Feasts and Treats
Wait! Don’t turn the page! I know what you are: you’re a One Dish Witch and you’re used to paging swiftly past the “Feasts and Treats” section of this almanac because you simply don’t have time to cook. Thirty-minute meals are no help to you: you barely have thirty minutes to eat a meal, let alone prepare one, which is why none of this year’s recipes are meant to keep you imprisoned in the kitchen for very long (except Ostara’s Simnel Cake and Mabon’s Chrysanthemum Tartlets). Many of the entrees require only one pot to cut down on the washing up.
No one did Halloween better than the Aztecs, whose autumnal Day of the Dead festivities thrive in modern Mexico as well as the American Southwest. Accordingly, I’ve chosen a Latin American theme for this year’s Samhain menu, the first dish dedicated to Mexico’s most famous ghost, La Llorona, or “the weeping woman.”
I was introduced to the legend of La Llorona while I was living in Santa Fe, New Mexico. According to the version I heard, La Llorona drowned her two children in a river so she might be free to run away with a handsome Spanish soldier. The soldier soon spurned her, and the repentant mother has been haunting riverbanks in search of her lost children ever since. You’ll know she’s around when you hear the sound of inconsolable weeping. La Llorona is usually portrayed with a cascading black lace mantilla and, of course, a sodden handkerchief.
If there’s a lesson to be learned from her story, it might be this: if La Llorona had had canned goods and cake mixes available to her, maybe she wouldn’t have burned out on housekeeping in the first place!
Posole á La Llorona
No humans were harmed in the development of this recipe. But they might have been. I have heard that the original Aztec posole, a stew of parched corn, chilies, and meat, was originally made with human meat—the flesh of prisoners of war—and consumed in a ritual context. I have also heard that it’s a popular cure for a New Year’s Day hangover. Since Samhain is the Witches’ New Year, I figured there’s no better dish to keep warming on the stove throughout this sabbat. I’m sure La Llorona would have enjoyed cooking posole for her children before things went so terribly wrong.
Prep time: 25 minutes
Cook time: 45 minutes
Servings: 8
In the pot:
1 garlic clove, minced
½ small yellow onion, chopped
2 tablespoons olive oil
½ pound boneless pork rib meat or boneless pork chops, cut into half-inch cubes
Modest dash salt
Dash black pepper
¼ teaspoon ground chipotle chili
1 teaspoon curry powder
2 cups water
1 5.5-ounce can tomato juice
1 6-gram cube chicken bouillon
2 15-ounce cans white hominy, rinsed and drained (This is the posole or parched corn, but the can will probably say “hominy.”)
1 4.25-ounce can diced green chilies
Toppings:
1 small lime
Grated Monterey Jack or Mexican blend cheese
Chopped fresh cilantro leaves
In a large, heavy pot, sauté garlic and onion in olive oil. Add pork and seasonings and sauté until meat cubes are browned on all sides. Add water and tomato juice. Bring to boil, add bouillon cube, and then turn down to simmer. Add hominy and green chilies and let simmer uncovered 45 minutes, stirring occasionally.
Not salty enough? Ask La Llorona to weep a little into the pot when she passes through the kitchen.
Before serving, top each bowl with a squirt of lime, cilantro, and grated cheese.
Horchata
Posole and chocolate cake would be impossible without corn, chilies, and chocolate—all crops native to Central America. The following recipe, however, originated in Spain. Horchata varies throughout Latin America, but as far as I know they are all rice-based. Mexican horchata always seems to contain cinnamon.
Having tried to do it myself and found it very messy, I think the real reason La Llorona weeps is because she had to pound, soak, and strain the rice to make horchata. Now there is an easier way!
Prep time: 5 minutes
Chill time: 2 hours
Servings: 6–8
½ cup sugar
2 cups plain unsweetened rice milk
2 cups plain unsweetened almond milk
½ teaspoon vanilla
¼ teaspoon cinnamon
Zest of ½ small lime (The zest is the green part of the peel which you can grate off with a cheese grater.)
Large jar with tight-fitting lid, or blender pitcher
Put all ingredients in jar or blender. Secure lid tightly and shake or blend vigorously. Chill for at least 2 hours, then serve in glasses over ice. If you want, grate a little more lime zest over each glass.
Horchata tastes best cold cold cold! But you don’t want to be nursing a glass at a party only to find that your ice cubes have melted, diluting the sweet ricey goodness of your horchata. In order to prevent such misfortune, freeze a little of the horchata in an ice cube tray and use in place of ice cubes. Nor would a lump of vanilla ice cream go amiss.
Flanzana Cake
Flanzana: that’s “flan” plus “manzana.” Manzana is Spanish for “apple.” Flan is Spanish for “flan,” a sweet pudding you bake in the oven. Supposedly, the very best flan is made by Mexican nuns. Let’s see if the Witches can give them a run for their money! This recipe is for a flan-topped cake because a cake is easier to pack up and take to a Halloween potluck than a sticky, quavering flan. As for the manzanas, well, what’s Halloween without apples?
Prep time: 25 minutes
Bake time: 15 minutes for apples plus 45 minutes for cake
Servings: 8
Butter for greasing
1½ Golden Delicious apples
White sugar for sprinkling
6 large eggs (3 for flan and 3 for cake batter)
1 12-ounce can evaporated milk
1 14-ounce can sweetened condensed milk
½ teaspoon vanilla
1 box yellow cake mix
Water
Vegetable oil
9-inch layer cake pan
Electric mixer
Preheat oven to 300 degrees F. Line layer cake pan with nonstick foil. Generously grease bottom. (Yes, even though it’s nonstick!)
Peel, core, and slice the apples into thin wedges. Place in cake pan, turning each one over so that all wedges are buttery on both sides. Arrange them artfully in one layer, overlapping as little as possible, sprinkle with sugar and bake for 15 minutes.
Set pan with apples aside to cool.
Now for the flan part: In a large bowl, beat eggs, evaporated milk, condensed milk, and vanilla with electric mixer until frothy, about 2 minutes. Mixture will be thin. No need to wash beaters: you can use them to mix the cake batter.
Pour flan over apples in cake pan. Set aside and preheat oven to 325 degrees F.
Prepare cake batter according to instructions on box (typically requiring eggs, water, and, oil). Pour just enough batter over flan to cover it. What to do with the rest of the cake batter? See the following recipe: La Malinche cake.
Bake Flanzana cake for 45 minutes or until top is golden brown.
Cool for 10 minutes, then turn pan over onto cake plate and remove foil. Slice and serve warm or at room temperature.
La Malinche Cake
According to some versions of the story, the original La Llorona was, in life, none other than La Malinche, an Aztec princess who became the mistress of Spanish conquistador Hernán Cortés. As an Aztec, La Malinche would have taken her chocolate a little bit spicy, a little bit smoky, and not too sweet, like the vein of chocolate in this cake. This cake came about as a way of using up the batter left over from the Flanzana cake. If you have decided to skip the Flanzana cake, you can go ahead and make a whole yellow cake mix, increasing the chocolate to 2 ounces and adding a pinch more cinnamon and chili powder. One yellow cake mix will make enough to fill 2 layer cake pans, giving you two La Malinche cakes.
Prep time: 15 minutes
Bake time: 30 minutes
Servings: 8
1 8-inch or 9-inch layer cake pan
½ tablespoon butter plus a little more for greasing
Leftover yellow cake batter from Flanzana cake recipe (see above)
1 ounce unsweetened baking chocolate
¼ teaspoon vanilla extract
½ teaspoon cinnamon
One small pinch chipotle chili powder
Grease cake pan and pour about half the leftover cake batter in it. Set aside and preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
In a small pot over very low heat, melt butter and chocolate, watching all the while. You can turn off the heat before the chocolate has melted, stirring until it is completely melted. Stir in vanilla, cinnamon, and chili powder. Give it a little taste to see if you dare add more chili powder. Pour remaining cake batter into pot and stir until well blended.
Spoon chocolate batter in blobs over yellow batter, swirling it in with the tip of a knife for a marbled effect.
Bake for 30 minutes or until knife inserted in center comes out clean. Let cool for 10 minutes, then turn out onto cake plate, marbled top up.