TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 12

HOW TO ESCAPE FROM AN ANGRY GORILLA

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1 Evaluate the gorilla’s behavior.
An angry gorilla is likely to vocalize and pound, jump, or slap the ground before attacking.

2 Do not react to or antagonize the gorilla.

3 Watch for a bluff charge.

A gorilla may threaten a fast and intimidating “bluff” that resembles an attack.

4 Crouch down into as small a target as possible.

5 Groom.

If the gorilla is holding you, begin to “groom” its arm while loudly smacking your lips. As the gorilla’s grip relaxes, slowly move your grooming hand to the gorilla’s hand, showing keen interest in any bits of leaf or dirt on the gorilla.

6 Remain quiet and passive until the gorilla loses interest.