10.36 pm: ‘That mine we found today with the bats in it ... It’s an old gold mine,’ Lachlan says. ‘Some time tonight Mr Elephant Ears and his friend are going to blow the place into a million pieces.’

‘Oh, great. We can steal the gold,’ I say. This is looking like my lucky night. First the iPod and now a sack full of gold. ‘We’ll just wait until the men have blown up the mine, sneak in and help ourselves.’

‘Aren’t you forgetting something?’ Mimi says.

‘I’ll share it with you,’ I say, hoping that is the thing I’ve forgotten. ‘We’re partners, right?’

‘You’re forgetting about the bats,’ Mimi says in her best schoolteacher voice.

I hate it when she uses that.

‘That mine is full of ghost bats,’ she reminds me.

Another good plan spoiled by Professor Bigbrains.

‘Very rare ghost bats. You’re not going to let those men blow up the mine and kill all the bats, are you?’ Mimi says.

‘Aren’t we?’ I mumble. I would agree that ghost bats are more important than a mine full of coal or oil or something like that ... but we’re talking about gold here.

‘No, we’re not,’ Mimi says, answering her own question. ‘We’re going to save the bats.’

‘We’re saving the bats!’ Ben shouts. He swings a glowing octopus in the air and almost knocks my eye out.

‘We’re saving the bats!’ I repeat. But just quietly I’m planning how I can save the bats and how I can sneak back into the mine tomorrow and save myself some gold. The bats aren’t going to need it, are they?

‘I’ve got a plan,’ Lachlan says, trying to retake charge of our band of animal warriors. ‘We find where they’ve hidden the explosives. Throw a match on them and stand back. It’ll be better than the fireworks at the Royal Show.’

‘I love the Show,’ Ben says. ‘Will there be a stunt car display? Will anyone be shot from a cannon?’

‘We’ll be the ones shot into the sky if we set fire to the explosives,’ I say. ‘The explosives are in the back of the ute.’

‘Well, what are we doing in the ute?’ Lachlan asks.

‘Hiding from the dog,’ Ben replies.

Isn’t that obvious to everyone?

‘I have an idea,’ I say. ‘We’ll move the explosives.’

‘How are we going to carry all those explosives into the bush without Mr Elephant Ears, his mate, his son and his dog noticing?’ Lachlan asks.

‘We’re not. We’re going to take the car, with the explosives in the back and drive to the Hazard River Fire Station. There’ll be someone there who knows what to do with them.’

I sit back and wait for the applause. I have come up with the most awesome plan ever. But Lachlan doesn’t think so.

‘So you’ve got the keys to the car, have you?’ Lachlan says, looking at me.

He knows I haven’t.

‘No, I don’t have the keys,’ I say. My plan is already starting to unravel.

‘Great idea, Jack. Brilliant plan,’ Lachlan says, mocking me.

But I’m not ready to give up yet.

‘The keys are in the house ... on the kitchen bench,’ I lie.

I have no idea where the car keys are. It’s just a wild guess. Mum always leaves her keys on the kitchen bench, so maybe everyone does.

‘We’ll sneak inside and get them. Ben, you’re the smallest. You can go in.’

‘No, I don’t want to go near Mr Elephant Ears,’ Ben cries. ‘You can’t make me go. I want Lachlan’s plan. I want to see fireworks.’

‘It’s your plan, Jack. You go,’ Lachlan says.

And so it’s settled. I’ll have to find the car keys if we are going to save the bats tonight.