“What do you mean, you haven’t actually been to the Spongy Void?” snarled the Unpharaoh. Blue bubbles and exotic fish swirled around her head.

“The note I left was very clear, Your Radiance,” Cainus blubbered. “I included a superbly drawn diagram. It shows the precise route to the Spongy Void. Bab Sharkey will believe the Fish Mummy is in there.”

The Unpharaoh hissed. Black bubbles blew from her crusty lips. Since Cainus had last spoken to her through the magic wall, the view behind his mistress had changed. It looked like she was speaking underwater.

“I expected you to deliver Bab Sharkey to the Void personally, Cainus, then seize the Beard. Not write him a postcard and hope for the best!”

She pressed a gnarled finger to the side of her nose and snorted.

Now that she was underwater, her nostril fireballs were even more grotesque. As usual, a ball of flame shot from her nostril, but this time it dissolved into a black ball of water. A stream of dark nostril bubbles followed it. The waterball sped forwards, then popped out of the magic wall and whizzed into the tomb. It hurtled towards Cainus, leaving a sizzling trail of oily steam.

WUMP!

The wet ball struck the floor beside the cowering jackal. Cainus yowled as scalding droplets sprayed his patchy fur.

“Yiieeee! Almost a bullseye, Your Accurate Mightiness,” he fawned.

“Why did you not follow Bab Sharkey to the Great Pyramid, you blithering mutt?”

Cainus swallowed hard. “This Spongy Void. The way you described it, Your Gloriousness, it sounded . . . rather dangerous. Does it not swallow up one’s s-s-soul?”

“And one’s body too, hoo-haccchhh! Though Osiris will not tell me all its powers. My fellow student in purple magic built it after my death, but I did manage to spy on her thoughts from time to time, and I sensed some details about it.”

She held a lumpy, grey sea creature up to one ear, appearing to listen to it.

“Hmf, it’s awfully murky,” she grunted, stuffing the lump back into her robes. “In any case, Cainus, your pathetic soul would make for a measly meal. The Void would spit you right back out and then complain to the chef. Speaking of food . . .”

A bright pink jellyfish bobbed past the Unpharaoh. She jerked her head at a hideous angle and – snap! – chomped the jellyfish with her fangs.

“I am pleased I moved my magic wall to the bottom of the lake,” she said, chewing on her seafood treat. “I cast a furniture removal spell to get it here. It is difficult for the gods to spy on me beneath these waters. And besides, the constant invitations to play board games with the other Pharaohs drove me to despair.”

“I am delighted for you,” said Cainus, although he did not look delighted.

Suddenly a large wooden oar swept through the water, whacking the Unpharaoh in the side of the head.

SPINK!

“Ow!” she said. “That is the downside. Those fun-loving idiots ride rowboats up on the lake surface, and they’re none too careful with the oars.”

Cainus stroked his headscarf with a shaking paw. “May I ask . . . perhaps my generous mistress might suggest a strategy for keeping hold of my soul when I visit the Spongy Void? I hardly dare face its purple magic all on my own!”

“It’s your soul, Cainus, you devise the strategy. At least the people of Cairo will not see you, so you are safe in that regard. You exist in the invisible dimension of Mumphis. Mind you, the people in the Void will see you, for they too are trapped between life and death.”

Cainus’s eyes watered with terror. “How very comforting.”

In the next room, Scaler gritted her green teeth.

She’d heard every word.