Idolatry

My Baal, shimmering Apollo, junkyard Buonarroti,

                funkadelic malocchio, voice shouting

from the radio, talking about love, about heartbreak,

                about doing everything you can till you can't do

no more. Then you float by in a Coupe de Ville,

                hair conked, wearing the mink stole

of delicious indifference, reciting the odes

                of Mr. John Keats like you was his best friend.

I was minding my own business, being good as a girl

                can be when every inch of skin aches

for the sky. Where is my wide sky, now all I see

                is you? Where is my ocean, you hex on thought,

golden calf in the living room of ambition, pagan call,

                demon whispering like beetles on the skin

of morning. I hear your voice come out of the mouths

                of little girls jumping rope on Orange Avenue.

I hear your aria in the shopping center pharmacy,

                in the tired lines around the eyes

of every sleepless night. You're an astronomer,

                roaming the heavens, a flyboy anatomist,

dissecting the stars. Tell me again about the stars,

                those cheap flashcards of the gods. Tell me

about human sacrifice, the huju rituals of versification,

                the quantum mechanics of line, my holy-of-holies,

sanctum sanctorum, my hideaway in the world of cool.

                Pagan huckster, heat up your spells, your charms,

your rapture, I come to you a novice, an acolyte,

                a scullery maid in the choir of the unruly. Give me

my music, my words, my lyrical demonstration

                of all that is gorgeous and invisible. I am

your handmaiden, your courtesan, your ten-cents-a-dance

                barroom floozie. My Lord-who-whispers-his-secrets-

into-the-skulls-of-angels, your slightest whim is my delight.

                Every day I wake to your disciples’ quick trill.

I am the prisoner of your darkest sigh, queen of ungovernable

                birds. You visit me at night when the sky is a veil

of stars, but your shame is an aphrodisiac, a love potion,

                a quick fix in the alley from the dark drug of words.