CHAPTER TWENTY

 

 

Two days had passed without their paths crossing. Charlie’d had a busy weekend: lunch with her friends, and a movie date with Cara on Saturday; then she’d gone over to Cara’s for the day on Sunday because her friend wanted to learn how to cook a Sunday roast to impress Nathan, who was now officially her boyfriend.

The cookery lesson had gone well, apart from the Yorkshire pudding disaster, but Charlie had never cooked them before and for a first attempt. . . Nope. She couldn’t even lie. They’d been bloody awful, hard like rock cakes. There was no getting away from it.

Charlie was lacking motivation this morning, moving around her flat like she’d had no sleep when in reality she’d had too much. After going to bed early, she’d fallen asleep pretty much straight away. The long hours she’d slept, there should be a spring in her step—well rested and raring to go. But as she packed her uni bag, all Charlie wanted to do was get a blanket, curl up on the sofa, and watch all the daytime telly she used to love.

Twenty minutes later with a half-eaten piece of toast stuffed in her gob, she stepped out of her flat and her ear was immediately drawn to a door opening down the hall.

Expecting to see Jake heading out to work, Charlie paused when a woman stepped out of his flat instead. Making like Nancy Drew, she quickly ducked back inside, peeking around the doorframe. The woman turned to face his open door, an affectionate smile on her face as she nodded a couple of times, listening to whatever Jake was telling her. She wasn’t old, maybe early thirties from what Charlie could see. Long brown hair hung neatly down her back. She wore a camel-coloured coat that stopped at her knees, with tailored grey trousers and black shoes that had a slight heel, and was holding a small, black handbag.

The woman nodded a couple of times, laughing and saying something back to him. Then it looked like she said goodbye before walking away.

Jake’s door closed, and Charlie stood there for a minute.

Had the woman stayed the night?

Charlie’s stomach sank a little. After what had almost happened on Friday night, she thought there might have been something starting to happen between them.

There could have been a reasonable explanation for a nice looking woman to be in his flat at that time in the morning, but her mind, of course, wanted to stick to the most obvious answer no matter how much she tried to convince herself otherwise.

Disappointment crushing her hope, Charlie walked down the hall, hitching her bag up higher on her shoulder and wishing she could somehow erase what she’d seen. Then Jake’s door opened swiftly as she was passing. Great. Just what she needed. But she didn’t stop. Glancing back at him she said, “Morning,” in the most regular, not-jealous-at-all voice she could conjure up. Then she carried on walking, wanting to appear like she was in a rush.

She heard him say, “Hi,” before she pushed through the door to the stairwell and descending the stairs like the place was on fire.

Phew. Thank God that awkward situation had been dodged.

In her mind, Charlie was making light of the situation. Shame the rest of her wasn’t following along. She wanted to brush it off, she really did. It is what it is, she told herself. She was happy for him.

Why, then, did her chest feel so hollow all of a sudden?

 

 

* * *

 

 

It’s for the best.

The words were in Jake’s thoughts, had been for most of the day, but it didn’t mean it was truly what he wanted. All day he’d been on edge. Pissed off with the way things had gone with Charlie and it was no fault on her part. He’d been the one to get scared. It was him who’d pulled back, having second thoughts about kissing her at the last minute when he’d already showed his hand. So tempted. He’d wanted to kiss her. All night at The Crow he’d barely been able to take his eyes off her. And when she’d suggested going for a ride, he knew immediately where he wanted to take her, and had planned on doing it there under the stars.

You’re a fucking idiot.

Like he didn’t know that anyway. For getting involved with her in the first place. For starting to feel things he’d hidden away for most of his adult life. For hoping.

Then he’d lost his bottle, panicking at the last minute; the distraction giving him a get out.

Holding back because he was too fucking set in his ways.

His life had been pretty straight forward until she’d come along. Granted, it was shit, yes. But at least he’d had a plan. And now a woman who lived on his floor had thrown it all into disarray.

What was he supposed to do?

With the shit that was hanging over his head, getting involved with someone was impossible, let alone unfair to Charlie.

And now he had another issue to deal with.

However, that issue might have just helped him. When Samantha left his flat this morning, he knew Charlie had seen her. He’d spent most of his day ignoring the urge to go and clear things up

This could be his out.

It’s for the best, he told himself again, for both of them. He would leave things as they were in the hope that Charlie made her own assumptions and pulled away from him.

Why then, hours later, was he waiting outside their apartment building, leaning against his bike, waiting for Charlie to get home?

Because he’d lost his fucking mind.

And he meant in the actual cognitive sense—as in, he needed a mental health check-up.

The truth was—and he hated himself for not sticking to his plan—that he didn’t want Charlie thinking he’d been with another woman, which was madness; he couldn’t afford to care about what she thought of him. It wasn’t like he could explore the attraction that was so blatantly obvious between them.

Shit.

His head was so fucked up it was exhausting.

Which is why he was standing here now. Jake needed a break from the battle he was constantly fighting within himself since Charlie had shown up in his life. And yes she was in it, there was no denying it. Albeit temporarily. Maybe if he stopped fighting, just for a brief moment, he might fare better when he left.

Not that he was leaving anytime soon.

Earlier he’d received another phone call to let him know he hadn’t got one of the flats he’d enquired about. The others hadn’t been back to him either. So it looked like another night in front of his laptop.

Good job he had plenty of beers in the fridge.

“Jake?”

He’d been so preoccupied with his thoughts he hadn’t noticed Charlie approaching. The instant pleasure her voice alone elicited inside him took him aback, but he forced the unease away. It was something he’d think about later. Turned out, when he looked up at her and saw the smile she gave him, he forgot it all anyway.

“Problem with your bike?” she asked, hugging a large file to her chest. She had a rucksack over one shoulder too and he realised she’d have carried all that from the train station, but she didn’t look tired from the walk. In fact, she looked beautiful with her reddened cheeks flushed from the wind. Honestly, that flush did things to him that he shouldn’t allow himself to think about, but had done too many times. Her blonde hair was pulled back into a wavy ponytail that bounced with her steps. She wore black leggings and a jade green top under the short leather jacket she always seemed to favour. Her makeup was subtle, black eyelashes curling up like spiders around eyes that seemed to sparkle as she waited for an answer.

Jesus Christ!

He was noticing more and more things that he liked about her.

Blinking, Jake got his shit together. “Uh, no. I was waiting for you actually.”

Now he was fidgety. Fucking fidgety. What was this woman doing to him?

“Oh?” Some of the light left her eyes and her brows pulled down. “Is something wrong?”

Smile you idiot. He did, sort of. “No. I wanted to talk to you about this morning, that’s all.”

Her head tipped a little to the side. “This morning?”

“Yeah. Shall we go inside?”

“Okay.” Glancing at him again, because obviously it was quite clear to her that he was acting weird, she walked ahead and they made their way inside.

As he followed her up the stairs to their floor, he wondered if he should start talking, get it said and out of the way then they could part ways and go about their evenings separately. He was beginning to think he’d made a bad decision and should have let the damn thing go like he’d planned.

Seriously, he was out of his depth with all this.

Before he knew it, they were approaching his flat and he realised neither of them had said a word, which only made the situation worse. Now he’d probably made Charlie feel awkward too, which was evident in the way she looked at him when they stopped outside his flat door.

“Are you sure nothing’s wrong, Jake?”

This time he didn’t hesitate. “Yeah, everything’s fine.” He unlocked his door, trying to act casual. “I wanted to explain about Samantha.”

“Who’s Samantha?”

Jake looked back and hopefully gave her a reassuring smile. “Let me just put my helmet inside. Unless you want to come in for a minute.”

He was glad when she followed him inside, but he left the door open so as not to make things more uncomfortable. Placing his helmet on the shelf under the sideboard in the hall, he turned back to Charlie who had swung her backpack off her shoulder and had put it down on the floor beside her, still holding onto the folder like it was a shield.

Keeping it casual, he said, “Samantha called round this morning to drop me some information about this thing I’m looking into.” He wasn’t going to go into too much detail. It wasn’t something he was ready to discuss with her or anyone right now.

Charlie looked at him like she was expecting him to continue, or she was trying to act like she didn’t know what he was talking about.

He gave her a half smile. “I saw you duck back inside this morning when she was leaving here.”

As her eyes widened, he was glad to see her cheeks fill with that nice pink glow they’d lost after coming inside.

“I didn’t want you to think anything of it. That’s all.”

“Oh, no. Of course.” Holding the folder with one arm, she shoved her hand in her jacket pocket. “Um, why would you think I would even have an opinion?”

Ok, so he was quite enjoying this. “Well, I know how it must have looked. Which is probably why you tried to hide, right?” He turned away and removed his bike jacket, stepping past her to hang it on the hook by the door.

She let out a sharp laugh. “I did not try to hide.” She stuttered a little. “I forgot my bag.”

Stepping back, but only a little so he remained close, he lowered his voice. “Oh. I thought you might have assumed she’d stayed over.”

He saw Charlie stiffen a little and her reaction sparked something in him that urged him to continue teasing.

Her eyes flicked up to his for only a second and she moved back a little. “Even if I did think that, it has nothing to do with me who you sleep with.” Another glance.

Maybe it was because he’d done nothing but think of the woman for weeks, but Jake found he couldn’t stop himself this time. She’d awoken something in him he thought was buried deep; it had done nothing but mess with his head ever since.

“So you wouldn’t be bothered,” he stepped closer and saw her shoulders straighten as she swallowed. His gaze fell to her tempting lips, “if I’d shagged someone last night?”

“No. Like I said, why would I be?”

When she stuck her chin up at him, her eyes pinned him with her defiance, which only spurred him on even more. Hit with a sudden urge to pick up where his cowardice had left off the other night, Jake was desperate to kiss her, and he had a feeling he wouldn’t be able to stop himself this time.