The next day Jennie got word from Aggie that Mr. Holder’s secretary wanted to know if she was available to come in for a meeting at Starlight’s corporate headquarters the following afternoon. She said yes even though she had three appointments booked that day. She didn’t care—either Irene would cover for her or she would cancel them; that was how important the meeting was.
Then there was the matter of figuring out what to wear. Aggie had made some comments about the dress she’d worn during her initial meeting with Mr. Holder. She told him it was her Sunday best and he told her that was exactly what it looked like. He said she needed to invest in some proper business attire, that when she went to that office it was important that she looked like she understood where she was and what she was doing there. He’d agreed to go with her down to South Parkway so he could help her pick out a new dress from one of the shops there.
When she went downstairs, Tony was sitting on her bottom step, waiting for her.
“I came to apologize for yesterday. Hope you know I didn’t mean what I said. This is a fine shop, Jennie. I’m proud of what you’ve done, proud I had something to do with it.”
“Oh, you didn’t do that much. Just signed your name on a piece of paper is all, remember? And I paid you to do that.” She shook her head. “That’s something, isn’t it? Here I am, just some poor, pitiful unwed mother. Yet I’m the one who has been paying you for the past seven years.”
“Oh. You heard that, did you?” Tony frowned. “I didn’t mean it, Jennie. I was nervous is all. Roderick seemed to be taking a little too much interest in your shop and I was trying to change the subject. It came out wrong.”
“Who was that man?”
“Just someone I’ve got some business with. It’s got nothing to do with you. I’d like to keep it that way, if you don’t mind.”
“Why would I mind? We’re not married anymore. Never really were, like you said. I don’t need to know anything about your business. I don’t even need to know who that woman was who answered your door.”
“Who? Mary Jane? She’s an ally.”
“Ally? What does that mean? Never mind. It doesn’t matter. The point is it’s not my concern. Soon as they process that paperwork we won’t have any claim on each other anymore. I don’t really know you at all. And I don’t need to.”
“That’s true. Because if you did know me, you’d know that I’d never look down on anyone for doing whatever they had to, to take care of their child. That’s why Mamie told me those things about you, by the way. She wasn’t trying to make me feel sorry for you so much as remind me that even if a courthouse marriage wasn’t real for me it was very real for you. She was trying to make me think about my mother.”
“Your mother?”
“That’s right. A very resourceful woman, much like yourself. When my father died she took over his business, turned it into something even better than it had been before. Then she made the mistake of marrying the wrong man. That man took everything from us. Used to beat on her whenever she tried to complain. So that’s what I grew up looking at. And I know a lot of people probably got the strength to rise above something like that, but honestly, Jennie? I wasn’t one of them.”
He looked out at the street at all the people hustling up and down the block as they made their way to work, then looked back at Jennie.
He smiled. “Everybody’s got a past, Jennie Williams. If you knew anything about mine, what I was like before I found Harper, you’d understand that I would never judge you for yours.”
He tipped his hat.
Jennie watched him walk down the block. By the time he turned the corner she could feel herself getting upset again. She understood the confession as part of his apology but she didn’t know what to make of the fact that he was confessing it now. It was the first time he’d ever said anything about his life before he joined Harper’s Army and, if true, it was the most personal thing he’d ever told her about himself the entire time they had been married. Because of that, it didn’t actually soothe her anger. Instead it made her feel something that was the last thing she ever wanted to feel: confused.
She frowned as she pushed through the door to the shop and found Lala already inside.
“You alright?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
“I don’t know, Jennie. You looked a little upset. I thought maybe it had something to do with the shooting.”
“What shooting?”
“Didn’t you hear? There was a shooting last night,” Lala said. “Down by the waterfront, at one of Bosswell’s warehouses.”
“That’s nowhere near here, Lala.”
“Maybe not. But it means the trouble’s not over. Who knows where it might pop off next. Anything can happen when you got the Good Time Gang involved.”
“Good Time Gang?”
“They handle all the bootleg in the Magazine,” Lala said. “Turns out they’re the ones who shot up the pool hall.”
“I thought those people were wearing masks.”
“They were wearing masks, but someone saw their necks,” Lala said. “That’s how we know they were white. Come to find out Bosswell has been messing with the Good Time Gang, trying to muscle in on their territory.” She shook her head as she thought about it. “What I don’t understand is why he’d do that. I mean, you’d think Bosswell would know better. Everybody knows the leader of the Good Time Gang is cousins with the chief of police. From what I hear, half the force got some kind of connection to that gang; a lot of them were in it themselves. That’s why don’t nobody mess with them. Mess with them, you’re going to have the whole city government coming after you. Wait and see. It’s about to get real ugly around here.”
“Why? Because someone saw their necks?” Jennie frowned. “That’s so stupid, Lala. Jumping to conclusions like that. Getting all worked up over nothing. Why are you always talking about things you don’t know anything about? You don’t know what’s going on, don’t know that man’s business. You’re not no gangster. And none of that has anything to do with you or me.”
Then the door to the back room swung open. Irene walked out, laughing and smiling with a woman Jennie had never seen before. The woman was carrying a large parcel, and she and Irene were talking in low voices and leaning close to each other as they passed through the front of the shop. They walked right by Jennie, and then Irene stood by the door and waved as the woman walked back out onto the street.
“Who the hell was that?”
“Customer.”
“But we’re not open yet, Irene.”
“Yeah, I know. Came to buy some of your products. Said she wanted to avoid the rush.”
“The rush? What rush?” Jennie squinted. “Why you got people coming in and out of here when we’re not even open, Irene?”
“I don’t know, Jennie. I mean it’s kind of hard sometimes. We are running two different businesses and that means we got two different clienteles. I’m just trying to cope with it,” Irene said.
“Cope with it?”
Irene shook her head. “She’s just some church lady who wanted to buy some lactic acid for her diaphragm. It’s part of the reason I think we should start selling door-to-door.”
“Door-to-door?”
“That’s right. I know you’re all excited about the deal you got going but honestly? I don’t know why. It seems to me that if some white man wants to buy Mamie from you then it just confirms something you should have already known. That she is worth something. And that being the case, I don’t see why you want to get a bunch of men involved anyhow. Not when we can just hire more actual black women, start sending them out door-to-door. It’s more work, but then you’d keep the profits, not have to worry about some man trying to cheat you.”
“How is hiring more black women going to get Mamie in the stores?”
“There you go again, always talking about getting Mamie in the stores. What do you need to be in the stores for anyhow? Poro is not in the stores. Madam Walker is not in the stores. That’s not the only way to sell something and you know it.”
“I want Mamie in those stores, up on those shelves, where everybody can see her,” Jennie said. “What the heck do you think I’ve been trying to do all this time?”
“Oh, I know what you’ve been trying to do, Jennie. But it’s not the same as what you actually did do, now is it?” She shook her head. “Anyhow, as it stands now we got ladies coming in buying real personal items and maybe they don’t want people seeing them doing that. Also maybe some of them got some funny ideas about the people who come here and don’t want to be seen fraternizing.”
“Fraternizing? What are you talking about?” Jennie said. “Are you talking about my customers?”
“Not all your customers. Just some of them. The ones who got reputations. Maisy Day and a couple of the others. Don’t take it personal.”
Jennie bit her lip. “Next time, you tell that woman that if she wants to buy one of my products she can come get it during normal business hours.”
“I’m not going to do that, Jennie,” Irene said. “No. It’s stupid. If I’m here and somebody wants to buy something, be stupid not to sell it to them. You are taking it personal when you shouldn’t. It’s just money.”
“No, Irene. It’s just my money. This is my shop, remember? I make the rules around here. If you think they’re stupid you can go work somewhere else.”
“I didn’t say your rules were stupid,” Irene said. “I told you not to take it personal.”
“I’m the one in charge around here. Why is that so hard for you all to understand?”
She looked at Lala, still staring nervously at the streets outside.
“Come away from that window, girl. Stop worrying about stuff that’s got nothing to do with you. I’m not paying you to gossip. Ought to be glad I’m paying you at all.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means you’re supposed to be working.”
“I am working. I do work. You got a problem with how I do my job now?”
“No. I got a problem with the fact that you are five months pregnant. What do you think would happen to you if I turned you out of here, Lala? How would you support that child? You don’t have a man, you don’t have any money. Nobody else would hire you in that condition. Most people would have kicked you off the floor as soon as you started to show. Because it doesn’t look right. We both know it doesn’t look right.”
She turned back to Irene. “Isn’t that what you said, Irene? You got people coming in who don’t want to be seen in my shop because something doesn’t look right? Well, maybe it’s not my customers who are the problem. Maybe it’s the two of you.”
Lala was quiet. Her lip started quivering and Jennie could see the tears welling up in her eyes.
“From now on, anybody coming through that door is coming in during normal business hours. You hear me?”
“Yes, Jennie,” Irene said. “I hear you. Everybody hears you.”
“Good. Now I’ve got to go out and buy a dress so I have something decent to wear for my meeting with Starlight. Can you handle things until I get back?”
“Yes, Jennie. Whatever you say. You’re the boss.”
Jennie pushed through the door and went to meet Aggie at the streetcar stop. As she stomped down the crowded street, she knew she shouldn’t have been yelling like that. There was a reason for it, and everything she’d said was perfectly true, but seeing as how there wasn’t much she could do about it, she knew yelling only made things worse. And yet deep down she knew the thing that was making her want to yell didn’t have to do with them at all. It was Tony. Bringing up her past like that, acting like he knew her. The way he’d looked at her when he told her about his mother. Trying to confuse her mind.
When she got to the stop she told Aggie what she’d overheard Tony say about her to Roderick.
Aggie’s jaw dropped.
“Is he crazy? Who is he to be acting like he feels sorry for you? Why? Because he owns a stupid store that doesn’t sell anything but Harperite junk? You are an inventor and entrepreneur.”
The streetcar pulled up and they fell into a long line of people waiting to get inside.
“I’ll be honest with you,” Aggie said as they climbed aboard. “I never trusted those people. I see how you went ahead and married one and I understand why you did it. But still. Those Harperites, always shouting on the corner, telling everybody what they are doing wrong. All that stuff about this world not being my delusion. It’s not just stupid, it’s dangerous. I mean, what does that even mean? Real or not, I’ve got to live in it, don’t I? They do too, whether they like it or not.”
He shook his head as he paid his fare. “A lot of crazy people running around the south side these days,” Aggie said as they made their way to the rear of the car. “And I don’t just mean Harper’s Army. Bosswell’s people too, shooting each other like that. It’s madness and it’s about to get worse. You know that, right? Shooting up Bosswell’s Pool Hall? It means somebody wants him to know they aren’t afraid of him anymore, wants everybody to know they’re coming for him and aren’t going to stop until they get him. And once they do? That’s when it’s really going to get bad. Going to be nothing but gangsters running around, trying to prove who’s in charge. I’ve seen it before, when Bosswell first took over. He’s the one who’s been keeping people in line all these years.”
He looked out the window. “All such a waste of time. You can’t wish this world away and you can’t shoot your way out either. You just have to find the strength to rise above it. By being excellent. That’s how you cope with this world, Jennie. That’s how I got my position in Mr. Leclerc’s shop. And every day I make sure that everything I do is so fine that can’t nobody tell me I don’t belong there. Because I’ll know they’re lying. And deep down, they will know it too. That’s how I fight. And in the end, that’s all that counts. Trust me, Jennie. Quality is what endures. Excellence is what’s real.”
They rode the streetcar until they reached 57th, then got off and walked through the park, headed toward the section of South Parkway that had been taken over by a group of investors representing the city’s black elite. Despite the housing covenants that restricted the sale of property to black people they’d somehow managed to buy some property and carve out a few blocks of stately homes and a small commercial district where, in addition to housing several black-owned boutiques and restaurants, the most successful black professionals in the city now had offices to cater to their needs.
The two of them stepped out onto a wide boulevard and tried to blend in with the people who lived there. Every time Jennie came here she thought of the cakewalk, a dance she had once specialized in when she was still performing with Cutie Pie. It was a performance that required strength and control, but when you looked at it, all you saw was effortless grace. Similarly, Jennie knew this world was not for the tired and the slow. As calm and cool as the people around her looked, their community was bordered on three sides by hostile neighbors, many of whom resented their encroachment outside the tightly packed southeast corner of the city where most of the black people lived. Businesses were routinely vandalized and several homes were firebombed in an effort to keep them from trying to expand the border of the black belt, making this the well-manicured frontline of a turf war.
Aggie stopped walking when they came to a large two-story building with a “For Sale” sign out front.
“What do you think, Jennie? You like it? It’s where I want to put my shop.”
“You’re finally doing it? Opening your own place? Congratulations.” She looked at the building. “You got enough saved up for all this?”
“No. I’d have to find a partner. Thought maybe you might be interested.”
“Me?”
Aggie nodded. “I’ve been thinking about it for a while, but now that you are making this deal with Starlight, seems like a good time to bring it up. I know you realize it’s better for you. You probably know more about skin care than anyone in this city, learned all that trying to make Mamie. How much knowledge you think you have that you never get to use because your current clientele can’t afford to pay for it? But see, you not going to have that problem with the ladies who shop here.”
Jennie looked around her on the street. Proud, dignified women with long dresses and parasols, men in finely tailored suits and straw hats. It took grit to live there, making them not just a people of style and of grace, but a people of fierce determination.
They were also people with money, which made every single one of them a potential customer.
“I don’t know if I’m ready for all that, Aggie. I mean, even with Starlight it would mean taking out another loan. And I just got my divorce from Tony.”
“Forget about Tony. This time let me help you with that.”
“You?” She was surprised to hear him say it. She knew how cautious Aggie was with his money.
“Why not? I mean I know how good your creams are. Got no doubt in my mind it’d be a good investment.”
“Investment?”
“I just mean I trust you, Jennie.”
Jennie nodded and wondered if she trusted him.
“Just think about it, Jennie. There’d be more than enough room for both our shops in that building. And really, it’s where you belong.”
Then a cheery voice called out, “Why, Aggie Dawson. Is that you?”
Aggie stopped walking and without missing a beat, his serious expression changed to a bright, sunny smile. He whirled around and grinned at a woman in a large hat walking toward them with her arms outstretched.
“Why, Mrs. Nelson! What a delightful surprise running into you!”
“I thought that was you,” Mrs. Nelson said. She leaned toward him, pausing between words to kiss the air beside his cheeks. “I’ve been . . . meaning to . . . thank you for that gorgeous suit you made for my husband. He looks so handsome in it.”
“It was my pleasure. And I must say my work is always that much easier when I am dressing such a distinguished man.”
“Oh, Aggie.” She laughed. “Such a charmer. What brings you out today? Another delivery?”
“No. Today I’m enjoying a pleasant afternoon of shopping with a friend.” Aggie put his arm around Jennie. “This is Jennie Williams. Have you two met?”
“No. I don’t believe we have.”
“Our daughters went to the same school,” Jennie said.
Aggie smiled. “Jennie here is an inventor and entrepreneur. She owns her own beauty parlor on 37th and is also the creator of Mamie’s Brand Gold.”
“Mamie’s Brand Gold?”
“It’s a healing salve,” Jennie said. “Draws on all the latest scientific research on skin care.”
“Is that right? And how is it I have never heard of this product before?”
“You will soon enough. Jennie has just negotiated a distribution deal with Starlight Industries. Soon enough Mamie will be available not just in the city but in stores all over the country.”
“Really? Well, that is impressive.”
“Jennie is a very impressive woman,” Aggie said. “And this cream of hers is really top-notch. In fact, Jennie probably knows more about dealing with conditions of the skin and scalp than anyone else in the city.”
“Is that right? Well, that certainly is an endorsement coming from you, Aggie.”
“I wouldn’t say it if it wasn’t true. And now with all the exciting things going on, Jennie has been thinking about opening a shop right here on South Parkway.”
“Is that right?” Mrs. Nelson said. “Well, in that case you must meet some of the ladies from my club. As a matter of fact . . .” She reached into her purse and pulled out a small flyer. “It just so happens that we are cosponsoring the art exhibit this weekend. Perhaps you would like to attend?”
“She’d love to,” Aggie said.
Jennie looked at him and then nodded. “I’d love to.”
“Wonderful. And bring your daughter. I’m sure she’d enjoy it.”
“I’ll do that,” Jennie said.
“Splendid. Tickets are ten dollars apiece,” Mrs. Nelson said. “Aggie can give me your address and I’ll have them delivered to your shop.” She turned to Aggie. “You I will see next week.”
“Can’t wait,” Aggie said. He waved as he watched her walk down the block.
He shrugged. “She’s nice.”
“Ten dollars? I don’t have that kind of money to go to an art show, Aggie. Not yet anyhow.”
“You are going to realize that sometimes you have to spend money if you want to make more. Anyhow I meant that, she really is one of the nice ones. You impress her, she’s going to be telling all her friends how they have to make sure to go out and support your business. That’s how she is, likes to feel like she’s the one who discovered new talent. Besides, I bet it will be fun.”
After that they went to the boutique and Aggie helped her pick out what he considered appropriate business attire. The dress he insisted was perfect for her may very well have been—but it also wasn’t cheap. Aggie told her that, like the ticket for the art show, she should think of it as an investment. She was an actress, was she not? She knew very well that if she wanted people to take her seriously as a businesswoman she was going to have to make an effort to look the part.
Jennie paid for the dress. She realized as she did that she was spending money she didn’t yet have. She tried to take comfort in the fact that Mr. Holder had told her she would receive half the money as soon as she signed her contract. Even if she didn’t know what standard terms meant, she figured half of it should have been at least enough to afford a decent outfit.
* * *
It wasn’t until she got back to her shop and saw Lala and Irene busy working inside that she remembered how upset she’d been when she’d left. She was calm now and felt bad about it.
“Hey, Irene. Hey, Lala,” she said as she pushed through the door. “I’m sorry about this morning. Feel like I might have said some things I didn’t mean.”
“You told us you didn’t want us working here anymore,” Irene said.
“Did I? Well you know that’s a lie. I’m not crazy, Irene. I know how much you do around here. Couldn’t get along without you. And you, Lala . . . best believe I know how talented you are.”
Lala nodded. “That right? Sure you’re not embarrassed to have me working on your floor?”
“What? You mean on account of that sweet baby you’ve got coming? Pregnant or not you still get the job done. And really, that’s all that matters to me.” She frowned. “I didn’t mean it,” Jennie said. “I was upset is all. But it wasn’t really you I was mad at. It was Tony.”
“Tony?” Irene said. “What’s he got to do with anything? I thought you got your divorce.”
“I did. He managed to upset me while he was signing the papers.”
“I don’t know why you wasting time doing that anyhow,” Lala said. “You and some Harperite man sound like a perfect couple to me, as much as you like to stand around and judge people.”
“Girl, what do you know about being a Harperite?” said the woman sitting in Irene’s chair. “Excuse me for getting into your arguments. But it bothers me when I hear people acting confused about Harper’s message like that. Being a follower of Winston Harper isn’t about judging other people. It’s about self-respect.”
Lala nodded. “I’m sorry, ma’am. I didn’t realize you were one of Harper’s people.”
“Harper’s people? Me?” The woman laughed. “I mean I was for a couple years. Long time ago, back when I was still married to my second husband. I guess some of it stuck.”
“So you left the movement? Why?”
“Because I got Harper’s message,” she said. “Honestly? Things got real touchy with those people when it came to my divorce. My second husband hit me and when someone tried to tell me I needed to stand by him, find the strength to love him through his anger, I was out. I can’t stick with nothing or nobody fool enough to ask me to stand around and let some man beat on me. And really, I didn’t believe Harper wanted me to. I feel like the Doctrine is what gave me the strength to leave my husband, even if it meant leaving Harper’s Army too. Because it turned out that was what self-respect meant to me.”
She stood up and walked with Jennie to the counter to pay her bill. “Harperites are just people. Some good, some bad, some stupid. But at least they’re trying. And really, when you come right down to it, the Doctrine is just words. Can’t nobody tell you what they mean. You’ve got to figure that out for yourself.”
Then a bell rang. Jennie looked up from the register and, as she gave the former Harperite her change, saw Roderick walking through the front door with a smile on his face and an excited-looking woman in a tight dress clinging to his arm.
“Afternoon, Miss Jennie. Nice to see you again. Here with my sister. She was hoping to avail herself of some of your services.”
“Which services?”
“All of them, honey,” the woman said. “Hair, skin, makeup . . . He’s paying, so I want the works.”
“Well, that’s not how things work around here. You got to make an appointment.”
“Oh, Jennie, it’s alright,” Irene said. “I can do it.”
The woman sat down in Irene’s chair while Roderick looked around the shop and smiled.
“Nice place you got here. I mean, it’s small, like Tony said. But nice. Just the three of you?”
“Why?”
“Just curious.” He nodded toward the back. “What’s behind that door?”
“What’s behind that door is private,” Jennie said. “And actually, I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to wait outside. Your sister should be done in a couple hours. You can come back to pick her up then. But we got a strict policy about men hanging around inside.”
“Oh, you do, do you? Why? You got a problem with men, Jennie?”
“Honestly? Doesn’t come up that often. On account of this is a ladies’ beauty parlor.”
Roderick nodded. “Yes, well, that’s something I’d like to talk to you about. Been thinking you and me might be able to come to an agreement. I don’t know if Tony told you, but I work for Dewey Jenkins. Our business, you might have noticed, is undergoing some structural changes at the moment. Looking to invest in a couple new locations.”
“My shop is not for sale.”
“Oh, I don’t want to buy your shop. I want to rent out that back room, whatever space you got available behind that door. Temporary, just until all this trouble dies down. You can keep right on doing what you do out here while we set up in the back.”
“What?” Jennie shook her head. “No. Absolutely not. I don’t have any space for you. Not interested in nothing like that.”
“You sure? Maybe you should talk to your husband about that. Because I’m pretty sure the man I work for has already paid in advance.”
He turned to the woman he’d come in with. “I’ll be back in two hours,” he said and walked out the door.
“What’s he talking about?” Irene asked.
“He’s talking about numbers, honey,” the woman said. “He wants to take bets out of your back room.”
“Why would I let him do that?” Jennie asked.
The woman shrugged. “He works for Dewey. I imagine someone must have taken out a loan and not paid it back. That’s usually how these things happen.”
“I didn’t take out a loan with Dewey.”
“I imagine that’s why he said you should talk to your husband.”
Irene and Lala looked at Jennie. “You know anything about that?”
“No. I mean I saw Roderick with Tony yesterday when I went to get my divorce papers signed. But Tony didn’t say anything about a loan.”
She squinted at the woman.
“You’re serious? He wants to work out of a beauty parlor?”
It was one thing to let someone come in to take bets from time to time. But using her beauty parlor as a base of operations?
The woman shrugged. “It’s perfect, if you think about it. On account of no one would suspect it. Everybody getting real paranoid with all these shootings going on. All the old locations are already targets, so they trying to keep business going by finding new places to work until it gets sorted out.”
“What, so my shop can be a target?”
“No, now, come on. Roderick’s not like that. He’s not trying to make anybody a target. He’s not a gangster. Not like that anyhow. He’s a businessman.”
She smiled. “Anyhow, you might find it’s not so bad having some men around with all this confusion going on. He’s going to pay you rent, give you money on top of what your man already owes. Might be you’d find you like working for Roderick. I can tell you from experience that it’s not so bad. He likes keeping people who work for him happy. I mean, when he can.”
Jennie nodded. “He really your brother?”
“Of course not. Don’t be disgusting.”
“But he told you to say all that?”
“He sure did. And now that I’ve said it, I want the works.”
She leaned back in the chair and shut her eyes.
Jennie bit her lip.
“What’s going on, Jennie?” Irene asked her. “Did Tony take out a loan from Dewey without telling you? Would he do something like that?”
Jennie didn’t know how to answer. And so, for the second time in as many days, she found herself compelled to go see her husband.
When she got to his store, the sign the man had glued to the front window was still there but Tony had taken a smaller sign that read “NEW” and used it to cover up the man’s “UN.” Inside, the shop was empty except for Tony. He was reading a book as he sat behind the cash register. When he saw her walk through the door he smiled so brightly it startled her.
“Hello, Jennie. What a nice surprise. Does this mean you—”
“What’s this I’m hearing about you taking out a loan from Dewey Jenkins?”
Tony stopped smiling. “Who told you that?”
“What difference does it make who told me? It’s true, isn’t it?”
“It’s got nothing to do with you.”
“No? Because your friend Roderick was just in my shop. He seems to think he’s got some claim to it.”
“Roderick came to your shop? Oh, now, that shouldn’t have happened. Whatever he said, he didn’t mean it. Just talking. He’s not going to bother you. Trust me.”
“Why should I trust you?”
“Well, for one thing we’ve been married for seven years. And I have never tried to take advantage of that situation and never would. If nothing else I would hope that by now you would at least consider me an honest man.”
Jennie frowned. “I don’t know you, Tony Marcus. I don’t even know what you’re talking about.”
“I know you don’t. That’s my point.”
She shook her head. “The whole reason I married you was to keep from dealing with people like Dewey Jenkins.”
“I know that too.”
“Then why would you?”
Tony shrugged. “It seemed necessary at the time.”
“Necessary?”
Tony was quiet.
“Oh, so you expect me to trust you but you won’t even tell me why?”
Tony looked at her. “Honestly? I used it to make a donation to Harper’s legal defense fund.”
“You’re serious?”
She couldn’t help it. She started to laugh.
“See? That’s why I didn’t tell you, because I knew you wouldn’t understand. I was trying to send a message, wanted Harper to know that there are people out here who still believe in his work. You know it’s easy to believe when everybody else does. But a true ally is someone that still believes when others turn away. I wanted him to know that no matter what happens, the movement would live on. That I intend to always live my life being the kind of man Harper taught me to be. But that’s got nothing to do with you, Jennie. And that’s why I was acting like that yesterday, about the two of us being married. I was trying to keep you out of it, to protect you.”
“Protect me?”
It flashed through Jennie’s mind, what Cutie Pie had said about Theodore doing things that were supposed to be nice but just wound up making her wonder if he was simpleminded.
“How much was it?”
“Never mind that.”
“I asked you how much.”
“It doesn’t matter because Roderick is not going to bother you again.” He looked at her. “Trust me, Jennie. I promise I’ll take care of it.”
Jennie walked back to her shop. She wondered if Aggie was right, if it was dangerous to walk around acting as if the world weren’t real, as if the things that happened in it were someone else’s delusion. If that part of Harper’s philosophy hadn’t worried her before she married Tony it was because, in truth, that was the part that had always made the most sense to her. Deep down, Jennie was a firm believer in the impossible. If she hadn’t been she never would have made it to the city, to the life she was living now. She would still be in Alabama, possibly with Cutie Pie’s father but more likely in jail or dead.
When she got back to her apartment, Cutie Pie was sitting on the couch, crying.
“What’s wrong?”
“Promise you won’t be mad.”
“Why would I be mad?”
Cutie Pie shook her head. “I didn’t tell you the truth last night. Theodore and I didn’t just have an argument. We broke up.”
“What? Why?”
Cutie Pie looked down at the floor. “He asked me to marry him.”
“What?”
“He asked me to marry him,” Cutie Pie said. “It was when we were coming home that night, after that engagement party I told you about. He started talking about how grand it would be to have a fine wedding like his friend was planning. I said I didn’t think I was ready for all that. I said I wanted to graduate first, that I thought we were fine the way we were for now. But he took it as a rejection and said he didn’t want to see me anymore.”
“Really? He told you that?” Jennie was taken aback. “Because you told him you wanted to wait a few months?”
It was suspicious.
“There has to be more to it than that. Is there something you’re not telling me?”
“No. There’s not. I told you he was simpleminded sometimes. Always doing things that are supposed to make me happy and instead make me feel bad for not wanting them. Why is that?”
Jennie shook her head. The truth was she had no idea. It did seem odd to be sitting there crying because some rich son of a doctor wanted to marry you. She stared at her child, trying to understand.
“Maybe you just don’t love him.”
“No. I don’t and I’m sorry I don’t, because I know I probably should. I know it’s what you want.”
“Me? No. You misunderstand. I just want you to be happy.”
Jennie stared at her daughter. More than anything, she was just relieved that Cutie Pie hadn’t told her she was pregnant.
“Don’t cry, Cutie. It will be alright. Maybe Theodore is not the one for you,” Jennie said. “I mean anybody trying to force a girl to marry them before she is ready is probably not someone you want to be with anyhow. If he tries to force you into something now, who knows what he might try to force you to do later, when you’ve already signed your name and don’t have nothing to say about it.”
The more she thought about that, the angrier she got.
“Stop crying, alright? Never mind Theodore. We don’t need him. Plenty of boys out there. I mean look at you, about to get your degree from nursing school, about to have a fine job. That’s why we’re doing this, so you won’t ever need a man to take care of you. Whatever happens, you’ll be able to take care of yourself.”
She smiled.
“Anyhow I like you standing up for yourself. Like you taking yourself seriously. You got to take yourself serious or else no one else will. Got to know your own worth. Took me too long to figure that out, but you already know it. Not gonna just settle for things because you know what you deserve. That’s why you’re going to have all kinds of things in life. Things I never could give you.”
Cutie Pie wiped her eyes. “You gave me plenty, Mama.”
“I did the best I could. But you? You’re not going to have to do like I did. You’ve got that education, and that means you can make your own way, make your own choices.”
She reached for her daughter’s hand. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted for you, Cutie. A choice.”