Chapter 13

She’d heard that name before. Star maiden. It sounded so romantic and beautiful, but the expression on Mac’s face gave her pause. His eyes were wide with amazement and sadness. Lifen and Batukhan turned to Mac with frightened expressions.

Mac scanned the wilderness. Then he put his arms around Chance and Ana. “We should go inside.”

“What’s going on?” Gabby asked Derek, who shrugged and nuzzled his nose against her cheek.

Mac guided Chance and Ana all the way down to the house. When they were safely inside, he finally let go. Each breath Ana exhaled seemed to provide even less oxygen than the last. Faint and numb, Ana leaned against Chance for support. That exact moment, Ana felt like she was back on Dr. Wilson’s exam table at Children’s Hospital, waiting for her diagnosis.

This was it. The other shoe dropping.

In the living room, everyone encircled them and waited for Mac to speak. Even Lifen and Batukhan shared a curious, but frightened expression, suggesting they, like Ana, were awaiting unknown information.

Somehow, Ana found her voice first. Her throat was dry and closed up, so it came out soft, timid. “I’ve heard that before. What is a star maiden?”

Mac blinked and didn’t say anything. When he did speak, his words were chosen with care. “Many cultures have legends of the star maiden. The Native Indians said that a beautiful star maiden came to Earth with her sisters. When a young hunter saw her in the forest, he fell in love. Worried he’d frighten her away if he approached as a mortal, he turned into a field mouse and ran under her feet. When he was close enough, he became a man again and held her tight. Although her sisters had run away, Star Maiden did not. She looked into his eyes, saw how handsome he was and returned his love. The two were married, but it was not long before Star Maiden felt the call to return home, to the stars.”

All of this was strangely familiar to Ana. She interrupted him, “That’s a great story and all—it actually reminds me of the ox herder and the weaver girl story Lifen told me, but I don’t know what that means. Can you just talk straight with me?”

Mac shrugged and said, “Listen, Ana, I’ve only heard of women like you. Never met or seen one for myself and I have seen many things. This is how rare you are. I understand star maidens are born of sacrifice—shifter healers like you and Lifen—but star maidens are rare even among your kind. From what I understand, from the time they are created, their energy builds at an abnormal rate. Their glow can be seen by mundanes when they enter this heightened phase. And this continues until they supernova. There is no recovering if this happens. Unlike the name, you don’t actually become a star, but you return your energy back to the earth—there is nothing left of you.”

Beside her, Chance whispered, “No.”

Numbness took hold of Ana’s body and she could only blink in response. She stared at Mac as he continued to speak, feeling distanced from what was happening around her.

“The human body cannot control that amount of power from igniting when it’s released, but there is a creature that’s able to. The phoenix. It’s the one being that can let go of that amount of energy and survive.”

Ana stared in disbelief at Lifen. “Have you ever heard of any of this? Can he be right?”

Lifen shared a look with Batukhan before speaking. “I have heard the star maiden stories, but did not think they were real. I also know the phoenix legends, but have never heard of their connection.” A frown crossed her face and she faced Mac. “I do not understand how a man like yourself knows of this? Can you be old enough to hold this knowledge?”

While Lifen spoke to him, Mac held his gaze on Ana, unmoving. His hazel eyes drilled into her. The questions asked went unanswered. A gentle inquiry was made, his voice soft and low, “How do you know this name? Where did you hear it before? Think.”

Agitated, Ana wracked her brain, trying to remember. It wasn’t too long ago, but not so close that it had happened after Christmas. Definitely before she went home to Idaho with Chance.

Star maiden. A vision filled her thoughts. It was of her standing in the snow, glowing along with the moonlight.

“I know,” she said. “Chance’s dream. A couple weeks ago I saw what he was dreaming. It was his memory of the night we found each other and the first moments he saw me. Before he attacked. The voice in his head called me a star maiden.”

The look of sadness on Mac’s face morphed and twisted into something else. Fear.

Somehow, Ana got the feeling that the worst of the news hadn’t even come yet. She couldn’t seem to move her focus from Mac. Time felt like it slowed as she waited for more from him. Chance’s hand fumbled for hers and they held onto each other like there was no letting go.

“That changes things, sadly. I thought I could deal with that little problem myself without involving you all, but it seems I was wrong. You’re in it now.” Mac gestured to the couches and chairs. “We might as well sit down while I decide how much is safe for you to know.”

The night’s amusements had long dissolved from the other’s faces. Jordan, Derek, and Gabby watched Ana like bystanders of a horrible disaster. Derek sat down on a sofa chair and pulled Gabriella onto his lap. Jordan perched wide-eyed on the armrest, making him seem even younger than he was.

Mac sat to the left of Ana and Chance on the couch and Batukhan and Lifen settled on the loveseat to their right. Everyone remained silent, but shot uneasy glances around the room.

“From the time Batukhan filled in the details of the night I met Chance, I’ve suspected Chance hadn’t suffered from only the shifter sickness. And a few weeks back, Chance and Ana passed information to me that confirmed my suspicion. I haven’t wanted to concern you with the details since it is my task to take care of it, my post and duty. I thought I could get Chance on his feet so I could leave to find him on my own, but now—” Mac sighed and patted Ana’s shoulder. “Chance was not only suffering from the sickness, but something far worse. Shifters have been part of this world for a long time and since that age, there have been those curious enough to reach for what’s just beyond their reach—eternal life and the power of the universe. Through experimentation, some discovered how to fuse their intact soul to another’s when they were killed. I will not discuss the details, since this knowledge is dangerous and those who hold it”—Mac stared at Chance and Ana—“must never use or share it. This has always been a problem with shifters. I believe it has everything to do with our decreasing numbers. You see, if you absorb the energy from another of our kind, a fraction of their memories and personality is fused to you—this includes animal mappings. This is a moral dilemma. Do you use the information that you did not earn, or do you wait to understand that knowledge?”

Ana thought about the forms she’d taken based off the memories Chance had left her with. Her cheeks flushed with guilt. She wasn’t born with these gifts—she’d been given them by sacrifice. Now, she felt unworthy of them. No better than a child with a shiny new toy, she’d leapt first and realized the implications later.

Under her breath, she said, “I didn’t earn it, but I used my new powers anyway. I pushed my limitations too fast so I could help Chance. I’ve been living on borrowed time—I was never supposed to survive that day on the mountaintop. Maybe I’m a star maiden for good reason—I did it to myself.”

Chance slid to the floor at her feet and grabbed her shoulders. His fingers dug in as he shook her. “Don’t talk like that. It can’t be true. You deserve to be alive just like anyone else. It’s not true, it’s not. Mac, tell her.”

The smile that spread across Mac’s lips was a melancholy one, making Ana feel more justified in her statement. He answered, “Ana is very wise. But while I’m alive I will fight to prove her wrong—it’s my job to protect the world from those whose purpose is selfish and she is the furthest thing from it. I have discovered someone that threatens us all.” Mac tilted his head to the side.

Their anxious stares pushed him to continue. “It wasn’t only the sickness that ailed Chance, it seems. There’s a soul named Daemon that was previously hosted in Chance’s cousin. When Chance killed Markus, Daemon, having the ability to fuse to Chance’s energy at the release of his soul, attached himself to Chance. These beings can be almost impossible to find and even harder to fight and permanently release. This wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for the fact that he knows you’re a star maiden. I’m sure he was fascinated with you and your power at first. You would be tempting to anyone like him, a vessel—sorry Ana, no better way to say it—that has far more power than any shifter. You’re young and easier to break into submission. I commend Chance for trying to hold out for so long, but many cave to the powerful urges and images they’re exposed to.”

Chance pinched his eyes shut. “So, it was more than just an impression of another shifter. That’s why the voice was so strong.”

“Yes.”

A more important question needed to be asked, but Ana couldn’t find her voice. Her throat had gone dry.

“What’s it matter that he knows she’s a star maiden?” Chance spat, agitated.

“It’s believed that once a shifter, like Daemon, is able to soul jump as he does, it is the second step toward immortality. The final phase requires a massive amount of power to be able to fuse with energy itself, creating the ability to dissipate or coalesce. To become energy—become immortal. The kind of heat and intense power can only be generated by a star maiden when her energy is released to the universe, returning her to the stars.” Mac crossed his arms and leaned them on his knees. “Chance, I don’t think I have to tell you that a personality like Daemon’s would not be a good candidate for this kind of power. Don’t you agree?”

Chance tipped back into a sitting position at Ana’s feet. His skin blanched and he shook his head. “He’s still around? I thought you said he was gone.”

Mac placed his hand on Chance’s shoulder. “While you went home to Idaho, I went to see if I could find him, but it’s hard finding someone who doesn’t want to be found.”

Jordan stood up and began to back out of the room while he looked from one face to the next. “Who’s he in?”

Ana knew the answer and was angry she hadn’t listened to her instincts from the start. Derek may have been right to some small degree, but the truth was far worse than he’d suggested.

Ana closed her eyes and said, “Ryan. Ryan’s his host now.”

Derek swore and Gabby adjusted to look at him. Lifen stood up and said in a soothing voice, “Now let’s just calm down. There’s no proof of that, is there?”

Mac answered, “Well, no. There certainly isn’t, but it’s not something we can ignore. From what I understand, he interrupted Ana from pulling Daemon free of Chance. A burst of light was seen and we are pretty confident that neither Chance nor Ana are his host at this point, so that leaves the person who left without a word.”

Lifen stood speechless. She lifted her hand to her temple and said, “He’s my responsibility. I should have gone to check on him—I thought he was just being an annoying youngling and was licking the wounds of a broken heart.”

Batukhan got up and put his arm around her. “No one knows the future. You didn’t know what you do now. It’s what we do moving forward that counts. Mac, what are our options?”

For the last minute, Chance had been gazing at Ana. That same expression of determination came over his face that she’d seen so many times before. He rose to his feet and his fists clenched.

“Daemon can’t have her and I won’t let Ana die. How do we get phoenix form?”

“Enter our hero,” Mac said with a toothy grin. “The only problem we face is the fact that only shifter healers are able to take this form. That makes it harder to find someone who knows it, or has a relic from one. This is why the legends say the phoenix is reborn every thousand years.”

Everyone but Ana turned to Lifen, hoping the solution was at their fingertips. Ana already knew her mentor didn’t know the form, she’d already told her so.

Lifen answered their stares. “I wish I knew the form. I’ve only heard legends of the bird.”

Chance’s eyes were frantic, moving back and forth. “Okay, we need to find another shifter healer or a relic of the phoenix. And we need to keep her from Daemon while we look. How much time do you think she has, Mac?”

“I can’t be sure, but her energy should continue to expand. It could be months at best, but I really don’t know.”

Lifen’s gaze fell on Ana. “There must be something we can do to slow this process.”

Mac answered, “I think there may be. It’s beyond my abilities. There’s only so much I can do as a shapeshifter, but I think you and Gabby might be able to work together to help her. And Ana will have to stop using her powers altogether.”

Everyone was staring at her. She felt like a strange species on display at the zoo. Nothing was okay about any of it. Her skin crawled and heat flushed to her neck and face. She didn’t like being the subject of study. Ana didn’t like it when she was five in the cardiology clinic and she didn’t like it now. Any private cave would do, someplace dark and hidden from view. She needed the one thing that was always there for her.

With a gasp, she launched off the couch and ran down the hallway. Past the meditation room and the stairs leading to the lower level, she pushed her way into Lifen’s room. She didn’t let her eyes stray to the illustration on the wall of the colorful mythological bird, because she didn’t want to acknowledge it. Her feet padded up the circular stairwell to the glass-enclosed lookout and stopped at the top step.

The clear, onyx sky held a multitude of bright, white points, glimmering away, naïve to what was unraveling below them on Earth. Ana tilted her head back. A stream of wet tears poured from her eyes and caught in her hair. She clamped her eyes shut and balled up her fists.

It was too good to be true, she told herself. Cursed to die young.

Her breath caught in her throat, pain traveled from her lungs, to her extremities. Lightheaded and numb, she sank to the floor, but a pair of arms caught her before she hit the ground.

“I have you.” Chance’s voice brushed past her ear.

Whimpering sounds filled the room and she realized it was coming from her. Sobs and cries followed once she took a deep lungful of air.

Chance’s hand cupped her face and he lowered his forehead to hers. “I won’t let anything happen to you. You’re safe.”

Words like those were whispered to her when she was little. She’d gotten to the point when she didn’t want to hear it anymore, because it felt like a lie. There was no way he or her mother could make promises like these. She knew this.

But she held her eyes shut anyway and pretended he was right.