DAY 19
If someone walked up to you and said, “I want to be here now. Where’s it happening?” you’d be puzzled. “Now” isn’t a place on the map. Brain connections can be mapped in their precise locations, but there is no top, bottom, back, or front to awareness. The now is continuous because awareness is continuous. Only in virtual reality are limitations like beginnings and endings or birth and death imposed. When experienced directly, reality flows like a river. But you have to imagine it as a river that flows in a circle, without starting in the mountains and running to the sea.
When you are awake, even to describe awareness as a flow is too limiting. Awareness doesn’t need to be active. As it happens, activity is everywhere. Outside of meditation or unexpected moments of silence, the mind is constantly participating in the rise and fall of consciousness as it modifies itself. Beyond the constant buzz of activity, consciousness is silent, pure, unbounded, not needing to do anything. Upon waking up, you identify with pure consciousness, enjoying the calmness and security it brings.
Silent awareness is always with you, waiting to be noticed. Sit in a quiet place and say to yourself, “I am _______,” filling in the blank with your full name. With a brief pause between them, say the following things to yourself: “I am [first name],” then “I am,” then “Am,” and finally no thought. Without labels to identify with, the mind is quiet. As you experience this state, even for a moment, you have found your real identity. The ego emerges from mental activity; your true self emerges from silent awareness.