WHAT WAS SHE DOING?
Anna tried to quell the rising panic as Leo helped her into the dinghy and pushed off the jetty, rowing in sure, strong strokes towards his boat, moored just fifty yards away at the mouth of the island’s tiny natural harbour. She didn’t do spontaneous and she certainly didn’t do spontaneous with an insanely handsome man who seemed to have a hard time locating a shirt and convincing it to stay on his impressively toned body. Although, it was hard to be too irritated by the lack of shirt when rowing showcased just how effective said muscles were, obviously both use and ornament.
Looking up, Anna caught Leo’s eye and her cheeks burst into flame at his knowing look. She tore her gaze away and stared fixedly at the white crests of the small rippling waves, ignoring his snort of laughter.
It only took a few minutes to reach the side of La Reina Pirata, Leo throwing a rope to moor the dinghy alongside with practised ease. ‘After you,’ he said, gesturing at the narrow ladder on the side of the boat.
It wasn’t easy to be graceful scrambling up a ladder that was more footholds than treads. Of course Leo bounded up after her with a careless ease born of practice and a natural athleticism. ‘Welcome aboard.’
‘Thank you.’ But all she could do was gaze around, aware her mouth was hanging open in awe. ‘This is quite something.’
The deck was ridged teak, gleaming as if freshly oiled, and ran from the cockpit, through the glass enclosed galley and the open-air seating area to the open deck at the back of the boat. Inside the galley wide padded bench seats surrounded a dining table, a state-of-the-art television and sound system dominated the other side of the cabin, and next to that a small but perfectly formed kitchen. A hatch was open, steps leading down into the interior of the boat.
‘Drink?’ Leo strolled over to the full-sized fridge. ‘I have wine, beer, cava?’
‘Water please,’ Anna said hastily. The boat was already going to her head; the last thing she needed was alcohol discombobulating her further.
Leo handed her a glass filled with ice, fresh fruit garnishing the drink. Even the drinks were fancy on this boat. ‘I’m just going to stow the dinghy. Have a look around, make yourself at home.’
Leo kept the boat suitably shipshape, not an item out of place, everything gleaming as if it had been recently waxed or polished and yet there was nobody else on board. Not what she would have expected of a careless playboy at all. His toys might be of the very best quality, but at least he looked after them.
The almost clinical tidiness continued as she made her way down to the lower deck. She’d expected it to be dark and a little claustrophobic but the glass-sided walls were tinted so that although outsiders couldn’t see into the cabins, the sunlight flooded through. There were three rooms, a master suite with a perfectly made king-size bed, a second double bedroom and a study equipped with a desk and not one, but three computers, a satellite phone and a printer. ‘Curiouser and curiouser,’ she murmured as she scanned the room. Why on earth did Leo need so many computers?
The sound of the engines starting stopped her in her tracks. She was really doing this. Going for a trip with no planning, no foresight, nothing on her except the clothes she stood in—the dirty, paint-splattered clothes which, she was uneasily aware, made her the grubbiest thing on the boat.
She paused, fear thundering through her veins, the urge to yell out and tell Leo to stop almost overwhelming. Anna took a deep breath, and then another. Life as she knew it wasn’t working; nothing was how she had thought it would be. Order and sense weren’t bringing her the contentment they usually did. Taking one day—one afternoon—out to try a different path wasn’t going to hurt her. And that was all this was. One afternoon. Tomorrow she would get out her lists and be Dr Anna Gray once more.
* * *
As soon as Anna reappeared on deck Leo knew something about her was different. It wasn’t just that she had loosened her dark mane from its clasp, nor that she had removed her T-shirt to expose a remarkably pretty red bikini top. It was more the way her whole being seemed more relaxed, the pinched look wiped off her face, the habitual worry gone from her eyes. This was exactly what he had intended; he just hadn’t expected the transformation to be so quick. Or for every atom in his body to stand up and take notice. Easy, she’s just a girl in a bikini. You’ve seen many girls in skimpier bikinis than that.
But none that looked quite as sensational as Anna.
She wandered over to stand next to him, staring at the dashboard with wide eyes. ‘Can I do anything?’
‘Have you ever driven a boat? No? Come here, then. This is the steering wheel...’
‘I have worked that one out,’ she said drily.
‘And this is the throttle here, and here is the gear control. Okay...’ He continued to talk her through how to speed the boat up, how to slow down, brake and steer the powerful vessel, enjoying standing behind her, one arm loosely around her as he guided her hand on the throttle. The warmth of her burned into him, the subtle floral scent of her hair filling his senses. ‘That’s good,’ he said, swallowing, aware just what an effect her proximity was having on him. ‘Keep her going exactly like that.’
Stepping away was both an exquisite relief and an even more exquisite torture. He wanted to keep that arm around her, to touch the smooth skin on her back, exposed now to his gaze, only the thin red strings of her bikini contrasting with her olive skin. Her waist dipped in then flared out at the denim waistband of her shorts. Was she wearing matching bikini bottoms? No, he reminded himself. This afternoon might be about having fun, but it wasn’t about having that sort of fun.
Leo swallowed. He knew there were several good reasons why, right now, he was struggling to remember them. He took another step back.
‘This is great,’ Anna called out, her face intent as she steered the boat through the sea. ‘Where am I going?’
‘Wherever you want. We can’t get lost, not around here, and the tank’s full.’
‘Seriously? Just head off with no destination in mind?’
‘Anna, that’s half the fun.’ It almost physically hurt as he backed further away, her scent continuing to tease his senses. He could still feel the imprint of her body against his. Leo swallowed hard, curling his hands into fists to stop himself reaching back out to her. He didn’t remember ever wanting to touch someone quite so badly before.
‘Just keep going, yell if you get bored. I’m off for a siesta.’ He stepped back again and then again, turning to make his way out of the galley to the padded upper deck, aware of the puzzled, slightly hurt look Anna gave him as he retreated. Suddenly this trip didn’t seem like the best idea he’d ever had. In fact it felt downright foolish, the two of them cooped up on a boat that usually felt so spacious, but right now seemed cramped, claustrophobic even, although he was breathing in the salt-tanged sea breeze, nothing overhead apart from blue sky and hot afternoon sun. What was going on?
Leo took a deep breath. Let’s be rational here. He was attracted to Anna, good old plain and simple lust. It just seemed odd because he was usually careful not to get close to people of substance, of intellect. Didn’t allow himself to forge ties that might have any durability. He didn’t know how to handle a woman who made him sit up and think, who made him want to challenge not just who he allowed himself to be seen as, but who he truly was.
He grabbed a pair of sunglasses before lying down on the comfortable padded sun deck, folding his hands under his head and staring up at the sky. This ennui wasn’t new, but it was getting more and more pervasive. It had followed him around for the last few years, tainting every success, cheering the occasional failures. After twelve years his nomadic life seemed hollow, meaningless, making money no longer gave him the same thrill—but he knew no other way.
Somehow this last week, painstakingly painting and repairing, was the most satisfying week he could remember in a long time.
Leo shifted uncomfortably. The ennui might not be new, but it had certainly intensified ever since Valentina had announced her engagement. Like him she was very careful about what she revealed to the public gaze, like him she was all myth and mystery masquerading as reality. She didn’t create, she didn’t sing or act or dance, her fame solely concentrated in what she wore, where she was photographed and with whom, and she elevated what could be seen as vacuous existence to an art form. Not that he judged her, no, his little sister who had grown up knowing only poverty and deprivation deserved every moment of her success. But she had changed over the last year, both sharpened and softened by love. She was canny enough to use her wedding and her fiancé’s connections to promote her own career, to turn herself into a serious supermodel, push her brand upmarket, but she truly loved Todd. She had lowered her defences where he was concerned, had allowed him to see the sweet young woman behind the polished, posed exterior. What had that cost her?
He’d never know, because he would never make himself so vulnerable. What if he allowed someone in and they saw that he was exactly who he thought he might be: a sharp-minded, money-making machine with no real soul? All Leo knew was that he didn’t want to find out—and whether that was self-preservation or fear he had no idea. No idea at all.
He sat back up, impatient with the dark thoughts clouding what was supposed to be a carefree afternoon. He didn’t do introspection, remember? He did what he pleased. And right now what he wanted was to cool off, to slew the self-doubt right off.
Anna had kept the boat going in a fairly straight trajectory, the coastline visible on the far horizon. Leo scanned it. There. Perfect. Jumping to his feet, he sauntered back to the cockpit, careful to keep his face as insouciant as possible, to ensure none of his indecision was written anywhere on his body. ‘How’s it going?’
‘Good, as long as I don’t need to change direction or speed and nothing gets in my way.’ Anna turned and smiled and Leo’s heart stuttered to a stop for one long moment as he drank her in, the tousled waves falling over her shoulders, the bikini revealing more than it concealed and the new, relaxed glint in her eye, the natural smile, the confidence in the way she stood. Funny, he had spent the last few moments questioning who and what he was, whereas Anna seemed to have slewed off her uptight and organised persona with the casting off of the boat.
He stood a good foot away, not sure he wanted to be within touching—or smelling—distance of Anna, not until he felt a lot more like himself. ‘Fancy a swim?’
‘Here?’
‘Close. There’s a bay just ahead. We can anchor at the mouth to it and swim off the boat.’
‘Won’t the water be cold?’ she said, screwing her face up doubtfully. ‘It’s still early in the season.’
‘We’ll find out when we get in. Where’s your sense of adventure, Dr Gray?’ he added and saw the doubt clear off her face as if it had never been.
‘If I get frostbite I’m suing you,’ she said. ‘Okay, Captain, guide me in.’
Leo took a deep breath. It would be all too easy to walk over and help her steer into the harbour, to lean against her, to put his hands against hers, to feel the suppleness of her waist, to inhale her scent, but that kind of thinking was why he needed this cold swim in the first place. It was all his own fault. He’d wanted to see Dr Gray unbuttoned—he just wasn’t expecting her bikini top to show off quite so many enticing curves when she did so.
‘Okay.’ He leaned against the window, arms firmly folded, not allowing himself to step within touching distance. ‘You need to relax your grip on the throttle and turn the wheel like that, yes, that’s good, a little gentler. Keep her on that course...’
It didn’t take long for Anna to steer the boat into the mouth of the cove. It was deserted, the turquoise sea lapping against the volcanic rocky shore, the cliffs rising up ensuring that the only people to enter the cove would be doing so via the sea. ‘What a gorgeous spot.’ Anna stood, staring out at the view, spellbound.
‘I’m going to anchor the boat. It’s calm today, but we still don’t want it to drift off and leave us marooned here.’ Although there would be worse people to be marooned on a desert island with. She would be bound to come up with a plan for food, shelter and rescue within twenty minutes of a shipwreck.
Anna followed him out onto the deck and watched as he unwound the sea anchor, casting it out, calculating just how much chain it needed this close to shore. ‘Do you live on this boat all the time?’ she asked as he straightened.
‘Not continuously. I have an apartment in Barcelona, but I do spend most of my time on here.’
‘Doesn’t it get scary? Alone at sea at night?’
‘I’m not often alone,’ he said deliberately and watched her cheeks flush. Leo didn’t want to analyse just why he was pushing his playboy credentials so hard when the truth was he hadn’t actually slept with a woman in over a year. ‘Nor do I moor out at sea. It can be dangerous, even with warning lights on. I’m usually in a harbour somewhere.’
‘It doesn’t get claustrophobic? Living in such a small place?’
‘She’s bigger than an average studio apartment in London or New York. Besides, who can get claustrophobic with the sky overhead, the sea all around and the knowledge that as soon as the scenery palls I can pull anchor and go wherever I wish? Cannes, Monte Carlo, Ibiza...’
‘Anywhere as long as it has a coastline,’ Anna pointed out.
‘Anywhere I want to go does have a coastline.’ Leo peered over the side of the boat, one hand on the anchor cable checking for stability. ‘This looks fine. Okay, Dr Gray, let’s see just how spontaneous you can be.’ He flashed a smile at her as he shucked off his shorts, turned and jumped off the boat, gasping as he dived cleanly into the sharp cold.
* * *
Anna stood by the rail, laughing as Leo surfaced spluttering. ‘Is the temperature good for you?’ she called.
‘It’s perfect, come in and try it,’ he called back, flipping on his front to shoot through the water with bold strong strokes. Anna couldn’t stop her gaze lingering on his dark, muscled limbs, on his clean lines, the moment he had stood in front of her bare except for his swim shorts emblazoned clearly on her mind. He looked good for someone who apparently spent his life at parties, and it wasn’t as if there were a gym on-board.
Strange he actually lived on a boat, even a boat as luxurious and spacious as this. It didn’t look like a home; there were no photographs, no knick-knacks, nothing to personalise it at all.
Leaning over the rail, Anna looked down at the dazzling blue sea, aware how deceptive its welcoming was. Even paddling was cold; here in deeper water the temperature would be decidedly chilly. Still, she was supposed to be spontaneous, wasn’t she? Remembering that she was on holiday as well as working. Rosa would already be in the water, swimming after Leo, flirtatiously instigating a water fight. In fact, she probably would just jump straight in either with her clothes on or with no clothes at all. At least Anna was wearing a bikini...
It would be spontaneous if she weren’t...
A smile curved her mouth as she pictured the shock on Leo’s face, the way his brown eyes would darken to black. She’d been so aware of him as he had showed her how to drive the boat, so very close she could have leaned back just a little and pressed against him. He’d been aware of her too, she knew it. If she dived in next to him, in her bikini or out of it, would that awareness be sharpened, heightened? Probably.
Did she want that? Could she handle it?
Anna shivered, her skin goosebumping despite the heat in the late spring air. What was she doing? Leo was flirty, sure, but he probably flirted more with Sancia, with Maria the maid, than he did with Anna. They had barely spoken over the last week.
Barely spoken maybe, but she had been aware of his every move, every look. And she knew he had been equally aware of her.
She should stop thinking and start doing. Have some fun for the first time in a long, long time.
And with that thought memories hit. Another swim, another man. An outdoor swimming pool, a glass of champagne or two. Memories of clothes discarded recklessly, of the way she had dived in, turning to smile provocatively, knowing he would follow. Knowing, wanting, welcoming what would happen next.
Only she hadn’t been in any way prepared for what happened next. It turned out that spontaneity had consequences, that a playboy couldn’t be reformed.
Almost without intending to Anna folded her arms around herself, as if she could cocoon the hurt, the memories safely inside, almost shaking with grief, with embarrassment for the naïve girl she had once been. Her hand slipped down to her stomach, pressing hard against the flatness as if she could keep all the hurt, the memories contained within. But she would never forget the scorn in Sebastian’s eyes the moment before he turned and walked away from her.
Anna swallowed, her throat thick with tears. Spontaneity wasn’t for her, she knew that all too well, and playboys who lived on boats were definitely not for her. Let Leo have his swim. Then she would demand he turn the boat around and take her back to La Isla Marina, back to safety and sense. Where she belonged.