INTRODUCTION

I was tricked into this book. I was asked if I’d be interested in having the transcripts of my stand-up published, and rather than saying, ‘Thank you, but I don’t think there’s any need to do this,’ I said, ‘These words must be written down.’

And who for? For people who don’t like hearing stand-up out loud? I was told part of the deal was I’d have to record an audiobook and then there would be a promotional tour, where I’d read my stand-up from a book.

The only way I could think to get out of this situation was to write something new and so horrifically personal that no one could think of it as anything other than an heroic act of self-annihilation.

It’s scary telling the truth in a book. In stand-up you can say anything as long as it’s funny but in a book you can say anything. I’ve written some things that aren’t funny at all and I feel exposed. But better to expose your absurd ‘self’ than try to protect it. It feels good to have all these stories out of my head and in a book where they can’t confuse me any more. I got them out of me.