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“WHERE ARE TANK AND Lisa?” Blackwell asked. “For that matter, where are Ben and Kate? All of them are late. I eschew being late.”
“They called earlier today, and all of them are coming together,” I said. “The invitation was for between seven and eight, and since it’s almost eight, I expect them to be here soon. Traffic is probably nuts tonight, so calm down.”
“Please. They should have been here at seven on the dot just as we were. I mean, come on, Lisa might have a few bestsellers under her belt, but if she’s going to start behaving like a diva, I’m ready to set her straight.”
“Lisa is no diva, and you know it.”
“She’s certainly behaving like one.”
“Alex mentioned that Ben had a job to finish before they came tonight. That might have held them up.”
“A fog of lies,” she said.
“No one is lying here...”
“Whether they are or not, pity for them if they come too late, because I saw that sorry little bar of yours, and it’s barely stocked. As for the food, it’ll be gone before they arrive.”
“There is plenty of food and plenty of booze.”
“Said the serpent to the woman standing before her in the church of Chanel...”
“Yennifer no serpent,” Epifania said.
“And this from the woman who was born between sudden gasps of voodoo and witchery on a pile of banana leaves.”
“Voodoo?” Epifania said. “Witchery? What you talking about, lady?”
“I’m talking about voodoo and witchery,” she said. “Because without their hellish powers, how else could you be here with us tonight? For that matter, how else could you have landed Rudman as your suitor?”
“Epifania is the most amazing woman I’ve ever met,” Rudman said.
“Excellent point,” Alex said.
“To me, it sounds more like a Valentine’s day card that somehow made its way to us on Christmas eve,” Blackwell said. “But how very clever of you, Rudman. Well played...”
“Clever?” he said. “Well played? I’m in love with Epifania, Barbara.”
“Don’t listen to her, Rudman,” I said. “She’s just trying to get everyone riled up.”
“As she always does,” Alex said. “And as only she can.”
“Well, someone has to lighten the goddamned mood after witnessing that harrowing reconciliation between my daughter and Cutter,” Blackwell said. She glanced over her shoulder, where Daniella and Cutter were talking on one of the sofas behind her, and I saw her face soften a bit before she turned back to us. “I was only teasing, Rudman. Just being sarcastic. I think you two make a wonderful couple.”
“Thank you,” he said.
“Mon plaisir. Now, changing the subject—Epifania, I have to say that your gown is to die for.”
“Of course you say that,” Epifania said. “You’re the one who pick it out for me, lady.”
“Did I?”
“You know you did. We went to Bergdorf together last week.”
“A feather of a memory that I must have tossed to the wind. But it is sublime, isn’t it? As is that new bracelet I see on your wrist—give it here.”
“You expect me to take it off and yust give it to you?”
“Please. I just want to admire it. Extend your arm to me. That’s right—turn it this way and that.”
Epifania did.
“It’s spectacular,” she said. “Magnificent. A gift from Rudman, I presume? Or was this paid for with your dead Chuckie’s money...?”
“I have no part in this,” she said. “This come from my Rudsy. Who else have the kind of dough to give me this sort of bling?”
“In this city, plenty of men do, Epifania,” Rudman said. “I just happen to be the lucky one to give it to you.”
“Now, you see,” Epifania said as she put her arm around his waist and leaned into him. “This why I love him. Not because of bracelet, as much as I love it. But because he kind. Because he sweet. Because he really love me for the me. And because he funny as hell, which Epifania the love.”
“To be studied by scientists one day, no doubt,” Blackwell said. “But congratulations, nevertheless.” She turned to her side, reached for Alexa’s hand, and pulled her closer to the group. “Rudman, have you met my sane daughter Alexa?”
“Mother...” Alexa said.
“I haven’t had the pleasure,” he said to Alexa as he extended his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Alexa.”
“It’s my pleasure, Mr. Cross.”
I watched Alexa as she and Rudman exchanged pleasantries and thought of just how much she’d grown up since I’d first met her. She looked especially beautiful tonight in a sleeveless silk gown in black and royal blue. It had a jewel neckline, a ruched front, and a braided waist with beading. The fitted silhouette gave her slim figure a certain voluptuousness.
“I love your gown, Alexa,” Epifania said. “It so pretty. In fact, I never see you so pretty. I just adore all of it!”
“Thank you, Epifania.”
“Who you wearing?”
Alexa shrugged. “I can’t remember the designer’s name. But since I knew that Jennifer and Alex were going to a lot of trouble to make this evening special in the wake of Aiden’s birth, I wanted to look my best, but without selling out.”
“What you mean by that, the love cat?”
“I care about the Earth,” Alexa said.
“She’s a tree hugger,” Blackwell said with a sip of her martini. “She’s totally out there hugging the trees.”
“So what if I am, mother? My gown is made entirely of silk, which is a sustainable fabric. When produced by weavers on handlooms, silk has a near- zero energy footprint, and it also satisfies most of the guidelines for sustainable fabric production. That’s important to me.”
Not following, Epifania just blinked.
“The designer Alexa’s wearing is Carmen Marc Valvo,” Blackwell said. “And I have to say that despite any ethical issues that were involved in choosing her gown, it is divoon. I mean, I never thought that I’d see my youngest looking like this. Usually, she doesn’t give a damn about fashion—sometimes, in fact, it looks as if she’s wearing a sack made of hemp. But with this dress? I think that we might have made progress!”
“Best not to dream that particular dream, mother,” Alexa said. “I just wanted to respect the night for what it was, and since this gown checked off every sustainable box I could find when I researched it, I decided to buy and wear it.”
“You researched your gown? Jesus, Alexa, it’s just a fucking frock,” Blackwell said.
“No, it isn’t,” she said. “In fact, I strongly disagree.”
“How is it possible that you’re even my daughter?”
“I’ve been trying to work that out for years,” Alexa said. “Not that it matters—or that I’d ever think of trading you in, as impossible as you can be.”
“Just imagine trying to replace me,” Blackwell said. “You’d literally wear yourself out. You’d become too thin, too pale. Otherwise known as the person you are today.”
“I’m finished with the zingers, mother.”
“It’s just the martinis talking, darling, so don’t fret just yet. I’ll try to keep them in check.”
“Your mouth or the martinis?”
“To be decided...”
“What do you do for work, Alexa?” Rudman asked, likely in an effort to throw Alexa a lifeline.
“I work for Wenn environmental,” she said.
“Good for you. In what field?”
“Sustainable energy—and I love it.” She looked over at Alex and me. “Jennifer and Alex offered me the job. They are the ones who made my dream come true. I can’t ever thank them enough for it.”
“It’s our pleasure,” Alex said.
“Indeed, it is,” I said. “Because the job not only suits you, but you suit it. I can’t think of anyone more passionate about protecting our environment than you, Alexa. We’re lucky to have you. So, please, allow me to speak for Alex and me when I say that we’re happy you took the job. We keep hearing raves about you, you know?”
“You do?” she asked.
“We do,” Alex said.
“You know,” Blackwell said with a whimsical note in her voice. “Alexa even cares about the air we breathe. No, really, she does. It’s a passion of hers. She cares that the green grass continues to grow, that the stars continue to shine, and that the bees continue to buzz. Oh, and she even cares about the workforce in China, which apparently made my ensemble tonight, which she made abundantly clear to me on the drive over here with one massive dose of Christmas guilt.”
“Whoever made your suit worked under slavish conditions,” Alexa said. “And with little pay. And yet you probably spent ten grand on it. Think about that.”
“When I’m old enough to find time to sit down with a cat on my lap and take up knitting, I will. Beyond that, what the rest of you should know is that whenever Alexa mentions a footprint, it has nothing to do with one’s actual footprint—you know, the kind you leave in your wake in a pair of Dior heels? When she says ‘footprint,’ she’s actually talking about one’s carbon footprint, which I still don’t fully understand, but which is something that is extremely important to Alexa. In fact, I’d go so far to say that that subject is something she can talk your ear off about. You know, until you want to pull a Van Gogh and chop off your ear yourself.”
“That’s rather harsh,” Alexa said.
“Well, I don’t mean it to be. You know that I’m proud of you. I’m just still trying to understand the dynamics of how Chanel and I produced you.”
“Chanel?” Alexa said. “Don’t you mean ‘Charles’? You know, as in my father?”
“An unfortunate slip of the tongue.”
“And one tainted by too much vodka.”
When Alexa said that, the elevator rang for the last time that night.
“Excuse me,” I said. “That will be Lisa, Tank, Kate, and Ben.”
“It’s about time they showed up,” Blackwell said. “You and Alex go and tend to them while I get myself another martini.”
“Have you eaten anything today?” I asked her.
“The usual,” she said to me. “Coffee for breakfast, a light salad for lunch, and handfuls of ice in between.”
“If that’s all you’ve eaten, you might want to reconsider that third martini, Barbara.”
“Please,” she said. “I can handle my booze, darling.”
“Can you? If you have another drink, I think you might be on the verge of getting loaded.”
“What a cruel and thoughtless thing to say. You’d think you were concerned that I was about to make a mockery of myself tonight. I mean, Christ, Jennifer. I certainly hope that you know me better than that...”
And then, with a whiff of irritation that I’d ever say such a thing to her, she turned around, flagged a server while wiggling her empty glass above her head, and asked for another martini.
