“Now Laban had two daughters. The older daughter was named Leah, and the younger one was Rachel.” GENESIS 29:16

Sibling Rivalry Gen 29:16-30

If you have a sister or brother, you’ve probably known the angst of sibling rivalry. For sisters Leah and Rachel, it was inevitable for a number of reasons. Leah, the elder, wasn’t as beautiful as Rachel. According to tradition, Leah should have married before her younger sister, but their cousin Jacob fell in love with Rachel. He even agreed to work seven years to make her his wife. Unfortunately, their father tricked Jacob, and Jacob found himself married to Leah before Rachel. To make matters worse, Rachel was barren for many years while Leah gave Jacob many sons in hopes of gaining his love.

Is it any wonder this triangle evoked a bitter rivalry between these women that led to years of heartache and despair? Their story in Genesis 29–30 reads more like a television soap opera than the bloodline of the coming Messiah. Sadly, jealousy and intense competition between siblings is still common in today’s families and can intensify when one has a disability. Caring for a family member with special needs requires time and attention, leaving siblings vying for their parents’ love. Family finances can be stretched, causing siblings to go without wants and needs. Some feel sorry for their disabled brother or sister, but angry at the same time. Some grow up with great compassion and become lifelong advocates for those with disabilities. Others move out of their homes as soon as they can and feel like failures for their inability to cope with the family stress.

What makes the difference? Love! Jacob was wrong to shut Leah out of his heart, and the sisters’ response only made things worse. If they each had been as focused on loving one another instead of only their own desires, a lot of pain and heartache would have been avoided.

As a sibling, you can communicate your needs to parents, grandparents, and friends. You can safeguard your heart from bitterness by praying about God’s perfect plan for your own life and your sibling’s life. God will never withhold his love from you and will always forgive you—especially when things are far from perfect.