Just under a week later, Miles stood at the bar on the busy Saturday night waiting to be served. He’d been coming to The Chain and Anchor ever since he was old enough to drink. Younger actually. There might have been a few sneaky underage pints when he was at grammar school. It was a wonder he ever got served with all the acne he’d had. A cold shiver ran down his spine at the memory. The few friends he’d had didn’t tease him, but Jay Adams – captain of the local football team – had, and it had affected his self-confidence. In fact, it had destroyed it. Miles raised his hand and rubbed his chin. Most of the scars had faded but there were one or two he never failed to notice when he was shaving. The emotional scars had lasted far longer.
Jay had always made sure Miles felt small, colluding with his mates so Miles was the last one picked at football. He had never felt good enough. All he’d wanted back then was to be liked by the cool kids. Cool kids like Jay. A memory he’d kept pushed down made its way to the surface: a recollection of Jay asking him to join him and his mates on a night out. Miles, with his unworldly misplaced trust, had thought things were finally looking up, that they were seeing past all the things he couldn’t do and getting to know the real him. But of course he was wrong. When he’d met them that night they’d belittled him, called him repellent, told him he should wear a bag over his head, then wedgied him. He hadn’t gone back to football after that.
When years later he’d met Kiera and she’d been interested in him, he couldn’t have felt further from the teenage loser he’d been back then. Glancing at her now, he noticed her long soft hair was gently curling about her shoulders and she looked cute pouting as she redid her lipstick, but he couldn’t stop the niggling feeling that something wasn’t right anymore.
A rising doubt kept popping up even though he repeatedly pushed it down and did his best to ignore it. His brain wasn’t helping because if it wasn’t thinking about Kiera, it was thinking about Stella and when he did, an emotion he couldn’t quite identify niggled at the back of his mind. For some reason, an image of Stella kept appearing when he least expected it. And now, thanks to Jay, memories he didn’t want to think or feel again were resurfacing too.
‘What can I get ya, mate?’ asked the young barman.
Miles was taken by surprise by his bright blue hair and decided he was getting old. This guy didn’t look old enough to have left school let alone have a job. ‘I’ll have a pint of Shin Splints and a large Chardonnay, please.’ The barman nodded and began preparing their drinks. Miles reached in his back pocket for his wallet and as he turned, caught sight of Jay in the corner. Suddenly it was like he was fifteen again and he felt exactly the same way he had that night. Miles tried to shrug it off, reminding himself he was a grown, successful man now, and no longer a loser. But he still didn’t trust Jay even after all these years.
Kiera denied it, but Miles was sure Jay had made a play for her when they’d been working together on her website. The thought had flashed up again the other night at the restaurant when Jay had tapped on the window. He’d always enjoyed stealing Miles’s girlfriends on the very odd occasion he’d got one while his face was covered in spots. And there was still something sly about him Miles didn’t like. Jay’s voice, fuelled by the empty pint glasses in front of him, rose above the din.
‘So there we were, me doing my thing, sorting out her website and, well you know what happened next.’ He gave a self-satisfied laugh. His friends guffawed along with him. ‘I know a gentleman should never kiss and tell but, mate, let me tell you, she might have been out of practice, but she was more than willing to learn.’
Miles wrinkled his nose in disgust as the other men at the table jeered and laughed. The man was a pig, and so were his idiotic friends. All of them still like a bunch of horny teenagers. He felt sorry for whoever they were laughing at. Jay had always been too smooth and Miles had no idea how the women of Swallowtail Bay hadn’t figured him out by now. One of Jay’s friends, a guy Miles had known from football, stood and collected their pint glasses. ‘But she’s only been here a couple of months. That’s fast work, innit?’
Miles felt a prickle of tension grab the back of his neck. Stella had only been here a couple of months and Kiera had given her Jay’s card. Jay raised his annoyingly chiselled jaw and shrugged. ‘Honestly, mate, she was well up for it.’
‘All part of the service, hey?’ The man walked over and waited beside Miles at the bar. ‘All right, Miles? How ya doing?’
Not for the life of him could Miles remember the guy’s name. He’d have to bluff it out. ‘I’m all right, mate, cheers. You?’ The guy put down the glasses and shook Miles’s hand.
Another surge of laughter came from the corner and the man looked over and back to Miles. ‘You know Jay, don’t ya? He did your website, didn’t he?’
‘Not mine, but my fiancée’s.’
‘D’ya know, that man gets more sex than any other bloke I know. Who’d have thought being a website designer got you laid, hey?’ Miles gave a small nod, wishing the man would stop talking. ‘He’s just done the website for that bird who bought old Herbert’s shop and she jumped into bed with him the first chance she got! Women, hey?’
So he had been talking about Stella. Miles could feel his features tighten as he struggled to understand why he was so bothered by it. The guy must have seen something in the unspoken response as he said, ‘Oh, sorry, mate. You were after that shop, weren’t ya?’
Anger began to rise up in Miles’s body. Every fibre of muscle and sinew was on fire and the back of his neck grew hot. ‘I was interested for a while but it didn’t work out.’
The man grabbed his shoulder in a giant hand and squeezed. ‘That’s shit. Never mind though, mate. Plenty more fish in the sea and all that. Plenty more shops on the high street.’ He laughed at his own joke.
Miles gave him a polite smile but couldn’t get away quick enough. ‘My fiancée’s over there so I’d better get back to her. Nice to see you again.’ He picked up the drinks and stalked off to Kiera and their quiet seat in the corner. The pub was busy and he had to wind his way through the crowd. The fire in his stomach bubbled away and rose into his chest to set his lungs alight.
‘What’s wrong with you?’ asked Kiera in an amused voice. She took her drink from him and had a dainty sip. ‘You look cross. What did that man say?’
Miles took a big mouthful of his drink and tried to figure out exactly what was going through his brain. He was normally a clear-headed, logical thinker, but a great mishmash of emotions surged through him, fogging his mind. Why was he so angry? It wasn’t that he was attracted to Stella and jealous, but for some reason an image of her gathered in his mind’s eye. It was her face the moment they’d connected over the beautiful painting. Her deep brownish-red eyes, her light brown hair and her perfect peaches-and-cream skin.
Vivien had told him Stella’s story one day in the café and there’d been something about her bravery he approved of. The old girl had too. He took a sip of his drink. Jay Adams? He hadn’t thought Stella the type of woman to be so easily flattered and easily tempted. Lexi had said she was lonely but she seemed too cheerful for that. And how did everyone think what Jay was doing was okay? Sitting there telling the pub about his private life like love was some sort of competition. It beggared belief.
‘Miles,’ said Kiera, sharply. ‘For God’s sake, what’s the matter? You look like the whole world’s ending.’
He took another sip of his drink before saying, ‘Jay’s telling everyone about him and Stella sleeping together.’
‘So?’ A horrid smirk passed over Kiera’s face. A look he’d noticed more and more recently.
‘So he’s being really rude and crass about it. If they did sleep together he shouldn’t be going around telling everyone. It’s not very decent of him.’ Kiera flung her hair back over her shoulder and smiled. Something about that smile put Miles on edge. It wasn’t genuine; it was a weird, almost smug smile. ‘Why are you smiling?’ he asked. ‘You wouldn’t like it if he slept with you and then told the whole town. He shouldn’t be doing it.’
‘He didn’t really sleep with her,’ she replied, nonchalantly. ‘She said no, actually.’
‘What? How do you know that?’
‘We’re friends. He told me. He thought they were going to and just as he was making his move, she said no.’
Miles’s glass paused at his mouth. He felt the ale touch his lips then lowered it down. This news was worrying on so many different levels. Not only had he not realised Kiera and Jay were still so close, but why would Jay do something like that? Was his ego so fragile that he had to lie? And this could ruin Stella’s reputation. He hated gossip. ‘So why is he telling everyone that they did?’
‘Because I told him to.’
‘You did what?’ Miles hadn’t meant to raise his voice and the people at the tables near them turned and stared. He turned his glass in his fingers and studied it for a moment trying to calm the anger and confusion rising inside him. He couldn’t believe what he’d just heard.
Kiera sat back and toyed with her phone, saying it again slowly like it was all perfectly reasonable. ‘I told him to.’
‘Why would you do that?’ he whispered.
She put her phone down and looked up. ‘Don’t look at me in that judgemental way of yours, Miles.’
‘I think we should leave,’ he said. He had to get out and understand what was happening and he couldn’t do that with all the noise of the pub ringing in his ears.
‘But I’ve only just got my drink.’
‘I don’t want to talk about this here.’
‘Then change the subject.’ She looked up from under her eyelashes almost flirtatiously. ‘I’m not moving until I’ve had my drink.’ Though he was frustrated, he couldn’t pick her up and carry her outside. Miles gulped some of his pint, trying to figure out what to say next but changing the subject was impossible. ‘You don’t seem to realise, Miles,’ she continued after drinking some of her wine, ‘I’m trying to help you.’
‘How is that helping me? How is slandering someone and ruining their reputation helping me?’ How could Kiera think he’d want such a thing? She knew how much he hated gossip. More and more he felt like he didn’t know her anymore. And what was worse, she was turning into the type of person he didn’t want to know. Keeping his annoyance contained in just a whisper took a huge amount of control.
Kiera’s face, however, remained placid. ‘Because it hurt Jay’s feelings and we wanted to get back at her. She was being a tease. Plus I thought it might make her leave so you can get the shop.’ She sat back and sipped her wine like she was a saint who’d just performed their most benevolent miracle to date.
After Kiera’s mention of moving to London the other night, something didn’t sit right. Even when she was saying supportive things she always sounded somewhat reticent. Something was going on, but right now he couldn’t figure out what. ‘Make her leave?’
‘Yes.’
‘But it would ruin her life. What if people find out and think I put Jay up to it? Everyone knows how much I wanted the shop. My reputation will be ruined too.’
‘Well, then we just start again somewhere else. There are millions of shops and holiday lets available all over the place. Or we move to London.’ She adjusted the sleeve on her pretty top and suddenly the penny dropped.
This whole thing was a win-win for her. If the business failed and Stella sold up, Kiera knew he’d find it hard to take it over. He’d already told her that if the shop came up again he’d be too worried the town would think him a vulture. They’d been known to boycott stores for less. And if Stella didn’t sell up and leave, Kiera and Jay could leak it that Miles had made up the lie to try and ruin both his and Stella’s reputations. Kiera knew Miles’s reputation meant everything to him. If the town hated him they’d never step foot in any shop he owned and he’d have no choice but to move away. Maybe move to London with Kiera. ‘Is that why you did it?’ he asked quietly. ‘To get me to move to London?’
She tossed a curl over her shoulder and played innocent. ‘I don’t know what you mean. I told you, I did it for you. To help you get the shop you’ve always wanted. That’s what you’ve always said to me.’
‘I told you last week I was looking at new properties now. What you mean is you were going to pretend I was the one who let slip the gossip.’
‘I really don’t know what you’re talking about, Miles.’ Her brow wrinkled in fake confusion, her voice sweet and sickly with pretend innocence. He felt betrayed but when he looked at things from Stella’s perspective things were even worse.
‘What if Stella really is as lonely as Vivien said and she becomes depressed? How would you feel then? How would that sit with your conscience?’ Miles’s own conscience pricked as he recalled their interactions. He’d been offhand and rude when he first met her and her dog, still pained that he’d lost out on his dream. Kiera had then made things worse with her rudeness. A trait he realised now had always been there but he’d been blind to. Then when he’d tried to make amends he assumed he’d just stroll in and Stella would forget all about his ill manners. Even if some of his bad manners had been down to nerves, shame burned in his brain. He’d been such an arse. He’d been conceited and arrogant all because he felt Herbert had wronged him, when in fact Herbert could sell the shop to whomever he wanted and Miles had been ridiculous to think otherwise. Moreover the thought of Stella crying herself to sleep because her business was failing squeezed the life out of his heart.
‘My conscience would be fine because I did this for you, Miles,’ Kiera answered coolly but her words lacked conviction. ‘I did it for the man I love. Not that you seem very grateful.’
Slowly, Miles realised something terrible and painful. The woman in front of him was unrecognisable. Worst of all, she didn’t love him at all. Not really.
‘I’m not grateful,’ he replied, still struggling to keep his emotions contained within a whisper. His thighs tensed and he had to stop himself from rising out of his chair. ‘I think it’s a terrible thing you’ve done. You’re going to have to tell Jay to stop lying.’
Kiera shrugged. ‘Fine.’
‘If he’s lied about this, what else has he lied about? His qualifications? His work history?’ He’d mumbled it more to himself than Kiera but she was on him instantly.
‘What do you mean “what else has he lied about?”’ She mimicked him in a bratty, childish voice.
They were on the verge of making a scene and this was a definitely a discussion to have behind closed doors. ‘I really think we should go home. You’ve nearly finished your wine. Let’s discuss it there.’ He rose and grabbed his coat from the back of the chair. Kiera knocked back the last of her drink and stood too, slamming the glass down. They managed to make it outside but she paused in front of the large window onto the street, framed by the lights inside like an actress on a screen.
‘What did you mean, Miles?’ she spat, her features pinched as she played up to the crowd glancing at them from inside.
‘What I said,’ he protested. ‘If he’s lied about this he could have lied about other things.’ His brain flew to the thought of Jay and Kiera working together and the pit of his stomach filled with dread. ‘How could you two do this to Stella?’
‘Oh, get a grip, Miles.’
‘How can you so willingly ruin someone else’s life just to get what you want?’ From the corner of his eye he could see people in the pub watching, all pretence of not noticing gone. After taking a big breath he urged her once more to move. ‘Please, Kiera, let’s just go home. We’re embarrassing ourselves in front of everyone.’
‘Oh, so I embarrass you now, do I?’
‘Kiera, please?’
She met his gaze, glanced in though the pub window, and suddenly her face changed from hard and angry to distraught. ‘How can you treat me like this, Miles?’ For the first time her eyes were glistening with tears. He wanted to believe they were real but he could see from the rest of her face they weren’t. He’d seen her cry properly when a relative had died. Her face had scrunched up as big, fat tears ran down her face. She’d gone red and blotchy but he’d still thought she was beautiful and that he was the luckiest man in the world. He’d held her tightly through the night as she cried on his shoulder. What was happening now was completely different. It really was like watching a film. Only one or two tears escaped and she dabbed gently at the corner of her eyes with her fingertips.
Staring ahead, Miles realised that the niggling doubts that had been slowly mounting since he’d suggested they set the date for the wedding weren’t superficial at all. A deep crevasse had opened up in their relationship. It had been growing from a tiny crack for months and months. The wedding had brought out a different, spiteful side to Kiera and if he was honest, he didn’t even enjoy being with her anymore. There was something lacking in her soul. He wanted and needed something substantial in the women he was to spend the rest of his life with. Kiera had used and manipulated people to get what she wanted, not caring for the consequences or the impact on their lives. She wasn’t the woman he’d thought, or rather convinced himself, she was.
In the hotel, he’d been right when he reassessed his life. They’d been together for four years but with having been away so much, the time they’d actually spent together was less than half that. Travelling for work had made every return home feel like a honeymoon period so he hadn’t really got to know her at all. Not all the different sides to her character – the good and the bad. Being in love with someone meant loving all their negative traits as much as the positive ones, but that wasn’t the case for him and Kiera, and he had a suspicion there was much about him she wouldn’t like either.
Miles walked ahead, and as he neared the end of the street she began to follow, staying a few paces behind, her heels clacking on the ground. Anger radiated off her. At least this way they could retain some dignity. In the cold night air, without the noise of the bar surrounding them, he felt more clear-headed, and as he opened the front door to the house, and placed his keys in the glass bowl, he knew what he had to do. It was the best decision for both of them. The only one that would give them each a real chance at happiness.
Miles strode into the silent living room, lit only by the light from the hall and cleared his throat. ‘I think we should have a bit of time apart, Kiera. I think we need some space from each other.’
‘Are you breaking up with me?’ she shouted, her voice carrying a high-pitched, almost hysterical edge. From the doorway she threw her coat onto the sofa or possibly at him, but it veered to the side.
‘I need some time to deal with what you’ve done.’
‘So you are breaking up with me. You’re really not the man I thought you were.’
‘No,’ he conceded. ‘I’m not the man I thought I was either.’ He’d become a selfish, self-pitying dick and it was time to change. That wasn’t who he was deep down.
From the hall doorway she glared at him, her arms crossed over her chest. ‘By the way, just so you know, Stella might not have slept with Jay when he did her website, but I did when he did mine.’
Miles looked up into her eyes. He’d thought he loved those eyes once, but looking at her now, seeing her clearly for the first time, he realised he’d loved the outer shell of her soul not the very heart of it. And really, somewhere deep down, he’d known the truth about her and Jay. He just hadn’t let himself believe it. For Jay it would have been the ultimate win. He’d always hated Miles for having money, teasing him for pronouncing his t’s properly, calling him ‘pizza face’ and reminding him how ugly he looked with angry red spots plastered all over his cheeks. Miles bit his lip as remembered hurt almost drowned him.
Kiera’s smile was spiteful and he saw now the hard edge of the spoilt rich kid she really was. They’d never really connected on a deeper level and he’d been swept away by her. He’d still felt like the teenage acne-ridden loser who’d hit the jackpot with such a gorgeous, clever woman. He’d been too proud to admit they weren’t right for each other.
‘Did you hear me?’ she shouted. ‘I slept with Jay Adams.’
‘I know you did,’ he replied. ‘I think I’ve always known.’
‘Then you’re a complete idiot.’
‘Yes,’ he said, finally swallowing his pride. ‘I am.’
***
The next morning, Miles woke from an uncomfortable night on the sofa, fully dressed and with an aching back, to find Kiera slamming about upstairs. Trying to be adult about everything he got up and went upstairs to find her in the bedroom, shoving things into her Louis Vuitton suitcases.
He stayed in the doorway and leaned against the frame. ‘I’m sorry it’s ended this way, Kiera. I really am. I guess we just weren’t right for each other.’ She straightened up without speaking, her face perfectly made up and without a hint of puffy eyes, and before he could react she’d thrown a bottle of perfume at him. It shattered against the wall near his kneecap, sending shards of glass over the floor and releasing a heady, sickeningly strong scent of vanilla that attacked his nostrils.
‘Just fuck off, Miles, you pompous prick,’ she spat, marching to the dresser and returning with a bundle of underwear.
Well, that certainly told him, didn’t it? He backed away and went to the kitchen to have a coffee as there didn’t seem anything else he could do right now.
Half an hour later, a loud thumping told him Kiera was descending the stairs. He went to help with her luggage but as he began to climb the first few steps with an outstretched hand the look she gave him made him flinch. Had she been holding a knife he was sure she wouldn’t have hesitated in driving it deep into his chest. He swallowed hard and moved aside.
‘I’ll come and get the rest of my stuff when I bloody well want to and if you try and move any of it I’ll remove your balls with a pencil sharpener and wear them as earrings.’
‘Okay,’ Miles replied, his voice wavering a little. He cleared his throat and told himself to man up. He should have expected this response from Kiera.
Unable to watch her struggle he opened the front door for her. She shoved into him with her shoulder as she passed and he produced a rather unmanly ‘umph’ sound. She pulled the suitcase behind her down the path towards her car. Knowing it was going to be too heavy to carry, Miles followed her. She wouldn’t want him to help but there was no way she’d be able to lift it without hurting herself. She yanked open the boot, but when she turned to pick up her case she spotted their immediate neighbour looking through her net curtains.
‘Come to get a good eyeful have you, Mrs Chapman?’ she shouted, flailing her arms around. ‘Nosy old cow! Yes, we’ve broken up because Miles—’ she pointed at him just to make sure everyone knew who she was talking about ‘—is a complete dick who doesn’t appreciate me. All right? So fuck off!’
Miles felt his face flame and couldn’t bring himself to turn and look at the expression on Mrs Chapman’s face, though he could well imagine how shocked the mild-mannered, grey-haired old lady would be. He turned his head the other way only to see Stella walking Frank back towards the shop. The dog’s legs were wet and straggly from being in the sea and Miles suddenly imagined walking with them both along the beach. In his mind, they’d be laughing while Frank frolicked near the shore. Though Stella’s pace slowed for a second she didn’t stop and stare and Miles was incredibly grateful for that. It was very decent of her. He just hoped that Kiera didn’t see Stella or she might start swearing at her too and that made him feel strangely protective.
Kiera marched back into the house and was soon making it down the stairs with the second suitcase. Miles worried she wouldn’t fit it all into her sports car and glanced at the boot. If he was lucky it would just about fit or it would have to go on the back seat and he couldn’t imagine how awkward prolonging this moment while he fidgeted about with suitcases would be. Whether Kiera shouted at him or not, he decided to move the other case so both would fit.
‘Get your bastard hands off my stuff, Miles Parker, or so help me God I’ll—’
‘I’m only trying to help,’ he said, cutting her off. Poor Mrs Chapman had heard enough bad language for one day. ‘I didn’t think they’d both fit.’
Kiera stood next to him, her eyes fixed on his. ‘Whether they fit or not is none of your business. You just wait until my father gets hold of you, you weak little runt. He’ll have a field day. And don’t try and find me. I’m moving to London. I’ve already talked to Daddy and he’s going to buy me a flat so I can start my life again. Away from you. And good fucking riddance. I’ve always been far too good for you.’
Now with no idea of whether he should help her move the suitcase or not, Miles stood stock still. He was slightly worried she might have a weapon concealed somewhere and the look in her eye made him think of Hannibal Lecter when he had that mask thing on in Silence of the Lambs.
‘Well, are you going to put my suitcase in or not?’ Kiera demanded. ‘Don’t you think it’s the least you could do?’ Miles leapt to do it just to get rid of her before she had another go at him but had to duck out of the way as she almost slammed the boot on his head. With a final toss of her hair and a one-finger salute to poor Mrs Chapman who looked terribly shocked but hadn’t yet moved away from the net curtain, she stomped to the driver’s side and got in. As she pulled away she said, ‘Goodbye, Miles, you utter f—’ but the rest of her words were cancelled out by the screeching of tires as she drove down the road and out of Miles’s life.
Miles felt his shoulders relax and the muscles of his stomach loosen. Yes, Kiera had made them both the subject of gossip with her really quite fantastic exit, but at least it was done. And for some reason, he didn’t really care that the town would be talking about him for the next million years. He raised his eyes to the sky and took a breath in. The salt sea air filled his lungs, reminding him how much he loved being here in his hometown. And he felt oddly positive about what his life would be like now. As he lowered his head back down he saw Stella peering from her shop window, but as soon as she realised he was looking she ran away into the depths of the store. Closing the garden gate and turning to walk back down the path, he saw that Mrs Chapman was still watching.
‘Morning, Mrs Chapman,’ he called with a wave. ‘Lovely day, isn’t it?’