Chapter Eight

If Lauren didn’t move, maybe this wouldn’t be real. Like how little kids thought if they closed their eyes, no one could see them.

Unfortunately, she wasn’t a little kid, she had to move at some point, and this was all very, very real.

She shuddered. She knew her face was bright red because it felt like she’d stuck her head inside an oven. The entire bar was staring at her with open mouths and looks of shock. That spoke nothing of Ethan, whom she was avoiding at all costs. Her eyes darted around the room, landing everywhere but on his.

Had she really just told the entire bar, a good portion of Seaside Cove, that she was pregnant?

Shiiiiiittttttt!

The bar remained quiet. There were hushed voices asking questions and the sound of the baseball commenters on in the background.

“You gonna hug her or what?” Peggy finally called out.

Lauren turned toward Peggy and Wendy, both watching her with matching expectant looks on their faces. She quickly took in Joe, who had frozen with a beer mug in midair. Diners at the tables were all focused on the two of them, and the people sitting at the bar had all swiveled on their stools to take in this new drama.

Lauren needed to do damage control. And fast.

She finally let out a breath and willed her body to function again. She pasted her best smile on her face, even emitted a little laugh.

“Oh my god. Don’t worry, everyone. I was just messing with Ethan.”

No one moved. This wasn’t working.

“You’re pregnant?” Wendy asked.

“Of course I’m not pregnant.” Lauren waved her hand in the air. “Ethan, here, wasn’t paying attention to me. I couldn’t resist messing with him.” She took a seat on the stool at the end of the bar. “How about a gin and tonic, Joe?”

People slowly started talking again. But she couldn’t miss that some of the patrons were still watching her intently.

Joe placed a glass with clear liquid and a lime wedge in front of her. One sip. That’s all she was going to take. One little sip wouldn’t hurt the baby at this point. Right?

She rubbed her neck. But when she met Joe’s eyes, he gave her a slight nod.

“Seriously, guys. I was only joking.” She raised her glass in a toast. All eyes were on her.

People drank alcohol all the time before they knew they were pregnant. Hell, she’d been having wine. Still, her stomach clenched as she brought the gin and tonic to her lips, pretending to take a small sip, only letting it touch her lips. But she could still taste it.

And there was no gin in it.

Then she smiled and took a much bigger sip and dramatically swallowed so no one would miss it. Looking to Joe, she toasted him. “This is delicious.”

Joe tapped a finger on the bar before returning to work.

“Did you see Ethan’s face?” someone said.

“That was a good one, Lauren,” Peggy called out.

Ethan. Right. The person she’d been avoiding. Despite the sips of tonic water, her throat was massively dry. At least everyone was returning to their former conversations.

She was staring down at her drink when she felt Ethan move to stand in front of her. “I will get you back for that,” he said.

“Huh?”

“I can’t believe you came in here to my turf and messed with me like that.” Ethan was grinning from ear to ear. “I have to admit, though, you had me going for a second. I really thought you were pregnant.”

What was worse? Having Ethan freak out about her being pregnant or having Ethan be ecstatic now that he thought she wasn’t?

She was going to be sick.

“Lauren?” Ethan asked, his voice dropping. “You were kidding about being pregnant. Right?”

She flicked her eyes up to meet his. She’d learned her lesson and wasn’t going to say those words again out loud. But she had to answer him…

So she shook her head. Ethan’s eyes went wide, and all the color drained from his face.

He watched her for a long time. Finally, he leaned forward. Lauren wasn’t sure if he was going to hug her or strangle her. In any case, he did neither. Instead, he took her drink and moved it away from her.

“It’s just a tonic water,” she said softly.

After what felt like an eternity, Ethan finally spoke. “You’re…” was all he could eke out.

It didn’t matter anyway because one of the waitresses came bustling over with a problem and Ethan was whisked away to deal with it. Good. She needed a moment before they had the real conversation she’d come in for.

“Lauren, come down here,” Peggy called.

Reluctantly, Lauren joined the others at the end of the bar. She was met with high fives for fooling Ethan, who apparently was known for being the king of pranks around here.

Peggy pointed at her. “You’re just like your Grams.”

“I was thinking the same thing,” Wendy agreed.

“What?” Lauren asked.

“Rose used to play jokes on us all the time back in the day.” Wendy popped an olive from her martini into her mouth. “Remember the time,” she began, looking to her sister.

Peggy laughed. “With the fish? Yes! That still makes me mad.”

“But it was funny.”

“Yes, it was.”

Lauren wanted to hear more about Grams in her younger days, but Ethan returned. He stood next to her. Close, very close, as everyone at the bar continued to razz him.

“You turned a little green back there, Ethan.”

“Imagine you becoming a daddy.”

“Lauren’s grandmother would kill you.”

Peggy peered at Lauren. “She would kill you, too.”

Didn’t she know it. That’s why telling Grams would be a very delicate situation. But first, time to talk to the daddy.

…

Joe cranked the music back up and ushered Ethan and Lauren outside, under the guise of getting something for him. Thank god for Joe. At least someone was thinking clearly, because Ethan could say without a doubt that he was far from being rational.

“Go talk,” Joe said. “I have this covered.”

Ethan knew he had been extremely busy right before Lauren entered the bar. For the life of him he couldn’t seem to recall with what. Out of the special? Baseball games on the televisions, music blaring, tables packed.

“But—”

Joe didn’t let him respond. He gave Ethan’s arm a little shove instead. “Seriously, we have it covered in here.” With that, he closed the door in Ethan’s face.

Lauren crossed the street and collapsed on a bench facing the marina. She pulled her knees up, closed her eyes, and rested her head on them. Ethan followed, a hollow feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“I can’t believe that just happened,” she mumbled against her legs.

He didn’t know what to do. His mind was moving in a million directions at once while going a million miles an hour. Everything felt like it was happening simultaneously in warp speed and in slow motion. He placed an arm around Lauren’s shoulders.

“I’m so embarrassed,” she whispered. “The whole bar, everyone… They all heard… Everyone almost… Oh my god. What if they still think—”

He rubbed her shoulders for a moment, trying to calm her down. Finally, he managed to get her to shift so he could see her face.

“Don’t worry about everyone else right now.”

Lauren pointed back at the bar. “But…”

“You’re pregnant?” he asked. “You weren’t messing with me?”

Lauren nodded, a tentative expression on her face. “I was trying to tell you, but it was so loud. Finally, I screamed and everyone heard and I just had to save face.” She shook her head back and forth. “This must be so confusing for you. I’m sorry.” She inhaled deeply. “Yes, Ethan, I’m pregnant.”

Okay, so he’d heard her correctly. Sadly, the entire town had heard her as well. Oh shit, that could have been so bad.

“It’s, um, yours,” she said, casting her eyes down.

He’d never had a doubt about that. “Of course it is.”

Relief flooded her face. “I was hoping you wouldn’t think… Well, some guys aren’t… That is, they don’t believe…”

Unfortunately, he followed where her thoughts were heading. “Some guys are dicks.”

“I know we used protection, but maybe one of the times we forgot.” She bit her lip, that gesture he was coming to associate with her.

Ethan thought back. They’d been together several times that night. An amazing night. One of the best of his life. Maybe the condom had slipped their minds at some point. Or maybe one of the condoms had been defective. Hell if he could remember now. In any case, it didn’t matter at this point.

She nudged him with her shoulder. “Say something.”

He blew out a whistle between his teeth. “I’m at a loss.”

“Are you mad?” she asked, looking down at the ground.

Mad? Oh shit. He was handling this whole thing wrong. Was there a right way to handle an unplanned pregnancy? His mind was spinning. First, she was pregnant, then she wasn’t, now she definitely was. He was in such shock that he wasn’t considering Lauren’s feelings. The woman with the human being currently inside of her.

He faced her and gently took her hand. “No, I’m not mad. I’m surprised. But definitely not angry or anything like that.”

Relief washed over her again, softening her features. He could tell, even in the dim lighting from the streetlights and storefronts behind them.

“I’m an impulsive, go-with-the-flow kind of guy, but I have to say, I’m literally stumped right now.”

He’d created a life form. With Lauren Wallace. He had no idea how to handle this.

“Did you want kids?” she asked timidly.

“I, well…” He ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know. I feel like kids are such a grown-up thing to do.”

“You’re a grown-up,” she pointed out.

“I don’t feel like it at this particular moment.”

“Yeah,” she said. “I know the feeling.”

To his astonishment, tears filled her eyes. Dammit.

“No, no, don’t do that.” He pulled Lauren against his side and squeezed her tightly. “Please don’t cry.”

“I’m not going to. Trust me, I’m good at holding tears in.”

Hm, that didn’t seem healthy.

They sat like that for a few moments, Ethan’s arm around her, trying to offer comfort. The water was lapping gently against the docks. Occasionally, the bar door would open behind them and he’d hear people laughing, shouting, talking as they exited The Thirsty Lobster.

“I’m scared,” she whispered softly against him.

Her words were so quiet, he almost wasn’t sure that he’d heard them. But she pulled away from him.

“I’m scared,” she repeated. “I’ve never been through anything like this before.”

That’s all it took for his protective nature to kick in. Immediately, feelings of incompetence washed over him as he racked his brain to think of ways he could help.

“What do you need? Do we need to take you somewhere? Get you something?”

“Something? Like what?”

“No idea. What do pregnant women need?”

“Besides a back massage and a milkshake?” She chuckled. “Brooke said the next step is to go to the doctor. I have to take a blood test to confirm the pregnancy.”

He perked up. “You might not be pregnant?”

She rolled her eyes. “I haven’t gotten my period in a long time. I’m nauseous and exhausted. Plus, I took four home pregnancy tests, all with positive results. I’m definitely pregnant, Ethan. It’s just not in my medical record yet.”

He felt like a jerk. “Sorry. I’ve never gone through this. Okay, so you need to go to the doctor.”

“I’ll have to find someone up here, since my normal doctor is in Virginia. I suppose I’ll need to have all the records transferred back down to Virginia, too.”

“Back to Virginia?” he asked.

“When I go back home in September,” she said drily. “They’ll need to know what’s been happening.”

A whole new issue just dawned on him. She didn’t live in Maine. She lived in Virginia. But he was here, and he was this baby’s father. “Don’t you want to live here now?”

Her eyes widened to the size of beer mugs. “Live in Seaside Cove again?”

“Your family is here.”

“My grandmother is here, too.”

“I always thought grandmothers were included in ‘family.’ Huh.” He took a deep breath. “And I’m here.”

“Do you want to be involved? With the baby, I mean,” she said.

“Of course.” He couldn’t keep the shock from coating his voice. Why in the hell wouldn’t he be involved with his own child? “This is my baby,” he said, trying but failing to keep the edge out of his tone.

Her eyes narrowed in on him. “We already went over this. Yes, it’s your baby, Ethan,” she said with a bite to her voice.

“If it’s my child, then I want to be involved.”

“How? Financially? Emotionally? Both?”

“In every way.”

She pointed back at the bar. “You only recently opened a bar. How are you even doing financially?”

He straightened. “Don’t worry about that. I’m just fine.”

“I’m sorry, Ethan. I didn’t mean to offend you. It’s just that I make a good living, so I don’t want you to ever worry about money in terms of the baby. I have it covered.”

He could see that she was getting agitated. Hell, people in Canada could probably see it, too.

She took a deep breath. “I think that you need to take some time and process this information before we continue this conversation.”

“I think you and I have an awful lot of big decisions to make,” he countered.

“Listen, Ethan—”

He threw a hand up to stop her. “Don’t cut me out of this part. This is my…kid, too. I want to be part of it.”

His heart rate sped up. Suddenly, he was hit with the very real idea that Lauren could take his child and live anywhere. An unfamiliar sensation filled every inch of his body: panic.

He hadn’t been lying when he said that he’d never really considered having children. He supposed that by the time he did get around to starting a family, it would have been much later in his life—a decade or so.

“Ethan, you said it yourself earlier today. You don’t like feeling trapped. You don’t ever want to feel that way again.”

He tasted a tinny, metallic flavor as his own words were thrown back at him. Yes, he had said that, and yes, he didn’t like feeling stuck.

But the situations with his ex-wife and Lauren were completely different. He hadn’t known Veronica very long before he’d proposed to her. It had been an impulsive decision.

With Lauren, he’d known her forever. Although, he hadn’t seen her in over a decade. And he did kinda sleep with her the first night she was back in town.

Running a hand through his hair, Ethan silently cursed himself. He’d always liked to say that he was a spontaneous person. For the first time, though, he started to see that spontaneity as something else. He was borderline reckless, irresponsible, rash.

His lack of impulse control with Veronica had resulted in a divorce and countless dollars wasted in divorce lawyers. Now, his decision to sleep with Lauren—which he still counted as one of the best nights of his life—had created a baby.

His life would never be the same.

Lauren let out an annoyed huff, drawing him out of his thoughts. He glanced at her, and he could see the hard lines of irritation written on her beautiful face.

“You are suggesting that I drop my life in Arlington and move back to Seaside Cove so that I can raise our surprise baby with you. You, who told me hours earlier that you want the freedom to get up and go whenever the feeling grips you.”

Frustration was starting to creep up his spine. “I know what I said. But I just opened this bar. I’m definitely going to be here for the next couple of years at least.”

“Oh wow. A couple of years. Then what?”

“I…well…”

“Exactly. You don’t know.”

He rose from the bench, walked the few steps to the railing that separated the sidewalk from the water below, then turned back to face her.

“We could get married.”

Her mouth dropped open. “Are you kidding me?”

Was he? Ethan hadn’t had time to even consider the words that had flown out of his mouth. Good old impetuous Ethan. He’d just proven his own point.

He walked back to her and sat down again. “If marrying me makes you feel better, I say we can do it.”

She emitted a noise that was somewhere between a gasp and an incoherent oath. “Oh, you say so, huh? You think marriage is the solution to all of this?”

“Wouldn’t that prove that I’m in it for you and the baby?”

“It would only prove you’re jumping into this without thinking. We’ve slept together a handful of times on one night. We don’t even know each other.”

He was about to counter when she barreled through. “And I don’t want to hear that we knew each other in high school. That was fifteen years ago. I’m guessing you’re not the same person as you were back then. Do you still think Pirates of the Caribbean is the best movie of all time? Are you still listening to ‘SexyBack’ by Justin Timberlake?”

“Hey. Keep it down.” He made a show of looking around for anyone close by, which there wasn’t, and pointed at her. “My love for JT was supposed to stay between me and you.”

Her lips quirked for a split second before falling back into seriousness. “My point is that we’re fifteen years older. We’ve both changed. We’re only getting to know each other now. Marriage isn’t the answer. Trust me, I know this firsthand.”

He knew she was referring to her parents, but this was different. They weren’t her parents, and Ethan was at such a loss at how to handle this situation. He wanted to assure Lauren somehow. He wanted some assurance himself. He wanted to be in his child’s life.

“Well…it doesn’t even have to be a real marriage.”

She narrowed her eyes. “What the hell does that mean? You want to pretend to get married?”

“No, we can get married for real. But it doesn’t have to be anything more than a partnership to raise our child.”

He was fairly positive that he was being nice. This was a tough situation, and he thought his solution was great. Lauren was clearly distressed, and he’d found a solution.

Only, she didn’t seem happy or less stressed at the moment. In fact, if it were possible for fire to actually shoot out of someone’s eyes, he would be burned to a crisp.

“Lauren?” he broached after a full minute of silence.

She put her hands on her hips. “It’s clear you aren’t taking any of this seriously.”

“Yes, I am.”

“Who just suggests a marriage of convenience as a solution to a problem in the twenty-first century? Is that what you did with your ex-wife?”

His ire went up. Now he stood so they were on an even playing field. He met her angry gaze with one of his own. “That’s none of your business.”

Lauren broke eye contact. “I’m sorry. You’re right. Your past is none of my business.”

“It’s okay.” He relaxed. Ethan wasn’t one to hold on to anger. “My past may be my own business, but my future is all you. And the baby. That’s why I really think you should consider my offer.”

Her lips went into a pout. It would have been cute, but he had a feeling he wasn’t going to like the next thing out of her mouth.

“Your offer? Your offer! You’re unbelievable, Ethan McAllister. This is my baby, and I’ll do what I think is right.”

“Lauren—”

“I’m not going to wait around to see what whim you’re having on that day of the week.” She snatched her purse and turned. But something stopped her, and she looked over her shoulder. “Marriage? I can’t believe…ugh.”

With that, she stepped over to her car, which he noticed was parked quite close.

He watched her headlights turn on and then followed them as they drove down the street and made a left. He continued to stand there for what seemed like a long time.

“How’d that go?”

“What?” He turned to find Lauren’s sister Gabby standing on the sidewalk next to him. “Where did you come from?”

“I came to check on my sis. I take it she told you the news.”

Ethan nodded, swallowing a couple times. He was still speechless.

“Are you happy? Are you shocked? Do you need a drink?”

“Yes, to all of the above,” he replied.

Gabby nodded. “I’m sure it’s a lot to process.” She glanced in the direction of Lauren’s now-departed car. “Is she okay?”

“Define okay.”

Gabby put her hands on her hips in a mirror image of Lauren. Ethan would have chuckled, but he felt too drained to laugh.

“What did you do?” Gabby asked.

“I don’t think I said the right thing.” Ethan ran through their conversation in his mind. “Yeah, I definitely said all the wrong things. I suggested we get married.”

Gabby’s eyes went wide. “Marriage?” She let out a low whistle. “You have met my sister, right? I mean, I’m assuming since the two of you have created a new life form that you’ve at least talked once or twice. Lauren is the most independent person on the planet. Not to mention she thinks through everything. To death! She makes a list when she wants to reorganize her closet. Why would you suggest marriage?”

Again, he ran a hand through his hair. If he kept that up, he was going to start going bald. “She said she’s probably going back to Virginia. But I’m here. I thought…I just figured we could…you know?”

Gabby’s face softened. She slung an arm around his shoulders. “Men are so incredibly ignorant, Ethan.”

“Um, thanks?”

“You’re welcome. But I appreciate your attempt with my sister. Even though it was utterly and completely wrong. You need to make up for it now.”

She was right. But hell if Ethan knew what to do. “I don’t know if I can say anything to make this better. Or if Lauren will even listen to me.”

“Don’t worry. I can help.” Gabby gave him a squeeze. Her eyes were sparkling. “Here’s what we’re gonna do.”