MARK TWAIN

At the Farm

Summer of 1884—Jean nearly 4 yrs old.

She goes out to the barn with one of us every evening toward 6 o’clock, to look at the cows—which she adores—no weaker word can express her feeling for them. She sits rapt and contented while David milks the three, making a remark now and then—always about the cows. The time passes slow and drearily for her attendant, but not for her—she could stand a week of it. When the milking is finished and “Blanche,” “Jean” and “the cross cow” turned into the adjoining little cow-lot, we have to set Jean on a shed in that lot, and stay by her half an hour till Elisa the German nurse comes to take her to bed. The cows merely stand there, amongst the ordure, which is dry or sloppy according to the weather, and do nothing—yet the mere sight of them is all-sufficient for Jean; she requires nothing more. The other evening, after contemplating them a long time, as they stood in the muddy muck chewing the cud, she said with deep and reverent appreciation—

“Ain’t this a sweet little garden!”

*

Susie (aged 12) came to her mother a week or two ago with a weight on her conscience. But she found it hard to begin her confession, her crime was of such an unworthy sort. Finally, under encouragement, she got a start, and said—

“Well, mama, you know Jervis and Julia are always talking about uncle Charley as if he was just everything—as if nobody in the world was so great and remarkable as he is. I’m proud of papa, and I can’t bear it to have them always talking that way about uncle Charley: why it’s just as if he was papa’s equal. Well, this afternoon Jervis—what do you reckon he asked me? He asked me what Manuscript was. I told him, and then—well, mama, I couldn’t help it,—I said that if his papa was an author, he wouldn’t have to ask that question. I was ashamed, right away, but you know it was too late, mama.”

[However, she seemed to find some faint little grain of comfort in the fact, that deadly as the shot was, it had apparently gone through Jervis without his being aware that he had been hit.]

*

During an interchange of severe criticisms of the dog Flash’s manners and conduct, Susie said—

“Mama, if you loved that dog as you do your children, he would act right enough.”

[That is to say, she would train him, with a strict and affectionate hand. A very good compliment.]

*

Mother came up 4th of July night and took Jean’s room, and she was transferred to another. Next morning Jean blackguarded that new room to me, eloquently and without stint; but in aunt Sue’s presence not a word of criticism concerning it could be wrung from her by any trick or art. It was considered that she showed a fine and delicate feeling in the matter.

*

July 7, 1884. Yesterday evening our cows (after being inspected and worshiped by Jean from the shed for an hour,) wandered off down into the pasture, and left her bereft. I thought I was going to get back home, now, but that was an error. Jean knew of some more cows, in a field somewhere, and took my hand and led me thitherward. When we turned the corner and took the right-hand road, I saw that we should presently be out of range of call and sight; so I began to argue against continuing the expedition, and Jean began to argue in favor of it—she using English for light skirmishing, and German for “business.” I kept up my end with vigor, and demolished her arguments in detail, one after the other, till I judged I had her about cornered. She hesitated a moment, then answered up sharply:

“Wir werden kein mehr darüber sprechen!” [We won’t talk any more about it.]

It nearly took my breath away; though I thought I might possibly have misunderstood. I said:

“Why, you little rascal! Was hast du gesagt?”

But she said the same words over again, and in the same decided way. I suppose I ought to have been outraged; but I wasn’t, I was charmed. And I suppose I ought to have spanked her; but I didn’t, I fraternized with the enemy, and we went on and spent half an hour with the cows.

*

Mama was speaking of a servant who had been pretty unveracious, but was now “trying to tell the truth.” Susie was a good deal surprised, and said she shouldn’t think anybody would have to try to tell the truth.