I can’t believe it. Somebody came. I heard the woman call out and ring the bell, and I swear my heart stopped beating for a second. I strain to hear more but the knocking stops and then I hear the drag of metal as the side gate opens and I run to the window, crouching down so I can see over the windowsill.
As I watch in disbelief, the woman who lives opposite wanders into the garden and calls out. “Is there anybody at home?”
Trying not to look, I can’t help myself as she moves underneath my window and calls out again. “I’m just retrieving my ball, sorry.”
The football is lying against the back fence and I wonder when it was kicked over. The boys haven’t been out all day, I should know because as soon as I hear their voices, I watch them with a hunger I never knew I had. Normal life. A normal family and they don’t even know how lucky they are.
I see one of them watching me through his bedroom window at night. It feels as if he is, although I know he can’t possibly see me through the darkness. I love watching him though. It’s as if I have company and I crave the sight of him.
When I see them playing, I watch every second. I laugh when they laugh and will them on when they compete against each other. I love those boys because they remind me that life goes on. For some, anyway.
As she moves around the garden, I wonder what would happen if she looked up and saw me. Should I try, at least? Call out through the crack in the window where only my hand will fit. At night I allow myself the luxury of feeling the fresh air and pushing my lips to the opening and breathing in hard. Freedom. So near and yet so far, because even if I escaped, I would never be free. They would find me and punish me, that much is obvious. Will I ever be free again? There’s a part of me that’s resigned to the fact I probably won’t. I don’t think I ever have because it feels as if I’ve been running all my life.
I hold my breath until she leaves the way she came and feel the disappointment crashing through me as I realise what a missed opportunity feels like. I need to think about this situation I’m in and quickly because it’s obvious my time is running out. Next time Mr Evans looks my way, I may not be so lucky, so I need to devise a plan, an escape plan and one that won’t fail. But my dad - what about him? If I run, he’ll be in danger. If I stay, he’s safe for the moment at least.
As soon as the woman leaves, I sit back on the bed and stare at the wall. Next time someone comes, I must be brave and try to get their attention. Whatever happens, I need to escape and get help. I must think about this because I’m not about to just wait here and accept my fate when it arrives.
It’s time to fight back.
* * *
As the night falls, so do I into a deep sleep and so I’m surprised to feel a rough hand shaking me and a harsh voice growl, “Wake up.”
Instantly, my eyes open and I see Mr Evans staring at me with displeasure and my heart freezes. He’s back. This isn’t good.
Quickly, I sit up and he grabs my hands and before I know what’s happening, snaps handcuffs around my wrists and says angrily, “I told you to stay away from the window.”
“But…”
“But what? Did somebody come around here today, or not?”
My eyes are wide and terrified, and I shake my head. “She didn’t see me, I stayed hidden.”
“She must have done to throw that ball over the fence and come snooping.”
Suddenly, he raises his hand and slaps me hard across the face and I taste blood on my tongue as he snarls, “That’s for dragging unwanted attention onto us. You didn’t know I have cameras hidden everywhere, did you? I told you not to mess with me.”
He slaps me again on the other cheek just as hard and growls, “And that’s for lying to me.”
The tears stream down my throbbing face and I stutter, “I haven’t, I’ve done what you told me to.”
He shakes me hard and squeezes my arms, saying tightly, “Don’t answer back. I’ve had it with you, your father, and this whole fucking situation. You’re just lucky I’m a patient man because if I had my way, you would have been shipped out and put to work a long time ago. But no, they had to go against my wishes and pussy foot around your fucking father. Well, time’s running out sweetheart because daddy’s not playing anymore.”
“What do you mean?” I feel so afraid, what if something’s happened to my father, he could be hurt, or worse, dead?
Mr Evans throws me roughly against the headboard and my head hits the wall as he snarls, “Your father only had one job to do to keep you safe. Well, that’s a laugh because you were never safe. He just needed to think you were. Now he’s blown it and we’re left dealing with a shitstorm.”
My heart beats so fast I almost can’t breathe and say fearfully, “Is he hurt, please you have to tell me?”
I feel the blow to my stomach before I register it’s coming, and his hand slams against my mouth as I howl in pain. My cries are muffled by his hand and he says darkly, “Word of warning, don’t piss me off like your father has, you won’t like what that involves. Now shut the fuck up and think about your situation because when I come back your life will change forever.”
He stands and then with a wicked smile leans towards me and whispers, “We’ll have some fun next time. Well, one of us will at least. You may not find it quite so satisfying.”
He storms towards the door and slams it shut, locking me inside as always but this time, I’m left with my hands cuffed together and a huge pain in my face and stomach but they are nothing to the fear that creeps across me like an unwanted virus.
I don’t have long.
I must make my move.