Chapter Sixty Four

Henry was working on a framing order when he felt a presence. He looked up and was startled to see Jenny standing at the doorway that led to the café side.

“Jenny! It’s so good to see you! What brings you here?”

Henry put down the mat board sample he was holding and walked over to the love of his life. Unbidden tears were sitting on the edge of her eyelids and it took only one more blink for the tears to begin sliding down Jenny’s cheeks. Henry knew what might be troubling her, but he so desired to kiss her and hold her that everything else could wait. They warmly embraced and kissed tenderly.

“Come, let’s sit down.” Henry led her to the bay window in the back section of the café. A few patrons were having coffee in the front section. They could vaguely be heard but not seen from that area. They sat at a table for two and immediately reached out their hands to each other. They gazed into each other’s eyes for the longest moment and then Henry asked, “What’s wrong, Jenny?”

He knew what it might be troubling his sweetheart, but hoped that his assumptions were wrong.

They were right!

“It’s James, Henry. He wants me to come back. Late yesterday, his mother, Nancy, called and pleaded with me to come as well. Apparently, James’ condition, although stable, is not very good; he should be in the hospital but refuses to go. He is adamant that I return and wants to see me on the estate again before he will agree to be admitted to the hospital.”

Henry squeezed Jenny’s hands and shook his head. “That puts so much pressure on you, honey…what do you want to do?”

“That’s why I’m here. I want and need your input.”

A concerned look grew on Henry’s face, “Your marriage with James was never fulfilling and he was the one that divorced you…are you sure you want to go back and…this would be just temporary, wouldn’t it?”

Jenny slightly shrugged her shoulders and nodded. “Yes, that’s what I’m thinking…to just take one day at a time. Our marriage was so one sided and he was rarely at home. Yet, I know he could use my support. When I lay in the hospital for days on end, friends came to see me, but I would have loved if family came. And when my son did come, it was such a whirlwind visit. That was also the time he put my house up for sale and…he was so unfriendly towards me. That’s another reason, as we discussed before, that I want to go and see if we can patch things up.”

“If this didn’t involve family, I would fight tooth and nail to keep you here, but with family and James’ illness…” Henry shook his head and continued, “As much as I don’t want to say this, I think you have to go, Jen. Our relationship would always have something between us if you didn’t go. You’re the kind of person that would feel regret and guilt for not reaching out…and, he was your husband.”

“James has had such a difficult upbringing. To many it may appear he has the world on a string with his wealth and power, but what he needs most is to be accepted and loved.”

For the next half hour, Jenny shared with Henry, James’ background: his mother’s alcohol addiction and never being there for him and his twin brother, the cold business nature of his father and the feelings of abandonment James felt when his mother died and guilt over his brother’s suicide.

“The last thing James needs right now is to feel abandoned and alone. The staff on the estate notice such a change in him and so do I. It took years for James to find himself and—”

“I’ve seen it in others and those who I counselled in the past; there are so many who are crippled in this area of giving and receiving affection. Many do not know what to do, how to show it, how to begin. We, who are more blessed, either due to our upbringing, or by nature, must be understanding and compassionate and help lead…”

“Oh, Henry, we all want to love and be loved. I think it was learning of James’ background that was part of my motivation to marry James.”

Henry shook his head and allowed his compassionate side take over, “I can see why you don’t want to abandon him now and encourage him in that direction so that he does not lose hope…”

Henry shrugged his shoulders, “And I understand you want to be supportive in his illness, but…Jen, you have to come to terms with your son and James and the entire family for us to have a relationship that is not encumbered with all these unsettled issues. You would always feel torn between our family and yours. I love you too much to see you unhappy in any way. You have my blessings and support to go back and do what you need you to do.”

“Oh, Henry, that is what I have always loved about you. You have left me free. I recall that day in the park when we could have made love, but you considered my feelings above yours. I was sorry we didn’t and yet I felt so free afterwards that you didn’t force me to make a decision that I would regret later. And here again, you offer me that same freedom…your love is so wonderful…It reminds me of a saying. ‘If you love someone, set them free. If they come back to you, they are yours. If they don’t come back, they never were’…”

They both leaned forward over the table top and tenderly kissed.

Although Henry was putting on a brave front, his heart was already aching. He never anticipated this to happen after they both were miraculously brought back to life. He thought for certain they would be married and already living together and suddenly all of these obstacles popped up!

Jenny gazed at her dear Henry, so thankful that he understood. She nodded and tears surfaced in her eyes again. “I know he needs me, Henry. I have to go and… I feel it’s God’s will somehow and part of His plan for us to bring our families together.”

“Well, God is the God of all possibilities…you never know.”

Henry stared at Jenny trying to burn the image of her in his mind and heart. He didn’t know if he could possibly live without Jenny, he was missing her already. “I suppose you will be going alone? You don’t want me to come along anymore, do you…?”

Jenny shook her head, “No, I think it’s better I go alone. I don’t know how long I will be there and your presence might complicate any kind of reconciliation with J.J. at this point and…somehow, I feel being with James for a few days might be the way to reach J.J.”

Henry nodded, “I think you’re right, Jen. So when do you plan to leave?” He hoped it would be never.

“I will call Air Canada as soon as I get home and see if there is a flight out this Saturday morning.”

“That’s just a couple of days…Oh, Jen, I will miss you so much…” Unbidden tears surfaced in Henry’s eyes. He was too choked up to say more.

Jenny brushed away a tear sliding down her cheeks. “Camilla is coming over this afternoon for awhile. I’ll pack later so that I can have tomorrow off. Perhaps we can spend the day together.”

Just then as she spoke, her every word filled Henry with sadness over her impending departure. He thought his heart would explode.

Neither wanted to get up and part. They just tenderly held hands and continued to gaze at one another. If it hadn’t been for a customer wishing to see Henry, they may have gone on that way for the rest of day…

Henry turned to the framer, “Be right there.” Turning back to Jenny, he shrugged his shoulders, “Well, honey, perhaps phone me later when you have everything settled and under control. I may drop by on my way home for a bit as well.”

“Oh, yes, please do, Henry.”

They got up and embraced one another and tenderly kissed.

“Love you with all my heart, honey. See you later…”

Jenny shook her head side to side, “I love you more, Henry.”