Royal Genovian Stables
I’m hiding in the stables right now with Chrissy and Snowball because this is the only place people aren’t rushing around setting up things or cleaning for the wedding, and I need to think. I have to get this all down or I’m going to go crazy. I can’t believe this. My life is a nightmare!
And Nishi is coming TOMORROW, expecting me to be living some kind of fairy-tale princess life, and I’m so NOT!
Well, I mean, I kind of am, compared to most people. My life is basically much, much better than it was. I don’t want to seem ungrateful.
But this princess thing is not as easy as I thought it was going to be!
(Although I have to admit, the food really makes up for a lot of it. Oh, and the clothes. And having wonderful pets and living with people who actually care about me.)
But some of them care too much! Prince Gunther, for instance, who has now stopped flinging boogers and making fart noises with his mouth, because he thinks if he acts more “princely,” I’ll be his girlfriend.
Even though I have assured him (in the nicest way possible) that this is most definitely NOT TRUE! There is nothing he can do to make me want him as a boyfriend. NOTHING. I only want to be friends.
I think tomorrow if he’s still acting so lovey-dovey, I might have to ask my dad if I can be homeschooled … or transfer to The Royal School in Switzerland. I don’t want to hurt Gunther’s feelings or anything (I already had to watch him cry once today).
But I do NOT want Prince Gunther as a boyfriend. Not because of his socks and shower sandals or green hair or anything like that. I just do NOT like him in that way.
But of course as soon as we got back to class and started dancing again, Luisa noticed how he was treating me (seriously, no one could miss it: He now handles me as if I were a dainty leaf that he might crush with the slightest touch) and leaned over to whisper, while we were promenading, “Kee-yow, Olivia! I think someone has a crush!”
Since this whole thing was Luisa’s fault anyway, I gave her a dirty look and whispered back, “Not helping, Luisa.”
“Why?” She pretended I’d hurt her feelings, which I know I hadn’t, because Lady Luisa has no feelings. “Now you can invite him to your sister’s wedding reception. You want to have someone to dance with there, too, don’t you?”
ACK!
“Still not helping, Luisa!” I said when I passed her again on the next promenade.
She only laughed and flounced away.
At least I’m not the only one who notices. Luisa is so mean that even Princess Komiko, who hardly ever says anything, whispered to me at lunch today, “Don’t let Lady Luisa get you down, Princess. She’s rude to everyone.”
“But why?” I asked as we practiced using our fish forks. “She’s so pretty. Why does she have to be so mean?”
“She didn’t used to be,” Princess Komiko said. “But then her parents got divorced.”
I almost choked on my endive salad. “Her parents got divorced?”
“Yes,” Princess Komiko said. “In the second grade. After that, she became very rude. Of course, my parents got divorced, too, but I did not become rude to everyone. I guess it can affect different people in different ways. Would you please pass the salt?”
I passed Princess Komiko the salt, thinking about what she’d said. Luisa’s parents were divorced? That was terrible! I’ve never had divorced parents, so I don’t know what it feels like. I have a dead mother, but she died when I was a baby and I’d never got a chance to know her. It’s certainly true that things affect different people in different ways.
But no one should take their problems out on other people.
See, this is why I’d never been as big a fan of fairy tales as Nishi—especially ones with princesses in them. She completely believes that when it says “And they lived happily ever after” at the end, that’s it, that’s the end, and everyone really does live happily ever after.
But that’s not true. Life keeps on happening after the end. Good stuff and bad stuff. You could be a princess like Komiko and have your parents get divorced. Or you could be a princess like me and escape one mean girl (like Annabelle, at my old school) only to find another one (my cousin Luisa) at your new school.
Who (besides Nishi) even believes in fairy tales, anyway? Some of those stories are all right, I guess, like “Little Red Riding Hood.” It’s never a good idea to talk to strangers, especially wolves.
But some of those other stories don’t even make any sense. It’s not physically possible to sleep for a hundred years! You would die of starvation.
And princes can’t really kiss anyone awake (unless what they’re really doing is performing CPR).
Whenever I bring this up, though, Nishi says I’m missing the point, and that all of these things are happening due to magic, and that I’m just not ready yet to see the magic in real life.
But I have seen magic in real life! I went from living in the suburbs of New Jersey to a castle in Genovia, didn’t I?
So what’s Nishi going to say when she gets here and she finds out I’m messing everything up, and maybe—possibly—ruining everyone’s happily ever after?
And okay, maybe that’s a little bit of an exaggeration—nobody has bitten any poisoned apples and died or anything.
But I don’t feel as if my plan of helping Mia with her problems as a wedding gift is really working out, in part due to my cousin Luisa, who has problems of her own.
Instead I’m only creating more problems … especially since this afternoon when I got home from school, the majordomo told me that Snowball had stolen two sausages and wheel of Brie from the kitchen today!
A group of tourists found part of the Brie later in the Hall of Portraits. It was behind the bust of my great-great-grandfather. The tourists took photos of it and now “Dog Cheese” is one of the top trending topics online.
I wish I could just live here in the stables with Chrissy and Snowball. Everything is so calm and nice and smells like hay.
Which is quite a good smell, when you get used to it.
But as I explained to Rocky when he wanted to fly to the moon, you can’t run away from your problems.… You have to face them, or they’ll never get solved.
So I have to go back to school tomorrow and face everyone—including Luisa.
And Prince Gunther.
Oh, there’s Grandmère out there with the electricians, telling them where to string the party lights for the reception. I guess I should go help.