Dear Alice,

I didn’t borrow that book.

I don’t even know that book.

Wait …

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Is that the book with a glossy pink cover? A big cute purple panda wearing spotty pyjamas? Gold squiggly writing? AND a ridiculous-looking princess with blue hair, a snowflake dress and icicle wings spinning around in a Category 5 cyclone?

Yours precisely,

Jimmy Cook

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