A roxy is a fabulous birdy. What is a fabulous birdy? An elephancy is not a fabulous birdy.
Fabulous is not big. Fabulous is not bigger. Fabulous is not biggest. Fabulous is bigger-than biggest.
Here is something else. You and I may ask the elephancy to perform a miracle. Any miracle will do. The elephancy looks very sad. The elephancy looks very sad because it must refuse. The elephancy must refuse because no elephancy can perform any miracle.
Now pay strict attention. You and I may not ask the roxy to perform a miracle. Only a roxyfeller may do that. When a roxyfeller asks a roxy, the roxy does not look very sad. The roxy does not look very sad because the roxy can perform any miracle which the roxyfeller asks it to perform. It is a fabulous bird.
Birdies lay eggs. Ordinary birdies lay ordinary eggs.
Roxies are fabulous birdies. Roxies lay eggs.
Roxy eggs are not ordinary eggs.
Look! Here is an egg.
Is the egg an ordinary egg?—I do not think so.—Why do you not think so?—I do not think so because I never saw an egg like the egg.—Do you think the egg may be an elephancy egg? I do not think the egg may be.—Why do you not think the egg may be?—I do not think the egg may be because I do not think that elephancies can lay eggs.—Well then, what do you think the egg may be?—A fabulous egg.
You are right: the egg is a fabulous egg.
Is the fabulous egg bigger-than-biggest?—The fabulous egg is bigger-than-biggest.—Is the bigger-than-biggest, fabulous egg miraculous?—It is miraculous.—How do you think the bigger-than-biggest, fabulous, miraculous egg came here?—I think that somebody must have laid that egg.—Who do you think must have laid it?—I do not think.—Why do you not think?—Because I know.—What do you know?—I know that roxy laid the fabulous egg.
Let us now look at roxy’s egg.
It is hollow inside, like a housey. It is made of two parts. Each part is hollow. Each part is a housey. Each housey is empty. The first hollow, empty housey is the bigger-than-biggest housey of representatives and the second hollow, empty housey is the sennet. The representatives are said to lend variety to the first housey. The second housey is said to be an intimate housey because it is bigger than an elephancy’s housey, which is bigger than anybody’s housey, which is bigger than your housey, which is bigger than my housey, which is not founded upon a roxy.
What is now going on in both parts of the fabulous roxy egg?—Something.—Something what?—Something miraculous.—Something just miraculous?—Something miraculous and fabulous.—Something just miraculous and fabulous?—Something miraculous and fabulous and bigger-than-biggest.—What is something miraculous and fabulous and bigger-than-biggest?—Art.—Do you think anybody makes Art?—O yes.—Who?—Artists.—Are the Artists who make roxy Art bigger-than-biggest Artists?—O yes, they are the bigger-than biggest Artists of all roxy time.—Why are the Artists who make roxy Art the bigger-than-biggest Artists of all roxy time?—Because they are K.O.—Why?—Because the acoustics are perfect.—What is an acoustic?—Damned if I know.—Why are the acoustics perfect?—Because roxyfeller asked roxy.—Do you know what the bigger-than-biggest Artists of all roxy time who make roxy Art and who are K.O. do?—O yes.—What?—Put us to sleep.—And what do we do?—Go to the powder room.—To the powder room?—Da da da.—What powder room?—Why, roxy’s powder room.—Where is roxy’s powder room?—O, everywhere is roxy’s powder room.
Now pay strict attention.
Look around you very, very, very, carefully and tell me: what is in roxy’s powder room?—I am.—Why are you in roxy’s powder room?—Because I am hiding from the miraculous and fabulous and bigger-than biggest Art of all roxy time.—And are you also hiding from roxy?—O yes.—Why?—Because I am roxy.—Who am I, then?—I guess you must be roxy, too.—You mean that we are both of us roxy?—We.
Here is something else.
What about the bigger-than-biggest Artists of all roxy time who make the bigger-than-biggest Art of all roxy time which is now going on in both fabulous parts of roxy’s fabulous egg?—O, they are all roxy.—What about the fabulous gadgets for making mountains out of molehills and what about the fabulous murals and urals and what about the goosegirl and the loose-girl and what about whathaveyou and what about everything?—O, that’s all roxy.—What about the roxyfeller?—O, the roxyfeller’s all roxy.—What about God?—O, He’s all roxy.—God?—Didn’t you know? He’s the roxy of ages.
Amen.
Hark! did you hear a simply frightful noise?—O yes.—Do you think the simply frightful noise may have been a social revolution?—I do not think.—Do you think the simply frightful noise might have been a pin dropping?—I do not think.—Do you think the simply frightful noise can have been a bigger-than-biggest variety star whispering to its bigger-than-biggest variety self a hundred thousand million billion variety light-years away?—I do not think.—Do you think the simply frightful noise could have been an intimate talking moving picture hero brushing his intimate moving talking picture teeth?—I do not think.—Speak, speak, thou fearful guest! what do you think the bigger-than-biggest, the intimater than intimatest, the absolutely fabulous and perfectly miraculous and most irrevocably immeasurable and inimitably illimitable and altogether quite inconceivably so to speak roxiest noise of all noises was?—I do not think.—Why do you not think?—Because I know.—What do you know?—I know it was Those Roxy-Bottom Blues.
From Americana, March 1933. Samuel “Roxy” Rothafel’s Radio City Music Hall opened on December 27, 1932, as a two-a-day vaudeville house; and closed one week later. When it reopened, movies and a stage show were featured in place of vaudeville.