“WHY ARE YOU BACKING away?”
Vanessa stared at the hand Monty had extended to help her to the ground. Charley had already run for the house. She met Monty’s eyes now but was pretty much frozen with indecision and panic, so she didn’t move. She couldn’t go in there with him! He’d find out who she really was, which could ruin her and her family after he’d witnessed her scandalous behavior on this trip.
But when she didn’t answer him, Monty guessed, “If you’re that eager to part ways and continue your journey rather than wait for the rain to stop, I understand. You can use the coach and return it after you reach your destination. But be assured, you’re welcome to remain with us for a while. My hosts won’t mind another guest.”
But Donnan chose that moment to stick his head inside the coach to say, “That haity butler says yer trunks arrived, lass, and I’m no’ pleased that yer traveling companions appear tae have reached their destination, too.” He ended that with a distrustful glower at Monty.
“She needs a moment to compose herself, man. Big reunion and all that,” Monty told the Scot. But the moment Donnan moved away, he glanced back at Vanessa. “Well, this is a delightful surprise. So you’re either an earl’s daughter or your parents are servants. I’m leaning toward the former.”
She didn’t confirm it. Her panic was rising that a scandal would erupt if people found out she’d been traveling with his group—dressed as a boy. She evaded. “I haven’t been here for six years. They won’t recognize me.”
His eyes moved over her attire. “Or they won’t recognize you like that. D’you really have cold feet to find out whether they will or won’t?”
What she needed was time to figure out how to handle her homecoming. “Not a’tall,” she lied, even as she pulled her hood back up over her head. “But I’m not ready to reveal myself to them.”
Monty shook his head. “And here I thought we were done with that. Suit yourself—boy. I can keep your secret.”
Her heart leapt. “Really?”
“Depends for how long. I just don’t think you’ll be able to pull it off for very long, not with family. If it’s been only six years, they’ll recognize your face.” And then he chuckled. “It’s rude to wear a hood in a grand house like yours, you know.”
Annoyed that he could tease her at a time like this, she said rather sharply, “No one will notice me hiding behind your back when they have you to look at. There are a lot of women in that house. I’ll probably be overlooked and the housekeeper won’t even offer me a bloody room!”
He burst out laughing. “Who are you mad at, me, or yourself for turning coward?”
Ignoring his hand, she got out of the coach on her own and quickly followed him into the house. Only the butler was standing in the foyer. She didn’t recognize him, but the previous one had been old and must have retired. Still she stayed behind Monty’s back. Charley, who had changed into his brown wool cloak, was looking at a painting on the wall. The Scots were helping Arlo bring in some of the trunks, which formed a puddle just inside the door, so Monty moved into the adjoining hall to get out of the way. She and Charley followed him.
She heard footsteps on the grand stairs and looked in that direction. Her heart started pounding. She quickly tugged her hood down to hide more of her face and stepped behind Monty, using him as a shield. Her mother was coming down the stairs, dressed regally for the day. The cloak-like robe, made of a light white-and-blue material, mimicked a pelisse coat, opening to reveal the stylish dark blue empire dress underneath it. But then Kathleen was never taken unaware by visitors, was always at her best and always gracious no matter who she was greeting.
Vanessa carefully peeked out from behind Monty’s back to steal another glimpse of Kathleen. God, her mother appeared not to have changed at all! She was still beautiful with fashionable blond hair artfully arranged and adorned with jeweled pins, and pale blue eyes, which were identical to those of all three of her children. Tears welled up in Vanessa’s eyes. She used to love that woman—before Kathleen single-handedly tore their family apart.
When Monty lifted one arm, she stole another quick peek at her mother, who was holding out a hand in the usual manner, to be kissed or very lightly touched by whoever she was greeting.
Vanessa’s shield cut in. “Monty will do, and no titles please. My ward is Charley,” he said, and lightly slapped the boy on the back. “And the shy one behind me is Nestor.”
“I am Kathleen Blackburn, Countess of Dawton. You are most welcome in my home, gentlemen. I’m surprised Prince George remembered me, it was so long ago that we met in Brighton, where he took his holidays. But of course I was delighted by his request.”
“You understand our visit is to be clandestine?” Monty asked.
“Certainly. I will not be introducing you to my neighbors, and I will try to keep visitors to a minimum. My only worry is that you may get bored. We live quietly here.”
“Exactly what we need,” he assured his hostess with a slight bow.
The bow panicked Vanessa and made her turn about so Kathleen could only see the back of her hood. But that allowed her to see the housekeeper approaching, and she definitely recognized Mary Edwards. Anytime she and her sisters got a little rambunctious when their mother wasn’t around, Mrs. Edwards always caught them at it. And while she didn’t reveal their antics to their mother, she certainly did her share of scolding.
Turning to face Monty’s back again, she heard Kathleen say, “We weren’t sure when you would arrive. My daughters went to visit friends in Dawton town early this morning before this storm blew in. They may be waiting for it to end before they return, but they will be here for dinner, rain or no, so you will meet them then. How many extra settings for the table?”
“Three—” Monty started.
Vanessa jabbed his back and whispered, “Two.”
So he amended, “Actually, only two. It’s been a dreadful trip. One of my companions will need time to recover from it.”
“Certainly,” Kathleen replied. “But perhaps you would like some tea before you rest?”
“I don’t know about the boys, but I’ve been craving a proper bath. As I said, it’s been a dreadful, rushed trip.”
“Of course! Mrs. Edwards will show you to your rooms. I’ve opened the west wing for you, which was otherwise not in use and will give you more privacy.”
“Thank you, dear lady.”
Mrs. Edwards waved an arm toward the stairs while saying, “There’s a large room the boys can share—”
“That won’t do,” Monty quickly cut in. “They don’t get along, fistfights that could damage furniture and break windows. Well, boys will be boys, you know.”
Kathleen chuckled. “We’ve never had young boys living in this house, so we wouldn’t know about their behavior. Just show them to three rooms,” she added to the housekeeper.
“There are three servants, too,” Monty mentioned. “One is our manservant who will need to be close to us. The two big brutes, on the other hand, can stay anywhere.”
Monty was no doubt making sure there would be no complaints from Charley about Arlo’s not having a room close to his. She might have laughed at the reference to the MacCabe brothers, though, if she weren’t so nervous.
“Of course, everyone will be accommodated.”
Upstairs, when the housekeeper turned left toward the long corridor of the west wing, Vanessa was struck with a bit of nostalgia. She knew this wing well. It was the one place in the house she and her sisters could hide from their mother and her etiquette regimen, where they could play, get into arguments, delight in unrestrained laughter, and simply be children, at least until Kathleen summoned them to attend some type of lesson. The servants knew they liked to play there and kept one bedroom at the end of the long hall cleaned for them.
She and her sisters had hidden themselves away in this wing right up until her last year at home, though there was less playing by then and more talking about boys and debuts and their eagerness to join the adult world they were still too young for. Had her hopes and dreams really mirrored her sisters’ so closely, all leading to love with the perfect man and marriage? She supposed they had, but back then there had been no other options for any of them—or so they’d thought.
Monty was shown to the first room on the right, which faced the extensive back lawns and would afford him a view of the setting sun. Charley got the room across the hall, and Vanessa was given the next room on the right. She thought about requesting the room at the end of the hall, but Mrs. Edwards knew it had been a playroom for her and the twins and might find the request odd and suspect she wasn’t a stranger to the house. She didn’t pursue it—being here again was bringing her close to tears—but she couldn’t help wondering if the twins still used it as a sanctuary from their mother.
It took a long time for the servants to deliver hot water for her bath, but she’d anticipated the delay, since she’d been the last guest shown to a room. Nonetheless, she was impatient for the stream of servants to end so she could have some uninterrupted time to think. Her valise was delivered by a footman, but the clean clothes inside it would probably still be damp because they’d been washed last night at the inn and delivered back to her at dawn.
After her bath, which didn’t relax her but did leave her feeling cleaner than she’d been since beginning her journey, she crinkled her nose at the idea of donning damp clothes. She knew very well she could have had a wonderfully dry dress to wear if she had just greeted her mother normally. But there would be nothing normal about that reunion. And she certainly didn’t want it to happen in front of Monty and Charley. It was bound to be ugly—and loud with all the repressed anger that had built up over the years spilling out. William hadn’t forgiven Kathleen, and she wasn’t about to, either.
She wrapped herself in a sheet and hung the damp clothes on the furniture, hoping at least a pair of trousers and a shirt would dry quickly. She considered taking a nap, considered a ride with Snow, damp clothes or no, if the rain had let up. She went to a window to check if it was still raining and found it was. But she was arrested by the sight of the lawns she and her sisters had played on, could almost envision their games of croquet and tag, diving into large piles of autumn leaves before the gardeners could haul the piles away, building snowmen in the winter. The tears arrived, overflowed her eyes, and wouldn’t stop. She’d missed her sisters more than she’d admitted to herself. The late childhood years they might have shared were lost forever. Six years was a very long time, all three of them were adults now. Would Emily and Layla even want her back after so long?
“I know how difficult homecomings can be. When I got carried home from the war wounded, my mother and siblings wouldn’t leave my bedside. Even if you love them dearly, family can be a bloody nuisance sometimes. They wouldn’t let me sleep for all their fussing!”
She didn’t smile at Monty’s anecdote. She was a bit outraged that he had just entered her room without knocking and had come to stand right next to her. But she was also cognizant that she was naked under the sheet and how beyond the pale this was.
She turned slightly away from him, giving him mostly her back, and tightened the sheet at her breasts before she said emphatically, “You shouldn’t be in here.”
“Nor would I be if I hadn’t heard your crying from downstairs.”
He was trying to tease away her tears. It wasn’t going to work. But then he added, “Has the dam been plugged yet? I could go search for a beaver to help, but alas, they are extinct here, so I won’t lie, you’ll have to do the plugging yourself.”
That did provoke a laugh from her, but she immediately cut it off. She ought to be reprimanding him, but she just didn’t want to. She was still a little incredulous that he was even in her home, that they’d been heading to the same destination all along while they’d been so determined to keep secrets from each other. But considering all that had happened on that trip, she wondered if he was simply treating her as the boy he’d first thought her to be and really didn’t think there was anything untoward about being in her room. But he couldn’t do that anymore.
Then she felt his hands on her shoulders, massaging them, drawing forth the most exquisite sensations. “I’m sure I can take your mind off the dilemma you face, Nessi,” he whispered by her ear.
Wrong! He wasn’t treating her as a boy. She shrugged away from his hands. “Behave like a gentleman for once and go.”
He tsked. “I’m always a gentleman, I just have more fun than others. But until you’re dressed as a lady, I’m not inclined to be the gentleman for you—nor have you wanted me to be.”