by Lisa Larkin
CEDAR’S MOST INCREDIBLE BIRTH!
My pregnancy with Cedar was amazing. I felt really good, exercised lots, was obsessed with eating really good food, and drank copious amounts of red raspberry leaf tea to benefit my uterus. I spent huge amounts of time navel gazing in complete awe of my swelling belly and was just so very excited to meet the little creature inside of me (at times it was so hard to believe that there was actually a perfect little human in there)!
At about thirty-six weeks’ gestation—a month before I was due—I woke to a trickle of fluid and realized my water was leaking. As excited as I was to meet him, I was not expecting it so soon. This of course was a little worrisome for me, it being so early. Also, I so wanted to have him at home, which was about forty-five minutes outside of Nelson, in the Kootenay Mountains. My wonderful midwife Donna didn’t think it was necessary to go to the hospital, but thought it would be a good idea to be in town, just to be on the safe side. So we packed up and went to a friend’s place in Nelson and started the rather long and rather stressful waiting game, praying I would go into labor sooner rather than later. Because of the risk of infection after the water breaks, the sooner the labor commenced the better.
However, before he was even born, Cedar was testing his mom’s patience (hee hee!). He was not quite ready. He just chilled right out. For days, I was trickling amniotic fluid, couldn’t have a bath, was living on vitamin C and echinacea (to prevent infection), and was just waiting, waiting, waiting for something to happen. My midwife pressed acupressure points to induce labor and I took castor oil (yuck!), but still after purging everything except the baby—nothing!
Four days after my water broke, I decided to just get out and walk. That particular day, I had so much energy that I felt I could climb a mountain—so I did! Cedar’s dad, Tony, and I spent the day hiking. I felt so strong and powerful! We took pictures and just enjoyed a sunny but crisp Kootenay winter day. It was so incredibly beautiful with little hints of spring in the air, and I was filled with the excitement that soon I was going to meet my baby.
We got back to the cozy little place where we were staying and not long after, I started feeling something—some cramping in my lower back. Hooray! The sensations were coming and going and yep, I was sure they were signs that I was in labor. Yippee! It felt so good! So we called the midwives and they said they would be on their way in an hour or two. They figured, with it being my first baby, they would have some time.
Well, Cedar had other plans! The sensations in my back were getting stronger and stronger, and things were getting intense rather fast. I decided a shower might be a good idea, so I got in and it felt ohhh so amazing. The heat was perfect. I spent a fair bit of time in there (maybe a half hour or so), toning and breathing through the waves of intensity. When the contractions didn’t seem to have any break in between, and when I felt like I had to have a bowel movement, I got out and sat on the toilet, and had a little bit of a breakdown. It was so intense and I had a few moments feeling I really couldn’t do it anymore (classic signs that I was in transition, which I didn’t know at the time). The feeling that I had to have a bowel movement was so strong—and then lo and behold there was his head, almost crowning! Tony was there with me and we called out to Sparrow (our friend and lovely host), “THE BABY’S COMING! QUICK!” So they helped me out of the bathroom into the living room to a blanket on the floor. There was really nothing I could do to stop the urge to push and with me on my hands and knees, in two rather fierce pushes and with a very loud roar, out he came (or maybe a better word, out he shot!) into Sparrow’s arms and then there he was in mine. Oh My God! I had had a baby and so darned fast (in less than two hours)!
Now, you would think one would be rather terrified by this next part. He was blue and not breathing—but there was just this knowing that he was going to be OK and I wasn’t afraid. I just held him and talked to him and massaged him and then, very quick-thinking Sparrow got a bowl of cold water and put his feet in it and thank the heavens and all the angels he breathed and went pink and cried. Oh My Goddess! Those were by far the most intense moments of my life. I had absolutely no idea he would come so fast with no midwives to boot! Sparrow gave me some shepherd’s purse tincture to prevent hemorrhage and then my darling little son and I just snuggled up skin-to-skin until the midwives got there, which was probably a half hour or so later. They were mighty surprised to walk in and see me with babe in arms!
The midwives helped me deliver the placenta, which I would have to say felt just as intense as giving birth, as I had a bit of a tear. Ouch! We then burnt the cord with a candle (Donna believed that burning the cord rather than cutting it retained the chi) and he became very pink. Donna checked him out, and he was little—6lbs 4oz—but perfect—well, except for a bit of a worry about his heart rate. It was a little low. We decided that it might be a good idea to go get him checked out at the hospital, so we bundled him up, but by the time we got there his heart rate had normalized and they sent us back home. Thank all the gods and goddesses!
We settled in at home, me in absolute awe of this beautiful little golden child (he was covered in blond peach fuzz and had this incredible golden hair) who had made his way rather fast into the world, blowing his parents’ hearts completely wide open. The amount of love that poured out of me for him was the most incredible feeling I had ever experienced!
I thank you, Cedar, so much, for teaching me such depth of love and compassion and selflessness and patience. Your birth was by far one of the most incredible experiences of my life that I will never forget in a million years. Thank you for choosing me as your mama. I love you so! Thank you also to both my midwives, for being nothing but positive and empowering influences toward the whole birthing process throughout my pregnancy. You were so encouraging and thanks to this I totally trusted in my body, was fearless, and had such an amazing birth experience. Thank you again!
KACHINA'S MAGICAL ISLAND BIRTH
One of my main visualizations during my second pregnancy was that the baby would stay cozy in my womb until at least thirty-seven weeks, so that the midwives could come to our little island and attend the birth. (Since the legalization of midwifery in BC, the protocol states that they cannot attend homebirths unless the client is at thirty-seven weeks’ gestation or more.) On the morning of the first day of week thirty-seven, I awoke to a trickle of fluid and sure enough my water bag had broken.
We were in between houses at the time and my partner Natty was just in the process of setting up the birthing space, which was a beautiful simple little cabin at the mouth of a bay. I wouldn’t be surprised if at one time whales came to birth their young there. It was the perfect place—protected and peaceful and so incredibly pretty.
I spent time preparing myself mentally and emotionally for the impending birth while Natty and my lovely friend and doula set up the bed downstairs (the bedroom was a loft and a little hard to access) and cleaned out the existing outdoor, wood-fired hot tub. It was to be filled with salt water where I had hoped to labor, if not birth.
I was feeling somewhat anxious because, as with my first baby, I did not go into labor until four days after my water broke. I prayed that by nightfall the sensations of my cervix opening would come. I carried on with my day and decided that if anything would get things moving, dancing probably would! I went to my improvisation dance class, trickling amniotic fluid on the wood floor. I danced and was blessed by my beautiful island friends. It was somewhat like an unplanned blessingway (the planned one was for the next day).
Sure enough, as I walked down the trail to my new home, I could feel the blessed relief of my cervix expanding. All was well! The cabin was clean and oh so incredibly cozy—the fire crackling and the sweet smell of sage filling the space. I set up the birthing altar, centered myself, and cuddled up with Natty—but with all the excitement, couldn’t sleep. The sensations were very irregular, so I took some castor oil and decided to go for a walk in the almost-full-moon-lit forest. What a night it was! Calm, clear, quiet, and bright. I felt so incredibly full.
I walked up the trail to my friend Laurie’s, where my son Cedar was staying nearby, said goodnight to him and brought Laurie back down to the cabin. The sensations were still very spread out so I spent a few more hours visualizing and praying and dancing while Natty and Laurie rested. I sang and chanted and the sensations got stronger and stronger. The castor oil started working its magic and the purgative effect came on strong (not so fun when you don’t have an indoor toilet!).
Natty and Laurie got up as things started to get more and more intense. Laurie stayed by my side and was such an incredibly grounding presence, helping me through the waves. I became totally oblivious to time and space and everything around me just disappeared and the only thing I was aware of was my body as it worked through the increasingly painful contractions. Toning seemed to help keep the pain somewhat manageable and between using my voice and Laurie’s strong, calm presence I was able to keep on top of it. Natty was in and out of the cabin as he filled the hot tub with buckets from the ocean. He came in and started playing the didgeridoo on my lower back as I was having really intense back labor (I didn’t know it at the time, but the baby was posterior). Then things really got moving. The contractions got really, really strong, with very little break in between and I was starting to lose my center. The pain was way more intense than with my first baby. The typical transition I can’t do this anymore came on, but this time I was more aware of what was happening. I had the urge to push, but knowing the midwives were on their way, I really wanted to wait until they got there. I had more control than the first time, and just breathed through a never-ending contraction, and then the midwives were finally there! Such a relief! I had a bit of a breakdown and started crying, and with the midwives’ support, pulled myself together and just surrendered to the pushing urges. Ouch!!!!! The burning!!! On my hands and knees, I gripped rather fiercely into Natty’s shoulders. In just a few pushes the baby was crowning and then, with another, the head (with the cord around her neck . . . thank the Goddess the midwives were there!), and then out she came as the first rays shone on the stillness of the morning of October 22. It was absolutely the most magical morning of my life! I had given birth to such an incredibly beautiful little girl!
She was born pink and peaceful and did not cry (we really didn’t hear her cry until about three weeks later, when unfortunately she got colic). She was a little gurgly in her chest, so the midwives suctioned her and then she was absolutely fine. We then just basked in the absolute awe and glory of this incredibly perfect, peaceful little creature. Wow, I now had a son and a daughter! What a blessing! So much emotion filled that little cabin (Natty was in tears), and ohh, the love and the incredible high that all had gone well and she was healthy, weighing in at 6lbs 3oz. I delivered the placenta, and we burnt the cord. We started on our breastfeeding journey (which was not so easy—even though I had already breastfed for two years, it really was like I had never done it before).
My son Cedar, who was four at the time, came down about a half hour after she was born, and said, “Aw, she’s cute,” and then just went out to play! Friends came down to meet the newest little island child and we spent the day celebrating and eating (my oh my was I hungry!). I really hadn’t considered doing this, but a friend cooked up the placenta with some onions and garlic and oh my god, it was absolutely delicious (I’m vegetarian and meat really doesn’t appeal to me, but this was incredible!). I just got higher and higher off the whole experience and felt so incredibly happy and grateful that I had been blessed again with a healthy baby and an incredible birth.
Thank you Kachina Sienna for filling my life to the brim with such an abundance of love! I am beyond blessed to have you in my life!
Lisa now lives in Courtenay, after birthing her son in the Kootenays and her daughter on a small west coast island (where the local residents now affectionately refer to the site ofbirth as Kachina Bay). Lisa operates her own spa and is a bodyworker.