“I think a lot of us have regrets about Perry. We should have stepped in and tried to pray with him, to help him see the error of his ways. It’s a shame, that. But looking back at mistakes don’t help much. It only leads to a stiff neck, you know.”
AARON SCHROCK
Sitting next to Luke, Deborah looked frightened and awkward. As he made a real show of putting his notes together and getting organized, Luke berated himself. He realized now he shouldn’t have approached her at work. He should have known that she’d put her guard up in front of her friends.
Even having Frannie there hadn’t helped. Of course, Frannie was so proud of his occupation, Luke noticed she sometimes went out of her way to remind everyone that he wasn’t just the man in her life, he was a police detective, too.
Which was exactly what Deborah hadn’t needed to be reminded of. Now he was going to have to find a way to gain Deborah’s trust, or at the very least, encourage her to relax so he could get the answers he needed.
“I hope I didn’t make things too awkward for you, Deborah,” he began. “If you’re really uncomfortable, we could visit later, at your house.”
“I promise, this conversation wouldn’t be any easier at home. Besides, you are looking to find my brother’s murderer, Detective. I want to help in any way I can. Feel free to ask me anything you want, at any time.”
Her direct, honest way of speaking caught him off guard. She was the only person he’d questioned who didn’t seem to have anything to hide about Perry.
“I appreciate that.” Needing a moment to determine the best way to start, he pulled out a pencil, then set his cell phone on mute, then carefully placed it on the bench by his side.
“Deborah, tell me about the last time you saw your brother.”
And just like that, her layers of composure fell away. Her smooth expression crumbled, and her wide, hazel eyes filled with tears. She wiped at her cheek impatiently. “The last time I saw Perry was on New Year’s Eve.”
Lydia had seen Perry that afternoon. Frannie far later.
“What time?”
“I don’t rightly know, Detective. I never thought to look for the exact time.”
“Was it dark? Close to midnight? Were you at home? Do the Amish even celebrate New Year’s?”
“We do. Not with wine and all that. But we do stay up late and welcome in the New Year, same as everyone else.” Smiling slightly, she said, “When Perry and I were little, my mamm used to make us donuts. We’d eat too many while they were hot, watching the hands on the clock slowly inch toward twelve.”
“Sounds like fun.”
“It was. When we were small, Perry was great fun. He was always game for anything.” Shaking her head, her voice turned wistful. “He used to make my daed laugh and laugh. Goodness, I haven’t thought about that in years.”
Circling back to the point of their conversation, Luke said, “What about this New Year’s Eve? Where was Perry?”
She closed her eyes. When she opened them, her expression was pained. “The last time I saw him was”—she paused, thinking—“some time about noon, I’d say. I’d been making lunch.”
“And?”
“And, we talked about how next year was going to be better.” Biting her lip, she added, “He kept saying he’d had a bad year, but he was hopeful that come January, things would improve. I told him I had faith that things would.” Looking at him directly, she said, “That’s all a person can do.”
Luke sensed that Deborah was still hiding information from him. “So you never saw him that evening? You’re sure?”
“Oh, I’m very sure. I looked for him the whole evening, you see. Even until we counted down to midnight. My parents were upset.”
“They’d expected him home?”
“Yes.” She looked apologetic. “Things aren’t all that different with the Amish than the English, Detective Reynolds. Perry was twenty-two. Men his age don’t usually choose to spend New Year’s Eve with their parents and sister.” She sighed. “But he had promised us that he would be there. He had started acting more like himself, you see.”
Worried she was going to stumble over her brother’s drug use, he attempted to get that off the plate. “It’s common knowledge that he’d been taking drugs . . .”
She shook her head. “It wasn’t that. It was that all of a sudden he was acting like he cared again. Like a veil had been lifted from his face and he was seeing more clearly. We waited for him to come home.” Her voice cracked. “But he never did.”
“Mose told me that you didn’t report him missing. No one in your family did. Where did y’all think he was?”
Something new flashed in her eyes. “I didn’t know . . .”
“Come on, Deborah. You lived with Perry, you knew him better than just about anyone. Where did you think your brother was?”
“I thought he’d finally left,” she said sharply, pain etched deep in her eyes. “I knew he’d tried to change, but it was also obvious that he’d burned too many bridges and that no one cared he was ready to make a new start. That upset him very much, you see. He had really thought we’d all forgive him easily.”
“Forgiving is the Amish way.” Though Luke was still learning much about the Amish culture, he did know that much.
“Yes . . . but repenting is expected. Perry never did.” Looking even more disturbed, Deborah clenched her hands together.
Luke watched her knuckles turn white. Taking care to keep his voice even, he said, “Who was waiting for him to repent? You?”
“Nee. I . . . I had given up waiting.” She swallowed.
He could tell she wasn’t going to offer anything else. So he decided to go back to the night that so many had mentioned.
“So whose idea was it to go to the store the night before?”
“Mine, I suppose.” She bit her lip. “But we hadn’t gone to meet people. I had been sent to get some butter, and Perry decided to walk with me.” A new hitch appeared in her tone. “I was so happy, he hadn’t showed any interest in our friends in months.”
“So, y’all saw everyone?”
She nodded. “When we approached, though, nothing went like it was supposed to. Or, like it used to.” Looking beyond Luke, a wrinkle formed between her brows. “It was like our roles had switched.” Looking directly at Luke again, she explained. “The girls asked me to join them. But no one wanted anything to do with Perry. Used to be, I was always the one tagging along.”
Luke already knew that both Walker and Jacob had talked to him. “So did you stay with your friends or go back home with Perry?”
“I should’ve gone back with him, but I didn’t.”
“Why not?”
Tears formed in her eyes. “I was so tired of not belonging. Of having to live in his shadow. Then, finally, I was being asked back into the fold. I couldn’t refuse.”
“So what did Perry do? Did he go home right away?”
She stared at him in surprise. “I truly have no idea. I never asked him when we talked the next day. And then I never saw him again.”
“Deborah, do you remember anything else? Anything someone might have said that could prove helpful now?”
“No.”
“You don’t remember any conversations? Or see anything unusual in his room?”
Her cheeks paled as she looked at him directly. “I didn’t see a single thing of interest in Perry’s room.”
“Are you sure?” Even a rookie would have realized she was lying.
“I am positive, Detective. Like I have told you before, I don’t know who killed my brother, but I would sure like to.”
In the waiting room of the Crittenden County Hospital, a flurry of activity circled around them. Children cried, men and women filled out forms and looked at watches impatiently, cell phones buzzed, and two television screens played the news on muted screens.
But all Lydia cared about was the man sitting next to her. Squeezing his hand, she tried to sound as positive as she could. “I know it’s hard, but try to relax. Your parents say your grandfather is in good hands, Walker. And we both know that God is watching out for him, too.”
“I hear what you’re saying . . . but I’m still scared, Lydia,” Walker said.
“I know. But you heard the nurse’s report. He will get better.”
“I hope so.” Squeezing her hand, he said, “I’m really glad you’re here.”
“Me too.”
Looking over at Walker’s parents, they met her gaze and smiled slightly. Abby was just outside the emergency room doors on her cell phone. Lydia was so glad that Abby had found her. She’d just gotten home from a walk when Abby had pulled up in her mother’s sedan.
Once she’d heard the news, Lydia had barely taken time to tell her mother where she was going before hopping into Abby’s car. Boy, was she glad Abby now had her driver’s license!
After a time, Walker turned to her. “Lydia, sitting here, I realize that I’ve been letting too much get in the way of what’s really important. It’s taken my grandfather having a heart attack to realize I’ve been concentrating on all the wrong things.”
Attempting to lighten his worries, she smiled. “And what should you have been worrying about?”
“You and me. Trying to find a way for the two of us to be together.”
“We’re working things out.” It had been rocky, but Lydia had expected that. It was bound to be difficult, trying to mesh two very different lives into a successful couple.
“Things are going to be different from now on. I know what I should do. What we should do.”
“And what is that?”
“I’m going to go help out at my grandparents’ farm.”
“You already do.”
He shook his head. “Lydia, I’m talking about living there. Really helping. They’re going to need me.”
“What about your classes? You just signed up for the new semester.”
“I know, but they’re not important right now.” Leaning close, he whispered into her neck. “Nothing is as important as family, Lydia. And being with you. I’ve been stupid, but not anymore. I’m going to become Amish, Lydia.”
She was so surprised, she could only hold on to his hand and pray.