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“What’s wrong with my couch?” I stare James down.
“One, babe, it’s fuckin’ mustard yellow and reminds me of baby shit. Two, I don’t want to think about the possibility you might’ve fucked someone who wasn’t me on that ugly ass shit. Three, I want to spoil my woman with all new shit for our new place. Four, I don’t need any other reason, but if you need me to be convincing...” James grabs my ass, giving me a rough squeeze. “Why don’t you take these jeans off and let me get started on an early supper.”
“I mean, maybe you can persuade me to change my mind.” I smirk then kiss my man.
With his mouth still fused to mine, James maneuvers me onto the bed in his room at the clubhouse. He rolls over my body, pressing his weight down on me. “What ya got planned for tomorrow?”
“Mmm.” I stroke his furry jaw. “Nothing till dinner with Wylla and the girls.”
“Better not be no damn male strippers.”
“There could be. I don’t know what Pam planned.”
“Fuckin’ Pam,” he grumbles. “There’s gonna be naked men.”
“Well, there’s only one naked man I care about.” I slide my other hand along his bare shoulders. “Besides. You can’t tell me that you won’t have some clubwhore rubbing her shit all up on you.”
“They fuckin’ know better. Know I got me a fine piece of ass in my bed.” He grins and I scowl.
“Is that all I am?”
“Who said I was talkin’ ‘bout you?” He chuckles as I shove at his chest.
“You’re a real asshole.”
“Oh, pretty girl, you know I love it when you get mean and call me names. Makes me hard.” He thrusts his hips.
“Fuck off. Let me up.”
“Don’t think so.” My jerk of a man cups my breast. “Haven’t got to play with these yet.” He slides my shirt up over my bra and dips his head to capture one of my nipples with his mouth.
I bite my bottom lip because damn that does feel good, but then I remember I’m mad at him. “You’re cut off.”
“You gonna deny me of what’s mine?” he raises a brow giving me a funny look.
“Yup. I have stuff to do if you want me to marry you.”
“As if you have a choice.” James’s voice drops all husky and sexy.
“You keep pissing me off, and I won’t be there.”
“You’ll be there if I gotta hogtie you to the back my Harley.”
I roll my eyes.
His gaze softens. Those brown eyes of his hold me hostage under his stare. “Babe?”
“Yeah,” I whisper.
“You given any more thought to what we talked about?”
He’s been after me for the past few months to have another baby with him. I love James more than anything, but we’ve done that, and both failed miserably at the whole parenting thing. I’ve just gotten back to a good place with our daughter. We have a granddaughter to spoil. I’m selfish enough to want my man all to myself.
“I don’t want to fight with you.”
“Why does it have to be an argument? I’m asking you one last time. Whatever your answer is I’ll accept it and make my peace with your choice. All I am asking is yes or no. It’s simple as that.”
“It’s not simple as that.”
“Either you want to have a baby with me, or you don’t.” He rolls away from me to sit on the edge of the bed, going for his boots.
My stomach drops. I don’t want to fight.
“Honey...” I sit up and wrap my arms around him from behind.
His shoulders sag, but he drops his boots with a thump and grips my wrists. Dipping his head, he kisses both my palms. “I wanna know why you can’t give me a straight answer?”
“I don’t know. Part of me wants to give you anything you want, but do you really want to start over and raise another kid?” I kiss the side of his throat. “Can’t we just see what happens. It’s not like you haven’t tried. Your pullout game is weak.”
“Nothing about my game is weak.” He twists around, shoving me back down. “Seems like you need reminding.”
“You gonna prove me wrong?” I quirk a brow at him. “When have you ever fucked me without coming in me, hmmm?”
“Sounds like a challenge.”
“I tell you what. My answer is if it happens it happens. I won’t try to prevent it. If it’s meant to be it’ll be.”
That earns me a flash of his teeth before he pins me to the mattress and strips me of my clothes. “Let’s find out how many times I gotta fuck you to knock you up.”
I don’t have the heart to tell him that I’m certain his swimmers aren’t as strong as they used to be or that his beard is sprouting some grey whiskers.
James makes quick work at teasing me with his fingers and mouth between my thighs. The wiry hair of his beard rubs over my sensitive skin. “Nothing better than this.” He grips my hips, holding me in place. “Don’t know what I did to deserve such an angel,” he murmurs.
“I’m no angel. But, babe, we’ve sure been through plenty of hell.”
It’s been months since we got rid of the toxic bitch who poisoned our lives for years. Part of me is still on edge waiting for Ruthie’s next move from beyond the grave. I’m getting all I ever wanted. I should be happy, and for the most part I am. And yet I keep waiting for it all to fall apart. For something bad to breeze into our lives and ruin all we’ve fought so damn hard to build.
Can it be this easy and natural? For so many years I fought for him to see me. To be with him. I dreamed of nothing but this only to have his wife at the time shoved in my face over and over again. Of course this was all due to bad timing and fucked up circumstances out of his control. I wasn’t innocent. I know I’ve done wrong. James is the only good I’ve ever had outside of being Wylla Mae’s mother. I don’t know how to accept that this is it. We’re finally proving everyone wrong. My parents—everyone who said we’d never last.
I’m days away from saying those two precious words. I do. This Valentine’s Day is twenty years in the making. No sneaking around. No stolen kisses. Random hookups.
This is freedom.
Me in his bed and him in mine.
No games.
Simply this.
Us.
I stroke his jaw. “I love you.”
“You better.”
“Do you doubt it?”
“Not even for a second.”
James gets down to business eager to make a baby.
I wish I could give him a son, but the thought is truly terrifying. I can’t go it alone a second time. Not that I think he’d walk out on me, but what if something else happens to take him away? I won’t survive losing him a second time.
“Whatever thoughts you got running through that overactive mind of yours, shut it down, Lex. If you got more on your mind than my dick right now, I gotta work harder.”
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” I shake my head and my man stops what he’s doing.
“Cold feet?”
“No.”
“This baby business?”
“I’m scared.”
“I’ll never do a damn thing to hurt you again. Promise you.”
“It’s not that. Its everything else. You’re the President of an outlaw motorcycle club and yeah I’ve always known that and how dangerous it is, but I can’t lose you a second time.”
“Nothing’s going to happen to me.”
“You can’t promise me that.”
“Baby, stop worrying and go with it. Life is giving us a real shot. Let’s not fuck it up with what ifs.”
I know he’s right.
“You gonna stop all that worrying so I can eat and fuck you?” his finger slides back in my sweet spot. That mouth gets back to devouring me and yeah, I’m good. Better than good. I’m great.
I got the guy.
May have taken us twenty years to get here but we’re here.
James switches positions, moving to line the head of his cock up with me. “Fuck, pretty girl. Every time I slide right in its as though God himself has opened the gates to Heaven for me.”
I smile at that because I know exactly what he means. When our bodies meld together, only then do I truly feel whole.