OLDGUY: SUPERHERO

ON WATCH

Oldguy gets bored
watching Flipper reruns

on his set’s only channel
in his secret headquarters

above Nu-Day Loans.
He decides he’ll go out

to check for malfeasance.
But things on the street

seem pretty routine—
people hurrying past,

eyeing his costume
with a mix of pity

and trepidation, a gaggle
of teens sneering, “Up,

up, and am-scray, Grandpa!”—
till he spots an antique

Packard parked by a meter
that reads EXPIRED.

“Too late again,” he sighs,
thinking the sign applies

to the missing driver. “Done in
by some gang of truants?”

Crestfallen, he returns
to headquarters, where

“Flipper and the Puppy”
is kicking off another

24-hour marathon.
Oldguy can’t recall

whether that’s the one
where Flipper saves

the puppy from sharks
or the one where he rises,

T-Rex-on-steroids-size,
out of the sea to terrorize

a coastal town, making wiseass
beach punks run for Mama.