“The journey is the reward.”

—Taoist saying

Congratulations! You’ve just guided your toddler through some of the most amazing, fast-paced, challenging developments she’ll experience in her entire life!

She has been miraculously transformed from a one-year-old (gleefully practicing her first steps and words), to an 18-month-old (swaggering with the new thrill of freedom and falling prey to wild emotional swings), to a two-year-old (learning the simple rules of language and social cooperation), to a three-year-old (fascinated by people, play, art, humor, and friendship), to a four-year-old (a budding expert in art, humor, and making friends).

Whew! No wonder this has been such an exhausting period for all of you! And now here you are on the brink of your child’s fifth birthday. Soon you’ll be leaving toddlerhood behind as your child knocks at the gates of childhood to begin her long life as a citizen of the civilized world.

Of course, there is still a lot of work ahead, but your beautiful child is no longer a little primitive. Five-year-olds are ready for all sorts of exciting new cultural experiences, like writing, reading, Little League, and lemonade stands.

And if you thought toddlerhood was amazing, just wait. Over the next couple of years, your child’s sense of humor will blossom (Uh-oh … barf and poop jokes are coming!), her curiosity about the world will explode (“Why? Why? Why?”), and she’ll fall madly in love with her friends (“But Mommy, I have to go to Mary’s party! Please!?”).

Your child’s development and maturation don’t mean she’ll totally outgrow The Happiest Toddler parenting lessons. Of course, you’ll use growling a lot less (although you may be tempted to bring it back during the teen years), but the basic tools, like the Fast-Food Rule, feeding the meter, and win-win compromises, will serve you well through all the years of your little one’s childhood. Truthfully, none of us ever outgrows the need to hear our feelings heard, understood, and respected.

And don’t expect to throw Toddler-ese away in a dumpster the minute your little friend blows out her four birthday candles. As the years pass, you’ll no longer be jabbing your finger in the air exclaiming, “You want! You want!” But you will still be using shorter phrases and repetition, and mirroring a bit of your child’s feelings to help soothe her emotional upsets, for many more years. (Remember, even adults slide down an emotional elevator when we’re distraught, and we feel most heard if our friends and loved ones manage to hit our sweet spot when they acknowledge our feelings.)

I hope you’ll look back fondly on these happy toddler days. Once you’re past this period, you’ll have a bit of a breather. The next ten years will also have unique challenges, but you will have mastered the most important skills you’ll ever need to be a great parent.

Congratulations, have fun, and hold on! As fast as toddlerhood passes, the years of childhood will rocket by even faster!