October 10

Dear Eliza*Beth,

I’m so glad that you love your new name. Are you going to start using it at school, putting it on all of your homework, having everyone call you by that name? You really should.

I want to talk about the stuff in your letter. I’m a little worried … actually I’m a LOT worried!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It definitely does not sound good at your house.

What is happening to your father? Are things bad at work? Are he and your mother fighting? (I know your parents always act like everything is perfect … but what’s going on seems REALLY weird.)

I talked to Barb about some of the stuff in your letter. (Okay. You know that I never lie to you…. I showed my mom your letter. I didn’t think you would mind…. You always used to talk to her when you came over to the house … and you know she really cares about you…. So I hope you don’t mind that I let her see what you wrote.) Barb said that any time you really need her, you can call and reverse the charges. (She knows how your parents don’t like you to call me.) When she said that about the call, I begged to call you but she said no … this offer was for emergencies only. (We are on a really tight budget … as usual!!!!!!!)

Why aren’t you hanging out with any of the kids there? I know you used to ride with some of them at the stables, before I moved to town.

And even though they aren’t really your friends, you could do things with them or with some of the other kids. (You really shouldn’t be so shy…. You are so nice and so funny once someone gets to know you.) But Eliza*Beth, a lot of kids do like you. You just have to call them, invite them over to your house, hang out with them more. I know they’re probably not the kids your father would want as your friends, but they’re the ones you want as your friends. (I just got a letter from Sarah, and she was talking about trying out for the school play. Why don’t you get involved with the Drama Club? You are sooooo good in art…. Maybe you could cross-stitch the scenery … just kidding…. Really, you could do scenery or costumes … or maybe even try out for the play. That would a good way to be with people, to have fun.)

Actually, I’ve decided to take my own advice. I’m going to try out for the Drama Club play … and the school newspaper … and for Future Corpses of America. (People are just dying to get into that club…. I know … I know … it’s a dumb old joke, but it’s been a hard time for me and I’m just getting back my sense of humor.) Really, though, I am going to get involved with drama and writing. I’m getting soooooooo bored with being bored.

You asked me about the kids at my school.

First of all, there are sooooooooo many more of them. This school is gigantic. It’s one of those regional ones that kids from a lot of towns go to. (I never thought about how lucky we were to live in a small town with its own schools. Here kids go to schools in their own towns until sixth grade. Then they go to a school for seventh through ninth grade. High school is tenth through twelfth grades. Whew!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The good news for me is that this is a new school for ALL seventh-graders. (Well … it’s new for all seventh-graders except for the ones who flunked last year…. One of them is in my gym class. His name is Hank. I think of him as Hank the Tank.)

The bad news is that everyone else seems to have come from one of the small-town schools … and they all know other people. I haven’t found anyone else who moved here from somewhere else.

There seem to be certain groups at this school.

1. The really popular “we are so perfect” group. They make me want to barf. They seem to make the “rules” about how to be, what to wear.

2. The “we live in the detention room after school” group.

3. The “we love being different” group. There are all kinds of kids in this group. Actually, there are a few I want to get to know.

4. The social misfits…. There are a lot of kids in this group who I am going to try to get to know.

5. The “A list” … the kids who really care about their grades and spend a lot of time studying.

6. The everyone else group … in case I left anyone out. You know how I hate to see anyone left out.

Elizabeth … I’ve just looked at what I’ve written. I sound like such a snot. (I know that you hate that word.) I really do sound like one, though. You know how I hate when people label other people…. AND I’VE JUST DONE THAT!!!! How gross! I’ve got to get out of this rotten mood.

Oh, well…. I’m not going to let it get to me. I’m going to do something to work all of this out. You know me. I’m not the kind of person who looks at a half-filled glass and sees it as half empty … or half full either. I always figure that I can do something to fill it to the top.

I’ve got to go now. I’m going to try out for the play.

I want the lead … I want to be the star.

LOVE,