5:26 p.m.

OH, IT’S AWFUL, my person-pal. I’ve never felt so rotten in my mutt-life.

Mom-Lady was furious when she found the melted creepy plastic human inside the turkey. I thought she was going to breathe flames and explode like one of the little orange vegetables!

To make matters worse, Mom-Lady blamed Jawjaw and sent her straight to her Sleep Room without any Fangs Giving snacks at all. I tried to explain that it was all my fault, I really did, but my pet humans are crummy at understanding Doglish and they just stared at me like I’d gone loop-the-loop Crazy with a capital C!!

I never intended to spoil the Fangs Giving feast and, even though I’m not one of Jawjaw’s biggest fans, I didn’t want to get her into trouble.

7:14 p.m.

Okay, my furless friend. I’m keeping a seriously low profile behind the comfy squishy thing in the Picture Box Room.

Mom-Lady ended up having to call in pizza, which put her in an even moodier mood after all the care she’d taken with the big baldy bird.

But … it’s not all bad … I guess …

Ruff managed to convince his mom to order a triple chunky cheese and hot dog pizza with extra-crunchy crusts. OUR FAVORITE!!

Grandmoo complained all evening …

and Mom-Lady refused to eat a single slice out of sheer grumpaliciousness, but Ruff and I actually had a pretty GREAT Fangs Giving feast all to ourselves.

I suppose you could almost say that by breaking the rules and sneaking into the Food Room when I wasn’t supposed to … and putting the creepy little human (which I wasn’t supposed to have) into the big baldy bird … and accidentally making the whole meal taste like burnt plastic … I actually improved the howliday, right?

OF COURSE I’M RIGHT!

Without my expert help, there would NEVER have been triple chunky cheese and hot dog pizza with extra-crunchy crusts at the Fangs Giving table … and everything’s better with pizza. Ha ha!

Yep—after careful consideration, I’m pretty sure I actually saved the day.

I’m going to sleep well tonight, my person-pal. I just wish I could figure out when they’re going to hand out the brand-new sets of fangs …