Chapter Fourteen

In the blink of an eye, almost an entire month had flown by. At least everything in Ethan’s world was going great.

Mostly.

No, life was good. Better than good.

So why did he have a constant nagging feeling of uneasiness? It didn’t make any sense when his life was moving along nicely.

The bar had been packed most nights. Now that they were getting into the height of the summer, the traffic was nonstop. Ethan wasn’t complaining. Neither was his bottom line.

Plus, he was seeing Lauren, whom he’d not only had a crush on since high school but he was insanely attracted to now. And they were having a baby together. A baby that she didn’t want to tell anyone about yet.

Ethan understood that a lot of women chose to keep their pregnancies close to the chest for the first twelve weeks. There was concern for health and other complications. But with Lauren, that wasn’t the only reason she was staying silent.

She insisted that Grams would want her to get married. Knowing Lauren for most of his life, he couldn’t imagine why she was so concerned about this. It’s not like Grams could force her. Ethan chuckled. The idea of someone, anyone, “forcing” Lauren Wallace to do anything was beyond comical. She was far too independent-minded.

His smile faded. After learning about her parents’ marriage, Ethan realized the real issue ran deeper. He just hoped that he could help Lauren come around to his way of thinking, which was that a baby, planned or otherwise, was a happy event. Something to be shared with your loved ones.

But he tried to push all of that out of his mind because Lauren was on her way over to his house. He’d picked up a couple of BLTs from the bar, with a large side of fries for them to split. Lauren claimed she was craving bacon. Ethan was also craving bacon, and he wasn’t even pregnant.

He heard a light knock on the front door followed by Lauren immediately entering the house. “Ethan?” she called.

“Back here,” he said.

Just like that, his kitchen lit up when she walked in. So did his mood.

She looked like a ray of sunshine in a bright yellow sundress, with a pair of short black leggings underneath. Her hair was pushed back from her face with a large orange headband, and long matching earrings dangled from her ears.

He didn’t miss that her lips were painted a bright pink a second before she planted a big, smacking kiss on his lips. Said lipstick was probably on him now, and he couldn’t care less. He was proud to show the town that he had been kissed by Lauren Wallace.

“You look delish,” she said with a wink when she pulled back.

“You take my breath away,” he said quietly.

A small sigh escaped her lips right before he took them again. This time he took his time moving his lips over hers, enjoying her taste.

When he finished the kiss, he looked deeply into her blue eyes.

“Wow,” she said. “That was some welcome.”

“How are you feeling?” he asked. “Any more queasiness, nausea, vomiting?”

“No, Dad,” she said dramatically. “I feel fine today. Just tired.”

He’d read that exhaustion was common in the first trimester. “Good. Then you are allowed to have this.”

He revealed the BLTs and fries, and Lauren grinned. They brought their food into the living room and set up on the couch. As they began eating, he asked, “When do we get one of those pictures?”

She glanced up with a blank look on her face. “Huh?”

“You know. The black-and-white picture with the baby.”

She smiled. “You mean a sonogram? Not until week eight. That’s my next scheduled appointment.”

“I can’t wait to see the little peanut.”

She popped a fry in her mouth. “You do realize it’s not going to be a great pic. They are going to probably look like a little blob.”

“But we can tell if it’s a girl or boy, right?”

“Sorry, but no.”

His hand froze, holding his sandwich halfway to his mouth. “Seriously? I need something.”

Lauren laughed. “Patience, young Jedi. My doctor said we don’t find out the sex until around week twenty. But, as luck would have it, I do happen to have something for you. It’s not a sonogram or the sex of our baby, but I think you’ll like it.” She produced a white paper bag from her purse and shook it. “Brought you some cookies from the café.”

“Did Gabby make them?”

Lauren blinked. “As a matter of fact, she did. Why?”

“Gabby’s cookies are amazing. Everyone has been talking about them at the bar.”

Tilting her head, Lauren stopped eating her sandwich as she took him in. “Really?”

He nodded. “In fact, so many people had mentioned them that I bought a whole tray and put them out on the bar.” He snapped his fingers. “They were gone in about five seconds.”

“I knew Gabby liked to bake, but I had no idea she was actually good at it.” Lauren shook her head. “What else is happening at the bar?”

Popping a chewy chocolate chip cookie into his mouth, Ethan sat back and savored the taste. Gabby had definitely gone down the wrong career path with acting.

“Ethan? You still with me?” Lauren asked, amusement in her voice.

“Sorry, but this is so freaking good. Anyway, the bar. You will be interested to know that someone has been asking questions about your sister.”

“Which one?”

“See if you can guess.” He ate another half of a cookie. “New Seaside Cove resident, Kai Blackwater, who’s usually the silent type, has asked me a couple of questions.”

“Hm,” Lauren considered. “There’s no way Kai could have missed Brooke’s engagement ring, since it’s the size of Rhode Island. He must have been asking about Gabby.”

Ethan shook his head.

“Seriously?” she asked, scooting closer and her eyes lighting up. “Kai was asking about Brooke?”

“Bingo.”

Lauren’s face fell. “Too bad Brooke is engaged to her ultra-boring fiancé.”

He laughed at the pained expression on her face. “Not a fan of your soon-to-be brother-in-law?”

“That’s putting it mildly,” she said drily.

As Lauren filled him in on all the reasons why she wasn’t a fan of her sister’s relationship, it dawned on him that the two of them really hadn’t had a conversation about their relationship. A DTR, Determine The Relationship talk, he learned from one of his waitresses. They never got back to that conversation after she brought it up on the beach weeks ago. Maybe now was the time. “…but Brooke was always the type to have a serious boyfriend. One date and they were a legit couple,” Lauren was saying.

Ethan seized his opportunity. “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“What does it take for you to become serious with a guy? One date?”

She rolled her eyes.

“Five dates?” he asked.

She snagged a cookie, broke a piece off, and popped it in her mouth. “Ethan,” she groaned.

“A handful of dates plus a surprise baby with a devastatingly hot guy who is the envy of men everywhere and the desire of all women?” He winked at her for good measure.

“I don’t know. I’m only having a surprise baby with you.”

“Cute,” he said.

“Thanks,” she said with a grin.

“But seriously. What are we?”

She sighed, then stared at the other half of the cookie as if it held all the answers to life’s great mysteries. After a long moment, she looked up and met his eyes. “What do you want to be?”

“I think we are dating.”

She nodded. “I agree.”

“I know you don’t live here. But I’m about living in the moment. As of this moment, I think we should be officially dating.”

Her only response was an arched eyebrow.

“Boyfriend and girlfriend.” He gestured back and forth between them.

“Interesting,” she said.

“That’s all you have to say?”

She tapped a nail, painted the same shade of pink as her lips, against her mouth. “I feel that we need to have some ground rules if we’re officially moving in this direction.”

It wasn’t a no. That’s all Ethan could think. “You go ahead and make those rules and fill me in later.”

“But, Ethan, we need to do that.”

He pushed her plate aside and scooped her up. “There’s something else we need to do right now.”

“What about my rules?”

Ethan kissed her as he walked them to the stairs. “I really want to hear all of your rules, but first, I have to make love to my girlfriend.”

And saying the word “girlfriend” had all of his anxiety flying out the window.

…

Lauren was still reeling from her midday, impromptu, sexy-time romp with Ethan.

She bit her lip and eyed him as he steered the car to an unknown destination. He was so attractive. She shook her head. What had been wrong with her in high school? She so clearly should have gone out with him instead of what’s-his-name.

He’d been so freaking cute asking her to be his girlfriend earlier. When he said they were officially dating, she felt butterflies in her stomach. She liked the idea of putting a label on their relationship, even if their future wasn’t completely set in stone yet. And she was still planning on making some rules. Ethan may have thought she was joking, but rules were important to make sure they were on the same page.

“Excited?” he asked.

“Excited and curious.” After they’d fallen in bed together—and, okay, taken a shower together, too—Ethan told her he was taking her to a special place. A secret, surprise, late-afternoon date.

She was into it, and her mind was guessing all kinds of different locations. Restaurants and other fun spots on the coast. There was a fabulous place that looked like a tiny shack from the outside but served the most amazing crab on the planet. Or a third-generation Italian-run restaurant that was about an hour inland from Seaside Cove.

Maybe they were heading to a movie or something to distract them for a couple hours. In any case, her mind was ripe with possibilities, and she felt herself getting more eager the longer they drove.

Then they pulled into the parking lot of one of those massive shopping complexes that held every store possible: home goods, home improvement, clothing stores, coffee shop, Target, an electronics store, and even a gym. When Ethan pulled the car into a spot in front of a baby store, she shifted to face him.

“What are we doing here?”

He met her question with a look of confusion, then said, “This is your surprise outing.”

“It’s a baby store.”

“Rumor has it, we’re having one of those.”

Her dreams of a romantic dinner or some entertaining adventure drifted away as she watched two super-pregnant women enter the store.

“Might as well get started on a registry,” he said nonchalantly.

It was his natural ease that set her off. Somewhere, deep inside her, she knew it was completely irrational.

“We don’t have anything for the baby yet,” she said.

He sat back and took her in. “That’s where the store comes in. I sense they will be able to assist us with any questions we may have. I bet they even have lists for us to look at.”

“I already have lists. I’ve been researching car seats and strollers. I have a whole spreadsheet comparing breast pumps.”

He reached for the door handle. “Great. Let’s go, then.”

“I don’t have it with me, Ethan. It’s on my iPad. I knew I should have brought that,” she said to herself.

He frowned. “What’s the problem?”

She pointed at the store. When no recognition passed over his face, she explained. “You want to just go into a baby store and start buying, without any kind of plan or list or sense of what we might need. Hell, Ethan, we don’t even know where I’m going to be.”

His shoulders dropped, and he broke eye contact. “I thought you would like shopping for the baby.”

Now she felt like the biggest jerk on the planet. “I would. I mean, I do like the idea of shopping. I’m just not prepared.”

He tapped his fingers against the steering wheel. “You have to prepare to shop?”

“For this kind, yes. It’s not like we’re buying a pair of shoes.”

“We could buy a pair of baby shoes,” he joked. “Sorry, just trying to lighten the mood.” He squeezed her hand. “Come on. Let’s at least take a look. Maybe we can get one thing. Like a crib.”

Thoughts of consumers’ reports and lists and research on the best and safest cribs flitted through her mind. She was so not equipped for this. She’d wanted to be way more organized before she stepped foot into any kind of baby store. She’d only begun her initial research into cribs. There were still a few blogs she’d wanted to check out because she’d heard they had great ratings on baby furniture.

Lauren stifled the large sigh that desperately wanted to rip out of her body. Her anxiety wasn’t only due to not having her iPad. This situation was so indicative of her and Ethan’s personalities, and maybe a telltale sign that this might not work out between them.

“Just a crib,” he whispered to her.

As she exited the car and started walking toward the store with its cute little baby displays in the window, she realized this was an outing for the two of them. Maybe there were no candles or flowers or yummy lobster dishes. But, in his way, Ethan had tried to do something special for her.

She shook off her concerns—mostly—and followed Ethan into the store. She couldn’t stop the smile when he reached for her hand and led her to the customer service station.

They spoke to a really knowledgeable woman named Jenny, who explained registries. And thank all that was holy, she had a really thorough list for Lauren to peruse. As Ethan checked out some glider chairs, Jenny even shared some of her favorite websites for comparing baby products.

Then Ethan, Lauren, and Lauren’s new best friend, Jenny, made their way to the back of the store, where the cribs were located. Jenny took the lead, explaining the pros and cons of each crib.

That’s when the tables turned. Ethan started to seem a little overwhelmed, but Lauren was suddenly in her glory. Pros-and-cons lists—that was something she understood, something she could get behind.

After what felt like a brief period of time but, Ethan told her had been almost one hour, Lauren picked her favorite crib.

“Wonderful,” Jenny said. “I try to keep my personal feelings out of it and let the customer make their own choices. But I was going to point you in this direction. I just had my daughter six months ago, and this is the crib we got. My husband and I love it.”

That gave Lauren peace of mind. She grinned up at Ethan, who handed over a credit card. “Ring it up,” he said.

“I can get it,” Lauren said, reaching for the denim satchel purse she’d brought along today.

Ethan put his hand over it. “No, I want to do this.”

Lauren didn’t feel it was fair to Ethan for him to cover 100 percent of the cost of the crib, but she sensed that it meant a lot to him. And besides, there were plenty of other things she needed to buy yet. She nodded and let him handle all the details. As she walked around the rocking chairs and gliders, she decided it was actually kind of nice to have someone else take care of her for a change. Not that she didn’t delight in being the provider for her family and friends.

Ethan returned from the checkout station when his phone rang. His face lit up. “Oh man, I haven’t talked to him in forever.”

“Take the call.”

“But…” He gestured toward Jenny, who was still clicking keys on her computer.

“Seriously, I got this if she has any questions. Go talk to your friend.”

Since Jenny didn’t appear to be in any hurry to ring up their transaction, she settled back on one of the gliders, put her feet up, and watched Ethan. He was gesturing excitedly as he paced around the stroller section, smiling and laughing.

Lauren sat back and closed her eyes. She loved the crib they picked. It would look really cute in…Lauren’s eyes flew open as she put a hand to her mouth. Where would this crib go? Her condo was in Virginia. Ethan’s house was in Maine.

Once again, she looked to Ethan, still on the phone. Their locations weren’t the only difference between them. Take today, coming to this store. Ethan brought her here on a whim, while Lauren would have preferred to prepare for something like crib shopping. It was mere luck that they got a knowledgeable salesperson.

She really needed to start putting some concerted thought into where she was going to live and how sharing a baby with Ethan would work. They couldn’t just raise a baby on a whim.

She gulped as anxiety flooded her. Breathe, she told herself. They’d just decided they were in a relationship. That was a positive step forward for Ethan. He wasn’t going anywhere.

“Alaska! Oh man, I’ve wanted to live in Alaska for a long time.”

Her mouth fell open. Alaska, what now?

She dropped her legs off the accompanying stool and sat up straight. Ethan was running his hand along one of the receiving blankets near her. She couldn’t help but overhear.

“No, I’d be perfect for that job. In fact, I’ve been managing this bar, so I have a ton of experience to bring to the table.”

Managing a bar? More like owning a bar. Being responsible for employees, vendors, patrons. Responsible, in general. Stable. Stationary—as in living in Seaside Cove and buying cribs and asking women to be his girlfriend. Not running around the world with a serious case of wanderlust.

She could feel her pulse picking up. Panic was starting to grip her tightly, and her breathing was becoming labored. As she usually did to calm herself, she whipped out her phone and started making a list. She glanced around the store for an idea. Other nursery accessories. Perfect.

But she couldn’t concentrate as Ethan waltzed by her, laughing again with whoever that was. This person who was offering him a way out of Maine. A way to abandon her and leave all the baby research firmly in her hands.

“I’ll think about it,” he said. “I’m really glad you reached out.”

He was? Her heart dropped.

…

Ethan ended the call and shoved his phone into his pocket. When he turned, he found Lauren watching him with a horrified expression on her face. She’d gone pale, and it looked like her hand was shaking.

He was at her side in a split second. He pushed her hair off her face. “Hey, what’s going on? Are you feeling okay?” He gulped, his heart rate quickly climbing. “The baby?”

Lightly, she shook her head. “I feel fine. The baby’s fine.”

“Are you hungry? Did your blood sugar drop? You’re so pale. We’ve been here a long time. We need to get you something to eat. Or are you nauseous? You’ve been doing better with the morning sickness. Do you need to run to the bathroom?”

“I feel fine, Ethan,” she snapped.

He stood quickly. What was going on?

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Alaska,” she said with great emphasis and wide eyes.

And that’s when it dawned on him. She’d overheard his call. He pushed a hand through his hair. From her vantage point, it would have sounded like he was making plans to move to the Last Frontier.

Bobby had presented an intriguing opportunity, though. Ethan couldn’t deny that. But there was more to the story.

He sat down on the stool in front of her. “That was my friend, Bobby. He’s starting a chain of restaurants and bars.”

“In Alaska,” she repeated.

“In Alaska,” he confirmed.

She rested back on the glider, her gaze trending downward toward her clenched hands.

“Listen, Lauren, I’m more than likely never going to work in Alaska.”

She didn’t meet his eyes. “More than likely.” Her face was set. “But maybe.”

“My friend Bobby is amazing. A great guy. But most of his ideas and ventures never come to fruition.”

“But some do?”

He leaned toward her so that he could get her to actually look him in the eyes. “Some do, yes.”

“If this Alaska idea actually worked out, you would go.” It wasn’t a question.

“I would…” He trailed off because he honestly didn’t know.

He was currently in a baby store with a woman he’d wanted for at least half of his life, shopping for a crib for their baby.

No way would he abandon her with their child. At the same time, it was a very real option that she would return to Virginia, despite the fact that he had the feeling she was starting to enjoy being in Maine near her family.

If she did leave Seaside Cove, they would be coparenting from different states anyway.

She sat forward, her sad eyes suddenly turning determined and direct. “Ethan, you own a bar. If some other job opportunity comes up and tickles your fancy, what are you planning on doing with The Thirsty Lobster?”

“My goal is to set The Thirsty Lobster up for success. I would never leave it in poor hands with someone who didn’t see its awesome qualities. Someone who wouldn’t take care of it.”

“You would sell it?” she asked.

He couldn’t say for sure. He didn’t like the idea of someone else taking control of The Thirsty Lobster. He was attached. More than he wanted to admit. “I might just hire a great manager. Someone trustworthy and knowledgeable.”

The small amount of color that had returned to her face disappeared again. “You really would up and leave, wouldn’t you?”

He didn’t answer her because he didn’t know what to say. Or even what he felt. He’d liked shopping for the crib with her. He liked getting to see her all the time. His favorite part of the day was when they told each other what they’d done that day.

Still, there was another part of him that feared staying in one place too long. Dreaded the idea of making decisions based on the wants of another person, rather than his own desires. He’d learned the hard way how wrong that could go.

He realized there was nothing he could say to assuage her anxiety. For once, his usual laid-back attitude was being tested. He’d wanted to live in Alaska for a long time. But he’d also wanted Lauren for a long time.

He loved the bar. Even if it wasn’t the forty-ninth state, he loved Maine, too. Seaside Cove would always be home. After being away from it for so many years, he was truly enjoying being back in town, interacting with the community, and catching up with old friends.

But deep down, there was a tingling that always reminded him of his desire to travel, experience new things, make the most of life.

“Hey,” he said softly, trying his best to comfort. “Why don’t we get out of here and get something to eat?”

“But—” she began.

“Lauren, I’m not moving to Alaska any time soon.” At least, he didn’t think he was. “This is nothing for you to worry about today. I promise.”

Although, he didn’t know that. As they walked out of the store, he knew the bliss they’d been experiencing for the last couple weeks may have come to an end. The honeymoon period was over. In its place were the hard decisions of life.

Unfortunately, Ethan had no idea what was going to happen. Usually, he thrived on that. But today, for the first time, the unknown made him feel extremely uneasy.