The darkness inside what appeared to be an apartment building would have been oppressive and frightening to anyone else, but to Remy, it was comforting and calming. Remy didn’t care that one of the infected could spring out of that darkness at any moment. Indeed, she welcomed such an event, even hoped for it. Maybe fighting some of the infected would help distract Remy from the sudden hole that had opened up in her chest. She ached for a fight so badly that she didn’t bother keeping her footsteps quiet as she worked her way down the stairs, shining her flashlight into the corners and rooms they passed.
Remy shouldn’t have been so careless. Cade was hurt and would have some difficulty fighting to defend herself if they were attacked. But Remy couldn’t bring herself to care. Not about anything. Not after Ethan …
She choked back the sudden sob threatening to escape her throat as she trudged deeper into the darkness. She wanted desperately to cram her fist into her mouth, to strangle off the tears threatening to well up at their source. She wanted to run into the street and track Ethan down, to save him if she could and to put a bullet in his head if she couldn’t. No one deserved to live like that. No one deserved to suffer like that. Least of all Ethan Bennett.
He would have done the same for her.
“Remy, are you still with us?” a voice asked behind her. Remy glanced back and saw Brandt close behind, Cade’s body braced against his own. Cade looked like she was ready to fall back into unconsciousness again. Remy hesitated before she nodded slightly. It was her time to play leader now. She had to be strong.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Remy assured Brandt, not meeting his eyes. She turned back to the task at hand. Somewhere behind her, she could hear Gray wheezing. She dug into Theo’s medical bag and searched for one of Gray’s inhalers, finding one buried deeply inside. Within moments, it was in Gray’s hands, and Remy was left to her own thoughts in blessed silence once again.
Their muffled footsteps didn’t mask the rustling, dragging noise that came from the shadows to their right. Remy paused as the sound met her ears, holding up a hand to signal the others to stop moving. The sound ceased, but Remy continued to stand motionless on the stairs, straining her ears, trying to find the noise again. Brandt’s eyes fixed on the back of her neck, watching her intently as he listened for what she’d heard. Remy drew in a slow breath as she sensed the fifth presence on the stairwell, lurking in the shadows, standing just as still as Remy. Waiting for its moment to attack.
Remy would be damned if she let that happen.
“Remy, what is it?” Brandt hissed. Remy knew that he still had his hands on Cade, that he had no plans to let her go. With the way the woman looked, Cade could very well fall to the floor if Brandt released her.
“One of the infected, just to my right,” Remy finally answered calmly. “I’m going to put the mother fucker down. Don’t panic.”
“Would be way fucking awesome if you’d stop pissing around and do it already,” Brandt hissed. “Cade’s about five seconds away from passing out over here, and I will not hesitate to slap the shit out of you again if I have to.”
Remy nodded and lifted her gun, taking a careful step forward. The stair below her boot creaked, and that seemed to be the cue for the infected man in the shadows to dart out and go on the attack. Remy didn’t hesitate. She brought her gun up and around, slamming it forcefully against the side of the man’s head. She grabbed him by his dirty, decaying shirt and hauled him fully onto the stairs. She hit the man one more time with the gun and then shoved the barrel underneath his chin. She pressed it hard into the fleshy underside of his jaw and squeezed the trigger.
The top of the man’s head exploded with the force of the bullet’s impact. Remy grimaced at the spray of blood illuminated in the beam of her flashlight, and she tightened her grip on the man long enough to push him against the railing. It wasn’t hard to lift the man up; he’d been infected long enough that he was borderline skin and bones. Using the railing as a lever, she heaved him over. The man’s body plummeted through the air to land with a thud three floors below.
“We’ve got to move,” Remy said without further hesitation. She glanced at Cade to make sure the older woman was still conscious. She was—somewhat—but she looked even closer to passing out than she had earlier. Her face was drawn and pale with pain. “We should go fast,” Remy added.
“You’re telling me,” Brandt said. He checked his grip on Cade’s waist and began descending the stairs again. “I’ll fucking carry Cade if I have to.”
“No the fuck you won’t,” Cade slurred woozily.
Remy snorted and led the way down the stairs, her eyes moving through the darkness, scanning every shadow, shining her light into every corner. Thankfully, Remy needn’t have worried; five minutes later, they reached the ground floor without further problems, save for Cade’s increasing exhaustion, made worse by her still-bleeding injury. Once they were there, though, Remy’s instincts screamed for her to be more cautious—not for her own sake, because she didn’t care about herself anymore, but for the sake of her companions. They at least deserved the chance to live, even if she felt she no longer wanted the chance for herself.
The street was free of infected. Remy had the sobering thought that it was so clear because all the infected in the area were still busy with Ethan. Tears threatened her eyes again, but she banished them once more. There wasn’t time for crying right now, if ever. She wouldn’t allow herself that weakness.
“Brandt, which way?” Remy asked. She fell back to draw even with the Marine. “I don’t know the way.”
Brandt gently dislodged Cade’s arm from his shoulders and, with Remy’s help, managed to transfer her to Remy’s shoulders. “I’ll lead from here, okay?” he offered. “Just stick closer. All three of you.”
Remy nodded and, as Brandt moved ahead to take the lead, glanced back at Gray. He managed to meet Remy’s eyes, and she swallowed hard as she saw the hurt and sadness in his gaze. She still felt the hurt herself; just thinking of the rapid succession of deaths they’d met with after being together for so long was enough to make her want to break apart. She swallowed down the feeling and faced forward once more, locking her eyes onto Brandt’s shoulders and walking on silently.