Acknowledgments

This book didn’t happen on its own. At the bare minimum, these are the people I should thank:

• My literary agent, Mark Gottlieb of Trident Media Group. I’m starting to wonder if there’s a book proposal you can’t sell. You need more of a challenge. I promise to make my next pitch considerably worse.

• Glenn Yeffeth, publisher of BenBella Books. You signed me for a second book before I sold a single copy of my first one. A wiser man might have hedged his bets. You doubled down. Thanks for betting big on me.

• Leah Wilson, BenBella editor-in-chief. If readers could see all the jokes you made me cut, I wouldn’t have any readers left. Thanks for protecting me from me.

• My kids. You were the guinea pigs for the parenting techniques in this book. Thanks for not dying. That would have made the closing paragraphs super awkward.

• My wife. The internet only has to tolerate me in small bursts. You have to put up with me all the time. Thanks for not murdering me in my sleep.