All children, except one, grow up.
J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
Throughout his life, and what a life it was, Jackson never grew up. In his childhood he was prevented from doing so and then, when older, he chose not to. Beginning as a child star, he was alienated from a normal life and, therefore, throughout his later years, was perhaps seeking to reclaim the childhood that was stunted as a result of arrested development.
Jackson was a consummate professional in the recording studio, indisputably the greatest showman of all time and a visionary in the way he adapted to shifting musical tastes and the new world of video in the 1980s. But he was, essentially, the boy who never grew up. His Neverland ranch was populated with a zoo, a railway track, a funfair, and inside were collections of toys and of Peter Pan paraphernalia. Jackson even had a secret vault at Neverland. When the ranch was raided in November 2003, this secret vault was almost overlooked by the officers. At the back of a wardrobe was a door that opened into a narrow stairwell, which descended to a tiny windowless room – approximately 8 ft by 7 ft. There were shelves with toys stacked on them. The walls were lined with images of children, some in nappies, all smiling broadly. One of the images is of the face of the tragic child star and Peter Pan’s voice in the Disney animation, Bobby Driscoll.1 It was Michael’s private place. Whatever purpose it truly served, only he knew. There were three deadbolt locks on the inside of the door to ensure privacy. Very few had been in this special place with him. All those who alleged he abused them, without exception, didn’t even know of its existence.
As a man, Jackson had no idea of responsibility, particularly with his finances, and his relationship with children was never one with the classic paedophilic undertones of overt sexual interest in children. He was described as a classic paedophile in the Gavin Arvizo2 court case, a predator who groomed and then sexually abused boys. But if this was actually true, then where were these other boys he abused? Aside from Gavin Arvizo, whose accusations were entirely discredited, only four other alleged victims have come forward.3 None of these alleged victims have been able to provide irrefutable evidence that has resulted in a clear judgement being passed on Jackson. One of Jackson’s problems was by reaching financial agreements with any or all of his accusers it was perceived by the general public that he was guilty. Throughout his trials, there was never any conclusive, credible or direct evidence to confirm that Jackson abused any boys. He was deemed to have a pattern ‘of questionable and abnormal behaviour with boys’, but it is almost certain that Jackson’s sexuality – or in reality – lack of it, was simply a part of his arrested development and was uniquely combined with who he was and how dysfunctional his life had become. What was normal to Michael Jackson would have been incomprehensible to most people. In the end Jackson admitted he just enjoyed the company of children, he could relate to them and he felt secure with them, although, on occasion, his behaviour was likely entirely inappropriate.
It’s hardly surprising though that he had such an affinity with children when the other people who surrounded him were all adults who were, generally, unscrupulous ‘yes’ men, enablers, criminals and opportunists. From his father, Joe, to AEG Live and a catalogue of names in between, they guided Jackson only for their own benefit, and while Jackson made astronomical amounts of money, so did those around him. The authoritative figures that truly helped Michael Jackson forge his career were, in turn, rejected, most likely because they reminded him of the abusive authority of his father Joe. In turn he would be alone again, vulnerable, and so the cycle continued.
This pattern was part of his addiction, an addiction that was characterised by compulsive drug seeking and use, despite the knowledge of the harmful and inevitable consequences. A few who cared about him tried to help (over the last two decades there had been at least three failed attempts at intervention and stints in rehab for Jackson), but the majority fed his addiction. As enablers do.
Michael Jackson’s addiction to drugs most probably began in 1984 following his accident on the Pepsi commercial shoot, a venture he didn’t even want anything to do with and he was only there after much persuasion from his brothers. From then on, his desire for prescription medicine became, over the years, a chronic addiction so severe that he, an intelligent, gifted and rational person, would risk death on a regular basis.
Only an addict really knows what that means, truly knows what addiction is, and only their family and loved ones know how utterly destructive it can be. Perhaps, as soon as he took that first painkilling medicine in 1984, Jackson’s fate was inevitably sealed. And the progressive chronic disease that is addiction will only ever end in one of three ways if left untreated: jail, institution or death.
Jackson narrowly escaped jail. His status prevented him from being institutionalised, although at times his behaviour warranted it. There was always only going to be one outcome for Michael Jackson. In the end it was an early death. It was always destined to be.
Like Peter Pan, Michael Jackson was never going to grow old. He was one of the few true superstars that you could never imagine as an old man, playing with his grandchildren, counting shooting stars, sipping lemonade and laughing about who he used to be.
But for his loving audience, the legacy of Michael Jackson as one of the greatest entertainers to have ever lived will remain forever. After all, the dead are never dead to us, until we have forgotten them.
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Founded by a group of businessmen from San Francisco in 1906, the Great Mausoleum at the Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Glendale, California,4 is the final resting place of Michael Jackson. The founder of the cemetery was Dr Hubert Eaton who was an extremely close friend of none other than Walt Disney.5 Eaton firmly believed that life after death would be a joyous experience and that most cemeteries were simply grey and depressing monuments to death. He wanted to create something that was the complete opposite of this. He wanted to create a cemetery that was filled with towering trees, sweeping lawns and splashing fountains with beautiful memorial architecture instead of drab, stone monuments. What he created wasn’t so much a cemetery but a memorial park, art gallery, museum and architectural showcase, not to mention a Hollywood tourist attraction. Within the grounds there are more Hollywood superstars buried than in any other cemetery in the world.
For decades, Forest Lawn refused entrance to blacks, Jews and Chinese. Now, however, it welcomes everyone and attracts over 1 million visitors per year – as long as they pay.
However, not one of them has been allowed to visit Michael Jackson’s gravesite.
The singer’s grave lies somewhere in the massive marble and concrete building known as the Great Mausoleum, a building that is strictly off limits to visitors6 and one in which the precise location of Michael Jackson’s golden casket might remain a mystery forever.7
For the 30 days immediately after his funeral, security guarded the site 24 hours a day, seven days a week and, to this day, fans are only able to leave flowers outside the crypt while pressing their noses against the impenetrable double-paned and tinted glass window in an attempt to glimpse inside the building to try to spot Jackson’s grave.8
Michael Jackson was finally buried on 3 September 2009, 10 weeks to the day since his death. His family and 200 of their closest friends gathered to bid farewell to the King of Pop.
It was 90 minutes after the scheduled start of the service before the 26 cars carrying the Jackson family arrived at Forest Lawn Cemetery. His five brothers, each wearing one sequined glove, carried the singer’s casket, adorned with flowers, onto the outdoor stage where his three children placed a crown on top of their father’s coffin. After the opening prayer, Gladys Knight sang ‘His Eye Is On The Sparrow’ and then Clifton David sang ‘Never Can Say Goodbye’. Following this, out of the glare of the media spotlight, friends and family took to the lectern to spontaneously celebrate Michael’s life. When the service finished after one hour, his brothers carried Jackson’s casket into the Great Mausoleum where he was placed in his crypt at 9:43pm.
It seems deeply ironic that Michael Jackson, a man who craved and revelled in the adulation and adoration of his fans is now buried in relative obscurity, out of touch and out of sight of the fans for whom he cared so much.
It’s not known if the security surrounding Jackson’s final resting place at Forest Lawn will ever be lifted, but even if it is, one man who will never visit the grave is Conrad Murray. Despite being released from jail in 2013, a source told HollywoodLife.com that Murray would not be visiting the grave. ‘Out of respect for Katherine and the family, he will grieve, just like they are, but from a distance. He loved Michael – and he too can’t believe his dear friend is gone,’ the source said.9
Michael Jackson and Dr Conrad Murray had a relationship that was intense but brief. It ended with Jackson losing his life, and with Murray’s life being all but destroyed.
In a grim forewarning of what was to come, Michael Jackson supposedly once said to Conrad Murray, ‘You know, for the rest of your life and my life our names will become inseparable.’ When the doctor asked Jackson what he meant, the singer replied, ‘I am a clairvoyant.’
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Michael Joseph Jackson, singer, died on 25 June 2009. He is survived by his three children.