. I practically ran down the steps.

When I came to the last few steps I played it off like I was going to the kitchen. I floated past the den and stopped at the door. She was complaining about an oil change or something that had to do with her piece of shit car. Well, it wasn't really a piece of shit, it was 1994 Lexus GS300, but I wasn’t moved by it. I came in and sat on the couch next to my mother and gave my sister a big grin.

She turned her attention from my mother and focused it on me. “What's up, trixie? Why you smiling all big?” she asked.

She crossed her legs and sat back on the love seat. She took her manicured hands and fluffed her sandy brown shoulder length hair. She wore a little black Chanel dress, with T-strap designer stiletto heels. I never understood why she dressed like that all the time. It’s not like she had a job or did anything of importance. My face was frowned up and I felt my chest tighten. She makes me sick, I thought. I guess my mom could feel the tension. She excused herself and went into the kitchen to start dinner.

I waited until she was out of sight and whispered, “You know we got a Mercedes SL500?” I gloated.

Kat laughed at my comment like it was some type of joke. I refused to let her ruin my fun. So I continued to smile despite her negativity.

“We... who is we? Is your name on that car, and are you talking about Bank’s baby blue Mercedes?” she questioned.

Banks? What did she mean by that? Spinx told me he bought that car straight off the lot, I thought. I tried not to show my confusion. “No, my name is not on the car and it doesn't have to be. And what you mean Banks Mercedes? That's not his car!” I was getting annoyed. She was really starting to piss me off and I couldn’t hide it.

She stood up and folded her arms and began to pace the floor. Her heels clicked against the cherry hardwood floors. She stood in front of me looking down on me and began her usual lecture. “Damn, Nalyse. I really thought you would have learned by now. That nigga is not gettin’ it like that... he runs a fucking development. He is not a boss. Now if you want to run with a thoroughbred you need to get with Brock, that nigga been on you for years. He's younger than your so called man and has more money stacked than that nigga will ever see.” She shook her head in disappointment and pulled out a phone from her Chanel bag.

 I guess this bitch gonna pull out her phone to rub it in my face, I thought. “Who are you calling?” I demanded.

She was standing by the window pressing numbers and peaking out the blinds. By the way she was acting you would have thought she was expecting someone.

“I'm checking my messages... if you don't mind. I can’t believe you’re sitting here hyped about his bootleg car. You need to ask him to get you one. You are ready to graduate. See where his head is at. See if he got enough to get you your own whip.” She opened the blinds and lifted them and pointed to her Lexus. “You see that shit right there; parked out front? That's my shit, in my name, that Rashawn bought me. And I didn't even ask for it, he just did it. You betta drop that whack nigga.” She shut the blinds and rolled her eyes at me. As she walked pass me I heard her whisper, “Dumb broad.”

I sat there feeling stupid. I wish I had just gone to bed instead of dealing with her. My eyes were stinging and I felt a lump in my throat. “Fuck this shit,” I said to myself, fighting back tears. Who does she think she is? Even though I hate to admit it, she did have a point. Maybe I should ask for my own whip, I thought. She had a cell phone. I didn't even have one of those. I just had my pager.

Ra-Ra did keep my sister fly and he was paying for her education. I was going to ask Spinx what his plans were for my graduation. I tried to beat the feeling of inadequacy that was submerging my mind as I walked back to my bedroom. I closed my door and turned out the light and listened to the Quiet Storm. My last thought before I drifted off to sleep was he’ll pay for my tuition. I mean, he is my man....