Trace walked down the hall. The meeting with the therapist in Billings earlier today had gone as he’d imagined. He didn’t need a doctor to realize he’d been in a morose state since his eye injury. It was all part of his PTSD. But Dr. Holbrook had emphasized that there was one thing he needed to do before all else. Deal with Nicci. No other decision should be made until he knew if he was going to live in Colorado or Italy.
The therapist made a lot of sense. It was time for a heart-to-heart.
Now that Trace was on the ranch and had spent two full days with his father, it was time to pay Nicci some attention. A month had passed since he’d last seen her. They’d spoken several times since, but nothing had been resolved. His call to her yesterday had gone downhill. They needed to talk when her father wasn’t around.
She picked up on the fifth ring. “Caro—” she answered in a sleepy voice.
“Nicci? Sorry for calling you in the middle of the night, but this can’t wait. Our conversation yesterday wasn’t good.”
“That’s because I’m miserable,” she said in heavily accented English. “Papa wants to know if you have come to your senses yet. Please say yes. Is that why you’re phoning while I was dreaming about the two of us in our own villa overlooking the water?”
Clearly nothing in her mind had changed since he’d left Italy. His eyes closed tightly. “I can’t say yes. All I know is that I miss you.”
“I think not enough, or you would take the job my father has offered you. I never knew anyone so obstinate.” That was her temper talking because she was in pain. So was he.
Trace paced the floor. “Listen to me, Nicci. I have to use my expertise. As I told you, the Air Force Academy has offered me a position as a flight instructor. Colorado Springs is a beautiful city. You’ll love it there. We’ll buy a house and start a family. You’ll be able to visit your family often. They’ll visit us. We’ll visit my father and his wife. They’ll come to us. We can have the life we wanted.”
The silence on the other end was tangible. “But it’s not the life we planned.”
“Only the location and the kind of work I do have changed. We haven’t.”
“I don’t know. What would I do all day while you’re at work?”
“We talked about that yesterday. You can find a job here you like. I have contacts.”
“But it won’t be like helping Papa.”
“Of course nothing would be like that, Nicci.” She was his social princess and did things for him only a daughter could do, but you could never call it a job. Even Nicci was honest enough to admit that. He turned on his other side. Naturally he couldn’t blame her for her fears, but the conversation was unraveling fast.
“You won’t know how you feel until you try. When can you fly over?”
“I’m not sure.”
He was used to her pouts, but since he’d been to the therapist he was more immune to them now. “This is hard on me, too, Nicci. Plan a time and I’ll meet your plane in Denver. We’ll drive to Colorado Springs so you can get a feel for it. We’ll look at houses and plan. Then we’ll fly to Montana so you can meet my father and his wife. What do you say?”
“I say I miss you so much, I feel like I’m going mad.”
He could just picture her stomping the floor in one of her spiky high heels. Trace wouldn’t be getting a definitive answer out of her yet. Maybe never. “I love you, too. Phone me when you’ve picked the date to fly over.”
“What are you going to do now?”
“Eat dinner and go to bed. It’s been a long day and I’m exhausted.” But that exhaustion was of the mental kind.
“That’s where I wish we were right now.”
He inhaled sharply. They’d always communicated well in bed. “Then hurry and make arrangements. I’ll pay for your ticket.”
“Papa will do it!”
“You know how I feel about that. I plan to take care of you.”
“We’re not married yet. He can afford it.”
Yes he could. Benito Tornielli, who owned a company that constructed some of the largest cruise ships on the Adriatic, was a multimillionaire who spoiled his children. Trace almost said she would need to get used to living on his salary, but he caught himself in time.
She was so headstrong in favor of spending her father’s money, this was one fight he couldn’t win over the phone so there was no point in trying.
“Good night, Nicci. Come to me soon.”
After they hung up, he lay back staring at the ceiling. Nicci still wasn’t ready to fly over, which made their conversation more troubling to him than ever. She was a fiery, exciting woman who’d been pampered all her life and felt perfectly safe in her sheltered environment.
The accident that had changed his life had shaken her to the core. To live with him in Colorado away from her family was so frightening to her, she couldn’t face it.
He understood. This would ask a lot of any woman from another country. But Nicci wasn’t just any woman. The more he thought about it, the more he feared that marriage to her wouldn’t work unless it was on her terms, which meant living in Italy.
For her sake he’d been wrestling with the idea of being a flight navigator since his injury. But enough time had passed during his recuperation that he knew in his heart it wasn’t what he wanted. He’d expressed that sentiment to Cassie on Tuesday, and to the therapist today. He couldn’t do that job, not even for love. Trace had to be true to himself. His father had taught him that much.
To work for Nicci’s father—to be under his thumb for the rest of their lives—was out of the question. So until she came to the United States to see if they could make a new life here work, then a marriage between them wasn’t possible. She needed to be true to herself, too. Knowing his own mind helped him to deal with matters closer to home.
Trace left the bedroom and walked out to the kitchen to wash his hands. Cassie eyed him. “I was just going to call you to dinner.”
His gaze darted to the table. She’d fixed him a plate of meatloaf and potatoes, but it looked like she was ready to disappear. “Since you’ve gone to so much trouble, why don’t you eat with me?” It upset him that she felt she had to stay away when he was home for the evening.
“I can’t. I have plans. Just leave everything when you’ve finished and I’ll be back to do the dishes.”
An unaccountable feeling of disappointment passed through him as she walked out the front door. He’d looked forward to talking to her. More important however, there was something he needed to discuss with her tonight. After his therapy session he realized it couldn’t be put off.
His plans to sell the ranch had made her circumstances more precarious because she was pregnant. He hated the idea of bringing her added distress, but she needed to know his plans so she could think about making other work and living arrangements.
When he’d finished eating, he cleaned up the kitchen. Still at a loose end, he went to the bedroom for his laptop. After going to the living room, he looked up some real estate websites for Billings. From the long list, one name stood out he recognized. Over the years he’d seen Hawksworth Realty signs around the White Lodge area and figured they must be a reputable company.
While he jotted down the phone number, he heard the front door open and turned his head. The sight of Cassie brought him more pleasure than it should have. “Home so soon? You weren’t gone long.”
“No. I went to Avery’s to show her the new baby clothes, but she and Zane weren’t there so I came home.”
“I’m glad you’re back early. Since it’s Friday night and not time for bed, would you like to drive into White Lodge and see a movie with me? I haven’t done it in years. It might be fun.” He’d broach the serious subject later.
She gave him a speculative glance. “This must be hard for you.”
“What do you mean?”
“Being back here twiddling your thumbs after the life you spent overseas. Don’t tell me there isn’t a woman you left behind. Some time ago your father mentioned a particular woman you were crazy about. Do you still feel the same way about her?”
“You don’t miss much, do you, Cassie.”
Her eyes smiled. “It’s not hard to pick up on the news when your dad talks about you all the time.” At this point Trace’s guilt weighed heavily on him. “What’s her name?”
“Nicoletta Tornielli. I call her Nicci.”
“I love that name. Italian and gorgeous?”
“As a matter of fact she is. Before my injury we were planning to get married and live in Italy. Now I’m afraid everything is on hold.”
“Why?”
“Because I’ll be working in Colorado.”
“If she loves you, she’ll go where you go.”
“You don’t know Nicci. She comes from a privileged background.”
“Logan accused me of being privileged. He didn’t believe I would leave my family to marry him and work here with him, but I did.”
“But your family lives on the ranch next door.”
Her features closed up. “As you know, they might as well be in Italy since my marriage to Logan.”
“I forgot. That was insensitive of me.”
She smiled. “Then we’re even. What kind of work does she do?”
“Nicci waits on her father, but she doesn’t work in the sense you mean by drawing a paycheck.”
“What does he do?”
“His company builds ships that travel the Adriatic. He owns a huge villa and estate in Monfalcone overlooking the water.”
“Um, that sounds fabulous.”
“It is. I’m afraid Colorado Springs won’t be able to compete.”
“Has she been here before?”
“Only New York. I’m expecting her to fly over next week so I can show her around. But I’m not holding my breath. My instincts tell me she knows she won’t transplant well.”
“Give her a little more time.”
He shook his head. “In her case I don’t think time is going to make a difference.”
Cassie’s eyes filled with concern. “When you’re in love, even a week sounds more like an eternity.” After a pause, “If you want to see a movie tonight, I’d be happy to go.”
Her comment pleased him no end. “So you’re taking pity on me?”
“Why not? I could do with some diversion myself.”
“You deserve it. We’ll celebrate the news that you’re expecting a daughter.”
That brought a radiant smile to her face. She really was a beautiful woman. “I am! I can hardly believe it.”
“You’re not too tired?”
“Not yet.”
“We’ll go in my new car. You’ll be the first person to ride in it.”
“That sounds exciting. Do you know what’s playing? All the years you’ve been away there are still only two movie theaters in our little hamlet.”
He chuckled. “I remember, and I checked earlier. The Amazing Spider-Man 2 or Draft Day.”
“I’ve heard about the second option. I like a good football story. Let’s go with that one.”
So far there wasn’t anything about Cassie Dorney he didn’t like. “You’re on.”
“I’ll meet you outside in a minute.”
He waited for her on the porch steps to help her to his car. On the way to town she said, “You didn’t need to do the dishes. I would have done them.”
“I think I can handle putting a plate and glass in the dishwasher.” A chuckle came out of her. “The meatloaf was so good I’m afraid I ate all that you cooked.”
“You must have been starving.”
“Since coming home I’ve noticed my normal appetite is back.”
“That’s good to hear. Your father was so worried while you were in the hospital.”
“Sounds like you and Dad have gotten close.”
“He’s been a wonderful friend to Logan and me. I—” She stopped talking.
“I know what you were going to say, Cassie. How could I have chosen a career that kept me away from him all these years?”
“No. I was just going to say that you were lucky to have been raised by a father who loves you so completely.”
The situation with Cassie and her father was tragic. “I wish my anger over the divorce hadn’t carried me down a path of separation for as long as it did.” The laser injury dictated more separation, but not as far away from home as before.
They drove into White Lodge. Summer tourists had invaded the place. When he’d parked and they’d walked to the theater, he discovered it was packed. They were lucky to get seats on the next to the last row. Cassie refused the popcorn Trace bought them. “I’d love some, but the doctor told me to watch my salt intake and put my feet up every day for a while.”
“I’ll remember that and we’ll bring our own unsalted version next time.”
* * *
THERE WOULDN’T BE a next time, but Cassie didn’t say anything. The woman he planned to marry would be here before long. Cassie couldn’t imagine his girlfriend letting him get away from her. It was just his depression talking.
After he’d helped her down from his elegant new Explorer, he’d cupped her elbow as they’d walked to the movie theatre. Because she was pregnant and wearing maternity clothes that showed her bump, people no doubt thought they were a married couple. If anyone recognized her, word would get back to her family, but it had to happen sometime. She couldn’t worry about it now.
This was the first time Cassie had been anywhere with another man since Logan. Oddly enough she didn’t feel uncomfortable, probably because Trace wasn’t just another man. He was Sam Rafferty’s son. Cassie had known them since she was a young girl.
She and Trace had already confided in each other over the traumas in their lives. The unconventional situation of them being thrown together had forced secrets to be divulged, putting them on a more intimate footing.
Most of the females who saw her with Trace couldn’t take their eyes off him. Even before he’d arrived at the ranch, Avery and Liz had commented that he was one of the most attractive men they’d ever seen in their lives, but they’d said it out of earshot of their husbands.
Cassie agreed with them. Endowed with dark hair and those blazing blue eyes, Trace turned heads, especially in his black cowboy hat. He looked the part, but she’d seen the pictures of him in uniform. He looked the part of a pilot, too. With his intelligence and charisma, he could be anything he wanted.
His Italian girlfriend was lucky to be loved by a man like him. Nicci was so blessed that Trace was still alive, but until tragedy happened, you couldn’t appreciate what you had. Tears smarted Cassie’s eyes. She blinked them away, disturbed by a tumult of emotions attacking her.
It hadn’t been a good idea to come out with Trace tonight after all. She’d been giving way too much thought to his life and situation. Worse, she felt guilty that she was enjoying herself. Logan had only been gone half a year. To her chagrin she sensed an attraction to Trace deep down she couldn’t explain. It was starting to disturb her.
She could blame it on hormones or the fact that she was a widow. Cassie could blame it on whatever she wanted, but the fact still remained she found Trace appealing. On the walk to the theater she’d become aware of his touch. Sitting next to him in the dark, she could hear him breathe and discovered herself listening for his deep laugh. She smelled the soap he’d used in the shower. It was all too much.
How could this be happening to her? She was pregnant with her husband’s child, and Trace was planning to marry another woman in the near future. Why was she so susceptible to him? Maybe she would feel this way around any attractive man now that Logan was gone. All Cassie knew was that at this point she needed to stay away from him whenever possible until he left for Colorado.
“Hey, Cassie?” A married friend who worked at the saddlery shop called to her as they left the theater.
“Hi, Mandy!”
The other woman, always cheerful, headed toward them. She was yet another female who’d seen Trace and couldn’t resist. Cassie was forced to introduce him to her.
“You’re Doc Rafferty’s famous ace son!”
“Is that what I am?” His eyes danced, but he’d directed his question to Cassie, not Mandy. This shouldn’t be happening either. Cassie was sure he didn’t mean to, but he was behaving as if they were a couple. It gave the wrong impression. No, no, no.
Mandy smiled. “Modest, too.” She whispered to Cassie. “I didn’t know you were pregnant.”
“I only found out after Logan died.”
“Oh, wow. You’ve really been through it, but I’m so happy about your baby.”
“So am I. It’s a great blessing.”
“Of course. You look terrific.” She turned to Trace. “See you around, hotshot.”
His male laughter followed behind Cassie as she hurried over to the Explorer. She would have climbed in without his help, but he’d locked it so she had to wait until he’d activated the remote. Though she didn’t want his assistance, he helped her in anyway, then walked around and got in behind the wheel.
“At least she didn’t call you Maverick,” Cassie quipped to ease the effect his nearness had on her. “You know, the pilot in the film Top Gun. I’m afraid you’re in for it because everyone knows your dad. You’re all he ever talks about.”
“I’m a legend before my time. Is that what you’re saying?”
“Something like that.”
“My father’s the legend. Unfortunately I’m his greatest disappointment, but he’s done his best not to let it show in public.” Since Cassie knew how her dad felt about her, who was she to tell Trace how wrong he was if that was his perception. “Would you like to stop at the drive-thru for something?”
“Sure. A lemonade sounds good to me. Thanks.”
They stopped long enough for drinks, then headed back to the ranch.
“Tell me something, Cassie. If Logan hadn’t died, what were your plans for the future?”
She let out a deep sigh. “To make enough money to buy ourselves a modest little ranch somewhere in the Pryors where the horseback riding and fishing is good. Maybe run a head of cattle. And of course raise a family. It was a lovely dream while it lasted.”
Once they reached the house, she got out before he could help her and hurried to unlock the front door. He was right behind her. “Thanks for the fun evening,” she said without looking at him. “I really enjoyed it.”
“So did I.”
“See you in the morning.”
“Cassie?”
She paused in her tracks and looked back at him. “Yes?”
He acted as if he was on the verge of saying something important, then apparently changed his mind. She discovered his eyes playing over her with disturbing intensity. “Please don’t worry about getting my breakfast or dinner tomorrow. After I exercise the horses, I’ll be out all day.”
“All right. See you later, then.”
Since Cassie knew he’d lock up and turn out the lights, she went straight to her bedroom. After being with him tonight, she realized how difficult it would be to live in the same house with Trace. It was a good thing he would be leaving for Colorado soon. She was conscious of his presence whenever he came near her. Mandy had already seen her with Trace and would be speculating on their relationship. It didn’t look right and didn’t feel right.
No more jaunts out in public with him. When she’d made the decision to go to the movie, she’d been trying to cheer him up. And honestly she was glad to get out and away from her loneliness for a little while. But her good intentions had backfired. Bumping into Mandy had been a wake-up call for her. Sam had hired her to keep up the house, not to entertain his son.
* * *
SATURDAY MORNING TRACE took Buttercup for a ride. After leaving her in the paddock, he put a bridle on Masala, whose ears pricked when he heard Trace coming. “Good news, big fella. We’re going for a ride.” He gentled him before putting on the bridle.
“It’ll be your turn again tomorrow, Buttercup.” Cassie’s horse nickered, causing him to smile as he mounted Masala and they took off for the Bannock ranch. It had been a year at least since he’d been over there. Not only was he eager to see the Bannock brothers again, Trace was anxious to talk to them about the sale of the ranch. Following that conversation he needed to express his concerns about Cassie and what would happen to her when he sold the property.
Maybe Connor, his friend who’d become a legend as the world’s greatest steer wrestling champion, knew someone in the region who’d like to buy the ranch. But when he reached the big corral on their property, it was Jarod he saw ride up in his truck.
The second he laid eyes on Trace, he got out of the cab and started toward him with a smile. Trace, in turn, jumped off Masala and tied him to the fencing before they gave each other a bear hug.
“Welcome home, Trace. We heard from your father that you were coming. You’ve been missed around here. Those visits home over the years weren’t long or often enough.”
“I agree. It’s good to see you.” He eyed Connor’s older brother, whose long black hair tied back with a thong emphasized his half Apsáalooke heritage. “You look like fatherhood agrees with you.”
“Sadie and I have never been happier.” Those black eyes studied Trace for a moment. “You’d never know you suffered an eye injury as serious as yours. I’m sorry about what happened to you.”
“It’s life. When you go in the military, you take a risk.”
They stared at each other before Jarod said, “Life’s a risk under any circumstances as we’ve all found out.”
“No question about it. How’s Ralph?”
“Would you believe our grandfather is stronger and happier than I’ve seen him in years? He’ll want to see you.”
“I promise to stop by and visit him soon.”
“Good. In the meantime come on over to our new house and meet our son Cole. Between him and Sadie’s half brother Ryan, they’ve put fresh life into him.”
“I’d love to, but I need to talk to you and Connor about a couple of things in private first.” He was worried about Cassie for several reasons and wanted their input. Three heads were better than one.
“Connor will hate missing you, but he’s up at the wild horse refuge office and probably won’t be back till dinner.”
“I knew it would be too much to hope for that you’d both be around at the same time, but I’ll catch up with him later.”
“What’s on your mind, Trace?”
“Sure you have time?”
“For you, I’ll always make time.”
“Ditto.”
Trace looked around to be certain they were out of earshot of the ranch hands. “You and Connor have known my situation from the beginning. Dad has sacrificed his whole life for me. Now I have a chance to pay him back. I’m only going to be home long enough to sell the ranch. He deserves to buy himself and Ellen a house they’d both love. With the money from the sale, they can have whatever they want. Their condo is too small and confining.”
Jarod stood there with his arms folded. “I hear you. Where are you going?”
“Colorado Springs. I’ve accepted a position as a flight instructor at the academy.”
His friend nodded without saying anything. Because of the partly stoic side of Jarod’s nature, at times it was hard to read what was going on inside him.
“I’m afraid Dad didn’t take the news well.”
“He wouldn’t. You’re the bright spot in his life.”
“Unfortunately I don’t have a choice since I have to work at something I know. I’m expecting my Italian girlfriend Nicoletta to be flying over shortly. Before my eye injury, we were planning to be married and live in Italy. Now she’s got to find out if she can adapt to living in Colorado before we make plans. As you can see, everything’s up in the air.”
Jarod had that faraway look in his eyes. “There was a time when I came to a crossroads after my accident and had to face difficult decisions. Sadie had fled to California to be with her mother. It felt like my life was over. My uncle Charlo knew my thoughts and warned me to think outward to seven generations before making any new plans.”
You couldn’t resent Jarod’s words. There was wisdom in everything he said. Raffertys had only been here for four generations. According to Jarod’s counsel, there were three more to go, taking him beyond his life span. Trace knew what his friend was saying, but he couldn’t see another way out.
“Your uncle gives excellent advice.”
“But hard to swallow. I know all about it.” By the thick tone in Jarod’s voice, Trace knew Jarod had been through years of torture before Sadie came back to him. “Have you forgotten you were a cowboy long before you became a pilot?”
Trace took a deep breath. “Life is different now. Dad will be doing vet work until he keels over, but with his arthritis he shouldn’t have to worry about the ranch anymore. The problem is, I can’t take care of things long distance when my future isn’t here. Before I contact a Realtor, I’m wondering if you know anyone around here who might be interested in buying it.”
Jarod took his time answering. “Your great-great-grandfather Rafferty picked out that prime piece of land to settle down for a reason.” Guilt swamped Trace at the reminder, but circumstances were forcing him to sell. “Once the news is out, you’ll be besieged with offers.”
“That’s what I’m hoping, but since our land borders yours, I want the right person living next door to you. I’d like to use you and Connor for a filter.”
After a long silence Jarod said, “The right person is already living there.”
Trace knew what he meant. “I appreciate those words, Jarod, but if Nicci can be happy with us living in Colorado, then that’s what I need to do for both our sakes. Which brings me to my next concern. I didn’t realize until I got home that Cassie was still living on the ranch taking care of the house since Logan’s death. Somehow I’d taken it for granted she’d gone back to her parents’ house. Since she didn’t, this will mean a move for her which I hate to do to her considering the fact that she can’t go home.”
Lines darkened his face. “She wouldn’t want to even if she were allowed.”
“I know,” Trace muttered. “She confided a lot to me yesterday.”
His black eyes narrowed. “Does she know about your plans to sell the property?”
“No. I told her I’ll be going to work in Colorado, but I’ve said nothing to her about finding a buyer for the ranch. As far as she knows, she’s doing the job Dad hired her to do, which she’s doing admirably well I might add.”
“I’m glad you haven’t told her yet. Cassie has always been a hard worker and I know she thrives on keeping the place up for Sam. But I’m not happy to learn you’re selling the ranch. Connor won’t be either.” Jarod had always had a stubborn streak when he felt strongly about something. In ten years that hadn’t changed.
“I don’t see another way to handle this, and I’m worried about something else. I guess you know she’s pregnant.”
“I’ve had my suspicions, but you’ve just verified them.”
“Then you understand my concern. Cassie intimated that Ned will be coming back to live with her parents one of these days. I saw fear in her eyes. She told me about the problems with her parents and the suspicious circumstances of the shooting during Ned’s last visit home. I’ve been horrified by the things she told me.”
His friend grimaced. “We’re all worried about Ned, but I don’t imagine he’ll be allowed home for quite a while yet.”
“Then you need to hear the news I got from the horse’s mouth last night.”
Jarod looked surprised. “About Ned?”
For the next few minutes Trace told him about the encounter with Owen Pearson at the Golden Spur. “He’d already had too much to drink when I got there. Everything that came out of his mouth verified Cassie’s conviction that her brother hates her and hated Logan. According to Owen, Ned is going to be coming home any day now for good.”
“That could be Ned’s wishful thinking talking. But if it’s true, then we’re all in for a new nightmare sooner than we thought.”
“There’s more. Owen says they’re going into the feral stud farm business on his father’s ranch.”
Jarod’s features hardened. “So now he wants to compete with Connor? His jealousy is over the top, always has been. It’ll never happen, Trace. That’s another pipe dream of Ned’s. Uncle Grant wants his son working around here, but Ned gets out of work any way he can. As for Owen, he’s been in so much trouble because of Ned, his father would never allow it.”
“He told me he’s divorced.”
“Yup. His short-lived marriage was another mistake. He keeps making them, and sticking like glue to Ned isn’t helping. Zane needs to hear all this from you, but it’s Saturday, which is his day to go out to the reservation with Avery. They probably won’t be home until late.”
“I’ll try to get together with him tomorrow.”
“Sunday will be a good time to find him home. Trace—do me a favor? Until you’ve talked to Zane, don’t breathe a word of your plans to anyone about selling the ranch, especially not to Cassie. For reasons you don’t know about, he’ll want to hear everything you told me first.”
That sounded cryptic. “Except to explain the situation to my father, I won’t say anything. But I’m anxious for the opportunity to talk to Zane about Logan’s death. Once Ned is home again, whenever that happens, I’m afraid Cassie could be in danger.”
“My thoughts exactly.”
“Don’t let me keep you, Jarod. After I take Masala back, I need to drive into town and discuss Cassie’s situation with Dad.”
“Let’s exchange phone numbers so we can stay in close touch.”
“Good idea.”