Chapter 3

Ten minutes later, I was facing off with two Light Guards outside my father’s office. The door was locked, so I knew he must be inside, but they weren’t responding to any of my threats to open up.

“Look, Dorian, I know you can hear me.” I stood toe to toe with the unresponsive guard, poking him in the chest with my finger as he ignored me and continued to stare straight ahead. “I want to see my father. Now.”

“Commander Le Fay is in a meeting, but I am sure that he will see you in a few minutes, if you’ll just wait patiently.” The voice behind me would normally have been soothing, after all, Mireia served as the ambassador of Valhalla, but today it simply made me want to ruffle her feathers.

“Commander Le Fay has some explaining to do,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest and glaring at her. “What’s he doing in there, anyway?”

“If you must know, your father is talking with some of the operatives above below. They reached a water station and checked in twenty minutes ago.”

Hope flared in my chest. “Any news about the antidote?”

“I don’t know. Like you, I was told to wait.” The barest hint of annoyance lent a slight blush to her dark cheeks. “Shall we?”

She pointed to the set of golden doors on the other side of the landing, these ones etched with a bisected spiral indicating the search for order – the ambassadorial offices. My father’s doors had a plus sign engraved upon them, setting forth the ideals of equal justice, balance and harmony.

This was the first time I had been in Mireia’s offices, and I was struck by how different they were from the ones across the hall. My father’s command center held a massive round table surrounded by chairs where he conducted most of his meetings, and an extensive view of the homes and farms outside the city. Two small rooms off to the sides held his private office and a secure holding cell. I’d been told that infractions and treason among the Light were rare, but when they did occur they were taken seriously.

Mireia’s rooms, on the other hand, were luxuriously appointed, in stark contrast to most of the décor I had seen in Aeden. Works of art from all over the world adorned every shelf, including strange pieces whose origins I couldn’t begin to guess. Tapestries lined the walls depicting the origins of the fae, their original planet, their travel through space, and the genesis of Earth from the Tree of Life. The ancient woven cloths brought the stories to life in a magical way that Mialloch had never managed during our forays into the fae histories.

“Make yourself at home,” Mireia said, indicating some hand carved wooden chairs by the windows. The room looked out over the central plaza, its view dominated by the great redwood outside.

“Wow, this is amazing. It’s like you have a front seat to the center of the world.” I walked over to the window.

“Indeed,” she said, joining me at the glass. “These rooms remind me that we are all one. We all come from the same place, you, me, humans, the dark, the light. We all came from an origin steeped in hope. Our ancestors lost everything before they journeyed here, but they never gave up. And look where we are now.”

“Yeah right, look at us, stuck in the middle of a fae war, with the threat of Dark domination looming over all our heads.”

“No. Look. Really look where we are. Standing next to the source of all life. Standing next to a dream. This world is nothing, if not a possibility. We are immeasurably blessed. Every moment of life we have is borrowed. A blessing. Keep that knowledge in your heart, and you can never go wrong. It is only when we start to doubt the blessing, to feel disconnected from the oneness of life, that fear sets in and darkness overshadows our true nature. Everyone’s true nature is one of light. Remember that.”

Her words stunned me.

“I’ve never thought about it that way. But you’re right, I guess I’ve always known that on some level.”

I thought about Rowan, Cooper and Holly. All darklings, young fae with family ties to the Dark who hadn’t chosen a side yet. Despite other people’s warnings that I shouldn’t trust them, I still felt the good in the darklings. But someone like the Morrigan, or Rowan’s father Sullivan Carey? Just thinking about them gave me the creeps, and I shuddered.

“Are you cold?” Mireia asked, ever the good hostess.

“No, I just…I can’t help thinking about people like Mikael Morrigan, and the other Shade leaders. What about them? I don’t feel anything good when I am near them. The Dark, their touch is so cold and shattering. How can you find the light in them?”

“Sometimes, it’s just a matter of trust. You have to hold the knowledge deep in your core. You have to hold the light for them, so they can find their way back.” Her eyes looked sad and removed, like she was viewing something in the distance. “To do anything else is to deny the true nature of who and what we are.”

“You sound like you have personal experience in this.”

“I do. My brother used to work for Bran, until he was captured by the Shades a long time ago. He was very young, inexperienced. By the time our people were able to get to him, he had already undergone months of brainwashing by the Dark. He renounced the Light and became a Shade agent. I haven’t seen him in twenty years, although I understand he leads an elite fighting team for their Council.”

“Oh wow, I am so sorry. I didn’t know that could happen, that you could switch sides. I mean, I thought once you had your Choosing Ceremony, that was it.”

“We thought so, too. But the Dark have devoted much of their time and resources to finding ways to break their tie to the Light, and our own. Their methods are very effective. You have seen how they raise their own young, subtly influencing them against the Light, not really showing them the truth of the Dark until they have been fully drawn in.”

“Yes, Miko told me as much. It’s terrible.” I wanted so badly to save Rowan from that fate, but the longer I went without seeing him, the more I feared that wouldn’t be possible. Since he’d dumped me two months ago, he’d refused to talk to me directly, although he was still feeding Vala helpful information about his father’s dealings with the Shades whenever he could.

“Ah, Mikowa. How is your little friend enjoying his stay here?”

“He loves it. I barely see him anymore, he spends all his time in the tree there. He says he’s doing his own reconnaissance, but I think it’s so safe here, he just doesn’t feel he’s needed.”

“He’s probably right. And, being in the life tree does give him a unique vantage point.”

When I’d first come into my powers, I’d unknowingly saved the squirrel from becoming roadkill using my fledgling healing abilities. He’d followed me home and helped me escape when the Dark first attacked my mother and me at home. He was the first animal I’d ever communicated with, but not the last. The first time he’d spoken to me, I’d been floored. Apparently squirrels had an honor code, and if you saved a life you were owed a year of service in return. Miko was just how you’d expect a squirrel to be – feisty, fast, and always hungry. He’d been a lot of help to me in those early days, running from the Shades. I didn’t begrudge him the fun he was having here in Aeden.

The slight hissing sound of the pneumatic doors sliding open alerted us to a new visitor.

“The Commander will see you know, faeling Le Fay.”

I bristled at Dorian’s reference, resenting his implication that I was still a child, simply because I hadn’t reached eighteen and chosen sides yet.

“Careful, Dorian. I can return to mock you all day while you’re on duty.”

“I’m not worried. I will just set out some blocks and coloring books for you by my feet, I am sure that will keep you distracted,” he taunted me.

I was ready to say something witty back, I’m sure, but Mireia beat me to it.

“Claffsson, thank you for letting us know Commander Le Fay is ready to meet with his daughter. You may go now.”

Mireia knew how to put someone in their place without lowering herself to their level. I totally needed to learn that skill. Dorian left without another word and I thanked Mireia for our talk. Heading back across the landing to my father’s doors, where a new set of guards was now installed keeping watch for the hour, I squared my shoulders and took a deep breath before raising my hand to open the door panels.

I reminded myself to see the light in my father, no matter how annoyed I was with him for what I now suspected was a thinly veiled attempt at matchmaking.

Striding confidently into the room, I took in the scene. Where the table was usually bare and clean, sheets of paper and open scrolls littered its surface. My father, usually as resplendent and brawny as a blonde mid-life version of Thor, looked haggard. Dark circles under his eyes hinted at his level of weariness, and his long hair was wild and unbrushed. I’d never seen him look so ragged. The fight went out of me, replaced by concern.

“Dad, are you okay? You don’t look well.”

He looked up at me and smiled. “I’m alright, child. One of our teams was captured last night, and I have been trying to figure out what went wrong.”

Instantly, I thought of Alec and Ewan. I felt the blood drain from my face.

“What happened?” I asked, afraid to know, but needing the full story.

“We lost contact with Kuan Fu and her people after they went into a research facility in Yanxi. We don’t know what happened exactly, but we’ve received confirmation that the Shades have them.”

Relief flooded me. Not Alec, then. A moment later, guilt hit me, too. Surely there were people who would miss these team members. More light fae suffering at the hands of the Dark. I shuddered, remembering what Mireia had said about reconditioning prisoners, and hoped that these people wouldn’t suffer the same fate as her brother or the anti-serum test subjects in the Sanatorium.

“That’s terrible. But how can these old scrolls help us?”

“Some of these scrolls hold old prophecies from our ancestors, and some have descriptions of places we haven’t searched yet. I am hoping I can find something new. Any information that we might have missed.” He dragged a hand through his hair, and I began to understand why it was looking the way it did.

“But, why are you here? You had something you want to discuss?”

Suddenly, my love life didn’t seem so important. Still, I supposed that if I could offer him some sort of distraction from the day’s events, some mundane family interaction, it might actually be good for him.

“It’s about my studies. Actually, it’s about Mialloch, in particular.”

“Oh?”

The way my father perked up suddenly with interest did not escape me.

“Yes. It has come to my attention that some people might get the wrong idea about us, that a family like his might think you were, um, trying to play matchmaker?”

“Ah, I see.” He rubbed the week-old scruff on his chin and peered at me intently. “And that would be a problem?”

Warning bells went off in my head and I reminded myself to stay cool.

“Well, yes,” I responded lightly. “Since you’ve only just met me, and you know I am in the middle of a crisis now, I wouldn’t want anyone to think you were being presumptuous and trying to set me up with someone I barely know.”

He laughed at me then. “Ah, but now you are getting to know him. He is a nice young man, is he not?”

“Well, yeah, sure, he’s nice, but—”

“His father is a fine man, a good friend of mine and an asset to the Council, as Mialloch will one day be. Is it not good to align yourself with people who can be helpful to you, and to get to know the people who matter to me?”

Irritation began to set in.

“Look, he is a good teacher, if a little boring, but I’m not interested in dating anyone new.” My father’s eyes flared at my words. “If you want me to meet people, fine, but don’t go around trying to set me up with anyone else without asking me first, okay? Where I come from, girls don’t do arranged marriages anymore. We marry for love.”

“Ha, love. Next thing, you’ll be talking about the surge to me.”

“And would that be so wrong? I know you felt it for my mother. You know it’s not just some fairy tale,” I accused, standing over him. “It’s not like you ever married another woman after Mom. So why would you expect me to toss something like that away in exchange for ‘an asset’?”

“Toss it away?” He stood up and gripped me by the shoulders, looking at me intensely. “Are you trying to tell me that you have experienced the surge with someone? Someone here? Who?”

I couldn’t tell if he was upset, worried or just excited. “Yeah, someone from here. But he’s not here now.”

“What do you mean he’s not here now? No one has traveled lately from Aeden outside of the Guard. Are you telling me you have been seeing one of my men behind my back?”

Okay, so definitely not excited, I thought. I knocked his hands off my shoulders and took a step back.

“Gee, dad, how do you know it’s a guy? Maybe I like girls, huh?”

“Siri, you’re trying my patience. Who is this person?”

“You should know. You sent him to me, after all.” He just glared at me, and I relented, deciding to cut him some slack. “Alec? Alec Ward? Remember him, one of your top fighters?”

Realization dawned across his features, and he sank back into his chair, gesturing for me to do the same. He leaned back and gazed at the ceiling as if searching for answers, before finally returning his gaze to me.

“Okay. So, Alec, is it? He is a fine young man. Not one I would have chosen for you, given his background and his lifestyle, but yes, he is a good man.”

“His background?” Alec’s worries sprang to mind, and I bristled at the thought that he might have been right. “Do you mean his human mother?”

“No.” My father sighed, sounding twice as exhausted as he had when I’d first entered. “I mean the losses he has suffered. He was hurt badly as a child by the Dark, and has much anger and sadness in him still. I would have chosen someone more stable, more protected, for you than Alec.”

“You don’t think Alec can protect me? What makes you think I even need protecting?

“No, that isn’t quite what I meant. The connection of the surge is intense. Sometimes, I wish I had never felt it. It makes all other interactions seem…pale. I know Alec can protect you from the Dark. But who will protect you from Alec?”

“Oh, Dad.” I leaned forward and hugged him. “Don’t worry so much. Everything is going to work out fine.”

He exhaled shakily into my hair, and chuckled. “I wish I’d known you as a child. Have you always been this wise?”

“Of course,” I winked. “Tyr-wise, and Tyr-brave, just like Mom.”

He embraced me tightly and then set me back in my chair.

“Hmm, so, Alec Ward, eh? Just wait till Flynn gets news of this, he’s going to be bursting with excitement.”

“Flynn?”

“Alec’s father. He’s been investigating Shade activities in Virginia.”

“Oh. Well, don’t go telling him anything yet. Alec and I barely got a chance to discuss the situation before he left in October, and we haven’t talked since. I think he’s been worried about how you’d react. He warned me that you would want me to meet people from the ruling families.”

“Siri, I’m not going to deny that I think that would have led to an easier life for you in many ways. But you’re right, I can’t deny you a chance at this sort of a connection. Every princess deserves a fairy tale, right, isn’t that what the humans say?” he asked with a smile. Even tired and disheveled, my dad remained a handsome charmer.

“Yes, dad. Every girl. Let’s just hope my fairy tale wasn’t written by the Grimm brothers. I think I’d like to keep all my toes.”