| |
“I can’t believe it’s you!” Ryley ran a hand through his dark hair, mussing it up in a way that made him look even more attractive than he already was. He shook his head with a bemused air. “Come here, gorgeous.”
He bounded quickly up off the couch and swept her into a huge bear hug that she couldn’t help but return wholeheartedly. Ry might be one of Australia’s wealthiest men, and way out of her league in a social sense, but he was still someone from her past that she’d once cared deeply about. Someone she had once...loved.
“Why didn’t you let me know earlier it was you? I’d have seen you in a heartbeat, Kal, instead of making you wait. I thought you were one of those annoying do-gooder types that turn up on my doorstep every second day. Either that or someone trying to swindle money out of me. I get those every day.”
She laughed a little self-consciously, trying to disentangle herself from his embrace. “I’m certainly not trying to swindle you, Ry. And I don’t know about any do-gooders, either. I wouldn’t say any of us on the program are that. We’re just a bunch of people trying to make a positive difference in whatever way we can. Besides.” Finally, she managed to step back at least partially, straightening the shirt that had rucked up when he hugged her. “I didn’t want you to think I was trying to take advantage of our past connection. You move in different circles now, and I wanted my application for a continuation of our funding to be considered on its merits, without anything from yours or my past muddying the waters.”
She gazed up into his face, fascinated to be this close to someone she’d only seen in recent years on a television screen or in a magazine. The eyes were the same as she remembered—an intense green ringed by luscious dark lashes that automatically gave him a sultry air, whether or not he intended it. Though, looking at the mischievous quirk of his lips as he stared back with undisguised curiosity, she suspected he knew exactly what effect his gaze had on the recipient’s pulse rate.
Yes, Ryley. Even mine. Even after all this time. She bit her lip to stop the nervous giggle from escaping as they continued their combined stare-off. Who would blink first? The thought automatically made her blink and she read the flare of satisfaction in his gaze. Clearly his competitive streak hadn’t changed.
Despite the similarities, there were also plenty of differences from how she remembered him in high school. Faint laughter lines fanned out from his eyes, and thick grooves ran down from nose to mouth, giving his face a harder, less compromising air than his younger self. They certainly hadn’t been in evidence twelve years ago. He’d always been tall, at least six or seven inches above her own five-foot six-inch height, but he’d filled out in a way that proclaimed man instead of boy. The subtle strength in those arms when he wrapped her into his embrace, and the hard muscle of his chest against her cheek, caused her breath to hitch unexpectedly in her throat. The Ry she once knew spent most of his time sitting at a computer rather than engaged in regular exercise. Obviously, that wasn’t the case for this new and physically improved version of Ryley Jaxx.
The changes went deeper than the physical. Caution, even cynicism, was evident in his gaze as he continued to stare at her, despite that lurking spark of humor. In the past, he’d always been so full of excitement and hope. That was definitely missing from the man in front of her. She almost reached up a hand to cup his cheek in sympathy, and had to curl her fingers tightly into a fist to prevent the instinctive action.
What happened to you, Ry? Where’s the romantic boy I knew? Why are you known in the media these days as the billionaire playboy voted least likely to marry and most likely to break a woman’s heart?
Was he noticing differences in her? She’d put on weight in the past few years, mostly from stress eating after the accident, and her brown hair wasn’t dyed blonde the way it used to be when she was eighteen. But her changes also ran deep. Could he read the heartache she’d been through? The guilt? Could he see the emotional scars left by her best friend’s death? Did he know that’s why she’d established Impact, to honor Lena’s memory?
She glanced away, disconcerted by his continued regard. Were his thoughts, like hers, recalling their last time together? It was a beach party under the stars to celebrate the end of their studies, and the first time either of them had ever made love. For that one night, right before he left for the United States, she felt as if she’d finally connected with her soul mate.
Did he think about her at all, over the years? Of course not. Why would he? He’d disappeared from her life to follow his dreams and hadn’t kept in touch. He likely wouldn’t know anything about her, even though the Jaxx Corporation provided the main funding for Impact for the past two years. His Philanthropic Division dealt with things like that, probably so he could have more time for fun. That’s why she was here, to challenge their decision to cancel the funding. The email she’d received was signed by one of his directors, a Gavin MacDonald, and the reasons he’d given for the withdrawal didn’t make sense. She wanted to find out whether the man in charge, Ryley Jaxx himself, had been involved in that decision.
She tried to slip fully out of his embrace, but he held on a moment too long and it became almost awkward. Her heart began to pound, impossibly fast, and she fancied she could also feel his heart beating at an equally frantic pace. But that couldn’t be right. Why would he be as on edge as her? It must be her own pulse, strong enough to vibrate through the both of them. For some reason that was more embarrassing than dousing herself in wine. The latter was sheer clumsiness. The former...exposed vulnerability.
Finally, with a crooked little smile that she couldn’t read, he let her go. She breathed a sigh of relief and stepped away, trying to regain some equilibrium. So much easier to concentrate on the purpose of her visit with a bit of distance between their bodies.
And if it was still a little hard to breathe, as if someone had sucked most of the oxygen out of the room, she would put it down to concern about the meeting outcome. Not to that coiled strength in his muscled embrace. Nor to the delicious familiarity of his touch. Definitely not to that heady masculine scent that rose around them both for a few brief seconds while her cheek was pressed against the silken shirt covering his chest. A scent both achingly familiar, yet intriguingly different.
She cleared her throat, trying to rein in her thoughts to a more professional level. Business. Bring it back to business. “Did you read our application for a continuation of funding, Ry? The Impact program is wonderful, and the team so deserves the chance to keep going with their amazing work.”
He watched her as if she were an exotic creature in an exhibit. Intense. Indulgent. Insatiable.
Her woman bits sprang to immediate life, aching in a way that was as far from business as she could get. Just like that, with one blink of those dangerous emerald eyes, and she was back to being a horny teenager. All butterflies in the stomach and slick moisture between her legs.
Settle down. I’m sure he has a million women at his beck and call and he’s not interested in me. Bloody hell, I’m not interested in that. Not with him. Not anymore. Her hoo-ha ignored the silent reproach, throbbing again in an enticing ache that rolled slowly through her belly. Even her nipples were now standing to attention, the sensitized nubs rubbing against the inside of her bra every time she shifted. Ai, ai, ai. This is not how I want this to go. Kallie swallowed hard, wondering why he continued to say nothing. The silence grated on her nerves. “Well?” She was so tense the challenge came out more aggressively than intended. “Did you?”
“Did I...”
“Read our application. That’s why I’m here.” Damn it. What the hell was wrong with him? Surely he couldn’t be having the same trouble controlling his body’s response to her proximity?
He sucked in a breath and shook his head, and it was as if the action broke the spell holding them both captive. Kallie could breathe properly once again. Ry’s shoulders lifted and fell in a casual shrug. “I don’t read everything that comes in, Kallie girl. I can’t. There’re not enough hours in the day for that. I have different divisions, different teams, who deal with it for me.”
“Yes.” Patience was never one of her virtues, and she tried not to roll her eyes. “I know. Your Philanthropic Division. The ones who set up my meeting with you today, remember? One of your directors indicated in the correspondence that we were unlikely to receive further funding, but when I queried why, he said the Jaxx Corporation was heading in a different direction and Impact didn’t fit with the new image. What does that even mean? Did that directive come from you? How can drug education for teenagers and their families be a bad thing?”
He steepled his fingers in front of his lips, studying her with a thoughtful look. “Which director?”
“Gavin MacDonald.”
Ryley’s brows rose slightly. “Gavin said that? Interesting.” He sank back onto the couch, fingers moving down to tap against his thigh, and a slight frown marring his brow. “And no. It’s not a bad thing at all. Quite the opposite. That directive definitely did not come from me.”
“Well then.” She paused, off-kilter at his unexpected response and having to rearrange her thoughts. He hadn’t said no. Someone else made that decision for him. She’d come in here ready to rumble, and now had to dial down her instinct to go on the offensive. “When I called the division itself, someone there said it was possible to appeal that decision and suggested I try for a direct appointment. Which is why I’m here.”
“Ah.”
“Ah? What does that mean?”
His lips quirked. “Do you have a photo attached to your application?”
A photo? What the hell? “No. But...” She thought for a second. “My photo’s on the Impact website, which is linked at the bottom of all our email correspondence. Why? What does that have to do with anything?”
He let out a faint sigh and sank back further into the leather seat. “My team was trying to look out for me, in their unique way. They know what I usually look for in my female...err...companions. If someone crosses their path who just happens to be an attractive woman...”
“Excuse me?” Kallie blinked. Seriously? Am I hearing this right? “I...I...” She shook her head. “I actually don’t know how to respond to that.”
“Kallie.” His tone was apologetic, but his eyes weren’t. They danced with mischief and unspoken invitation. “Why don’t you relax for a few minutes, and sit down?” He patted the couch beside him. “We haven’t seen each other in...what? Eleven, twelve years? We’ve got a lot to catch up on.”
“But...my application...the funding...”
“Slow down. We can get to the business side eventually, but...hell, woman! I haven’t seen you in more than a decade. Take a seat, and chill. I’ll get you another drink.”
He reached behind the couch to grab a sleek-looking remote off the console table. Kallie moved more hesitantly, sitting on the arm of the leather chaise. Did he have any intention of discussing business today, or was it all going to be strictly social? What is he doing with that remote? Oh. That’s what he’s doing. Kallie’s eyes widened as a panel in the wall slid open to reveal a bar that must have been set on some kind of hydraulic mechanism. The whole thing slid out soundlessly, and Ry gestured for her to help herself.
Annoyance blossomed, though she couldn’t tell whether it was directed at his seeming flippancy or at her own inability to control her physical response to his nearness. Either way, she had the sudden desire to punch something. Instead she scowled and folded her arms tightly across her chest. “I don’t want another drink, Ry. It’s the middle of the bloody day! I have a job that I have to get back to.”
His raised brows telegraphed his surprise at her tone and she took a slow deep breath, trying to remember why she was here. It shouldn’t matter that she’d known him in the past. She needed to remain professional, and swearing was definitely not the way to proceed. Before she could say anything further, though, he waved a placatory hand.
“Calm down, honey.”
Honey? “You...you’re...” She took in the barely concealed laughter in his face and realization dawned. “You’re joking, aren’t you?”
“Yep.” His grin widened. “And you’re just as easy to wind up as you were all those years ago.”
“Oh, Ryley!” Suddenly they were both laughing, in a genuine fit of amusement that felt more real than anything else that had transpired since she stepped onto this yacht. The tension that had held her tight began to slip away. She wiped a mirthful tear from her eye and cast him a pointed look. “And you’re just as annoying as you used to be.”
“You got that right.”
He slouched a little in his seat and crossed one leg over the other, resting his ankle on the opposite knee in a seemingly casual pose that did nothing to slow her pulse rate. Instead it immediately drew her attention to his crotch and she wondered how many women he’d bedded since they parted. An endless parade, according to the media. No matter how many, we’ll always be each other’s first. The random thought gave her a peculiar sense of satisfaction that lasted until he shifted and the impressive package between his legs suddenly looked...bigger. Her gaze flew upward to meet his knowing smirk.
Bastard. He was getting off on her embarrassment. “Okay.” She ran a hand through her hair, annoyed at the recalcitrance of her thoughts. Annoyed at him for leading her there so effortlessly, every single time. “Let’s start fresh.”
“If you insist, Kal.”
He didn’t move, just sat there waiting, and damned if her traitorous body didn’t start to respond to his semi-erection yet again. Her very own lady-boner. Her sex began to ache in a way that made her want to growl out loud and climb straight onto his lap to start humping. I’m so going to hell for thinking like this. He’s off-limits, and I need to concentrate on work.
She shifted from her perch on the edge of the chaise onto a seat proper, and folded her hands chastely into her lap, trying to appear indifferent even if her body was screaming otherwise. “I really do need to talk about the program, Ry, and our application. If you have a look at our submission, I’ve included targets and actuals for the past two years, as well as projections for the next twelve months. This year, if we get the funding, we’re on track to almost double our reach, with a new initiative working within community health.”
He shrugged. “I’ll look at it, Kallie. I promise. But not now.”
She could see he wasn’t interested and knew she should leave it alone, but there was something driving her today that she didn’t recognize. Maybe it was because she’d arrived expecting a fight and when she didn’t get one, her nervous energy had to be released in some other way. Stop talking. You’ll force him to say no if you don’t shut the heck up.
But her mouth opened and words continued to spill out. “It’s not just about the people we directly assist either. I have twenty-seven staff who would all be out of a job if the program folds. They have families too. Financial commitments, mortgages. And they care about this cause, just as much as I do.”
He waved a dismissive hand. “I have thousands of staff, Kallie. Twenty-seven is a drop in the—”
“It’s not a pissing contest!”
He blinked. “Um, no. Of course it isn’t. You’re, well, you’re a girl.”
“Oh, for God’s sake!”
“A woman then.” His brows came down. “Why are you rolling your eyes? I just meant—”
“Stop, Ryley, please. You’re making it worse.”
Confusion clouded his features. “I don’t understand.”
She huffed out an exasperated breath. “Ever since I walked in here today, you’ve come across like someone who doesn’t care about anything. I’m sorry.” She held up a hand to forestall any response when his eyes widened and his mouth dropped open. “I don’t mean to be rude, but honestly, that’s what I’m seeing. You insulted that poor young woman who was here earlier, even if she didn’t recognize that herself. And you were rude to your assistant, who seems to me to be very efficient. You didn’t even bat an eyelid when I told you someone in your own company said they didn’t like the image of drug education. I mean, who says that?” She stopped, seeing his flinch and knowing she was being unfair. It was his yacht. His money. He could behave as he liked.
But her mouth kept motoring on, regardless of her brain’s intent. “What happened, Ry? Back then you were plain old Riley Jackson. When did you become Ryley—with a y—Jaxx?” She wasn’t referring only to the name tweak, and by the flicker in his eyes she could tell that he knew it.
“Money happened, Kallie. Lots of it. Do you remember that gaming program I was working on back in high school? The one everyone thought was a waste of time?”
She nodded and a sudden chuckle escaped at the flash of memory. Ry hunched over the big old desktop computer in the corner of his bedroom, working on indecipherable code. His whooping and fist-pumping when something in that mess onscreen went the way he wanted. “We did think that,” she admitted.
Ryley grinned too, as if he was reliving the same memory. “I found a buyer in the United States and it all took off so quickly...” He shrugged. “I don’t think any of you really knew the extent to which I succeeded, Kallie. Not until later, anyway, when the company listed on the stock exchange and everything went public. It was a whole new world, an existence I’d never dreamed of. I suddenly had the money, and the resources, to design whatever software I could dream up. The PR team hated the fact that I was a fresh-faced student straight out of high school and they wanted to make me sound older, so Ryley Jaxx was born. Good old Riley Jackson disappeared forever.”
Kallie frowned at the hint of bitterness that colored his words. How could anyone be bitter, if they’d actually managed to achieve their dream? “Presumably you’re still the same person on the inside, Ry. I mean, don’t you remember how we used to talk about changing the world, one step at a time? Don’t you remember how much we wanted to make a difference?”
Ryley turned to stare toward one of the rounded windows lining the far wall, as if he couldn’t bear to look at her or anything in the room for one moment more. “I did change the world, love, only not in the way you mean. My latest game is the number one bestselling online choice for fifteen to twenty-five year olds. In the world.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“I know.”
Silence stretched between them, and as she stared at that rigid back, Kallie felt the welling up of emotion like a hard lump in her chest. It suddenly hurt to breathe.
“I’m sorry, Ryley. For being so rude to you today. For...well, yeah, mainly for that.” That was the first lie she’d ever said to him. She was sorry for so much more than that. For making you feel like your achievements are less than they really are. For reminding you that even successful dreams usually come at a price. For bringing up the past when we both know it can never be revisited. “I shouldn’t have come. I’ll go now. Listen, I... We’ll work something else out for our program, so don’t worry about it. Forget I came. I do wish you well for the future.”
Her throat was so tight she was terrified a sob would burst out before she had the chance to finish. She spun to leave and almost missed the muffled words in response. “I’m sorry too, Kallie. So much more than you’ll ever know.”
She’d failed. It was as simple as that. She’d assumed the past could be put aside and this could be dealt with in a rational, adult manner, and instead she’d done the complete opposite. Her personal feelings had gotten in the way of the job and now she was going to have to start again elsewhere to try and find enough funding to keep Impact alive beyond the next month or two. And the whole fundraising process usually took a lot longer than that.
Tears clouded her vision as she stumbled back through the crowd on deck and made her way to the yacht’s exit ramp. How the hell was she going to sort this out? There was enough in her personal bank account to fund everyone’s wages and expenses for an extra two or three weeks beyond next month’s cut-off date when their current program funding would cease. After that...
The future yawned in front of her like a black hole of uncertainty. Oh, get a grip, woman. Stop being so fanciful and just get on with it. Somehow.
It didn’t pay to let frivolous thoughts take over. Logic and reasoning would achieve far more. But for the first time in years, Kallie found herself wondering whether logic and reasoning were strong enough tools with which to change the world.
