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Twenty-Six

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“Archie, Archie,” Cecilia exclaimed with an enthusiasm that Archie had not heard her use in well, ever. He turned from the flower decoration he had been placing on the mantelpiece and watched how Cecilia took in the room.

She was wearing indoor shoes, but in her haste had not bothered changing out of the thick coat and shawl around her shoulders nor take off the brown woolen bonnet on her head. Her mouth was slightly open as she stood completely still and looked at the salon, where she had been convalescing. Where they had first become acquainted. He had decorated it with flowers from his mother’s hothouse, and a tray with tea and vanilla and cinnamon biscuits was on the table by the settee.

“Curtis told me to find you here,” Cecilia murmured in a small voice, her eyes still roaming the room. When her gaze turned to him, there was a frown on her face. “What is happening? Who are you going to meet?”

It felt as if his heart bobbed into his throat, pressing against his uvula, and making him instantly nauseous. Her first reaction was that he had done this for someone else. How great a cad did she expect him to be? To have a tryst with someone in his parents’ house right under the nose of his wife?

“This is for you.” He struggled to be amiable and charming even though it had been his default before. But his voice pitched with the hope that this was enough. That she did not need fancy chocolate and expensive jewelry as an apology, and Rosie was right in that she only needed his sincerity.

“For me?” Cecilia repeated disbelievingly; her gray eyes were large in her face.

Archie cursed himself. He had thought he had been attentive towards her but clearly, he had not been able to show her that she could trust him not to sleep with other women while they were married.

“Come inside and sit down.” He ushered her to the settee and closed the door behind her. He debated internally whether to lock it but was uncertain how she would perceive it. “Tea?” he asked as he sat down in the chair opposite the settee.

Cecilia nodded as she untied her bonnet and placed it on the settee beside her, then took off her shawl and coat as well.

“This is all...” she started tentatively and looked around the room. “Lovely,” she gulped.

“Thank you,” Archie said and handed her a cup of tea. He had spilled on the saucer and the splash of milk she had preferred had become more like a slosh, but she took it from him with something close to awe in her gaze.

His legs bounced at what he wanted to say to her, and he tried to contain himself while she took a small sip of it. Archie threw his own tea down, scolding the back of his throat. Then decided that he could not wait any longer.

“Cecilia,” he breathed and realized that he was sitting too far away from her. He moved to kneel in front of her on the floor. Which was probably fitting, he told himself. Cecilia’s eyes went round at his gesture. Archie reached into his pocket for the box there, then remembered the biscuits.

“There are biscuits too. With vanilla and cinnamon. Because that’s how you smell. I wanted Cook to add honey and raspberries as well, but she believed honey might be strange and she did not have any raspberries.” He handed her the tray of biscuits.

The frown was back on Cecilia’s face as she took a biscuit.

“I know my perfume smells of vanilla and cinnamon, but do I smell of honey and raspberries as well?” she asked as she examined the biscuit before taking a small bite.

“No, but your hair is like honey and your lips are like raspberries,” Archie plunged in. He was clearly making a fool of himself, and he might as well go on. But if it made Cecilia trust him again, forgive him, maybe, hopefully, possibly one day just feel half for him as he did for her, then it would have been worth it.

Cecilia closed her eyes and breathed his name in a resigned manner. Her hand with the half-eaten biscuit lay in her lap.

Archie said her name with all the hope and conviction he felt, which at least made her open her eyes again.

“I have thought so since we met the first time. Your hair is just like golden honey.” He gently stroked her hair, “And your lips are as sweet and pink as raspberries.”

He traced her lips with his index finger and heard her breath catch. The small sound was enough to make his loins tighten. It would be so easy to lean forward and kiss her. She might even let him. She might even let him do more than simply kiss her, but a simple seduction did not change anything between them. She would still not trust him afterward. He removed his finger from her lips and reached into his jacket pocket to find the small wooden box that his mother had given him.

“I have this for you as well,” he told her and held it out to her.

Cecilia gave him the half-eaten biscuit and Archie unceremoniously put it in his mouth. She stared at the box for a moment before opening it. Inside where a set with emerald earrings and a necklace.

“It was my grandmother’s,” Archie told her. “I will buy something for you when we return to London, but I wish to give you a gift as well. Not to buy your affection,” he added hastily, “But as a way to show you how much I appreciate you.”

Cecilia was still staring at the earrings and necklace.

“Allegedly my grandmother received the set from a Russian czar who was in love with her. It does not have the opulence that one associates with Russian jewelry though, does it? I find it quite elegant, and I thought it would suit you.” Blast it, he was babbling. But she was not saying anything, not even looking at him. He became more and more concerned as all he heard were the crackle of the fire and the wind outside.  

“Thank you, it is beautiful,” Cecilia finally told him and looked up. Her eyes were unreadable and her voice a bit distant.

“Cecilia,” he said and could not help but grip her free hand with both of his. “You do realize that I appreciate you, don’t you?”

Unexpectedly a tear rolled down Cecilia’s cheek and she quickly dried it away.

“I’m sorry,” she muttered in a hoarse voice.

“What is happening?” Archie asked gently.

Cecilia gulped and looked away and for a moment he thought that she was not going to answer. Then her spine straightened, and she met his gaze head-on. A determination there that he had rarely seen.

“I just... This is truly nice, and I appreciate the gesture. But when you do something like this, all I can think is: How many times has he done this for other women? And is this the only time he will do it for me? If not, then when will the last time be?”

Archie wanted to haul her into his arms, hoping that it might persuade her to believe what he was about to say. He clenched his hands into to fists by his side however since he sensed that Cecilia needed words and not physical touches at the moment.

“I haven’t desired another woman, since I’ve met you,” he told her honestly. Cecilia made a face that had him add: “And I know that we have not known each other for long – or been married for long either. But I hope that you will at least let it count for something. I... there is no way for me to flash forward in time and show you that I will never betray you. Never do this for another woman.”

They gulped audibly at the same time, which had Cecilia send him a small smile. Archie was certain that he was practically beaming because of her reaction.

“And I... I truly miss being with you.” Again she pulled a face. “Not just in bed, but obviously I miss that too, because... I mean, you were there, that was by far the best...” He had been about to say something crude but realized that it did not even begin to describe it. “I think,” he muttered and suddenly could not look at her, but nevertheless had to confess this. “I think that what we did could not even compare to what I have done with others. I know that the motions are the same and the same body parts were involved, but it was not. Not the same, not at all. I have never felt closer to anyone.” He had to stop speaking; he was becoming too emotional. He could not declare his love for her by talking about them sleeping together.

He caught a motion out of the corner of his eye and turned to look at Cecilia. She was wiping away another tear and sent him a watery smile.

“Well, I have nothing to compare it to,” she jested in a hoarse voice.

Archie sent her a relieved smile and took a deep breath to be able to plow on.

“I hate how matters have turned out between us. As I was trying to say, I miss you. Just being with you. Talking to you, sleeping next to you. And again, not just because you are within easy reach if I want to...” He stopped himself from going down that path again and luckily Cecilia grinned a little. “The first night we spent together, I thought I would never fall asleep: You make these noises when you sleep and kick and turn, but now I can’t fall asleep when it’s completely quiet and I’m not waking up with bruises on my shin.”

This had Cecilia laugh properly. She placed the jewelry box beside her on the settee as she hit his shoulder playfully.

“I’m not such a restless sleeper,” she said with mock offense in her voice.

“You are,” Archie told her and grinned, relieved because she had not ended his awful apology yet. “And I miss it, horribly. And I am sorry, that I did not tell you about Lavinia. I just... our marriage was so new, and I thought I was protecting it by keeping it a secret. Not destroying it.” He sighed. “I should have asked for your advice,” he relented.

Cecilia gave him a sly smile.

“Good, because I have found a solution. We will take the child in as a ward.”

Archie looked stunned at her, two constricting feelings fighting in his chest: one warm and large that she would do that for him, for his unborn child, and one prickling uncomfortable, that it was completely impossible.

“You... We cannot. The scandal,” he managed to squeeze out.

Her smile did not waver, only broadened as she told him of her disgraced aunt, that they would pay to pretend the child was hers.

Archie had been kneeling for so long that his knees hurt when he sat back on his haunches. He made a face that had Cecilia haul him onto the settee beside her. He stared at the floor in front of him. The delicate flower pattern in a mint green on the beige carpet with the crimson lining.

“You would do that for me?” he finally asked.

“I would do it for the child,” Cecilia muttered and seemed to be studying the carpet as well. “I cannot bear that neither you nor Lavinia seem to care about it. Someone needs to, and I know that I could do it.”

Archie looked stunned at her, and she met his gaze unwavering. He felt certain that she could and even more astonishing would.

“I probably could as well. In fact, I know that I would if the child lived with us. It would not be an intangible thing hidden away somewhere. It would be...”

“A child,” Cecilia finished softly for him.

“Exactly,” Archie murmured and gripped her hands. “Thank you, Cecilia. Thank you. I don’t believe many women would have done that. You are truly remarkable.”

Cecilia sat completely motionless next to him. As if waiting for what would happen now. Archie savored her beautiful countenance for a moment longer, before turning and looking away again. Her beautiful appearance was simply the wrapping for an even more beautiful and generous soul he had learned. He gulped at what he had to say next but also knew that it needed to be said. Then decided to simply get it out and hear her opinion of it. It would not change anything to wait another five or ten seconds. It would not change her feelings for him one way or the other.

“I... I think I might be in love with you,” he managed to say and turned to look at her. He had hoped that she would simply throw herself into his arms and declare that she loved him as well, but all she asked was:

“Why?”

“Why?” Archie asked disbelievingly. “Why?” he repeated. “I just do, is that not enough?”

He had expected Cecilia to answer immediately, but she was quiet for what felt like an eternity while he waited for her response. For some reason, it had not occurred to him that she would not tell him that she was in love with him as well. Since taking an interest in women, he had fought to keep them at bay, to ensure that they did not develop feelings for him that he could not reciprocate. And now he craved that this woman did. His wife! It was laughable.

“I think I need to know your reasons why,” Cecilia then muttered, a tone of reluctance in her voice as if she would rather not demand anything from him but had to at this moment.

“You are beautiful,” Archie stated without thinking.

“You love me because of my beauty?” she asked with a pained expression on her face.

Archie studied her features for a moment. Her beauty had been what initially drew him to her, but what had made him stay, the reason he kept coming back was her wit, her humor, and her devotion to others’ well-being and care. Heavens, she had just suggested that they adopt his illegitimate child. That she would be its mother. Not as a sacrifice, but because she genuinely wanted to give the child the best possible upbringing. He should probably tell her all of this. And he would at some point, but at this moment, he was only able to rasp:

“Well, I think you have the most beautiful soul that I have ever come across.”

Cecilia’s eyes watered at this, while she continued to look at him. Her bottom lip shook, and he saw her lips move several times without words coming out as if she wanted to speak but could not. Archie wanted to put his arms around her, but the urge to keep studying her face was stronger.

“You said you think you might be in love with me,” she was finally able to say. “I know that I am in love with you.”

Relief rushed through his body like a warm duvet being placed over him when he was cold. He could not hold back any longer but pressed her towards him. For a moment he was simply holding her, relishing in the feeling that she reciprocated his embrace. Then his lips tentatively found hers. He was delighted when her lips started moving beneath his and could not help but squeeze her tighter against him.

Apparently, Cecilia saw this as an encouragement to deepen the kiss because her mouth opened beneath his, inviting his tongue inside. Archie felt his blood heat even further as his tongue met hers. He knew he needed to be with her right this moment, as fast as it was possible. They would have time to savor each other later; now the important matter was for them to feel united, as one, if only for a few brief moments.

He had always thought that declarations of love were a solemn, very intellectual affair. For some reason, he had never anticipated that it would immediately be followed by the desire to possess the other person physically as well. If he had, he would have planned this conversation to take place in Cecilia’s bedroom, rather than an unlocked parlor where everyone could walk in at any moment.

Cecilia seemed to be feeling the same need as he since she was tugging on his cravat with frantic motions, that almost made it too tight around his neck. Archie hurriedly untied it himself to be certain that she would not strangle him in the process. He threw the cloth on the floor and then returned to her, unbuttoning her dress enough in the back to be able to lower the neckline over her breasts. They were still clad in her chemise and corset, but he pushed the cups of the corset down to knead them through only the thin, almost see-through material of her chemise.

Cecilia moaned softly as he squeezed both tight rosy peaks. The sound had him look at her face; she was flushed, her hair mussed, her lips swollen from their kiss. She was more beautiful than he had ever seen her. Her gray eyes were studying him intently while he was touching her.

“We should head upstairs,” Archie panted, even though he had no idea how he would make the journey there. He was already fully erect.

“No,” Cecilia gasped and moved closer. “I need you inside me. We can be quick, right?”

Archie gulped and nodded at the same time. His entire body seemed to tighten in response to her words. He lowered his head to one of her breasts, sucking on the sensitive nub. Cecilia gasped and her fingers combed through his hair as she held his head close to her bosom.

“Can we do it on the settee?” she breathed.

Archie could not help but lift his head and smile wickedly.

“Certainly, there are so many ways,” he told her before giving attention to her other nipple.

Cecilia’s back arched against him.

“How then?” she asked, as she was once again holding his head against her bosom.

“I suppose you could lie back on the settee or be on all fours although I would very much like to see your face,” he murmured against her breast. “I could kneel on the floor.” He remembered how much his knees had hurt before and hoped she did not choose that option. “Or you could straddle me...”

The last seemed to be the final prompt that she needed. She moved to sit with a knee on either side of his thighs and their mouths found each other again while their hands were busy adjusting her skirts.

Her dress slid slightly down her shoulders as Cecilia squirmed when he reached the lace of her drawers. It exposed even more creamy skin and Archie could not help but lean forward and kiss her shoulder. Cecilia’s head fell to the side, giving him access to kiss his way up her neck.

He untied her drawers and pulled them as far down her thighs as possible, before finding her core. Cecilia moaned softly when he found her slick folds. And they were indeed slick. His lower belly tightened further at just how much she wanted him.

“We should be slow,” he murmured against her temple because he felt the situation demanded it.

“We will be slow later,” Cecilia panted as he slid a finger inside her. Her large gray eyes found his and she gave him a small nod to continue. “We have all night, do we not?” There was a slightly vulnerable tone to her voice as she spoke, which had Archie lower his mouth to hers before he answered.

“We certainly do,” he mumbled against her lips.

He felt Cecilia rise, then she hurriedly stepped out of her drawers, before coming back to sit on top of him again. They helped each other with the buttons of his trousers and Archie hurriedly shoved both his pantaloons and unmentionables down his thighs to be ready for her. With a hand at the small of her back, he helped guide her to take him inside her.

Cecilia moaned, her eyes slipped closed, and she rested her head against his shoulders for a moment. All fears that Archie had had that they were going too fast evaporated, and he stared at her for a second, taking in her beauty. It seemed impossible that she was able to love him and yet she did.

She started moving her hips with unpracticed movements, and Archie placed his hands on her hips to help her find the right rhythm. Cecilia gasped breathily and Archie had to check himself not to groan.

“Did you miss this?” He could not help but tease her, even though he felt certain of the answer.

“Yes,” she panted against his neck. He thought that it was all that she was going to answer but then she said on a breathy note: “I thought we might never again... and I did not know how to go without it.”

Archie had no answer to that except that he helped her increase the speed. She had said that they would be slow later, and he intended to, but right now his only mission was to see the flush of a climax on her cheeks.

Cecilia was not the most vocal woman he had ever been with, but he had learned to interpret her little pants and moans. He was fairly certain that she was close but still had to ask.

“Yes, I am so...” she gasped, and then he felt her clench him tightly, both her arms, legs, and inner muscles. The feelings sent Archie over the edge as well and he tightened his hold on her just as she had.

They were clutching each other for a moment, panting and gasping, before he felt Cecilia’s chuckle against his neck.

“What?” he asked and could not hold back a smile himself, trying to pull back from her to look at her face, but her face kept following his shoulder as if she needed to hide for another moment. Archie let her.  

“I do not know. I am just happy, I suppose,” she finally murmured.

“Me too,” Archie told her and kissed her hair.

The sound of feet and voices in the hallway caught his attention.

“Rosie, obviously this is a private moment where they want to be alone,” came from the hallway outside. Gregory’s voice.

“But my maid said that Lady Archibald had not returned yet. We are just going to make certain that he is properly prepared. I for one do not trust Archie to arrange the flowers properly. And have you ever seen him pour tea?”

Archie could hear his brother’s frustrated sigh, but Gregory did not protest any longer.

“Good thing, that the door is locked,” Cecilia muttered against his neck.

Archie looked frantically at the door. They had to be right outside.

“It’s not,” he whispered, and Cecilia practically jumped from her lap. Despite her dress covering the most essential parts, they would not be able to hide what they had been doing.

He saw Cecilia reach for one of the lamps on the wall and the secret door swung open.

“Brilliant,” he murmured as he scooped up her drawers from the floor with one hand, while holding on to his pantaloons with the other, and followed her. He closed the door behind them just as he heard the door to the room open.

“Oh, they are not here.” Rosie sounded disappointed.

“No, but clearly they have been,” Gregory said.

Archie’s mind raced over what traces they might have left as his hands landed on Cecilia’s shoulders. The hidden corridor was completely dark, and he wanted to make certain that he did not accidentally knock her over.

“I suppose they have reconciled their differences then and retired,” Rosie stated, and Archie could hear the grin in her voice.

Cecilia squirmed a little in his grip, making him think that she might be uncomfortable. Archie leaned forward and pulled her into his arms, pressing his lips against her temple.

“I’m certain they will leave soon,” he whispered.

“Cecilia forgot her jewelry,” Gregory stated. He sounded as if he was chewing. Blast it, he was eating Cecilia’s biscuits! Archie’s suspicions were confirmed a moment later when Gregory continued: “Cinnamon and vanilla, not what I would have chosen but it actually works.”

Archie tightened his arms about Cecilia. She certainly worked. In fact, she was perfect. He was not sure how Cecilia interpreted his embrace, because her hand inched between them, and he felt her starting to stroke him through his still-open trousers.

“Here?” Archie hissed.

Cecilia made a small sound of confirmation.

“Again?” Archie groaned against her ear.

The same sound.

“Heavens, Cecilia,” he whispered.

He was only vaguely aware that Gregory and Rosie were still chatting on the other side of the wall. His wife wanted him again and he was more than ready for her already. He gently backed her up against the wall and lifted her. Cecilia’s legs came about his waist, and he frantically moved her skirts out of the way as he whispered:

“Do you need me to touch you?”

He could feel her shake her head.

“I just need you,” she breathed against his ear.

Archie held back a groan at her response as he once again slid into her.

“Wait, this is Archie’s cravat, is it not?” Rosie’s voice cut through the haze in his mind.

Archie stilled his motions, even though if Rosie and Gregory opened the secret door, it would hardly matter whether he was moving or not.

“Yes,” Gregory asked. “Perhaps, they have not retired as we suspected...”

“Where could they be then? Surely, they are not hiding in here...” Rosie asked in a voice as if she was going to inspect the room.

“Come along, Rosie, let’s leave them alone,” Gregory said.

“But where are they?” Rosie demanded.

“I’ll tell you if you follow me.”

Cecilia moved her hips against his and Archie was reminded of exactly what was happening between them. Satisfied that Gregory would not let Rosie burst into the hidden corridor, he started his motions between her thighs again.

“Who would have thought that such a wanton woman was hidden behind your proper exterior?” he moaned.

“I suppose you had an inkling,” Cecilia breathed. “When we get home...” She paused to gasp, but it was not her tone of voice that had him pound faster, but the fact that they were going home together. “When we get home, you have to give Mrs. Jenkins a day off...” She gasped.

“A day off?” Archie asked his tone of voice as strained as hers.

“To take me in the linen closet,” Cecilia panted.

The idea that she had fantasized about the two of them together there sent him over the edge. He did not even have time to make sure that Cecilia was with him as well. He felt her squeeze a hand in between them, rubbing herself a few times before she moaned softly, and he could feel her body clench and tighten with her climax.

“Heavens, you are perfect,” he mumbled against her sweaty temple.