part0061

It is true that in many countries the number of people traveling has increased over recent years. There are reasons which can be identified to account for this trend and travelers undoubtedly benefit from the chance to travel more frequently and to visit even the most far-flung destinations.

At least two important factors help to explain why an increasing number of people are now able to enjoy domestic and international travel. Firstly , growing prosperity and a rise in living standards in many countries have enabled people to enjoy things which they could never have before. With greater disposable income, family luxuries such as holidays have now become affordable. Secondly , competition among tour operators has reduced the cost of traveling. Only a few decades ago, for example , budget airlines did not exist, but now they are used by millions of passengers each year.

In my view , in the case of both domestic and international travel, there are clear advantages for travelers. People now have a wide choice of places to go and things to see and do. They are now able to experience other parts of their own countries or to enjoy the richness of unfamiliar and, sometimes, exotic destinations. Thailand, for instance , is immensely popular with tourists from all over the world, including Vietnam. Visitors enjoy not only the unique cuisine but also the rich historical heritage of Thai temples and traditions. Another advantage for many people, now that travel is less costly, is the chance to be reunited with family members who have moved abroad because of work, study or simply in search of a better life. Family ties can be maintained and strengthened thanks to the greater opportunities to travel.

In conclusion , there are clear reasons why more people are traveling and there are obvious advantages for travelers.

This is an excellent essay with a lot of strong points. It is a very interesting one. In paragraph 2, you suggested two very relevant reasons for this trend. You explained both of them fully and you supported your second point with an example. In paragraph 3, you focused exclusively on positive impacts. You argued both point convincingly and at length, again giving real-life examples to support your ideas. My score for task response is 9

The topic sentences were ideal. You identified your arguments perfectly in paragraph 2 and paragraph 3. As your sentences were also linked very smoothly, and for coherence/cohesion, my score is 9.

I think that one of the strong points is this essay is your awareness of words which combine together well (“collocations”): far-flung destinations, have a wide choice of places to go, to be immensely popular with, etc.