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“So how long has this been a thing?” Pam, the woman with dark curly hair motions between East and me as she slides our drinks to us.
“None of your fucking business, but to put your mind at ease never touched her till she was legal.” East takes a swig from his beer and I shoot her an uneasy smile. I remember Pam. She came when I started my period at East’s house, and she said some not so nice things about our relationship back then. I had always liked her but that day I hated her.
“Calm down, I wasn’t insinuating shit. Only curious.”
“Curiosity killed the cat,” I tell her, and my man gives my thigh a squeeze in warning. I know Pam is a bad ass who takes no shit. She’s a biker bitch, but I need to show her I’m not taking any shit either.
“Don’t let her upset you,” he says.
“All right. I respect that. Don’t worry, East. Your Old Lady is letting me know to back the fuck up off her man. I like that. Known you since you were a runt, Wylla Mae. Always knew you’d be part of the family. I could see the strings tethering the two of you together years ago. I admit, I was worried, but East proved he’s a standup guy. I like that. So, what I’m saying is even though you ain’t asking for it, ya’ll have my blessing.”
“Thank you, Pam.”
She nods and moves down the bar to sling more drinks.
“You straight?” East tugs on my hair and I turn into him.
Honestly, I’m far from great and expected some push back when East announced I’m his Old Lady. I’m not worried about that. I’m nervous about the conversation that’s going to happen soon. “Depends on what he has to say.” I shift my gaze to the other side of the room.
Murder is sitting alone drinking straight from a bottle of Jack Daniels. Staring at him, anger courses through every cell in my body. This man was supposed to be my father. All the times he came to our house and not once did he ever say to me, “By the way, kid, I’m your father.” He had so many opportunities to come clean with me and yet never did.
I want an answer. I need to know why I wasn’t good enough. Why didn’t he want to be my dad? Why didn’t he want me? Was it because of my mom or was he a deadbeat father?
“He has his reasons. Up to him if he wants to share that with you. But none of his shit has anything to do with you. Baby, you’re everything pure. Man’s a fool to miss out on you. You ready to go over there or will you need more time?”
“No time like the present to get this over with.”
East grips the back of my neck and leans in close to my ear. “Don’t be nervous. I’m here. Always got your back.” I bob my head up and down and give him a kiss. A fast peck on the lips. I know he has my back. He always has. He’s the one person who has never let me down. If he ever does, I don’t know what I’ll do. That’s my greatest fear. Losing Easton Reed. Him and my sperm donor share a look and then East is grabbing my hand and leading me through the bar. Here we go. I glance around the clubhouse, taking in familiar faces and new ones. I’m looking anywhere but at Murder.
“Heard we have a lot to talk about,” his gruff voice cuts through the noise. “Let’s take this discussion to my office. Got eyes and ears out here.” Murder pushes his chair back, towering over me. The man is an intimidating brute, but I can see why my mother felt attracted to him. He has strength, confidence, and handsome looks. He’s the kind of man who’d make you quake in your boots if you met him alone. However, I’ve known this man my whole life. Thought he was a friend to my mother when in reality she was his side piece. His dirty secret.
When I was little he’d come over and bring me new dolls. Him and Mom would go to her bedroom for a while. That went on for years. His wife must be an idiot. I know not all men are true and faithful. I’m not that naïve. I also know not all women are honest either.
I glance at Pam as she hugs up to her man, Link. I remember East calling her out that night I started my period for cheating on him. I wonder if there was any truth to that. It’s not my business I know that. They’ve always appeared so in tune with one another. So in love. Appearances can be deceiving.
I follow my supposed father and my husband down a hallway. I stop and take in the portrait of a girl. She looks to be about my age but the clothing she wears dates the photograph to be nearly twenty years old. I don’t have to ask who she is. She was my mother’s best friend in high school. The one who died in a car crash. My father’s daughter. My half-sister. A chill washes over me and her gaze feels as though it’s moving with me as East pulls me along.
Murder opens a door and flicks on the light switch. I file in behind East. The room has a large desk with a laptop computer sitting off to the side. Lots of pictures of Murder over the years hang on the walls.
They both take their seats and I shuffle awkwardly unsure if I want to sit or stand but my man decides for me, pulling me onto his lap, arms protectively circling my waist, chin resting on my shoulder, lips at my ear. “Stop fidgeting, baby.” I lace my fingers through his, he rubs his thumb over my wedding ring. “Guess Alexa called you.”
“She did. Hear she told you who I am to you.” His words are meant for me. I give him a nod, unable to find my voice. “I’m sure there’s a lot you’d like to say to me. I’m not gonna apologize. Not gonna bullshit you. When your mom told me she was pregnant the last thing I wanted was a kid by her. I had no business fucking around with her. I wasn’t a good father to the kid I had. My shit, my mistakes landed on her shoulders. She fucked up and got herself killed because of choices I made. I wasn’t going to fuck your life up too. I made a choice and stuck by it. Though I’ve always supported your mom. Bought her that house. Paid for her car. Gave her money anytime she asked for it. Made sure you had a roof, clothes, and food. Did what I could. My Old Lady doesn’t know shit about you being mine. I’d like to keep it that way. If that makes me a prick, then so be it. I will say this though, you ever need me you can call on me.” He pauses and though his words should hurt they don’t. I don’t want anything from him. I may not have all his reasons but it’s enough for me. He didn’t want me, and I don’t want him.
“You know, East, when I told you to be there for Wylla Mae this wasn’t what I had in mind. But I gotta say, I couldn’t have found a better man for a son-in-law. We have some business to discuss later. Right now, I wanna know what’s the status with Lynn?”
“If that kid is mine, I will own up to what I need to, but other than she ain’t shit to me.”
His gaze slices to me. “How you feel about that?”
“I’m not happy about it but I stand by my man.”
“Alexa did one thing right. Taught you how to be an Old Lady. But I suppose that shit is in your blood.” I don’t have a response to that, and I get the feeling he’s done sharing. “Church in the morning.”
“I’ll be here. We good?”
“Long as you treat her right. It’s all a father can ask for.” He goes quiet for a minute. “How far along are you?”
“What?”
“Heard me. May not have been your father but I know that fucking glow on any woman. How far along?”
“We don’t know yet. Just found out after we got married.”
“So, you didn’t marry her cause you knocked her up?” his attention is back on East.
“Put my ring on that finger because I wanted to. Not because of any reason other than I love her. Wylla Mae claimed my ass when she was eight. I just didn’t realize it till few months back. I’m a little slow on the uptake.” East and Murder both chuckles.
“Phone.” Murder holds his hand out palm up. I look to East.
“Give him your phone, baby.”
“I didn’t bring it in.”
“Really liking the woman you’ve grown into, Wylla Mae. When you get home, East is gonna put my number in your phone. You ever need me want you to call me. I owe you that much. But meant what I said, don’t go around shouting our relation. My Ruthie wouldn’t take well to the news.”
“Don’t worry. I’m about as thrilled to have you for a father as you were to hear the news eighteen years ago. There’s no love loss. Can’t miss something I never had in you. I had my mom and I had East. She wrote me off, but I still have him. I think I got the better end of the deal.”
“Heard that, Cupcake.”
“Don’t call me that. My name is Wylla.”
Murder’s fury lips curve upward. “Got your mother’s mouth and my eyes. Could’ve done worse for you. You turned out okay. See you around. Don’t forget we need to have words tomorrow.”
“Later, Prez.” East taps my leg and nudges the small of my back. Guess that’s my cue to get up so I do. We get out in the hall when he says, “Wanna hang around longer or are you ready to go home?”
“We can stay if you want to. I’ve been keeping you all to myself.”
“Like you keeping me all to yourself, baby.” He stops me for a hug, hands on my ass, lips on mine. “One more beer then I’ll take you home.” We go over to one of the tables where a few of his brothers are sitting. East pulls me into his lap, embracing me like he did in Murder’s office.
Crawl grins at us. “Happy looks damn good on you, brother. Damn good.” He shoves the jar of money toward us. “Consider it a wedding gift.”
“Thank you.”
“Appreciate that, man.”
“Figured we kind of owe it to you since we been giving you hell past few months about when you’d get your head out your ass and get your girl.”
I look back at East and he shakes his head, so I stay quiet. He never mentioned that they gave him shit over me, but I guess he wouldn’t. That’s the kind of man I married.
Some chick with heavy purple eyeshadow, dark hair, and black lipstick brings over a tray of shots. “Courtesy of Link,” she tells the guys, sitting shots in front of each of them. Crawl grabs her on the ass, and she hits him over the head with her tray but in a playful way. “Fuck off.”
“That wasn’t what you said last night. I think your words were fuck me harder.”
“Yeah and you wasn’t no count.” She shrugs and goes to move off as the rest of the table laughs.
“Not any count? Bitch, I’ll bend you over this table right here and show you how good I am.” He pushes back from the table, fingers fumbling, undoing his belt.
I twist into East, burying my head in his neck. The last thing I want to see is Crawl’s dick or watch him fuck this chick with the purple eyeshadow and fishnet stockings under her denim skirt. He dated my mother. I look around the room wondering how many men here tonight she slept with.
The woman laughs and East kisses my temple. “Why don’t I take you home. This isn’t your scene.”
Before I can reply the front door to the clubhouse bursts open and a silver and dark-haired man drops to his knees, eyes rolling back in his head. Blood is seeping out the corners of his mouth.
One word leaves his mouth, “East.”
Someone shouts, “Nickel’s been shot.”
East shoves up from under me as the man falls over with a heavy thud.